


Homebound

by Whackabee



Category: Frozen (Disney Movies)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst and Romance, Angst with a Happy Ending, Drama & Romance, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Romance, Sister/Sister Incest, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-01
Updated: 2020-05-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:06:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 134,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23937346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whackabee/pseuds/Whackabee
Summary: Elsanna. Modern A/U where Elsa is an agoraphobic who is taken care of by her sister, Anna. What more is there to say? Rated M for sexual themes. Warning: incest.
Relationships: Anna & Elsa (Disney), Anna/Elsa (Disney), Anna/Hans (Disney), Elsa/Rapunzel (Disney)
Comments: 146
Kudos: 232





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello beautiful and amazing people! I’m starting to migrate some stuff to Archive of Our Own. Here’s chapter 1 of Homebound, an Elsanna fic I wrote some years ago. I won’t really be editing it as I upload because, you know, if you read your own old writing and don’t want to vomit, then… well...
> 
> In any case I am really proud of how this one did turn out when I wrote it! Enjoy! It’s 25 chapters, around 140k words, give or take, and they’ll be uploaded here relatively quickly.
> 
> Though it is a very fun thought to go back at some point an re-write both this and my first sizable fic, that'd total over 400k words to rewrite :P

- **November 27th, 2010-**

A fifteen year old Elsa was out with her mom doing some really, really early Christmas shopping for her thirteen year old sister, Anna. Sure, the holiday was still a month away, give or take, but the platinum blonde adolescent had seen a sale for something that would be absolutely _perfect_ for her sister. It was still pricey, but Anna was her best friend, so the cost didn't matter a whole lot. _Not to mention, now that Anna's developing more she's starting to turn in to a_ very _beautiful girl._ The blond froze at the thought, eyes wide. She shook the musing off like a dog drying and ignored it.

Since Elsa was still only fifteen, she didn't have her license, meaning she couldn't drive herself to the store, which, in turn, meant that her mother or father had to drive her. Her father worked very long hours as a corporate lawyer, so it was her mother who was home during the early evening. It took some convincing on Elsa's part, but she finally managed to get her mom to run the errand with her.

It was bitter cold out, the kind that seemed to seep through, no matter how much you protected yourself from it. Luckily, Elsa and her mom were still in a car, driving down a back road on their way to a mall. The platinum blonde sat in a relatively thin jacket, as she never really minded the cold, while her mother was driving, heater on full blast, and wearing a puffy winter coat.

The platinum blonde's eyes lazily watched forestland fly by. Her eyes fixated on one specific tree coming up in a couple hundred feet. It was pushing the boundary of the forest, encroaching near the road.

That's when it happened. The world switched to slow motion, yet everything happened so fast. The car started sliding across the road, caught on black ice. Elsa clearly remembered the sensation of just... drifting away from the pavement. It was surreal. The scratching of tires across slick ice rumbled the vehicle, shouting bombarded the girl's left ear, but she didn't hear it; the tree was getting closer.

It was bizarre. Not like in the movies, nothing like a book, when their car crashed. It didn't feel rough, Elsa wasn't aware of any bouncing or sudden changes in velocity. She didn't hear a crash as the metal engine crumpled like Styrofoam against the tree's bark. She didn't feel the wind get knocked out of her. They were just there all of the sudden. The time between leaving the road and coming to a violent stop vanished into thin air.

Elsa's vision was blurry, she was seeing double and was trying her best to breathe, but her lungs just wouldn't work. No details were decipherable, but she took stock of her surroundings anyway. Broken glass, bent wood, deflated air bags. And that _god damn_ ringing. Buzz buzz buzz in her ear, she couldn't hear anything over it! "Did- did we just c-crash?" Elsa couldn't tell if she was thinking the question or actually asking it. She looked to her mother for an answer either way.

But what she saw stopped her heart. Blood. So much blood. All over the driver's side window, the steering wheel, the windshield, the headrest- everywhere. Thank God the young girl couldn't make out details for the time being.

"M-mom? Mom! MOM!" She tried to moved, but a jolt of agonizing pain shot down her neck like a gunshot. She fought the whiplash and leaned over, grabbing her mother's hands. "MOM! No, no, no! Mom! Please wake up, please! Mom, please! I need you! NO!" She shrieked like a banshee into the night, splitting the cold air like butter, practically breaking the rest of the glass in the car. Her heart choked her and she sputtered for crying breaths and hyperventilated in panic. "Please, you're okay mom, you have to be okay, you have to!"

For a little, Elsa even believed herself.

Later that night, Elsa's mother was pronounced dead, and Elsa hasn't left her home since.

* * *

**-Early September, 2015-**

"No no, make it stop, make it stop! No!" Elsa was screaming and gasping for elusive air, terrified with nowhere to run. She spun and spun trying to find any sort of hole to hide in, but everywhere she turned there were people and cars and buildings and- the world was spinning, Elsa couldn't breathe.

"Hey, hey, it's okay Elsa, I'm right here, you're okay." Anna rubbed her hand in comforting circles on her older sister's back.

The older girl fiercely ripped off virtual reality goggles and chucked the offending nightmare-inducers across the room. She was back in the comfort of her own living room. She leaned into Anna, eyes welling with hot coals, and began crying. "I-I just couldn't do it."

The red head stroked Elsa's hair and grabbed her tightly and protectively. "Shh, no, you did great today, you did great."

Blue eyes tearily met aquamarine ones. Elsa sniffled and asked "R-really?"

With a warm smile, Anna assured "yes really. I'm so proud of you."

Elsa buried her head into her sister's collarbone and clung tightly to her. Right there, in her arms, was where she felt the safest, and she never wanted to leave. "Thank you, Anna."

"It's what I'm here for."

They stayed there for a few minutes, each enjoying the warmth of the hug as it spread into their stomachs.

"Okay now, let's go get some homework done."

Elsa grinned and wiped off her face. She liked this part. She got to snuggle up next to her sister, each with their own laptop, and didn't have to try to be brave. She could just sit and do work at her leisure. She'd spend about half the time secretly looking at Anna and grinning like a lovestruck fool. Her heart fluttered and stomach filled with lovely little butterflies. Elsa hopped up, putting her stressful moment behind her for another day, and chirped "okay!" She ran off to get her computer.

Soon enough, they were huddled together on the couch. Elsa watched teal eyes stare intently at a screen, Anna's facial features curved into the very definition of focus. Her eyebrows where knitted together, and just the tip of her tongue was sticking out of the corner of her mouth. Elsa loved that quirk, she thought it was adorable. In fact, she thought _everything_ about Anna was adorable. The way the afternoon light played about on her face, dancing with her freckles. Her pronounced, ravishing eyelashes. The silly pig tails hanging down, swaying loosey-goosey as Anna leaned forward.

Cerulean eyes dilated rapidly when the red head took a sharp sigh of concentration. The older girl watched hotly as her sister's bosom expanded with air, pushing out her breasts, pressing them into her arms, leaving them nowhere to go but forward. Elsa's chest lit on fire as the two objects of her immediate attention seemingly expanded infinitely. They were full and pressed together, leaving a sharp crease between them in Anna's dress. The flames in Elsa's chest trickled into her arteries, traversing throughout her entire body like water into a sponge. She felt the hot flash meet her extremities and bounce back, dribbling down to her core, were it condensed into a concentrated ball of fire.

"Elsa, you haven't even _started_ your homework."

Her sister's voice shocked the older girl from her pedestal of imagination back down to her throne of Earth. Her heart skipped a beat and her face flushed red with an entirely different kind of heat. "I, uh-" she glanced at her screen, she hadn't even _turned on_ her laptop. "I..." Elsa sank a little in her seat.

Anna laughed. "I guess you don't have much today, then, right? Well, maybe you could help me with this one, if 'x' is-"

The platinum blonde grinned and sat up, relief splashed over her face like cool water, neutralizing the burn of her blush. She absolutely loved helping Anna with math problems. Since she was cooked up inside all day every day, she had gotten really good at some subjects. Math was one of them.

* * *

"So, what's for dinner tonight?" It had been several hours and was now getting dark out. The red head was grinning a goofy, playfully expectant grin.

Elsa tried to look serious, but failed due to the smile spilling its way out of her mouth. "I guess you'll just have to wait and see."

With a drawled out, convincing voice, the younger girl pushed. "Come on Elsa, you can tell me."

"I'll never tell," giggled the platinum blonde.

"Then I guess I'll just have to tickle it out of you!"

Before there was any time to react, the red head was upon her sister, her dainty, quick fingers attacking the older girl's stomach full force. Or rather, with the force of a feather.

Elsa squeaked and flew back into the couch, kicking and flailing uncontrollably. Air became scarce as she valiantly fought to keep Anna at bay, her abs becoming fatigued from the repetitive laughter. She couldn't help but notice each time a stray hand brushed curtly up against her breast. Each and every time it sent a jolt of electricity straight to her spine, which promptly boiled up and poured a pink blush on her cheeks and sternum.

The moment was wonderful, Anna's body slowly drifted farther on top of Elsa's, pressure welling in the older girl's core, exciting her from between her knees. At last, she was drowning in her own giggles. She strained for air, but it was never enough between bouts of laughter. Barely able to muster up the strength to speak, she relented. "Okay, okay, I'll tell you!"

"Woohoo! I win," the younger girl teased. She let herself fall face up across Elsa's lap, so her head was resting on her sister's thigh.

With a thundering heart pulsing through her body at Anna's proximity, Elsa breathed moment to rein in her spastic sternum and begging core. She grinned, unsure of where to place her hand. "Yeah, yeah, you win."

Anna smiled sweetly. Finally, the blonde cautiously rested her hand on a lean, flat stomach, all too aware of the short distance to her little sister's breasts.

"So, what are we eating?"

"Swordfish with citrus salsa. It's a new recipe I found online."

The auburn haired girl's eyes widened and her mouth visibly watered. She sat up abruptly, nearly bumping their heads together. Elsa couldn't help but notice her hand ever so lightly brush against Anna's boob, it nearly stopped her heart. "Ooh, that sounds delicious! Do we have everything we need already?"

The older girl looked down and played with her fingers. "We're just missing the swordfish."

Anna jumped up. Elsa missed the contact. "Okay, I'll run and get some!" In one blur, she had her shoes on and keys in hand. She was about to leave, and realized what she was forgetting. "Oh, uh, how much swordfish?"

Elsa grinned. "Sixteen ounces of swordfish steak."

"Sixteen ounces of swordfish snake- I mean steak! Got it!" She excitedly waved to her sister. "Back in a jiffy!"

With a pathetic wave and a sad smile, Elsa offered a weak "bye." Her heart burned. She wanted so dearly to go with Anna.

* * *

Soon, the strawberry blonde was back and Elsa was ready to start. She loved cooking, it got her mind off things. Plus, she got to show off to Anna, who always seemed amazed at her older sister's skills.

With a diced pineapple here, a sliced orange there, some pineapple concentrate, a pound of fish, and other assorted ingredients, Elsa worked her magic. She quickly mixed the salsa, setting it in the fridge to cool and expertly prepared the fish. It took under an hour, even with all the clean up, and for the entire time, she'd catch wonderful glimpses of aquamarine eyes smiling over at her. Elsa _loved_ the attention.

"It's ready!" Elsa carved them each a portion and added the salsa accordingly. She then garnished both dishes and plated the food like a five star restaurant.

The two sat down and Elsa watched as Anna dug in. Without pausing between bites, the red head gushed through a full mouth. "Oh my god, Elsa, this is amazing! Like, wow, I can't stop eating it!"

The platinum blonde's heart soared into the clouds and her face turned scarlet. She couldn't hold back an excited curve at her lips. "Thank you." Only then did she start to eat. Anna had seconds.

* * *

It was getting a little late. The two were just finishing up Anna's homework on the couch when the doorknob wiggled. The red head let out a sigh, grabbing Elsa's hand as she did. Without turning around, she said "Elsa did good today." Her voice was bitter.

The older girl held her breath, silently awaiting what she knew was coming. It terrified her.

"Is that so?" A deeper voice was disinterested.

The strawberry blonde shot out of her seat with a twirl. "Yes, it is. She worked hard, just like every week."

"I'm sure she did."

Baby blue eyes were welling with tears now as their owner curled up and hugged her knees to her chest. _Don't, Anna, please don't. Don't don't don't!_

"Do you even care?" Anna's voice was irritated now. "You're her _father,_ the least you could do is _pretend_ to care!"

The man's voice was even, it was hard to tell if it held sincerity or not. "Of course I care."

Elsa started rocking to calm her nerves. Her breaths were getting more demanding. She hated it when Anna and their dad argued, and they did it so much, but never accomplished anything. They'd just dance in hostile circles while spitting at each other's image. Even so, the platinum blonde understood Anna's frustration, she didn't like her father very much either. And, although she felt sick admitting it, Elsa understood her father's disappointment in her. It had, after all, been five years, and she didn't have much to show for it, except for hundreds of failures. _I make progress though, right? I do... I think..._

"Well, you could try _showing_ it every now and then! Ever since mom died-"

A sharp pang through the heart caused the elder of the sisters to flinch and hug her knees tighter. She choked on her heart clogging her throat and sniffled. However, it was her father who cut Anna off. "Don't mention her!"

"But you-"

"I said _quiet!_ "

Anna let out a frustrated squeal and balled her fists to diffuse the simmering blood inside. "Come on, Elsa," she commanded as she abruptly grabbed her sibling's hand. "Let's go to bed."

Gladly, the platinum blond followed the strawberry blonde. She was glad it was over, for now. The waters of disagreement were flowing in and the dam between Anna and her father was cracking. It was only a matter of time before it collapsed completely and a full out flood destroyed the house. _But for now, it's over._ She tried not to look at her father as they passed, but couldn't help it. His eyes were full of sadness.

After they brushed their teeth and each changed into a night gown in their respective rooms, Anna walked back in to Elsa's room. The older of the two was sitting up against the head rest waiting on the other. Anna sat down on the edge of the bed. She spoke with sincerity. "I'm sorry, I know you don't like it when we argue, I just, I want him to be supportive." She rested their hands gently together.

Rather than respond auditorily, Elsa nodded, sniffled, and looked down shamefully. She began to fiddle with the hand holding her own as a distraction. She knew Anna liked that, and she knew it tickled her a little.

"Elsa, are you okay? I didn't mean to upset you, I-"

"No," she interjected absently. "It's not that, it's just..." she trailed off.

"Just what?" Anna grabbed both of her sister's hands in her own and looked deeply into her eyes. "You can tell me."

"Have I been making progress?"

"Oh, Elsa." The voice was soft, comforting, and understanding all at once, something that only Anna ever achieved. The elder was gently pulled into a tender hug during which a supportive hand traced little circles on her back just like before. "Of course you have. Remember when we first got the goggles?"

Elsa mutely nodded.

"You were scared to even put them on. Now, even though I know it frightens you, you use them every week, and I see you work so hard, you're so determined." She pulled away from the hug now, leaving her hands on either one of Elsa's shoulders and practically forcing eye contact. "And that's progress, and I'm so proud of you for that. I know I say it a lot, but that's because it's true."

Elsa looked down, but couldn't hide the little, sweet smile she now wore. "Thank you."

Warm, familiar fingers brush some hair off of Elsa's cheeks. The caress sent shivers down her spine and clenched her stomach. Her heart skipped a beat and she had to hold her breath to not give in to the tender moment.

All was lost, though, when pleasant, supple lips pressed themselves against the platinum blonde's cheek. A fire was ignited in her face and chest, the feverish sensation prickling at her skin and sending heat wave down her body. Elsa closed her eyes and produced a tiny sigh at the sisterly kiss.

Then, as soon as they arrived, Anna's lips left. There was a tiny smack in the air where they were, and Elsa could feel the draft cool down her skin at the point of contact. She wanted them to stay.

"Goodnight, Elsa. I love you." Anna pulled the blankets up around Elsa and stood to leave.

"I l-love you too."

With a smile goodnight, Anna exited the room, shutting the door behind her. Elsa curled on to her side and closed her eyes, her heart begging as incessantly as a starving cat. She swallowed the lump in her throat and let loneliness surround her, just like her blanket, but keeping her cold. She wished with all her mite that Anna would come back through that door and spend the night with her.

She didn't. Just like every other night, Anna remained absent.

Elsa was hopelessly in love with her sister.


	2. Wait, Who's Hans?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains explicit sexual material. Enjoy? ;)

It was early, but Elsa was quite the morning person anyway. She knocked on Anna's door quietly at first. "Anna," she whispered, "are you up?"

A loud snort sufficed as an answer. The platinum blonde giggled and wrapped her knuckles on the wood harder. "Anna, time to get up," she called with more authority in her voice.

"Huh? Uh, yeah, just- just a few more... a few more..." words vanished into thin air and Elsa sighed. Her sister had fallen right back to sleep. She really didn't mind waking up her drained sister. It was kind of fun, actually. On top of that, it made Elsa feel important, Anna trusted her with this job, to be her alarm clock.

"If you don't get up in the next ten seconds I'm gonna come tickle you awake," the older girl chided.

That seemed to work. With new rigor, the sing-song voice sounded back. "No, uh, that won't be necessary, nope, I'm totally awake now!"

A small pang of disappointment embedded within Elsa's rib cage. She _really_ wanted an excuse to go in and tickle Anna. She didn't let it get to her, though. With a bright grin, she hollered back "okay, I'll make up something to eat!"

"Okay, I'll be down after I take a super fast shower!"

 _Anna in the shower._ Now there was something the white-blond haired girl didn't mind imagining one little bit. She could see in her mind's eye the steamy, watery pitter patter against Anna's smooth, naked flesh, the soap suds gliding silently and mercifully down her body, following the gentle contour of her womanly curves as the red head gently caressed herself with a bar. The hot water provided all the scalding scarlet that was needed, the steam meticulously obscuring all the most vital parts of the younger girl's body.

Elsa bit her lip, she was turning herself on. A temperature to match the imaginary shower's hot water pushed between her knees and she had to stomach the fire for now. "Okay," she finally mustered up. Her voice was slightly breathy. Trying to distract herself, she turned her attention to what was for breakfast. _Eggs with toast and orange juice._ It was a little plain for her tastes, but it was quick, easy, and healthy. It took no time to whip up. The eggs were over-easy just like Anna liked.

Soon enough, said red head appeared in the kitchen, hair still damp but braided into her signature pigtails. "Good morning, Elsa" she said nice and chipper, woken up by her shower.

"Good morning, sleepy-head. I just finished breakfast." She served her sister.

"Mmm, thanks!" Anna took to plate and pranced to the table, making sure to bring some butter for her crispy bread-carbon.

They sat down. Elsa poked her egg and gobbled up a small piece while Anna buttered the toast.

"Did you sleep okay last night?"

 _I would have slept better with you._ "Yes, thank you."

Anna's face coated in glee. "Well good!" To punctuate her statement, she tried to take a huge bite of runny egg white slathered in yoke, but missed. The yellow, molasses-speed liquid splotched all over her face and dripped back onto her plate, making a wet smack when the more solid egg white landed.

Elsa tried to hide her laughter, but unfortunately orange juice just really wanted to come out of her nose that morning, so it did. It hurt.

They both choked on each other's blunders until their ribs hurt and Elsa's nose burned. Faces red, they sighed and began to poke good-natured fun at each other. "Nice one, Anna."

"Oh yeah? Your OJ works weren't the most attractive thing I've ever seen."

"Well you look like you covered yourself with snot."

Anna got a kick out of that. She laughed sharply and loudly. "Watch out, I might fling it at you," she threatened.

Elsa raised an eyebrow. "Oh yeah? Go ahead, make my day."

Intense blue eyes met determined aquamarine ones. They stared each other down until the pressure was built up too much. Neither of them could keep a straight face and they erupted in glee. They finished their meal and Elsa cleaned up the mess while Anna stuck the dishes in the washer. It was time for her to leave for class.

"Bye, Anna!" The older of the two latched on with a tight hug, elation still lifting her off the ground.

"I'll be back before you know it!" She returned the hug. Elsa stood back as her sister opened the door. She caught a quick glimpse of the morning sun on the driveway. "Love you!"

"I love you too." Elsa's heart skipped a beat as she said the words.

Anna climbed in her car, Elsa watched through the window. The fatal crash five years prior flashed through her mind and made her anxious. _No, Anna will be fine._ She replaced her scary thoughts with another image of her sister in the shower.

Then, Anna was gone. Off to class. The platinum blonde pressed her hand between her legs when her sister had safely pulled out of the driveway. It was warm and clearly damp. She swallowed. She'd miss Anna, but that didn't mean she couldn't make use of the free time she had that morning.

Elsa closed her eyes and let her imagination run wild.

_"Elsa?" The young red head questioned as she lifted her sister's chin with a gentle finger._

_Bleary eyed and choking on her aching heart, Elsa looked back longingly._

_"Are you okay?" There was such care in the voice. It was so gentle, so concerned, like the only thing in the world that mattered to Anna was her._

_Through the empty pit within that devoured everything that didn't long for her sister, the older girl managed a weak voice. She felt her heart rip in two as she said the words, juxtaposed to the wild butterflies making it impossible to think about anything except how uncomfortable she was. "It just- it just gets so lonely being here alone every day."_

_In a husky voice that made time stand still and flooded the platinum blonde with intense, less-than-innocent urges, Anna replied "Oh, I think I can help with your loneliness." She grinned wryly and stepped forward, her innocence discarded like a banana peel. Elsa throbbed in anticipation, anxiously awaiting her sister's move._

A magnetic pull between Elsa's legs acted upon her hand. The other began to knead her breast lightly. Lustful heat was once again collecting in her core, dampening her panties as she imagined her younger sister and all the perfection that went along with her.

The twenty year old woman pressed down against the groin of her jeans, sparking pleasure into her body. She could feel the wet warmth emanating from the area. She bit her lip and retreated to her bedroom.

She unbuckled her jeans and wiggled out of them, discarding them at random. With her back now arched against the sheets, Elsa dug her fingers under the hem of her underwear. Using her free hand she started to gently knead her own breast, slamming her eyes shut and pretending said hand belonged to Anna. The erotic sensation exerted by the fantasy caused her to gasp and the spark between her legs ignited into a full blown wildfire.

The intense heat demanded attention, and the platinum blonde gave it just that. Cold, dainty fingers practically steamed as they pressed on her labia and began to gently rub back and forth. Bolt after bolt of indulgent current tickled her spine. The room went from tepid to sweltering, Elsa's heart worked overtime, and her breathing became laborious and erratic. Oxygen was in scarce supply in her blackened world of pleasure.

Elsa used one finger to start stroking her clitoris, gradually at first, but with steadily increasing power and agility. Her spine might as well have been a lightning rod now. The woman heaved for breath, an explosion of sexual potential building up like the pressure within an engine, driving her on a journey of pleasure.

Elsa was floating in the air, somewhere outside of reality, outside of time. Her body clenched as her own tsunami of gratification ravaged her body, from her core to her brain. She fell back onto her bed, hitting hard and panting in place.

The air cooled back down as she lay there motionless except her heart and struggling lungs. Her mind raced around her beautiful sister. Reluctantly, her hand freed itself from the confinement of her soaked underwear. Her fingers remained slippery with her own fluid of arousal. Her other hand removed itself from her worked over breast.

Suddenly, the room felt cold and lonely. For a few moments, Elsa completely enjoyed her fantasy, but it was just that: a fantasy. Her heart bled for it to become fruition. In fact, that was the least of it. The poor woman curled up into the fetal position. She simply wanted for Anna to be there, cuddling with her, whispering sweet nothings into her ear. Elsa just wanted her sister to return the burning, agonizing, one-way love she felt for her.

_Oh, my Anna._

* * *

Once Elsa recovered from her stupor, she rinsed off in the shower and re-dressed herself. She had hours before her little sister would be back, so she decided to open up her computer and read over the new power points her professors posted the previous night. That'd take a couple hours, then, Elsa presumed she would read a book. She was working on finishing up the Lord of the Rings series.

Adventure was by far the platinum blonde's favorite genre. It partially filled the void within her, helping a little to satiate her insatiable desire to venture outside. She could get lost in a world where she didn't have her fears, where the vast expanse of her imagination was the only limit on what she could do, where she could go. It was how she wished her life was.

Elsa looked out of her bedroom window. If only she could get out there, stand in the direct rays of the sun, let the Fall air swirl around her skin, allow the breeze to swoop in and swiftly carry away her fears. She rested her hand fearfully on the glass, fighting back tears. That wind wouldn't scoop away her nightmares, it caused them. That wind, that sun, everything out there was one of two things that kept her up at night. Conquering _those_ monsters was Elsa's adventure. They were one side of Elsa's Sauron. Cotton in her throat tensed her muscles and her heart shifted in her chest as a strange amalgamation of horror and sorrow acted upon it. Outside, a bird flew by, singing its way on to a telephone wire where it perched itself. It was all so intimidating, if Elsa could just get over it all, if she could just _prove_ to herself that she can survive out there. _If this, if that. If only I was that bird... free._

Leaves kicked carelessly down the suburban road, some brown, some dull yellow, and others a fiery orange. The color reminded Elsa of Anna's hair. How would their relationship be different if Elsa could go outside? Would Anna have gone to a school so close to home? Would they be at the same school? (Well, they technically were, though Elsa only took distance learning courses, letting her complete her studies from within her confining walls).

A muffled thud rippled through the air. It was a car door. Elsa's neighbor, Oaken, was leaving for work. She had never actually met the man, though he seemed very nice. He cheerfully smiled and waved to his young children and husband, who all were seeing him off. His joy looked so genuine, like he knew for a fact that he found his place in life. A luxury that Elsa didn't have. She wondered if getting over her phobia was the first step to obtaining the key to what her neighbor had: happiness.

Anna, once again, flashed into the platinum blonde's mind at the mention of happiness. Not just because she was such a generally elated person. Elsa's heart felt as heavy as lead in her chest, resting harrowingly upon her sensitive stomach. The second half to Elsa's key to happiness was her sister. The other side of her Sauron was admitting her feelings. _I need Anna,_ she reflected somberly. A tear tickled its way down the curve of her button nose, hanging to the tip, unwilling to give up its short life.

 _If I'm brave enough to face the outside, I'm brave enough to face Anna about my desires, right?_ That was it, that thought was the funnel that focused all of her sadness, loneliness, and fear into determination. The platinum blonde narrowed her eyes and vanished to the front door, taking note of the goggles resting on the floor as she arrived down stairs. _I can do this. I can do this, I can do this._ Her heart doubled up on its pace, her breaths becoming uneven and dissatisfying. She reached for the doorknob.

She was so close.

_I can do this._

She grabbed the brass. It was cool to the touch.

_I can do this._

Elsa tried to swallow her terror, but it wouldn't budge. Instead, it flourished, turning into a beast standing between her and life. The car crash raced into her mind again, jabbing her heart and stopping her breath. Her arms and legs were trembling in fright, her mother's screams echoing in her mind like a movie on repeat, never granting a single moment of reprieve. It fed her fears.

Elsa fought her panicked heart out, trying her very best to cease the tears streaming from her tightly shut eyes, trying to regain control over the arachnoid terror ravaging her insides and flooding her body with cortisol.

"Nnggah! No!" She let go and slid to the floor, crying into her hands. _I can't do it, I can't do it!_ Disappointment shut her down one limb at a time. Hope was like a light in the distance, fading in the fog. It felt as far away as- as far away as Anna was at that moment. Which, as far as Elsa was concerned, was a million miles.

"It's not fair! It's not fair! Why can't I just be normal?" The woman curled up and clenched her jaw, nearly breaking a tooth. "I just want to be happy," she sobbed to no one in particular. With a deep, irregular sigh, the twenty year old stood back up. She looked at the coffee table. Sitting upon it, waiting for her, was a novel. _The lord of the Rings: The Return of the King._ Elsa gulped her musings and shortcomings down like a bad meal and conceded to her life. Fantasy, once again, would have to suffice for now. She sat down and began reading.

* * *

Finally, Elsa heard a car engine roar and die close by. A car door sounded shut, and the platinum blonde stood, grinning widely. Her loneliness of the day was forgotten like a mathematical formula to a slumbering student. Anna was home.

The door opened, and before anyone was even visible, a beautiful voice could be heard. "I'm home now. Okay, I'll tell her. Bye, Punzie!" The red head hung up as she appeared through the doorway.

"Hi Anna!" The platinum blonde bounced on the balls of her feet in excitement.

"Ooh, Elsa, I didn't know you were right there. Rapunzel says hi!"

The older girl blushed. "Oh, um, tell her I said hi. I was reading on the couch and heard you pull up."

Anna giggled and lunged into a hug, something Elsa was hoping would happen. She let the warmth of her younger sister's body trickle into her being like water through the cracks of a parched mouth, settling into the very core of her being and quenching her thirst. It budded a warm fuzz in her stomach and dripped over her heart like sweet honey.

"How was your day, Elsa?" The auburn haired girl pulled away from the embrace far too soon. She bored her wide, blue-green eyes into Elsa, seemingly leaving physical traces on her.

 _Lonely, long,_ Elsa thought to herself. But she didn't want to upset Anna, so she didn't say either of those things. Her bosom choked as she thought back to her fight with the door handle. In a shaky voice, she admitted "Okay. I- I t-tried to go outside." She grabbed her braid like it'd protect her from the world.

Teal eyes went wide momentarily. "You did? Elsa that's- that's great!" She led her older sister to sit on the couch. "How far did you get? I mean, how'd it go?" She left a tender hand to linger on a slumped shoulder.

Elsa closed her eyes to relieve the burning building within them. Her head was weighed down with shame. "I- I grabbed the d-doorknob but-" she sniffled. "I- I couldn't turn it, I was so determined, but so s-scared, Anna!" She grabbed her sister and pressed her head against a lean shoulder to cry on. The intensity of the moment came back. Anna's t-shirt was soft and comforting, just like her skin. The contact and her sister's attentive ear helped diffuse the tension tearing Elsa's insides in half.

The strawberry blonde grabbed her older sister and patted her on the back. "Oh, Elsa, it's okay. You tried, right? I mean, it's amazing, you did that all by yourself, I'm so proud of you."

Anna's last phrase swirled around in Elsa's head. _"I'm proud of you."_ She'd never get tired of hearing that. It was like a knight in shining armor saving her at the last minute from the army of her fears and self-declared inadequacy. She loved having Anna to talk to, she felt safe with her, she could tell her _almost_ anything. Remaining in her love's nest of safety, Elsa pulled up her head and wiped away her tears. In a still broken voice, she said "Thank you. Yeah, I tried my best."

Such a wide smile broke out on freckled cheeks that Elsa thought it might actually hurt. "And that's what really matters, as long as you try your best you'll make progress."

The platinum blonde was unable to keep a small grin away. "Yeah, I guess."

"Hey, you're almost done with your book!"

It was true, there was just a sliver of pages left after her bookmark. "Yeah, all the storylines are just wrapping up now."

"It must be good, you read the series really fast," Anna teased.

The older girl blushed slightly. "I have a lot of free time, too. But it was really good, you should read it."

"Pshh, reading takes so long! Can't we just watch the movies instead?"

Elsa wondered how someone could be so lazy but keep such a thin, fit figure. _Well, to be fair, Anna just about bounces, dances, and skips everywhere she goes. That must burn quite a bit of energy._ Yes, that must be it, it explained the toned stomach and lean arms, the flat belly and sculpted calves. A baby giggle escaped her lips. "You want to?"

With an adorable glint in her eye, the strawberry blonde perked up. "Sure. I mean, yes! I have a little bit of homework to get done first, though. How about you? I mean, do you have homework?"

"No, I read all my powerpoints earlier. But I do want to finish my book."

"Perfect!" The redhead unloaded her various notes and computer from her backpack. Elsa grabbed her fictional text and they cozied up on the couch. Anna laid sideways, legs over the armrest and used her older sister's shoulder to support her back and head. It was a little difficult for Elsa to read in that position, but she didn't mind one bit. Furthermore, how was she supposed to focus on her story when Anna was laying up against her like that? Her innards became sugar coated and pleasantly temperate. Auburn hair was soft against her deltoids. The radiating body heat from said hair's owner was like a blanket wrapping around Elsa. She sighed happily and looked down at the pages in front of her while Anna clacked away at her keyboard.

Time passed by quickly as the platinum blonde once again got lost in her book. Before she knew it, the head leaning on her arm fell backwards into her lap. The motion startled her and she found herself face to face with freckled cheeks and enormous teal eyes. Anna was now resting her head _right_ on top of Elsa's core. She clenched her jaw. "Done," the red head said brightly, ignorant of the sensations she was eliciting within her older sister.

"Oh, yeah, um," slender, idle hands had to do something to diffuse the tension. They landed on a fiery braid and began to twiddle with the silk-like strands. "I'm just about done reading."

Anna giggled. Music to Elsa's ears. "Okay, I'll just stay here so you can keep playing with my hair while you finish up."

Elsa's heart skipped a beat. Her face flushed red. "I- um, sorry." She withdrew her prying fingers.

"No, it's okay, it kinda feels good."

The white-blond haired girl just about melted on the spot. Her head felt light and her vision faded momentarily in favor of processing Anna's words. The intonation sounded a little flirtatious, or was that Elsa's imagination? "O-okay."

The red head hummed and closed her eyes. Elsa's right hand busied itself by fiddling with satin bangs while she finished her book. She felt like a kite, lifted by the soft air beneath her.

Soon enough, it was time for them to set up the movie. Elsa fetched the extended version of _The Fellowship of the Ring_ and put it in, returning swiftly to her space on the couch. Anna was perched next to her, which certainly wouldn't do for Elsa. The older girl laid down, resting the side of her head on her sister's thigh. She stole a quick glance up and was relieved to see pick lips curve up ever so slightly.

Then, dainty fingers began weaving themselves in Elsa's hair, twirling it and massaging her scalp. The gentle touch sent shivers down her spine and limped every muscle in her body as she sank farther down into comfort. Her heart was soaring like a fluffed up cloud, erupting bliss into her chest like lava from a volcano. She barely stayed awake as the movie began to play.

A couple hours in to the flick, Anna became a little restless. An offending finger jabbed Elsa lightly in the side, causing her entire body to twitch to the defense. "Gah, Anna!"

The red head giggled and apologized. "Sorry, it's just this movie has _so_ much talking. It's like talk talk talk, action, talk talk, boring boring blah blah blah, action, blah blah blah."

Elsa couldn't help but chuckle at her sister's unfortunately accurate summary of the film. "Yeah, it's a lot of politics, but it's all important to the story."

"I guess but I just wanna see people sword fight and shoot each other with spells and do cool action-y stuff."

Pondering the auburn haired girl's admission for a few moments, Elsa rebutted "I just like seeing them roam around Middle Earth. All the scenery is so fascinating." Then, as an afterthought she added "but the action is cool, too." She simpered and looked up at Anna.

Understanding gleamed in the big eyes looking down at her. "Yeah, I guess it's pretty cool, you're right."

"We don't have to finish the movie if you don't want, I don't mind."

"No no, let's finish it!"

Elsa playfully raised an eyebrow. "Are you sure?"

Anna winced as she spoke. "Okay maybe just a little, teeny-tiny break. To eat or something." She held up her hand, pointer finger just millimeters from her thumb to demonstrate the brevity she was suggesting.

An airy snicker escaped the platinum blonde's lips. "Okay. I'm getting hungry, anyway."

They did just that, finished their movie, and went off to bed. Elsa, once again, clutched her blankets and desperately hoped for Anna to come back through her door at night, but just like every other night, no such thing happened. At least her heart was full to the brim with placid joy at hanging out with her sister all day, so Elsa slept well that night.

* * *

The next morning went as usual. Elsa woke Anna up, they ate together, and then the red head departed. Elsa spent the day surfing the net, looking for a new book to start, and just generally waiting on her sister to get home.

Since she didn't have too much to do, once Elsa finished her own classes for the day, she decided to dress up a little bit. She could make herself nice and pretty for Anna. _She'd like that._ Elsa grinned and meandered into her closet at a leisurely pace. It was well organized. She looked around thoughtfully. There were quite a few dresses to choose from, a byproduct of years of online shopping.

She caught herself nibbling on her tongue in concentration, something that Anna was notorious for. Giggling at herself, Elsa reached for a dress. _I haven't worn this one in a while. Plus, it matches Anna's eyes._ Excitedly, she pulled out a regal looking teal dress. It was trimmed with copper at the bust and belt, sporting stylized floral patterns on the chest. It really made it's wearer look fit to become a queen. As an optional piece, there was a very modest black upper body piece that rested beneath the official dress. Whereas the sleeveless teal portion only came up enough to cover one's breasts with decency, the optional portion was jet black and covered skin up to the collarbone and down to the wrists.

Elsa thought for a moment more and racked the black portion of the dress. _No need to cover_ all _my skin in front of Anna,_ she mused boldly. She had to admit, the sexy thought made her heart skip and she was satisfied with the amount of confidence she displayed in that moment, even if she was alone and the dress was still modest. The thought of showing Anna _more_ of her skin send pleasant tingles down the platinum blonde's spine.

The article of clothing fit snugly over her slender body, but loose enough to allow a full range of motion. The piece cupped her breasts comfortably and left her alabaster sternum exposed to the world. Examining herself in the mirror, Elsa could just barely see where her cleavage began, hidden swiftly by the overprotective fabric. With an appeased smile, Elsa gave herself a quick twirl in the mirror. The smooth dress rested splendidly on her exquisite curves. _Anna will be home soon,_ she eagerly thought.

And soon enough, of course, Anna did get back. She barged quickly through the door like a madwoman, but full of excitement. Elsa smiled from ear to ear at the sight, straightening her back and puffing her already ample chest out slightly. "Elsa-" The younger sister stopped dead in her tracks. She stared momentarily and then regained her composure. "Ooh, you look gorgeous!"

The older girl's cheeks blushed something furious and she flashed a shy smile. Her heart soared and stomach filled with warm, wiggling fuzz at the compliment. "Thank you. I thought you'd like it."

Anna's cheeks appeared to shift red, but Elsa wasn't paying much attention so she wasn't sure if her eyes deceived her. "You dressed up for me? Aww, thanks! You look super cute. Well no, that's not the right word. You look beautiful, Elsa!"

Okay, that was it, the platinum blonde was gonna faint. She prepared to swoon and crash into the floor. Compliments from Anna were possibly the single greatest part of any day.

"And you made my day even better! I mean it was already great, but now it's just super awesome!" She dove into a full force hug with the platinum blonde, nearly knocking her over.

The older of the two sisters was genuinely happy in that moment. Her younger counterpart was exuberant and dressing up had been a major success. She let the instant sink in through her skin and soak her body for a few moments. Anna was already having a good day before this, and Elsa wanted to know why. That way, she could share her sister's joy. "What happened today?"

Anna grinned like a fool. "Ooh Elsa it's amazing!"

Pale cheeks nearly ripped from the rapidly widening mouth pushing upon them. Elsa filled to the brim with anticipation, like a vase being stuffed with lively flowers. Curiosity steered her mind to racing through an astounding number of possibilities, each one more far-fetched but pleasant than the last. _Did she get an A on a test? Did she buy something? Maybe she just really really missed me, or maybe she suddenly realized her undying love for me._ Oh God Elsa hoped it was the last option. She wished that to be reality with every fiber of her being. Love flowed through her, weaving her together like a needle and thread. Her heart rate expedited. She knew her hopes were ludicrous, but she didn't care.

"I got a new lab partner, and he's absolutely _gorgeous!_ Oh my gosh, it was so embarrassing-" The story continued, something about how Anna had tripped into the guy and knocked them both on the floor, but it fell largely on deaf ears.

That wasn't the answer Elsa was expecting, nowhere close. It didn't even fall within her narrow realm of possibilities. Elsa was too busy letting her heart die to keep listening. The news hit her like a train, with essentially the same overall effect on her body. She suddenly ached everywhere. She didn't even know this dude's name and she hated him! Nothing was fair! Why was the world so cruel? Elsa was devastated inside, her stomach curled in on itself, ripping her heart away from its post, leaving emptiness where it previously was. _Anna has a crush on someone- on a GUY._ Her mouth foamed with jealousy.

Elsa swallowed her smarting heart and focused all of her energy on not letting any of her inner emotions show, now experiencing the world through a poised mask. "You- you like him?"

Anna's cheeks flushed with red. "Yeah, Hans is great, he's funny and so nice!"

Every word felt like a personal attack. _Hans, that's his name._ Elsa sharpened her face in dislike.

Twiddling one of her twin braids, the gushing girl continued. "And I think he likes me, I mean, I'm not sure, but it definitely seems like it. Just- just the way he smiled at me and we got along so well."

The platinum blonde wished desperately that _she_ could be the one to provide that smile, the one that made Anna feel special and made her blush so richly. "Do- do you think he's gonna ask you out?" She really, really hoped the answer was no, selfish as it was.

"Elsa!" the red head slapped her sister's wrist playfully. "I don't know, I mean we _just_ started talking, and sure we hit it off, but, I mean, hopefully!"

Elsa's mouth went dry. _I could ask her out first, that way- no, no, I can't do that!_ It was a pipe dream, something impossible to reach, but, like so many other things in the Hell of Elsa's life, it seemed so damn close. But it wasn't. It was just out of reach, and would only drift farther. The woman swallowed a persistent lump in her throat. She jumped when a hand touched her.

"Elsa, are you okay? You look upset."

"Yes, I- I'm fine," she fibbed.

In a stern voice, Anna probed. "Elsa, I know when you're upset. What's wrong?"

 _I love you, you can't be with anyone else!_ No, she couldn't say that. The platinum blonde's mind scoured itself for any sort of explanation, _anything._ "I- I just... don't know how good of an idea dating would be for you."

"Oh, I get it. You're doing that over-protective big sister thing."

Elsa nodded in untruth.

"I know you're just thinking of what's best for me, and I love you for that, I do, but I'm eighteen, Elsa. I think I deserve to start dating now."

"No, it's not that, it's, um..."

Furrowing her brow, the strawberry blonde tried to fill in the blanks. "Do you not trust him? Is that it?"

That sounded good, maybe that would keep Anna at home, keep her away from dating for at least a little longer. Elsa was aware of how selfish she was being, she was just so desperate that it didn't matter. "Th-that's it."

"Then if, and it's only an if right now, but _if_ me and Hans start dating then I can bring him over and you can meet him. I'm sure if you got to know him you'd see that he's a great guy."

Anna was too determined sometimes, she found a way around _everything._ Elsa was having trouble thinking straight at this point, her shock and depression at the news of Anna's crush welling within her like a tornado, making the mere act of thinking give her a headache. "How do you know? You just met him."

"Well yeah, but you haven't even met him. I mean, I'm at least in a better spot to judge his character than you, Elsa."

She was, unfortunately, right. It was getting hard for the older sister to control her own words. "You're right, I just don't know- I don't-"

Anna's voice sounded slightly pleading now. "Don't what? What are you making such a big deal about? I'm not even dating him, he's just some guy I like, I don't get what the big deal is."

The last thing Elsa wanted to do was upset her sister. She had to weather the raging anxiety storm within alone if only for the good of Anna. "I- just, nevermind, it's not a big deal."

"No, there's clearly something really bothering you, Elsa, I just want to know what. I just wanted to come home and tell my _best friend_ about my crush. I thought it was great, I thought we'd giggle and laugh about it, but you just can't, can you? Why!?"

That was a low blow. It knocked the wind out of the platinum blonde, like a line drive to the chest. It made her a little sick. "Just drop it, Anna!"

"How can I just drop it!? Look at you! Elsa, tell me!"

By this time, the older of the two just wanted to curl into a ball and scream. She didn't want Anna prying into her mind like this, she didn't want to admit anything, she didn't want to be like this. She wanted to be _normal._ Why couldn't Elsa just be normal!? "Stop!"

"Elsa!"

Elsa was losing it. "NO!"

"ELSA!"

Her grip was slipping, she was going to fall, she was going to cave, she was full to bursting. "Leave me alone, Anna!"

"Jesus, Elsa, _what is going on!?"_

Elsa needed something, _anything_ to shout out, to make Anna give up, lest she let her feelings slip out like soap. "I'm scared of being alone! Okay!?" The platinum blonde hugged herself and started rocking slightly. The admission was blatantly insufficient to explain why she made such a big deal out of the whole thing. There was no way Anna didn't already know that Elsa was lonely. But it was better than nothing, and it was true. She was mortified at the idea of ending up alone. It at least gave the illusion of a proper answer, and that's what Elsa needed at that moment. She slammed her eyes shut and waited for the pestering to continue, waited for her sister to dig deeper, to open up the gooey core of her being and lay her eyes on her dirty, not-so-little secret. Elsa waited to be called out on her lie of omission.

But it never happened.

Instead, there was a soft, sad voice. It carried something else, something intertwined with its very form: understanding. "Oh, Elsa..."

 _She took it, she's not pressuring me anymore._ Elsa told herself she was playing along, but asked a question she genuinely needed the answer for. Was she too much for Anna to handle? "Wait, y-you're not annoyed?"

"How could I be annoyed?" Anna hugged her sister tightly. Elsa melted into the embrace immediately, feeding her heart just enough to keep it alive. "Taking care of you isn't a chore, hanging out with you at home isn't something I do simply because I have to, Elsa. I love you so much. I will never leave you behind, but-" the younger sister sighed. "But I need time for myself, too. Time to go out and- and time to maybe meet someone. No matter what happens, you'll always come first, I'll always be here for you. You understand that, don't you?"

Rapidly, the platinum blonde felt horrible for keeping her sister from living life for so long, but the truthfulness of the words helped to ease her pain. She nodded. "I'm sorry I'm so needy."

"No, no, there's nothing to be sorry about. Anyone in your position would feel the same way, I understand."

Elsa wished that Anna was aware of the double meaning carried behind such a statement. "Thank you."

Anna smiled sadly. "I'm really sorry I pushed you, but you can tell me these things. I'm right here for you."

Her sister's words were like angels to Elsa, lifting the pressure off of her shoulder and allowing her lungs to stretch and consume air once again. She breathed a sigh of relief and let her chest bask in the warmth of the offered hand in front of her. _Anna will never abandon me._ Elsa clung to the words like a rock in a raging river and let herself breath a sigh of relief. She forgot all about Hans for a moment.

But only for a moment. He was still there, and Anna still liked him. Jealousy watered in the platinum blonde's mouth and her heart sank deep within her intestines. She felt turmoil clutching her neck and fought to breathe through it's strong grasp. _She'll get over Hans,_ Elsa told herself. She had to believe her thoughts, because if Anna was destined to love someone else, what was the point? If Elsa couldn't have both halves of her key to happiness then she'd be unable to open the door. So Anna had to get over Hans, she would. _They probably won't even start dating, it's just a crush, and he's just her lab partner._ The argument did nothing to comfort it's host _._

"Elsa?"

The older girl snapped out of her sea of thought and shook her head. She had completely forgotten where she was. "I- it's okay, Anna, you were right to push me, I- I should've told you sooner."

Anna sighed and took Elsa's hands. It was written all over her face that she didn't know what to say next, so she just accepted the sentiment. The platinum blonde surmised that her sister just wanted this debacle to be over. "Okay, well, I'm glad you told me either way, because now I know and I can help you not feel so lonely."

Elsa was reminded of her imaginary exploration earlier. It send shivers down her spine and she had to shift a little in place to diffuse the pressure that meandered back into her core. Her face heated up with magenta and she took a sharp breath. "Thank you."

"So, how about we figure out what's for dinner? I can't _wait_ to see what you cook for me tonight." The statement was accented with a playful wink that made Elsa's heart skip a beat.

With a timid curve of her luscious red lips, the platinum blonde agreed. "Okay." _No way,_ she thought, _no way Anna will go out with Hans._


	3. First Date(s)

Elsa clung to her idea for as long as she could. _Anna will not go out with Hans, no way._ It was Wednesday and had been a few days of no new news about the mysterious man, so the platinum blonde's hopes were starting to rise. They were filling like a balloon with helium, more confident that they were right with every passing hour. Elsa even began to relax a little, to forget about her sister's crush and let things just naturally slide back into the way they were before. After all, Anna _was_ bisexual, that was pretty clear based on how she swooned over different actors and actresses. Elsa got a little too comfortable in her seat above the clouds though, because her hopes were yanked right out of under her, causing her to crash back down to reality.

Anna came home one afternoon squealing with _big_ news. She skipped into the door, grinning form ear to ear, and face red from the apparent squeaking and cheering she had done all the way home that day. She bounced in place, unable to rest her body. "Elsaa! He asked me out! Hans _actually_ asked me out! Me!"

And just like that, Elsa's world died. The life within her withered like a rose during winter, the petals of her heart browning and falling off to decay. It felt like she had just been stabbed. She wanted to scream, to deny Anna permission to go, to _tell her the truth._ But she couldn't. Through the black gook that used to be her heart, Elsa forced out a smile. "Th-that's-" _horrible, terrible, depressing-_ "wonderful." She couldn't breathe.

"Right?" The boisterous red head practically screamed. "The date's on Friday!"

Elsa didn't _want_ to feel what she was feeling. She didn't _want_ to let her torrent of emotions get the better of her. She _wanted_ to be happy for Anna, to be normal. But she wasn't, and she couldn't control her feelings, they pushed tears into her eyes and a lump into her throat. She tried not to cry, but her voice betrayed her. "Ah-Anna, that's in three days!"

"I know! Isn't it great?" Then, the elated teenager realized the crack in her sister's voice. "Oh no, Elsa, don't cry!" She hugged the platinum blonde. Her voice had dropped from exuberant to concerned so quickly Elsa almost didn't notice.

But she felt terrible. Elsa felt like a scumbag for stealing her beloved, cheerful sister's happiness. But she also didn't want this date to happen, it'd solidify the fact that Anna wasn't hers and probably never would be. She melted into the embrace and let her tears roll a little more freely.

Anna patted her back. "I know you're worried about being left alone here, but I promise, I won't be too long, and- and I'll come back and tell you all about it! That'll help, right?"

Elsa cringed at the idea. That wouldn't help at all, hearing all about the fun Anna was having with some random guy. _Oh Anna, if only you knew the full truth..._ A tense throat barely let the platinum blonde sniffle and sigh to calm her breaths enough to talk. "Yeah that'd- that'd be great," she said unenthusiastically.

"See, it'll be okay."

Closing her eyes tighter and latching airtight onto her sister, Elsa whimpered. _Three days,_ she thought, _three days until Anna starts actually dating this guy._ Reality wretched her stomach. _I have to make them count._

Time passed like sand in an hourglass as Elsa tried to think of what she could do special for Anna. There was probably something, there had to be, but with such a boulder hanging above her head, the elder sister couldn't think straight. Futile, she let the minute slip by as she clung to Anna's slender figure. She felt like she was going to lose every opportunity to enjoy such an embrace, that she'd lose Anna completely immediately following the date, even though she knew that wasn't true. Just as Anna had said, she'd always be there. It sure didn't feel that way, though.

A tentative voice woke Elsa from her thoughts. "Elsa, are you ready? For the goggles?"

The platinum blonde's heart sank like a rock in dark water. She indulged in a deep breath. Truth be told, she wasn't ready at all. "Y-yes. Let's get it over with."

Based on her response, Anna apparently sensed the hesitation in her sister's voice. "I know you hate them, but you've gotta do it."

"I know," Elsa said quietly.

"But hey, better to get it over with, right?"

Clamping her eyes shut like clams, the older girl nodded. It was true, better put it behind her now than have it hanging over her head all day. It, combined with the knowledge of Anna's date, pressing on her chest all day might be too much.

"Okay, let's go." They retrieved the virtual reality glasses and hooked them up to Anna's computer. The display allowed her to see what Elsa was seeing. That way, she could monitor any progress and see exactly what was frightening her sister. Silently, the red head pulled up the setting for city block as Elsa watched in apprehension. Anna handed her the goggles. In an understanding voice, she said "take your time," and rubbed her hand on her sister's back. Her eyes were concerned, but also resolute.

Elsa fed off of the resolve in Anna's eyes, taking it to heart as best she could. She tried to focus, to clear her mind and prepare, but simply couldn't. Hans was plaguing her mind like a sickness. She felt like she had a fever, at least when she tried to think. Her thoughts were blurry and out of focus. Unable to find her concentration, Elsa clasped her thundering heart. Her stomach shriveled like a prune and her lungs rejected oxygen. All she could hear was her own breath and heartbeat. She closed her eyes and put on the goggles.

Nothing had been added in to the illusion except for buildings and empty streets. No people, no cars, no traffic lights, no birds, nothing. Normally, Elsa was able to suck it up and walk through this part. Usually, she could overcome the terror rising within her. Sure her wits would be on end, but she could do it.

Except, right now, she couldn't. Anna and Hans smiling and laughing and- and _kissing_ popped into her head. She lost her focus, let the tide of fear within her grow and overflow. A boa circumscribed her chest and she felt the onset of a panic attack. The world around her didn't help. The buildings imposed upon her like massive, malevolent monsters, commanding the streets to grab her feet and keep her from escaping. It felt like being trapped in a dream in which she was being chased, but couldn't move. She could feel her doom inches behind her, gaining on her every second, but her legs _just wouldn't_ budge. They were lead, they might as well have fused to the floor. Elsa's breathing was erratic and her heartbeat irregular. She was suffocating on air.

"Whoa, Elsa, it's okay, it's okay, you can do this." Anna's calm voice attempted and failed to distill a horror-stricken mind. A soft hand patted Elsa's back, smacking down the fear within like a blanket flogging a fire.

Elsa closed her eyes and fought tears. _I can do this, I can do this. Anna believes in me._ But from underneath her eyelids came a vision. Her dear sister leaving, hand in hand with a faceless man, waving at her. A vision of Anna leaving her alone. A vision of Anna never _ever_ returning her love. A vision of her sister rejecting her for someone else. _No, no!_ "No!"

A rip rung the platinum blonde's ears, red light blinded her through her clamped eyes. Warm, loving arms swiftly protected her from the shadows of her fears. "Elsa, Elsa, it's okay, look at me, look at _me_."

She did. The fake world was gone; Elsa's sister had removed the goggles. Directly in front of the platinum blonde's face were teal eyes laced so intricately with concern that she couldn't even make out the stitching. Her body began to calm down but her tears remained.

"Are you okay?"

Breathy, Elsa said "yeah." Then, shamefully, "I'm sorry."

"No no no no, Elsa, come here." Anna tightened their embrace so Elsa was sobbing on her shoulder. "It's okay, you don't have to be sorry, you didn't do anything wrong."

"I- I failed," the white-blonde haired girl croaked. She felt the weight of remorse tug on her heart strings.

Anna's voice was sincere. "No, you didn't."

"B-but I usually get farther than that. I failed, Anna. I failed you, I failed myself." _Because I couldn't stop thinking about your stupid date._ Elsa winced at her own, internal mention of Anna's upcoming night out. She was wildly jealous. _Because I couldn't stand the thought of not having you all to myself... I can't stand the thought of not having a chance with you..._

Softly, the red head began massaging her sister's scalp. The action tingled Elsa's spine and she cooed silently at the heavenly feeling. "There's no such thing as failing on this, there's just trying, and trying again. Okay?"

Elsa sniffled and nodded. "Okay."

"That's enough for this week. I know you've had a lot on your mind lately." _Oh Anna, you have no idea..._

"Thank you." It was a minor relief to know that was over for a full seven days. But in comparison to the pile of rocks crushing her soul, that one pebble being removed didn't help all that much.

"So, uh," Anna started, clunkily trying to change the subject, "what do you wanna do? We could play a game or something."

Elsa thought of her long list of exactly... zero items she had thought of to make the most of her days with Anna. The quiet voice was timid and unsure of it's step, testing the ice below it lightly before moving forward with each stride. "Actually, can you- can you just... hold me?" Elsa diverted her gaze to her own feet, unable to meet her sister's eyes.

"It'd be my pleasure."

The platinum blonde's heart skipped, the simple answer sent her like a rocket above the clouds. She almost choked on her desperate joy. She looked up at her heart's greatest desire with smiling eyes.

Anna wore a wide, natural grin on her face. "Come here," she led Elsa to the couch by the hand. There was no resistance while Elsa giddily followed.

The strawberry blonde perched herself on a cushion and patted the spot next to her. Elsa took it, heart a-flutter. Anna put her arm around her sister's shoulders, plunging an alabaster cheek against her shoulder. Reflexively, Elsa put one arm behind Anna's back and the other across a shapely stomach, hugging her from the side.

Anna placed one hand on Elsa's back and used the other to lovingly caress her cheek. It gave the older girl goose skin all over her body. She closed her eyes in delight, purring, and joined together with her sister's form. Her stomach erupted with warm, sweet honey and finally, her mind cleared of all compromising thoughts. She let the beating of their hearts align and felt perfectly secure. _This_ is what Elsa wanted every day, forever. _Cuddling with Anna is the perfect way to make the most of my time with her._ "I love you so much, Anna." She only wished that her words would carry as much weight for her sister as they did for her.

"I love you, too, Elsa."

* * *

And before Elsa knew it, it was Thursday, and Anna was gone for class. She was, once again, left alone a house that felt too huge at the moment, yet so small so often. She needed to clear her mind before she started her schooling. _Shower, yes, a shower will do good to get my mind off things._ At that, she retreated to her room and undressed.

Dressed in just a towel, Elsa entered the bathroom and started the water to heat up. She hung her towel and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She had no make up on, her hair was loosely in it's braid, and her mouth curved into a frown.

Elsa wished she could say she saw a beautiful, sanguine women standing there, but she didn't. She saw a frightened girl, someone who was too weak to overcome the obstacles presented to her. She saw a scaredy-cat. She saw someone who was so pathetically frightened of everything that it surpassed pity and was just pathetic.

There, staring back at her stood a woman who slept in loneliness every night. Someone who often had the company of fear and misery. This, Elsa mused, was someone who didn't deserve an ounce of the support that Anna gave her. _This must be what my father sees when he looks at me_. Someone who's done nothing of note, someone who's only ever failed at what she tried with her life. Someone who likely will never get better.

Elsa hated her reflection, even under the gaze of her own eyes she felt exposed. Sadness clung heavily to every feature. Though there wasn't anything physically wrong with what she saw, Elsa pierced through that thin shell into the core of her being with harshly judging eyes. To sum it all up, she saw a failure. _I see what my father sees._

But the look changed when she thought of what Anna saw. Anna still worked so hard with Elsa, she clearly hadn't given up. With her sister on her mind, the platinum blonde's reflection gleamed with something in it's eyes. Hope. Hope shimmered like a dying light through thick darkness. The red head brought a small smile to red lips.

Elsa no longer saw a failure. She no longer saw such a ghoulish representation of herself. She saw a woman who, though she was sad and scared, wanted more. She saw someone who wanted dearly to overcome her own mind and fears. All of the sudden, Elsa found herself staring face to face not with someone who was doomed to fail in life, cursed to spend every waking hour for the rest of her existence bound to her home, but rather someone who _could_ change. Someone who _could_ do great things.

Determination sparkled like a star on a clear night in her eyes. When Elsa thought of Anna, she saw hope. She saw everything that could be. She saw the best, the flaws took a back seat and her strengths took the wheel. Yes, when Elsa had Anna on her mind, she saw a lonely girl who was in love, and willing to do anything for it.

Elsa smiled and tried to hold on to that thought. _I love you, Anna._ She hopped into the shower, looking forward to spending time with her sister; her bright ray of sunshine.

* * *

When she was out of the shower and drying her hair, Elsa heard the muffled bang of the front door shutting. She froze as the first unlikely scenario entered her mind. _Is there a burglar?_ Her heart sank and a momentary sense of dread came over her. She started to panic, until reason took over. _No, no way, we live in a suburb and it's mid-morning. Plus, I didn't hear a crash or anything to indicate someone broke in. Then, who's here?_ There were two options: the only two other people that lived there. Anna and her father.

Her dad, however, never _ever_ came home before night time, and he usually wasn't even back when Elsa went to bed, so he was unlikely. But then, so was Anna. She was on campus, in class at this very moment. At least, normally she was. _Maybe her professor let her out early? But then what about her next class?_

The platinum blonde quickly threw a towel over her body and wrapped her plentiful hair in another to let it dry. Cautiously, she crept downstairs. As she entered the foyer, she saw a man with light brown hair quickly approaching the front door, ready to leave.

"D-dad?"

The man seemed startled but stopped and turned around. "Elsa, hi."

Talking with her father one-on-one with no Anna there to back her up was nerve-wracking. Elsa could feel her own courage cowering. She felt the overwhelming urge to shift in place. She couldn't keep eye contact with him. Her voice was as shaken as her resolve. "W-what are you doing home?"

"I'm just grabbing a paper I forgot for an important meeting later."

Elsa despised when her father and sister argued with each other. She'd rather try a more civil approach. Nonetheless, she didn't really think before she spoke. Maybe it was her yearning for company combining with her lack of a father figure over the last few years that took over her mind, but her words came out very needy sounding. "Are- are you hungry? I could m-make you something, just let me get dressed and-"

"No, Elsa, I can't stay."

The young woman backed off. In an odd way, she was disappointed in the answer she got. She looked down and hugged herself. "Oh, okay." Elsa managed the courage to glance briefly up in that moment. For a split second, just a hair of time, father and daughter's eyes met. She thought about her time in front of the mirror and wondered what her father saw right then.

And just like that, the door slammed shut and Elsa was alone again. "Bye," she quietly mumbled to the empty room. She tried to focus on her studies, but couldn't, nor could she get lost in her new book: _The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo_.

She just mindlessly watched some TV and waited for Anna to come back.

* * *

"Elsa, I'm home!" The chipper voice was music to the platinum blonde's ears. She jumped out of her spot on the couch and ran for her sister.

"Anna!" She collided full force into a hug.

"Els- oof! Hi!" The auburn haired girl was thrown back a couple feet and returned the embrace. Elsa _needed_ that contact. It fed her soul, made her keep surviving. She'd surely shrivel up and die without Anna. The red head giggled. "So I guess you missed me."

Elsa blushed but stayed where she was. The nail was hit right on the head, driven all the way in with one swing. She _really_ missed her sister. "Yeah."

"I missed you, too."

The white-blonde haired girl fought nervousness to squeeze her words out of her choking neck. "Dad came home today."

Anna pulled away to look at her. "Wait, what? When?"

"A little while before lunchtime."

"What happened? Did you talk to him? Are you okay?"

Elsa nodded even though she wasn't exactly sure about the answer to the question. _Am I okay?_ She felt a pang of sadness in her heart. "We didn't really talk, he was in a rush."

"What'd you say to him? Did you say _anything_ to him?" The voice was concerned.

Elsa quickly recounted what transpired earlier. Anna didn't look too happy about it.

"Well, the least he could have done is say bye, or _something_."

"He was busy, he had to get back," the older girl declared lamely. _Why am I making excuses for him?_

"That doesn't matter, Elsa, you're his _daughter, we're_ his _daughters._ He should be able to make time for his family." There was a twinkle of annoyance in Anna's tone, and Elsa knew it wasn't directed at her.

"I- I guess you're right." Anna's point brought up another disheartening thought. _Is dad purposefully not making time for us?_ Given their history for the past five years, Elsa was pretty sure she knew the answer, and it broke something deep down within her heart.

The strawberry blonde confirmed Elsa's suspicions. "Don't you see? He's avoiding us, he never wants to talk."

The older sister sighed. "It would have been nice to cook for him," she added wistfully.

Anna bit her lip. "Well," she said cheerfully, "why don't you cook for me? I'm starving!"

There was that thing that Anna did again, where she could make everything feel okay and wipe any emotional baggage under a rug like a dust bunny. Elsa smiled. "That sounds like fun."

* * *

Today was the big day: Friday. The day of Anna's date. Anna clearly couldn't be more excited, she came home already bouncing off the walls. She nearly bashed her head against the ceiling and _did_ accidentally ram into the front door before opening it. "Elsa Elsa Elsa! He's picking me up at seven!"

Unwilling to bring her sister's mood down, Elsa swallowed the heartache she felt. She stomached the jealousy. "Great," she said with little enthusiasm. _Three hours, that's all I have with Anna before she goes out._ It felt like the end of the world was approaching.

"I have to get ready! What should I wear? Hair up or down? Ooh, or in a bun? What do you think?"

"I, uhh," the platinum blonde was flustered by the flurry of questions thrust upon her. "I don't-"

"That's okay, we'll try everything!" Anna grabbed her sister by the hand and yanked her up the stairs.

"Oof!" Elsa supposed this would be a good way to spend the afternoon, watching Anna get all dolled up. If she pretended that Anna wasn't going out with some guy, she'd be able to thoroughly enjoy herself. All the dressing up would be for Elsa, at least in Elsa's mind.

In a flash, they were in Anna's room. She practically kicked through the door to her walk-in closet like a bettering ram. Dresses hung from coat hangers, some lay discarded on the floor. Jeans, sweatpants, and shirts were tossed haphazardly, hanging off whatever unfortunate item they just happened to collide with. _How does Anna find anything in here?_ Intertwined with the intricate mess of clothing were assorted bras and panties, none with their match close by. They were mostly pretty standard, except for one bra that Elsa happened to notice. It had lace on it, but was opaque. Her cheeks flushed with heat, unable to help but imagine her sister in such an item. _Where did she get_ that _!?_

Anna bit her lip in thought. "Okay, so, first thing's first, Hans said nice, but not too formal. I'm thinking a strong color, something that'll really make an impression." She began sifting through her unorganized options.

"Oh, you'll make an impression alright," Elsa teased.

With a little playful slap to the shoulder, Anna squeaked "hey!"

"It was a compliment, you'll be beautiful in anything." Elsa's heart twitched at the thought that Anna was prettying herself up to go see someone else. She pushed it aside for now.

The red head's cheeks stole some of her hair's color. "Thank you."

"How about this one?" Elsa had spotted a jet black dress while secretly analyzing the undergarments strewn about the room. She plucked the dress from it's rack.

Anna glanced over and took it. "Ooh, let's see." The red head shamelessly started lifting her shirt, revealing illustrious skin and a belly button. Her toned stomach gave way to reveal the very bottom of her bra. It was green. Elsa's eyes went wide, pupils dilating and soaking up the sight rapidly, greedily memorizing every detail, each freckle and soft line, the gentle curves. Her knees felt weak and her face felt like someone had poured scalding water all over it. Her stomach whirled around, creating a kinetic friction in her lower abdomen that ground at her core. Elsa's mouth went dry.

"Anna!" She quickly but reluctantly turned away to give her sister some privacy. The urge to keep watching was powerful and it took all of Elsa's willpower not to spiral and enjoy the show. She steadied her breaths.

"Oh relax, Elsa, we're sisters. It's not like anyone else is gonna see."

Something about that line or the way Anna said it made Elsa's mind go nuts. She closed her eyes and willed away the wetness creeping between her legs as best she could. Talking was a challenge. "I- I'm just a little un-uncomfortable."

There was click and a zip as Anna undid what the older of the two assumed was her jeans' zipper. "Sorry, I'll give you a little warning next time," she chimed.

Elsa gulped. She was on fire, she was going to die. She squeezed her knees together. _Anna has no pants on._ "Th-thank you."

"But just let me get this straight, a minute ago you're saying I'm beautiful and now you _don't_ want me to undress?"

Okay, that was it, that was the line that killed Elsa. She couldn't breathe, her lungs felt like stone and her womanhood flared with passionate need. That was flirtatious. Was that flirtatious? It sure sounded like it. _No, no way Anna's flirting with me._ She tried to talk, but just bits and pieces of syllables came out. "I- uh, I- that's- I-"

"Relax, Elsa, I was being facetious, sheesh." The older girl could almost _feel_ the good-natured eye roll. "Anyway, I'm decent, it's safe now!"

Elsa took a deep breath. It was over, Anna was covered, her hyperventilating heart could take a rest. When she did turn, her cheeks were still painted rosy red. "Thank you." What her eyes landed on was the beautiful form of her sister smiling over at her, wearing a knee-length black dress. The outfit was form-fitting but loosened a little on the legs, allowing for comfortable movement. Smooth shins disappeared into the hem of the dress, and the top half was modest as well, just showing the young girl's sternum. Elsa grinned. Anna always dressed fairly modestly, so she didn't have to worry about her sister being eye-guzzled by this stranger.

The thick black color and gentle skin tone worked together to make Anna's pig tails look more of a light hazel with a pinch of fire to give it life. Her freckles were partially drowned by the more demanding color, but still noticeable on her cheeks and the bridge of her nose.

Elsa didn't realize she was gawking.

"Well," Anna inquired, "how do I look?" She held her arms out to the side, as if presenting herself.

"You look- wow, Anna you look amazing!" The platinum blonde slipped into her imagination in a split second. She imagined walking into a dimly-lit restaurant, the table candle lit. Anna strolled in wearing her black dress, grinning widely, her hips swaying as she walked. Her and Elsa, out together for a date. The notion was magical, enrapturing. Elsa's heart pounded and bled for the ability to go out side, to show her sister a perfect date. She couldn't though. All she had was her imagination.

"You think so? I don't know, I mean, I like this dress but I'm not really feeling the black tonight, you know?"

Then, Elsa had an idea. She ignored her sister's questions and timidly looked at the ground. "do- do you think I could dress up, too? It'd make me feel like- like I'm not s-stuck here."

Anna hopped over and took Elsa's hands, jumping up and down in place, an excited grin splitting her face from ear to ear. "Yes! That'd be so much fun! We can play dress-up until I go! Ooh, we can even match!"

Elsa was greatly uplifted by the energetic reaction. She got infected by her sister's smile and giggled, heart fluttering like a happy butterfly in the spring. Her stomach relieved itself of the tension it created and rested lightly in her gut. "Okay!" _It'll be just like we're dressing up to go out together!_

"I'm thinking about this one here. Got anything to match it?" Anna held a royal blue dress up.

Immediately, Elsa knew which dress to get. "Yes!" She ran off to retrieve it. Elsa was so excited. She got to dress up with Anna and pretend _they_ were going out. _Going out. Together._ And her sister loved the idea, that was the best part. She imagined her own, shining star smiling lovingly and taking her hand, leading her out into the world she was so terrified of. She imagined Anna as her shelter from the storm of terror constantly raging outside.

In fact, she kind of was. Anna was basically all that could calm Elsa down, Anna kept her grounded during her sessions with the virtual reality goggles. If anything was worth overcoming her fears for, it was Anna.

But overall, Elsa was ecstatic to pretend she was going on a date with Anna, even if the red head wasn't sharing the same fantasy.

Soon enough, Elsa was in her own closet, which, in juxtaposition to her sister's, was neatly organized. All her dresses hung on one side, her shirts and pants on the other, a laundry basket sat in the corner. Even that was neatly packed. With the help of organization, the platinum blonde located the dress she wanted in seconds.

It was simple and light blue. The skirt fell loosely down to her feet. The upper portion cupped her breasts such that very little, if any, cleavage was visible. The tone of the dress was reminiscent of her eyes, and since her hair was basically white, those two things and her lips were just about the only color on her body. This gave a powerful illusion, making her eyes look as piercing as an arrow and her face immensely expressive. The color play wasn't overt enough to mask her freckles. Rather than sleeves, the dress had drapes of fabric that rested on her shoulders.

Elsa put the dress on, fixed her hair, and zoomed back to her sister's room. What she saw stopped her lungs. Anna was in the breathtaking, rich blue dress she had pointed out, hair still in pigtails resting on her bosom. She wore a sweet grin at first, but her mouth changed into a gaping hole. The intense blue of her clothing brought out the more subtle cyan of Anna's eyes, making them look almost as stark and fierce as sapphires. Unlike Elsa, she wore no lipstick, leaving the pink in it's natural hue. The dress left her upper chest exposed, covering her breasts but showcasing what little cleavage she had. It made Elsa's heart race and shoot into her throat. The dress was down to Anna's calves and had white crocuses patterned in the naval and lower rib area. The enrapturing colors once again strategically drew attention away from Anna's freckles, yet left them prominent enough to compliment her hair color. To put it simply, she was downright ravishing. If there was one object of perfection in the world, it was Anna in that moment. Her radiant beauty almost blinded the platinum blonde like the lights of heaven. Unbeknownst to her, Elsa was drooling a little bit while the stunning figure before her was burned into her mind forever.

Both spoke at the same time.

"Elsa, you look-"

"Anna, you-"

Again, they sputtered simultaneously.

"No, you first."

"You first."

Each stayed quiet for a moment, both waiting for the other to listen to their command. Anna caved first. "Okay, okay, Elsa you look- wow! Like, amazing! It's been a while since you've worn that one, you should wear it more. I'd forgotten how great you look in it."

Elsa blushed wildly, grabbing her braid and diverting her attention in embarrassment. The heartfelt compliment went right to her head, making her feel dizzy. Her stomach lifted into her chest and spewed feathers all over her heart, tickling her insides with elation. Her legs denied her weight for a split second, and for that instant she thought she was going to swoon. "Thank you," she said, still wearing a brutal blush.

"So, what do you think?" Anna held her arms out again and bit her lip in excitement.

Elsa tried to find words, but they were all zooming by so fast she couldn't catch them. _Ravishing, delicious, gorgeous, perfect, amazing, cute, hot, sexy, did I mention perfect?_ "You- you look- you look-" her mouth continued to move but no sound was produced.

"Speechless," Anna gushed, "I'll take that as a compliment."

Cheeks still hot, Elsa nodded vigorously. "It- it is. Venus has nothing on you," she said, unsure of herself.

Freckled cheeks flushed with pink. "Aww, thanks, Elsa!" She quickly captured her sister in a bear hug. The older girl couldn't breathe for that moment, but that was okay, she didn't want to. She just wanted to look at Anna more. She also couldn't help but notice her younger sister's breasts slam up against her own. It shocked her spine with pleasure, vibrating her heart. Her hands tentatively patted Anna's back.

Anna pulled back and nibbled her lip. "Now, hair. Pig tails? Yes?"

Elsa thought for a moment. She smiled. "No, put it down."

"Are you sure? Because I-"

"Yes," Elsa said, confident in her decision.

Anna nodded. "Right, hair down." She undid her normal hairdo, brushing it back into order with quite a fight. After some taming, it cascaded down her head and flowed smoothly over her shoulders and down her back in it's natural, lightly wavy structure. The strawberry blonde hair resting on Anna's shoulders offered her dress an immediate compliment, gleaming in the light. "So, how does it look?"

With a stupid little grin, something Elsa noticed she got a lot when with Anna, she assured "it looks amazing" with endearment.

The blush returned mildly to Anna's face. "Thank you." Then, she donned an evil grin. Trotting towards Elsa, she held her hands out. "Your turn."

"M-my turn? For what?"

"To put your hair down, silly!"

Reflexively, Elsa grabbed her braid protectively. Due to her condition, she wasn't good with change, she couldn't recall a time when she _didn't_ wear the braid. It was her trademark, it was like an anchor for her. And changing that sounded scary to her. "Oh, I'm not sure-"

"Come on, Elsa, you'll look even beautifuller. Not, fuller, I mean more beautiful. Not that you're not beautiful! You are, you're super beautiful, but I just think you'd look good with your hair down."

"I don't know..."

"Pleaseee Elsa?" Anna produced the most effective puppy dog eyes the world had ever seen.

"Okay," Elsa relented.

With a squeal of delight like a pig in slop, the auburn haired girl got to work. "You have such lovely hair, it's so soft," she commented while she undid her sister's braid.

Elsa blushed. "Thank you." She reveled in the sensation of her sister working on her hair.

"There, done!" Anna stepped back several minutes later to admire her handy work.

It felt weird. The older girl was used to feeling that voluminous, familiar bundle of hair napping on her shoulder. Instead, she felt the light caress of a few stray strands peeking in along the front of her body rather than her back. She felt naked.

"It looks perfect. Plus, now we have matching hair," Anna purred.

Shyly, Elsa looked down and accepted it. If Anna liked it, she liked it. "Yeah, we do."

Anna tapped her finger on her lips. "Now, what's missing?"

Elsa concentrated, gladly looking over her sister's form again. Her eyes were drawn to the movement of a slender finger giving luscious pink lips love tap after love tap. Elsa smiled again. She had completely forgotten that Anna was dressing up for Hans, not her. "I know."

"What?"

"I'll be right back." She once again dashed to her room and back. When she got back, she revealed deep red lipstick.

"Oh, Elsa, are you sure?"

"Yes, it'll look great with your dress."

"No, I mean, that's your favorite one, can I really use it?" Anna's voice sounded... _God, what was that? Honored? Excited? Timid? Wonder? A mix?_ Elsa couldn't tell, but there was something about her sister's voice that made her want to skip around and sing.

Lovingly, the older girl nodded and handed the tube over. Anna squealed "Oh thank you!" and snatched it up. She turned to the mirror and carefully applied the cosmetic. The give that her lips displayed when pressed lightly with the item just went to show how soft and silky they truly were. Elsa felt heat rising within her. She wanted to press her own lips to Anna's.

"Ta-da!" Anna spun around, resting her hands on her hips like a model.

Now, pure red lips contrasted royal blue fabric, making Anna's eyes pop out even more. She looked, if possible, better than she did before. Elsa stared for what felt like a solid minute. "Perfect."

"Are you sure I'm not over-doing it a little bit? I mean it's just our first date and I guess I don't even know where he's taking me yet, he wanted it to be a surprise. But then again, he _did_ say to dress up, but that it's not a suit and tie place. I mean, my dress isn't _that_ fancy, right? I won't be over dressed? Okay, I need to breathe."

Elsa would have giggled, but she was reminded all at once that Anna was about to leave her to present herself to Hans. This wasn't for her, she was just helping. All of this work was directed towards _Hans,_ not Elsa. Her heart sank and she felt a lump press into her throat. "It'll be perfect."

This seemed to calm the red head's ramble-inducing nerves, because she sighed with relief. "Okay, good." She checked the time. "Oh! Hans will be here soon!"

Elsa held back tears.

* * *

Before she knew it, it was time for Anna to go. She had been texting a little back and forth since they both dressed up. Elsa assumed it was Hans. She swallowed the bile-like taste left her mouth from the thought.

"He's here!"

Elsa silently followed her skipping sister to the door, desperately wishing her to stay.

Before she opened the portal to Elsa's worst fears, the red head turned and hugged Elsa tightly again. "Wish me luck!"

Faking a smile, the platinum blonde clutched her sister in a death grip and did just that. "Good luck. Have fun tonight, Anna." She did want Anna to have fun, just not with Hans.

"Thanks! I will! I'll tell you all about it once I get back."

"G-great."

Anna swung the door open, Elsa backed away to avoid getting too close to the threshold. Once Anna was gone she could cry. But now she had to be strong, she had to let her sister be as happy as can be, that was only fair. She looked up to see Anna off, but was startled at what she saw. Emerald eyes were standing before her, wide and excited.

"Hi Elsa!"

Flustered, the platinum blonde blinked a few times. "Oh, uh, hi Rapunzel." Rapunzel had been a long time friend of both Anna and Elsa's. She was a year older than Elsa, and the three had been very close before the accident. Since then, Rapunzel had come over every now and then to catch up with them both. Because of how good of friends they used to be, Elsa knew Rapunzel was lesbian, and, consequently, Rapunzel knew of Elsa's preference. Elsa looked at Anna, who was practically dancing in place at the door, with inquiring eyes.

Awkwardly, the green eyed girl spoke. "You look nice." The statement was directed at the platinum blonde.

Elsa blushed deeply. "Thanks?" Rapunzel wore a pretty standard green dress and had done nothing with her long, golden locks of hair. They reached down to just above her rear.

"If I had known you'd dress up I would have, too." She gave the platinum blonde a shy smile.

Elsa looked at her quizzically. She glanced over at her sister. Then back at Rapunzel. Then back at Anna trying desperately to figure out the situation. "Uh," butterflies ravaged her stomach like hungry rats. "No, it's- you look great. Anna, what's-" It was only when she saw Anna's impossibly wide smile that she pieced it together. Elsa's eyes popped out of her skull and rolled away.

"Oh, um, by the way Elsa, Rapunzel's coming over to keep you company while I'm out. eh-heh."

The new arrival's face flipped into shock and embarrassment. "Wait, Anna, you didn't _tell_ her!?"

"Tell me what!?" Elsa silently hoped with all her heart for her guess to be wrong. She pleaded with her own mind to tell her that she was amiss, even if it'd be a lie. Sure she didn't know that their old friend was coming over, but there was _clearly_ something else happening that she wasn't aware of, too.

Anna laughed awkwardly. "She's, um, she's here for a date."

 _Nope, I was right._ Elsa didn't even know what to think. She froze like Han Solo in carbonite.

"Oh my God, Anna, you really didn't tell her _anything_!?"

"Um, I gotta go, Hans is waiting, bye kids, have fun! But not too much fun!" She sprinted like a hiker running from a pack of angry wolves, slamming the door behind herself, effectively trapping both other girls inside with each other.

Rapunzel turned back to Elsa tapping the tips of her fingers together. Both girls blushed wildly, providing enough heat to keep the house warm for a month. Unsure of herself, Rapunzel shyly looked up and once again baby blue and emerald green eyes met each other. "Um, hi."


	4. Similar by Nature

"So, uh, shall we?" There was a nervous laugh.

Elsa had totally forgotten that they were just standing in her foyer, Rapunzel backed against the door. Elsa blinked to bring herself back to reality. "Uh- umm..." The air seemed to stand straight and stiff.

Rapunzel used an apologetic and slightly panicked voice. "It's totally okay if you don't want to do this, it's just that Anna told me that you agreed to this and everything and you apparently didn't even know that I was coming over, let alone for a _date_ and I just don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with." In that moment, Rapunzel _really_ looked like a tomato. Elsa was sure she did, too.

Rapunzel's awkward rambling was so reminiscent of a certain red head. The way Anna went on and on when she was nervous, and how she'd sometimes run herself completely out of breath, just like Rapunzel did there. It made Elsa feel more at ease. Anna was out with Hans, Rapunzel was here, and Elsa had a choice. She could sit at home, helplessly imagining her sister's date a million times and each time work her way farther into a pit of anxiety and loneliness, or she could invite Rapunzel in and have someone to talk to and distract her. "N-no. I m-mean yes, it- it'll be fun."

Rapunzel perked up and took a tentative step closer to Elsa. She was smiling now.

Elsa just shifted in place.

"So..." the older woman started, letting her voice hang like a fishing hook between them.

"So," Elsa parroted.

"Are you sure you're comfortable? Because we can just hang out, it doesn't have to be a date if you don't want." She sounded a little defeated as she mentioned her last point.

Auburn hair and teal eyes skipped into Elsa's mind. Her heart burned with desire for Anna. It made it hard to breathe. _But Rapunzel is so much like Anna._ It was true. The button nose peppered with freckles, the big eyes (even though Rapunzel's were green and Anna's were not), the adorably overt awkwardness. Elsa swallowed. It tore her heart in two to do this, but she knew Anna wanted her to do it. If nothing else, this was for Anna. "I'm s-sure. It's a d-date."

Rapunzel seemed to be put more at ease by this. She stood more confidently, taking a step forward. "So, what should we do?"

Elsa shrugged and looked at her toes. "I don't know."

The guest pursed her lips. "Okay, well, what do you and Anna normally do?"

"We just," the platinum blonde pondered her and Anna's time together for a moment. It brought a goofy grin to her face. "We normally just sit and talk, or do homework or watch a movie. Sometimes we just enjoy each other's company." Elsa thought about her most recent experience with that, Anna just cuddling her on the couch. She blushed. "Oh and I cook for her a lot."

Rapunzel brought her shoulders to her ears. "Well, I _am_ kinda hungry."

Elsa smiled. "What do you want to eat?"

"Hm. What can you make?"

Trying not to sound full of herself, the younger woman responded "pretty much anything." She fell serious quickly. "As long as we have it here," she said wistfully.

A gentle hand perched itself on Elsa's shoulder. She looked at it as her cheeks flushed with heat, then diverted her attention, trying to hide the crimson on her face. Rapunzel and her had hugged, and she had even helped Elsa through a couple panic attacks in the past, but they were never on a date before. This touch felt... different. "I'm sure everything we need is right here."

Elsa smiled and they went to check the pantry and fridge for supplies. Unexpectedly, Elsa missed the contact.

"Hmm, how 'bout," Rapunzel slammed a box of pasta on the counter, "spaghetti."

 _Anna loves spaghetti!_ "Um," Quickly, Elsa checked the fridge for parmesan, sauce, and ground beef. They had everything. "And meatballs?"

Rapunzel licked her lips. "Of course!"

"Okay!"

Elsa began to work on the meatballs. Rapunzel started heating some water. Elsa told her when to add the noodles so they'd be ready at the same time as the meatballs. In no time, the platinum blonde was straining the pasta and preparing their meals. She was dishing out portions when she asked "how many meatballs?"

"Just a few, please."

Elsa's silly smile was showing again as she thought about her sister. "Anna's favorite part is the meatballs, sometimes she just takes a bunch of them and leaves the pasta." She giggled as she spoke.

Rapunzel didn't have the heart to tell Elsa that she already knew that, so she just smiled at the woman's contagious grin. " _My_ favorite part is the pasta," she said proudly.

With a slight blush, the platinum blonde agreed. "Mine, too." She took a couple extra meatballs.

They sat down at the table, across from each other. Elsa was vaguely cognizant of a few glances that Rapunzel stole at her. As they began to eat, Elsa's mind wandered to Anna. _What's she doing right now? Are they eating yet? Is she having fun? Without me?_ She felt a pang in her heart. All of the sudden, she wasn't very hungry and started just playing with her food. She wanted Anna to be _there_ , not out, not flirting with someone else.

"Man, every time you cook something it's delicious!"

The compliment pulled Elsa back from her painful musings. She looked up from her food and met Rapunzel's eyes. They were sincere. Elsa blushed and looked back down. "Thank you."

"Elsa," Rapunzel leaned closer. "Are you okay? You've barely eaten anything."

In truth, Elsa missed her sister dearly. Despair was budding in her body like a poisonous fungus, spreading spores to every inch of her insides and killing her from the inside out. Jealously hung in her mouth like bile. Elsa took a breath. "I'm- I'm fine."

"Are you sure? Are you uncomfortable? Am I making you uncomfortable?" Rapunzel paused. "Do you not want to finish the date," she added more quietly.

"No no, it's- it's not you."

"But there is something wrong, isn't there?"

Elsa decided to tell a partial truth to her good friend. "It's Anna. I'm- I'm just worried about her."

"Worried she'll get hurt?" Rapunzel's voice sounded very concerned.

With a sad smile, the platinum blonde said "yeah, something like that."

"She'll be okay," Rapunzel assured. She smiled. "I know how much you love her-" _Oh Rapunzel, you have no idea-_ "but she can take care of herself."

That didn't help at all.

"Plus, if this Hans guy breaks her heart I'll slap him an extra time just for you."

This made Elsa chortle a tiny bit, her cheeks painting pink. She looked up at her date. Rapunzel seemed very pleased with how the evening was going. "Make that two extra times."The thought of smacking this unknown guy made Elsa feel better.

Rapunzel beamed. "Deal."

They finished their meal. Elsa removed the dishes from the table and put them in the sink. Her mind once again drifted to Anna. Was Anna just finishing up now? Were her and _Hans_ about to have dessert? _Is Anna having more fun than she has with me?_ That hurt. Elsa felt her stomach sink. _They're probably laughing and joking and- and doing cutsie things like feeding each other._ Elsa didn't really know what a real date was like. After all, she wasn't at the point where she was interested in seriously dating someone when that fateful night came along. In fact, back then, she was just really coming to terms with her own sexuality. So really, anything in her mind about Anna and Hans seemed realistic enough. _They- they could be hugging and dancing and- s_ he thought the last word with sorrow attached to it- _kissing._ Elsa sniffled and closed her eyes to prevent tears from staining her cheeks. She let the lump in her throat stay. She had the impulse to text Anna but did her best to ignore it.

 _Wait,_ she suddenly realized, eyes widening. _If Anna and Hans kiss, is- is Rapunzel going to want to kiss me? Do people even_ kiss _on the first date?_ Elsa was becoming fatigued from all this worrying. She couldn't tell what emotions were welling up within her stomach, but they made it hard to stand up. Nonetheless, her cheeks reddened at the idea of kissing Rapunzel. _I could pretend she's Anna..._

"Need any help?" The green-eyed woman appeared just behind Elsa, startling her. Elsa squeaked, jumped, and dropped a dish in the sink with a loud _CLASH._ Luckily, it didn't break.

Rapunzel winced. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to scare you!" She took a step back, face hot.

Elsa chuckled. "It's okay, I just got... distracted." _She_ is _a_ lot _like Anna._

A breathy laugh escaped Rapunzel's lips. She let her muscles relax once she knew that Elsa didn't hold it against her. They looked at each other in the eyes and both erupted into laughter.

Eventually, with both girls out of breath, the laughter died down. The air between them was no longer suffocating and they began to feel more at ease next to each other, just like when they were spending time as friends. Elsa couldn't help but smile inside as all the memories she had with Rapunzel swirled through her mind.

Rapunzel playfully jabbed her date in the ribs with her elbow. "Well, you're jumpy tonight!"

Elsa blushed and tried to hide it behind her shoulders. "I'm nervous." That wasn't the whole truth, but it was the truth.

Rapunzel's face went red as a strawberry as she looked shyly at the ground. "Yeah, I'm nervous, too."

This made the platinum blonde's heart flutter. She went to grab her braid, forgetting her hair was down. The lack of a puffy chain of hair on her shoulder momentarily confused her, and her fingers instead found long, wavy locks to twirl.

"Do you wanna watch a movie," the emerald-eyed girl asked.

With a pure smile, Elsa said "yes please."

"Yay! What do you wanna watch?"

Elsa shrugged.

"Well, I know your favorite genre is adventure, so something adventure-y," Rapunzel reasoned out-loud.

The younger woman tried to think of a movie she hadn't seen but wanted to see.

"Or," Rapunzel interrupted Elsa's train of thought, "we could watch a-" she smiled at Elsa- "romance movie."

Elsa's heart skipped a beat or ten. She choked on her own mind with her eyes bulging out of her skull and cheeks and chest flushed with a scorching fire. _Is Rapunzel flirting with me? She is, what do I say!?_ She needed to fan herself, it was too hot in that kitchen. Elsa didn't know that her date was about to say she was just joking around when she spoke. "I..." Elsa muttered. "Romance sounds good." She smiled diffidently.

Cheeks flushed, Rapunzel erupted into a grin. "Okay!"

They decided on _Silver Linings Playbook_ and sat down on the couch. Before they started the movie, Rapunzel turned to Elsa, chewing on her lower lip. It reminded the platinum blonde of her sister yet again. It all was beginning to amalgamate to a very confusing sensation in Elsa's gut. Tentatively, the older of the two asked "so, I've been wondering, if you didn't know I was coming over tonight, why'd you, ehem, why'd you dress up?"

Elsa blushed. She thought back to her wonderful time with Anna trying on dresses. It made her grin like an idiot. Anna's shameless changing made Elsa take a deep breath and developed pressure between her knees. She got lost in the memory momentarily: the minutes she forgot that Anna was dressing up for someone else, when it was all for her. Elsa felt light as a feather. She wished Anna were there now. Timidly, she began to answer with a voice softer than a feather pillow. "I um, I dressed up with Anna to feel- to feel like I'm going out, too."

In an understanding voice, the other girl placated Elsa. "Aw, that's adorable. It take it from your smile that it was fun."

Elsa took a breath of relief, letting it massage her insides as a rosiness picked up on her face. Her mind was back on Anna. If only she were on a date with _Anna_ right now. "Thank you. Yes, it was amazing," she managed.

"And, um, your hair looks really nice down," Rapunzel said quickly, biting her lip in nervousness, and her cheeks coloring once again.

Elsa blushed and looked away, again wrapping silken strands of hair around her fingers as a distraction. "Thank you." She didn't know exactly what to say. "Anna wanted to put it down so we'd have matching hair tonight."

"Well that was a great idea on Anna's part."

"Yeah, Anna's great. But I think she looks better than I do with her hair down."

"I don't know, I mean, you're pretty gorgeous, and you have such wonderful hair!"

Elsa was ravaged by a blush and she looked at her lap. "Anna's more gorgeous. I don't think _anyone_ can match her beauty," she said endearingly, forgetting that she was actually speaking to someone.

Rapunzel cocked and eyebrow but shrugged it off. She grinned. "You two are so close, it's so cute."

The platinum blonde smiled, still lost in thoughts about Anna. "Yeah."

They started the movie. Rapunzel gently reached her hand out and grabbed Elsa's very softly. The platinum blonde tensed and froze in place. She thought about pulling her hand away, but then thought about Anna out with _stupid_ Hans. She swallowed a lump in her throat. Why couldn't Anna be there with her like every day? _Because,_ Elsa thought sadly, _she needs a life outside of me. I love you so much, Anna._ She lightly gripped Rapunzel's hand. It was a little comforting.

The women sat and enjoyed the movie in silence. Elsa sat straight up, making no motion to lean against her date. _That,_ she thought, _is reserved for Anna._

By the end, Rapunzel was sopping loudly and Elsa was in desperate need of a tissue. The movie was so touching. "Oh my God," the green eyed girl began, "that was adorable!"

Elsa sniffled and wiped a dribbling tear from her eye. "Yeah."

"I'm so glad they ended up together! They made such a great couple, don't you think?"

The platinum blonde thought of her sister. She momentarily imagined Rapunzel saying that line about her and Anna. Her heart filled with warmth and her stomach became giddy. _Anna and I can still end up together. Just because she's on one date doesn't mean I don't have a chance. But movies aren't reality, real life doesn't always have happy endings. It didn't for mother..._ She tensed her conflicted stomach. _But me and Anna can still have our happy ending._ She looked at Rapunzel. The girl was _so much_ like Anna in almost every way. She left her thoughts for later. With a silly grin, she finally said. "Yeah, they were a great couple."

Baby blue eyes met intense green ones. Elsa couldn't help but stare at the huge orbs. She mentally replaced them with the teal eyes she knew so well. Anna's eyes were so beautiful, so enrapturing, so capturing. She could stare into her sister's eyes forever. They were like the sea, revealing more and more about themselves as you got lost deeper and deeper into them.

But Elsa wasn't staring into Anna's eyes, she was staring into Rapunzel's. She gave a small smile. _Green is pretty, too._

Elsa's heart doubled over in rigor. Her temples pounded with blood and her head filled with alarm. She thought about her earlier question: _is Rapunzel gonna try to kiss me!?_ If she was, it'd be now, right? _Don't people stare into each other's eyes like this before their first kiss? At least, they do in the movies._ Elsa didn't have much more to go on. The room became sweltering, Elsa could feel sweat beads forming on her forehead. She was a little excited at the idea, but also terrified by it. Would it block her from ever being able to be with Anna? Would it make Anna jealous? Would it have no long term effects? Did Elsa _want_ her first kiss to be with Rapunzel? She didn't know the answer to any of the questions, and even more started popping up in her head. Her flurry of doubt cascaded down her chest like tumbling boulders.

As difficult as it was for Elsa to admit, she liked Rapunzel. That being said, she _loved_ Anna _._ Her feelings for her sister were all-encompassing and Anna would remain the single most important person in her life. It was only when Rapunzel clutched her hand tighter, slowly slid her eyes shut, and began to lean forward that Elsa snapped her attention away, her cheeks and chest still blood red. "I- uh, I- what time is it?"

Rapunzel blinked a couple times, taking noticeably deeper breaths, and face a brand new color. Her eyes were still bright with jubilation, but also despondent.

The girls checked their phones at the same time. "Ten thirty," they both said simultaneously.

"Then- then Anna should be h-home soon."

Rapunzel cleared her throat. "Ehem, yeah. Um, I- I should get home."

The platinum blonde felt a tingle of sadness within, but she knew her sister would be home, and that knowledge overpowered any other emotions. Seeing how uncomfortable her date was in the wake of their almost kiss, Elsa piped up. "N-no, you don't have to."

Rapunzel's demeanor seemed to tranquilize itself. She clearly got some piece of mind that Elsa didn't want her to go just yet. "Well, okay. Do you wanna, um, have some dessert?" Her eyes went wide. "Not- not like _that_ kind of dessert, just- just 'dessert' dessert."

Elsa brought her fingers up to shield her mouth as she snickered, though she couldn't help the heat on her body. "How about some ice cream?"

"Sounds delicious!"

They made up some quick bowls of the frozen treat and ate in relative silence. The air between them was still a little tense from their near-kiss experience, but it did loosen up quite a lot. Soon, Rapunzel had to be getting home.

Before she left, Rapunzel turned quickly and said "hey, Elsa, um, I just wanted to say that- well I just want you to know that I really had a good time tonight. With you." She was blushing ferociously.

Elsa thought about the comment. She _did_ have fun with Rapunzel, and it kept her mind off of Anna's date for the most part. She was thankful for that. It was certain that, by now, if Elsa didn't have company, she'd be balled up in her bed, sheets soaked with her own tears and heart barely beating. She'd be wilting like a plucked flower. _And this was Anna's idea._ Yeah, Anna was pretty smart, and super sweet, she really did find something that'd keep Elsa from feeling too lonely that evening. With a light blush and little smile, she rebutted "I had a good time, too."

This seemed to uplift Rapunzel and she smiled from ear to ear. "Well, uh, good! M-maybe we can do this again sometime?"

Elsa didn't want to lead her friend on, but if Anna and Hans remained together- the thought brought a cold shudder down the girl's back- then maybe it'd be good to keep her options open. _Right?_ After the time she spent with Rapunzel, Elsa was sure she was at least a little interested in her, and she might not ever be able to be with despising the idea of Anna with someone other than herself, Elsa put on an upbeat mask for Rapunzel. "Yeah." She discretely choked back tears that were begging to come back. _Anna can't be with Hans, Anna_ has _to be with me!_ _They only went on one date, maybe it was terrible, maybe they won't see each other again,_ Elsa selfishly hoped.

With a smile as bright as the sun, Rapunzel stepped forward into a hug.

Elsa froze. She felt like she had stage fright. Rapunzel had her arms rapped around her, though not tightly, more of a friendly hug than anything else. Even so, Elsa's heart stopped. She was being hugged. After a date. That had to mean something. It felt vaguely like Anna's hugs, albeit quite a bit looser. But that was probably just because both Anna and Rapunzel were bubbly, petite women. Elsa shook off the tension she felt and brought her arms up. She hugged Rapunzel securely. "Thanks for tonight."

The older of the two pulled away, blushing wildly and looking down. Barely able to meet Elsa's eyes, she said "oh, uh, no, thank you."

With a quick breath to mix the still air between them, Elsa smiled and fanned her hot face off.

Rapunzel bit her lip and grinned. "Well, um, bye!"

Elsa stepped away from the opened portal and waved. "Bye."

* * *

A car pulled into the driveway not too long later. Elsa's ears perked up. She roused her body from the couch and approached the door as she heard muffled voices growing closer. Anna's was unmistakable, even if she couldn't understand what was being said.

The other voice was deep. Soon enough, they were close enough to the door that Elsa could decipher the conversation.

Who Elsa assumed to be Hans said "I had a good time tonight."

"Me too, I had a lot of fun- oh, hi, you're close to me."

There was a pause. Elsa knitted her brows together, wondering what was happening. They were standing _right there,_ what could possibly be proceeding that she couldn't pick up on?

The quiet was broken by her younger sister's nervous giggle. Resentment whirled within Elsa like a pernicious disease. She had her own ideas of what could have just happened. _Did they hug? Did they kiss?_ The thought made her stomach wretch. Oh, the unsavory, familiar, bitter taste of despondency that lingered in her mouth.

She was so caught up in the moment that she missed the rest of Anna and Hans' goodbye. The door swung open, startling Elsa. She jumped back as if to pretend she hadn't been eavesdropping, airway strained.

"Ooh, Elsa, you scared me!"

"I..." Sparkling blue eyes looked over their sister's shoulders at a figure retreating in the background. The man was tall, sporting short brown hair, and appeared well dressed, though Elsa couldn't make out much more than that. His side burns were clearly outrageous, though. _This_ was the man that was taking her precious Anna from her. Elsa felt the pit of her stomach grow heavy. "Sorry," she finished.

"It's okay!" The door shut. Anna skipped in, showcasing the joy she had gotten that night that her older sister couldn't provide her with. "I can't wait to tell you all about tonight! But first," Anna stood in front of Elsa. "How'd _your_ date go?" She accented the phrase in a very suggestive manner.

Elsa cringed at the thought of hearing about her sister's night out with Hans. She pondered her own time with Rapunzel and sucked on her lower lip. Her cheeks lit up at the memories. She looked at her hands, which were clutched together to the point of blanched fingers. "I missed you," she admitted.

"Aw, Elsa, I missed you, too." The strawberry blonde grinned and stepped forward into a hug. Anna's embrace was warmer than Rapunzel's, she could feel her sister's heartbeat against her own. Anna's hug made her legs melt into jello and Elsa easily rested her cheek fondly against hers, letting out a happy sigh. She felt special in Anna's arms, how tightly they held, how long they embraced. Elsa felt tears accumulate behind her eyes. She didn't want Anna to go out again, she wanted her to stay there.

"I'll tell you what," Anna said, "let's get ready for bed and we can tell each other _all_ about our nights."

"Okay," Elsa acquiesced.

Reluctantly, the embrace was broken. The younger girl fell serious for a moment, capturing her sister's eyes in her own teal ones. She held both of Elsa's hands. "I know you missed me," she said softly, "but thank you."

Elsa relished in the hand holding. "For what?"

Anna grinned and very gently placed a kiss on her older sister's cheek. Elsa's heart melted like heated metal, sending globs of boiling lava all over the rest of her body. She had to consciously think to remain upright as the exquisite, malleable lips burned her cheeks crimson. When Anna moved away to speak, she left her lips close to Elsa's ear. She felt the hot breath trickle down her shoulder. It sent goosebumps all over her neck. "For being brave for me."

Although Elsa knew that in reality the kiss was most likely chaste and sisterly, it felt like much, much more. She couldn't help a lovestruck smile please her features and bent to Anna's will. They went up and brushed their teeth, changed, and were ready for bed in no time. They sat next to each other on Elsa's bed to talk.

"Okay, I wanna know _everything._ What'd you two do? Did it go well? Did you have fun?"

Elsa summarized her night with Rapunzel for Anna. She left out the parts where she compared the blonde to her sister and the fact that Rapunzel and her held hands and nearly kissed. By the end of her recount, her face was flushed with such a new color that she might as well have been a completely different person.

Anna grabbed her sister's hands ounce again. "I'm glad you had fun, Elsa," she tenderly acknowledged.

With a sunny curve of the lips, the platinum blonde said "me too."

Then, her sister's mouth turned into a lopsided grin. Anna winked as she spoke. It made Elsa's heart skip a beat. "But I get the feeling you're not telling me _everything._ "

Again, the older girl went to grab her braid for comfort, but found just waves of perfect hair in its place. She looked away from Anna's eyes, hands still trying to locate something to latch on to. They found her sister's and began playing with slightly cool fingers. Elsa's heart vibrated in her chest like a hummingbird's wings.

"Oh come on, Elsa, you watched a _romantic_ comedy, there's gotta be more to the story." Anna's voice was playful yet not pressuring. Elsa tried to hide her blush.

"We- um, when we watched _Silver Linings_ we- she held my hand."

With a wide grin being mirrored even in her eyeballs, Anna raised an eyebrow. " _She_ held _your_ hand? What happened, did you not hold hers back?" Her voice was skeptical.

Faintly, the platinum blonde admitted her deed. "I did." _And then I stared in to her eyes and thought about you while we nearly kissed._

"Awww, that's so adorable!" Anna looked like she was about to go into cute-overload and would need to be resuscitated.

Elsa just smiled.

"I'm glad you two had fun, I had a feeling it'd work out," the auburn haired girl said smugly.

With a rude invasion in her chest, Elsa self-consciously asked "w-why didn't you tell me?"

Anna gently stroked Elsa's arm. She opened her mouth like she was going to say something, but then closed it. Her facial features shifted, as if she thought better of something. Then, she finally answered. "Because- because I didn't want to risk you saying no."

"W-why?"

Pink lips pursed. "That doesn't matter right now."

In such a feeble voice that it might as well have come from an injured puppy, the older sister pleaded. Her heart felt heavy. She had an idea about why Anna didn't tell her. "Please tell me."

Anna examined her sister. She took an audible breath. "Okay." She looked down. "You- with your... condition-" Elsa winced. This was going exactly where she feared it would. "I- I just didn't think you'd be very receptive to the idea."

Elsa gulped a lump down her throat. _Does Anna really think I'm that pathetic? That I need someone else to decide when I should date someone?_ "Y-you think I can't... do it?" A tear rolled down her cheek.

"That's not what I meant, Elsa." She tried to grab her sister's hand, but the platinum blonde yanked away. Anna had hurt her quite a bit.

"Th-then what did you mean?"

"I meant that- that-" she sighed. "I meant that I know that change is really, really hard for you, and I thought maybe I should, you know, give you a little push. I thought it'd help."

Elsa choked on her sorrow. They sat in painful silence for a long time. Finally, Anna pushed more. "I was right, wasn't I? You wouldn't have agreed to it, would you?"

Shamefully, the older girl hung her shoulders. Anna had just been thinking about what was best for her. She felt a pang of regret for assuming that her sister, the nicest person in the world, and the one person she truly and still loved, had given up on her. She unwillingly admitted defeat. "No, I wouldn't have."

Anna placed a testing hand on her sister's shoulder. Elsa was once again receptive to the touch, so she began to rub it a smidgen. "I'm sorry for going behind your back, I really am."

Elsa nodded.

Affably, the red head spoke again. "Are you okay?"

With a sniffle, the older girl rebutted "yes, I'm- I'm okay." But the question still remained in her mind: _Does Anna believe in_ me _? Or does she think she has to do everything? Does she think I'm incapable by myself?_

"I love you."

That made the corner of Elsa's mouth twitch up. "I love you, too." She decided to do her best to put her hurt behind herself, just so that she could suffer more and make Anna happy. Biting down the distaste within, she pressed on. "H-how'd your d-date with Hans go?" Good lord those words made her feel sick to her stomach.

Red hair blurred as Anna flopped back on the bed with an elated little squeal. She lay there as she began to recount her night, hair spread out and forming somewhat of a crown around her head. She talked animatedly, using her hands and the air as props.

Elsa sat quietly, taking every phrase like a personal blow, keeping a fake smile on as a front to keep her sister bubbly. She felt herself dying inside as time went on and Anna talked about how great dinner was, how much of a gentleman Hans was, and how unbelievably nice he was to her.

And Elsa hated it all. She felt a torrent of emotions so volatile they should be considered a life threatening illness build up within her, howling for escape. She choked back tears, salty embers sizzling at the bottoms of her eyes, in her tear ducts. Her chest tightened and nearly snapped. Breathing was getting harder and harder. She bit her tongue nearly to the point of blood loss and raised the knife that would put the last hole in her heart.

"D-did you k-k-kiss him?"

Anna giggled and turned bright red. She bit her lip with a silly grin and lunged the knife right into her sister's heart. "Yes. But- but just a little kiss!" _That must have been why they went quiet at the door._

Elsa didn't want to know more, she wanted it to end. She wanted Hans to _go away._ She wanted Anna to love _her,_ not fall for someone else. Through stiff breaths she forced herself to think one line over and over again: _it was just one date. Just one date._

Or was it?

"A-are you going to- you know, to go on another d-date?"

Anna smiled dreamily. "It looks like it. I mean, nothing's official but it went so well that I can't imagine we won't."

"That's uh, that's great, Anna."

` The red head clearly sensed something amiss in her sister's voice. She sat up and drew lines of concern on her face. She apparently connected the dots in her mind quickly. "Is everything okay? Remember, I'm never going to abandon you, Elsa. Plus, now you can have Rapunzel come keep you company." She winked and gave a light elbow.

Elsa was so lost that she didn't react to the wink. "I'm- yeah, everything's fine, I'm just, I'm just..."

"Just what?"

"I'm tired, Anna. I need to get to sleep." Elsa new damn well she wasn't going to be sleeping that night.

"Please don't evade me, Elsa, I want to help you." Anna's voice was blatantly filled with sincerity.

Elsa closed her eyes. She didn't want to hurt her sister's feelings, but this was something she'd have to figure out by herself. By its very nature, the predicament necessitated Elsa to work it out alone. Or at least, that's what it felt like. _I at_ least _need some time to think about it alone._ "I- I'll be okay, I promise, I just have to think."

Anna pursed her lips, clearly reluctant to leave. Eventually, however, she decided that Elsa deserved the privacy she requested and stood to go. "Okay, goodnight, Elsa."

"Goodnight."

The red head bent over and kissed her sister on the cheek. Elsa closed her eyes and shuddered in delight. She gulped, trying to enjoy the instant while she could. She waited for her sister to turn to leave, then tenderly placed her hand on the area of her cheek that Anna kissed. She laid down on her side and curled into the fetal position. Her mind swam.

She pushed herself back to her date with Rapunzel once again, she thought about Anna. She didn't know what she was feeling, but it was far worse than unpleasant. It made her want to cry, scream, howl, laugh, and punch the wall all at the same time. It sat in her stomach like a rock, but also filled her gut with butterflies.

Elsa was being torn apart on the inside. She didn't know what was going on with her, she didn't know how to fix it. She was losing Anna. But she had made a connection with Rapunzel. And as she lay there, rocking back and forth in her own confused tears, Elsa couldn't help but wonder if Rapunzel could complete her key to happiness. Maybe it wouldn't work as well, but it could possibly force the door at least, right?

_Is it possible for me to fall in love with someone else?_


	5. Things are Different Now

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second of two chapters I posted today- trying to catch up a little from the weekend 
> 
> If you haven't read chapter 4 yet, hit that back button and give it a read :)

Elsa spent time thinking over everything about Rapunzel and Anna. In fact, she spent almost two weeks mulling over her happiness. It was quite a troublesome equation on its own, with multitudes of variables and growing even more complex when she tried to toss Rapunzel into the mix.

Eventually, a well-worn Elsa puffed out a breath and had to admit that she was vexed. There was no way she could solve it through pure theory. Trial an error was the only plausible solution to this mess. Pins and needles prickling her abdomen, Elsa pulled out her phone. She had to see Rapunzel again.

She had actually waited so long that Anna and Hans had gone out several more times and were now "official". Maybe that's what really put Elsa over the fence, but either way, her balance had deviated. She hovered her hand over Rapunzel's name. Butterflies didn't even begin to describe what she was feeling in that moment. She would have equated the feeling more to a hatching nest of spiders rather than a tribe of innocuous butterflies. Pinching her nerves with an exhale, Elsa hit dial.

It was ringing.

 _Wait, what time is it? Should I be calling her now?_ Her mind was trying to find a plea to hang up.

Another ring.

Soon, Elsa began to relax. Maybe Rapunzel wouldn't answer and she wouldn't have to do this _now._ Yes, that would be a load off her chest. _Then I could call her again when I'm feeling braver._ Elsa loathed to let it keep ringing.

But then, the buzzes stopped. Elsa's breath hitched in her throat. Rapunzel had answered.

"Hey, Elsa!"

The blue eyed girl's words were congested. "Hi, um, Rapunzel."

"So uh, what's up?"

Elsa felt discombobulated. Her heart rate was in flux, her stomach tightened, and her precious air turned solid within her lungs. _What should I say? Do I just_ ask _her out again or do I just talk?_ She was bested by the situation. "Hi." _What!?_

The voice that volleyed back sounded rather amused. "You already said that, Elsa."

The platinum blonde wanted to strangle herself. Why was this so difficult? It was just Rapunzel. If just asking for a second date with her was this hard, how preposterous was the idea that Elsa could ever admit her more-than-sisterly love to Anna?

"I know, I- I, um..."

"You..." Rapunzel let her voice teasingly trail off. She sounded like a cat who had finally cornered a mouse.

Elsa felt like that mouse. All in one breath with celerity, before she could properly process her utterance, she ejected "I was just calling to see if you wanted to go on another date."

There was a _really_ uncomfortable silence. Elsa felt like she was going to vomit.

In the eleventh hour of Elsa's visceral suffering, a very Anna-esque squeak came through the speaker. "Yes, I'd love to!"

The younger woman breathed in the succulent, cool air of relief and let it sweep away the remnants of dusty anxiety within. Elated with the tickle of success, she began to feel a little more confident in the discussion. "Great!"

"You know, it's been a while, I was beginning to think that you changed your mind or something." At the end of the observation was an apprehensive excuse for a laugh trying to diffuse the meekness of Rapunzel's voice.

Elsa felt a pang of regret. "I know, I- I'm sorry, I just had to th-think."

Ever warm in the heart, Rapunzel assured "It's okay. I'm- I'm really glad you decided to call."

With a blush seeping into her cheeks like flowing lava, Elsa smiled. For her part, she was still unsure of how this would turn out. Her predicament still left her ambivalent. For this reason, she opted to push past that part of the conversation. "So, uh, how does- how does tomorrow sound?"

"Tomorrow," Rapunzel playfully mused aloud, "sounds perfect."

A bird of joy flew from Elsa's stomach into her heart. "Okay, I'll- I'll see you then." She hung up with what was probably rude timing, but it was also just about time to breathe once more. She looked around her room. She had a couple of hours before Anna got back. Classes were over, but Anna was off somewhere with Hans _. I'll get started on my schoolwork then tell her that Rapunzel is coming over tomorrow._

Elsa rubbed her temple and opened up her computer. All this back and forth was giving her a headache.

* * *

When Anna did get home, Elsa wasn't exactly sure how to broach the subject. They greeted with their usual hug, and, as expected, Anna was quick to ask how her sister's day was. Elsa decided that that was as good a time as any to bring up her call with Rapunzel.

The platinum blonde hugged her arms across her stomach. It felt very weird to prepare to tell this to Anna. "My day was good, I, um, I called Rapunzel."

"Oh, you did," she teased. "Is it for the reason I'm thinking? I hope it's for the reason I'm thinking."

Ever so quietly, the elder sister rebutted. "It w-was to invite her b-back over."

"For a date?"

Elsa nodded, unable to meet the cheery teal eyes before her. It felt like, in a way, she was securing her future away from Anna. She immediately began to doubt her decision and even thought about calling Rapunzel back and recanting her offer.

A giddy squawk interrupted her thoughts. Anna bounced in place and crushed her sister in a bear hug that would quite possibly strangle an actual bear. "Oh, Elsa, that's great! I'm so excited! When is it?"

"T-tomorrow."

"Ooh, that's soon, anxious to see her, eh?"

Elsa blushed. She supposed she was. After all, she wasn't entirely sure whether or not her heart was beating currently. Then again, that was for a plethora of reasons. "Yeah, I guess."

"What if Hans came over, too? It could be a double date, it'd be so much fun!"

That was not a good idea, no, no way. Elsa did _not_ want to meet her sister's boyfriend. In the back of her mind there was still a faint voice of denial that could survive so long as she didn't actually put a face to Hans. This would eradicate her hopes. _But Anna sounds go excited by the idea..._ "I- I don't think-"

"Please, Elsa?" Good lord Anna's begging was too much.

Unable to breathe past the bump in her neck, Elsa stomached her own desires. "Okay."

"Yay!" Anna grabbed Elsa's hands in her own and began to flail them around like limp noodles. "This'll be so much fun! I can't wait!"

Elsa forced a smile. This was going to be an absolute nightmare. "Yeah, it'll be g-great."

* * *

That night, as Elsa lay there trying to drift into dream land, her simplest solution to her pickle lollygagged into her mind. _If I tell Anna how I feel about her, she'll answer it for me. She'll either feel the same way or not, there aren't any other options._ Elsa suddenly wished she hadn't eaten any dinner, as the food was threatening to make a comeback. She wanted so much to just _tell_ her sister, but that was the most frightening thing in her life. That was worse than the outside, it made the terror of the entire world look like a little, happy bumblebee. She gulped, heart clenched in her chest. _Maybe I can do it._ She knew it was a stupidly unrealistic hope, but maybe she actually could do it.

Elsa was utterly restless the next day. She spent her time without Anna obsessing over how she should act, what she should wear, and how she was going to cope with having Rapunzel, Anna, _and_ Hans in the same room.

At least trying on different dresses was fun. Well, as close to fun as she could have. She'd try something on, test out multiple different shades of make up with it, decide it wasn't right, and repeat. Sometimes, she'd get caught up re-organizing her closet, arranging her dresses once by color, then by price, then by how recently she got them, and so on and so forth. Each time her closet was newly arranged, she'd smile slightly thinking about the hopeless mess that lay within Anna's closet. _Anything_ to keep her mind off things was good. For how slow of a day it was, it was quite a hectic day.

Feeling the onset of fatigue from her long day of decisions, Elsa tried a crimson dress on. It was simple but elegant. The entire gown was one piece of fabric, with a ribbon of the same color reaching around the waist, tied off so the dress would hug Elsa's torso and display her salacious curves. In contrast to her pallor, the article was quite intense. It flushed her face and chest with scarlet and would be very successful in disguising any impending blushes that Elsa would have throughout the night. In addition, the refracted light sparkled on her hair, gleaming with fire mirrored in the glint of her eye.

It was truly amazing what a dress could do. Elsa went from appearing scared and hesitant to bold and demanding of attention. The air of confidence leaking into her surroundings was almost palpable at first glance.

She stared herself down in the mirror. That illusion wasn't at all what she felt, though. She _wasn't_ confident, she _wasn't_ poised, or bold, or commanding, or anything like that. Elsa wasn't any of those things unless Anna was with her, and Anna was with someone else. Anna was with Hans, and Elsa was petrified of meeting the man.

Slumping her shoulders in defeat, the lonely woman undressed and racked her dress. She fought a lump in her throat as her heart bled the color of her denied garment. _Who am I kidding? I can't make that kind of impression, not alone._ Elsa was frightened at the core of her being. She couldn't even stand _near_ an open door, let alone take the stage in front of a stranger. That would be putting the eyes of the world on her, and she wasn't prepared to face those demons. She couldn't just best her illness like that, that's not how it worked. It was one thing to dress like that in front of Anna, but this was different. She didn't know Hans, she didn't like him, and she was too cowardly to face him.

Biting back the melancholy and anxiety itching at her chest, Elsa picked up a dress of a similar style but sporting one major difference: the color was nowhere near as riveting. Instead, it was a gentle pink. Soft on the eyes, not caring for attention but still masking any sort of blush she'd obtain. She put on the dress and sniffled. _I guess this one is okay, too._

She sat down and stared blankly at some power point slides on her bed to pass the time until her sister came home. _I hope Anna likes the dress._ That would make Elsa happy with her choice.

* * *

At long last, Anna pulled into the driveway. Elsa stood, collected herself, and went to meet her sister downstairs. Heart aloof with anticipation, she waited near the door with a grin on her face and a slightly nervous tick in her stomach. She was almost certain Anna would approve of her dress, but she was also pathetically desperate for that approval.

The door opened and Elsa stood straighter. "Hi, Anna," she said before the red head was even in view.

Anna stepped in as she cheerfully shot back "Hey, Elsa." She stopped when she saw her sister. There was a moment of silence, a pause in the air.

Elsa held her breath while teal eyes appraised her. Anna sure was taking her sweet time dragging her eyes up her sister's figure. "So," Elsa began timidly, "what do you think?"

"Oh, you look absolutely adorable! Is that what you're wearing tonight? Because _I_ think it's great."

Blushing yet emboldened by her love's statement, Elsa smiled and gave a little twirl in the dress, the hem of the skirt reaching up and fluttering in the air. "Yeah. Do you really think it looks that good?"

"Yes! And it twirls so nicely," Anna gushed.

That was what Elsa needed. She felt magnitudes better, letting Anna's compliment sit on her skin like a comforter. "Thank you. What are you gonna wear?"

"You know, I've been trying to decide all day, but now that I know you're wearing that, I think I know." The younger girl sounded thrilled.

Elsa couldn't help herself, her lips turned sharply up. "So, what is it?"

Anna summoned a lopsided grin. "That's a surprise. I'll go put it on because I know you're _dying_ to know." She turned to hike the stairs.

With a little giggle, Elsa said "okay."

Anna bit her lip and turned around. She winked at her sister. "No peaking." Then, she had vanished.

Elsa froze like a deer in headlights. Her heart did a back flip in her chest and ended up stunning her lungs. She felt electrified, neediness once again crowding her womanhood. Her memory of when they dressed up flashed into her mind, Anna shamelessly discarding her shirt, Elsa catching a peek at her bra. Was that what her sister had just referenced? It felt flirtatious. Elsa knew that it was most likely not in reference to that, but she couldn't help but feel like it had some sort of sexual undertone.

She sucked on her lower lip and briefly considered making a private excursion to her room. It had, after all, been a while since she pleasured herself. While the thought of doing such a thing while Anna was most likely half naked in the next room over exhilarated Elsa, she had to admit that she probably shouldn't. _After all, Anna won't take very long to change._ She huffed, already having to push away some rather carnal fantasies.

In no time, Anna was back. She practically jumped all the way down the stairs. She wore a white dress that was similar in style to Elsa's. Her signature pig tails stood out like a spotlight against the plain yet refined dress. Her freckles stood proud on her face, dancing on lightly dimpled cheeks as she smiled over at her sister. She spun, just like Elsa had done earlier, the dress riding up to just above her knees. "Nice, huh? We'll be so cute together!"

Elsa just stood, pupils dilated and heart grasping at straws in the wake of her sister. Butterflies sprouted from her gut. Anna managed to make anything look absolutely ravishing. "You look dazzling, Anna."

The bubbly girl zipped over to her sister, putting her arm around a thin waist. Elsa immediately melted into the contact, the fingers on her side eliciting goosebumps around her entire body as they gently brushed the fabric of her dress. Anna waved her hand in front of her as she spoke, as if to showcase an audience to Elsa. "No, _we_ look dazzling."

Flames licking her cheeks, Elsa looked down shyly. "Mostly you," she mumbled, not entirely intending Anna to hear.

"Oh, please, Elsa. You're at least half as gorgeous as me," Anna teased.

Elsa chuckled. "I'll take that as quite a compliment."

Anna beamed, transmitting some of her healthy self confidence as she stared at her sister. "Good, it was meant as one."

Elsa blushed and just grinned. After a moment, Anna spoke again, a little more tentatively this time. "Speaking of beautiful-"

A bad feeling swirled in Elsa's gut. She didn't know where this was going, but she was almost sure that Anna would tease her about Rapunzel or something like that. She prepared herself to over heat and braced for impact.

"-you should put your hair down again."

Instantly, the platinum blonde protectively grabbed her braid. She squeezed it, needing the familiar comfort. Hans was coming over tonight, a strange man that was stealing the girl that had won over Elsa's heart. Ripping her away, making memories of the past into bittersweet nothings. She _needed_ some familiarity, nothing was how it was before. Rapunzel was coming over for a second _date,_ Anna was inviting her _boyfriend._ Elsa simply couldn't handle it all without some kind of rock to keep her grounded. Usually, that rock was Anna, but tonight, her hair would be her last anchor. "N-no, I'd- I'd rather n-not."

A reassuring hand rested on Elsa's shoulder. "Are you sure? I know Rapunzel likes it down."

Stroking her own satin hair, the elder sister mumbled "I- I need it in the braid." She weekly looked up to meet aquamarine eyes.

Anna bit her lip, clearly assessing the situation and trying to worm her way into Elsa's head. Her brows were knitted together as she focused on putting herself in Elsa's shoes to see if she should push the point more. Finally, she spoke. "I understand."

Elsa felt a tide of emotion within her chest. _Of course Anna understands, she always understands._

With a little, loving smile the younger girl reached for her sister's braid. Elsa reluctantly let go and trusted Anna. Dainty fingers played with the thick, soft hair, twirling it and petting it like a kitten. "Besides," she said in an honest, low voice, "I like your braid."

Elsa just blushed and focused on the ground, letting Anna continue on with her hair. She felt so close to her sister in that moment, and all she desired was to be even closer. She let love flow freely from her heart as she tightly hugged Anna, sighing happily into the embrace. Her bright sunshine's hand began to subtly rub her back.

Soon enough, it was time to get ready. Elsa put some home made lasagna in the oven then touched up her eye shadow and lipstick. As the seconds passed by, Elsa's gut coiled farther, the spring-like tension stressing her entire body. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath in front of the mirror. _You can do this, conceal, don't feel. Hans is just a person. A person who Anna is with. A person who is stealing your happiness from you._ Shut eyes clammed up, forcing themselves closed even farther. Elsa stifled a noise of despair and opened her eyes once again. _Conceal._

Rapunzel texted. She'd be there in about half an hour. Elsa took the lasagna out of the oven to cool. Anna told her that Hans would be there in about fifteen minutes. Elsa's heart rate picked up, nervousness shrouding her sight.

Sure enough, just over a quarter of an hour later, the doorbell rang. The platinum blonde froze in place, dumbstruck by sheer terror. He was there. She was going to meet Hans, to put a face to her hatred. She didn't want to do that.

Anna squeezed Elsa's hand and squeaked in jubilation. "He's here!" She skipped over to the door. Elsa took a step back, towards the stairwell, ready to bolt and hide in her room like the scared little puppy she was. Before she opened the door, the red head turned to her sister and smiled reassuringly. "It's okay, Elsa, I know you'll get along."

Somehow, Elsa doubted that. Nonetheless, she gulped and nodded, unable to bring herself to utter any sort of verbal phrase. As the door opened, her world started spinning and she had to focus to not fall over in a dizzy daze. She barely held back vomit from a quite restless stomach and twitched towards her escape route.

In stepped a man who was sharply dressed in a gray suit, navy blue button down shirt, and navy blue slacks. From this angle, Elsa could confirm that he had stupid sideburns. She couldn't quite make out the details of his face from here, unable to decide if his eyes were gray and lifeless, pale green, or some weird shade of brown. His face was soft and appeared kind, and when he spoke, his voice was just as gentle. "Hey, you." It was directed at Anna, who had stepped right in to him.

Jealousy pumped through Elsa's veins like a drug and she narrowed her eyes. _Don't you dare touch Anna._ Unfortunately, her younger sister smiled endearingly and leaned in, bringing her face dangerously close to Hans's. "Hey," she said sweetly.

Elsa didn't want to watch. She was millimeters from running away and crying in her bed. Using the weapon of his lips, Hans shot her in the heart with a blunted arrow. It made her ache all over. She gripped a railing for support as her lungs failed her and eyes sizzled with tears.

Anna and her boyfriend's lips touched and the older of the sisters just about screamed. But she didn't. She remained mute.

Hans and Anna parted. The kiss was definitely not chaste. _Thank God that's over._ "Hans, this is Elsa, Elsa, Hans."

The man smiled and stepped towards the platinum blonde. His eyes betrayed brief approval of her look. She tried to hide the mental stink eye she was giving him. "I've heard so much about you, it's a pleasure to finally meet you." Hans stuck out his hand.

For some reason, Elsa grimaced at how friendly his voice was, it was almost sickly sweet. She glared at the outstretched hand. The air was too thick, it wasn't letting her talk or giving her a second to catch her breath. She felt like she was suffocating, exactly like when she used her goggles. Her breaths became haphazard.

A generous hand started Elsa when it patted her reassuringly on her back. She looked over to see her sister, eyes amicable and supportive. "It's okay, Elsa."

Such a simple token markedly influenced the platinum blonde's heart. Having the insurance of Anna behind her, Elsa regained autonomy over her faculties. She shakily said "s-sorry." She took the hand. Hans had a strong grip. "N-nice to meet you, t-too." Now _that_ was an outright lie.

"No worries."

Elsa just looked over to Anna. She didn't want to make conversation with Hans. Her sister was smiling radiantly at... Hans. Elsa sighed, finding herself desperately wishing that Rapunzel would arrive _now._

But her date did not simply materialize. Elsa found herself stuck between a rock and a hard place, helpless but to watch in utter tribulation as Hans flaunted the fact that he had stolen away her precious Anna.

"So, Elsa, Anna tells me you're taking courses online?"

The platinum blonde simply nodded. Anna filled in more gaps for her. "She's super smart. She's a math major and you should see her when she's doing math, it's like she just already knows the stuff, she barely has to study for it." Her sister sounded... proud, and Elsa found herself blushing. She hoped that her dress was doing its job of hiding that.

In just a mumble she rebutted "that's not true, I study."

Hans grinned. "A math major? What do you plan on doing out in the real world with your degree?"

Elsa wasn't sure if she was picking it up correctly, but there appeared to be some snarkyness in the man's tone. She immediately felt intensely self-conscious. She didn't know if Anna had told Hans about her condition, but she assumed she did, making it all the more likely that he had taken an intentional jab at her by adding "the real world" to his possibly sardonic comment. She looked at Anna, unsure of how to respond.

Like a saving grace, the red head's voice sang like a bird. "Who knows? I bet she can do all kinds of things with a math degree! I'm sure plenty of places would jump at the opportunity to hire someone who's as smart as Elsa." She shot her older sister a simple but supportive smile. Elsa just grinned at the floor, cheeks glowing hot again.

"Yes, I suppose you're right. Far be it from me, a simple business major, to _relegate_ such an _erudite_ student." Hans' tenor conveyed traces of acid. Elsa supposed that he was using less common words in an attempt to uplift himself in a mildly desperate display of trying to regain attention.

She looked to Anna, reading the younger girl's expression. Anna was biting her lip, clearly considering the situation. It was apparent from her face that she knew Hans was trying to let his Alpha male out in order to keep the atmosphere focused on him. _That's something she should consider about him_. Unwilling to feed the conflict, Elsa tried to disengage. "I have to use the restroom." She sent Anna an apologetic look.

Anna smiled gently back, distinctly catching Elsa's drift. The red head clearly didn't know on which side of the field to stand: by her sister or by her boyfriend, so she very cautiously remained neutral.

In front of the mirror, Elsa let loose the glare she wanted so much to unleash upon Hans. She breathed rapidly, trying to catch up on all the suffocating she had been doing and did her best to pull herself together. _Rapunzel will be here soon._ The thought was an odd mix of delight and nausea. She took a deep breath and returned to find Anna and Hans on the couch smooching.

Elsa forced back some quite persuasive tears and sat on the other end of the couch silently. Anna pulled away when she noticed her sister, face flushed and giggling nervously, and the platinum blonde felt something die inside of herself.

After just a few minutes of what Elsa considered to be very bland, very _painful_ conversing (or rather, on her part just nodding her head and holding her tongue mostly) who's only redeeming factors were the bright, jocular comments Anna peppered it with to smooth the mood, the doorbell rang. Not wanting to have any sort of time alone next to Hans, Elsa popped up fast as lightning. "I'll get it." She didn't even look back at her sister's expression as she shuffled away.

"Elsa-" she ignored it, though she did hear Hans say _something_ after her sister tried to speak up.

And there it was. The door knob. Elsa's breaths became irregular and her airway tightened. She shut her eyes tight as clams and tried to rally her impotent nerves, but to no avail. Her facial muscles pulled themselves every which way, leaving her a mess of a human being as she trembled before the portal to Rapunzel. She thought about calling for Anna to help, but for some reason decided she didn't want to. Hating herself, she feebly declared "c-come in."

The door opened and Rapunzel came in. She was smiling brightly, dressed in a shamrock green dress that did a phenomenal job at bringing out her sprightly eyes. Her upper chest, lightly dusted with freckles as it was, was proudly on display. She wore subtle, pink lipstick, a kind of skewed compliment to her sharp green attire, but it worked quite well. All in all, she looked quite cute in her outfit with her delightful smile. Elsa fancied the dress's color. _Green is Anna's favorite color._ She couldn't help but catch the contagious grin in front of her.

"Ooh, you look pretty, Elsa!"

The younger woman blushed wildly and clutched her hands together. Rapunzel's arrival was a like a fresh Fall breeze, blowing away the sickly, stagnant air in Elsa's lungs. She looked at the ground demurely. "Thank you." She then found the courage to look back up. "You look nice in that dress."

The new arrival smiled and let her cheeks paint red, a tiny, airy hum escaping her throat. She stepped forward and gave Elsa a light hug.

Elsa readily returned the embrace, letting the cordiality placate her coveting heart.  
She found herself comfortable in Rapunzel's arms, but it still didn't compare to how she swooned within Anna's.

"So, uh, is Hans here yet?"

Elsa grimaced at the name. She nodded. "They're on the couch."

"Then let's get this party started, shall we?"

Trying to look excited, the platinum blonde led her date to her sister.

"Rapunzel!" Anna jumped up, Hans slowly rising behind her. The older blonde and the youngest girl latched into a tight hug. It was obviously no more than a friendly action, but Elsa couldn't help the little pin prick in her heart.

"Ooh, you and Elsa are matching, that's adorable!"

Anna teleported to her sister and grabbed her hand. Elsa felt the familiar prickle of blood rushing to her face and Anna's touch grow a fuzzy feeling in her stomach like a blooming flower. "Why thank you," Anna curtsied playfully. "we try our best." She grinned at Elsa.

The platinum blonde's heart skipped a beat and she smiled.

With a mock-royalty accent, the long haired woman giggled. "Well you certainly do succeed."

Hans stepped forward. "It's nice to see you again, Rapunzel."

"Likewise, how are you, Hans?"

He looked happily at Anna. "I've been great."

Elsa narrowed her eyes at him. He had no right to look at _her_ Anna like that. A dangerous snake was perched around her heart, ready to bite any second. She analyzed Rapunzel and Hans' interaction.

Beaming at the couple, Rapunzel chirped "good!"

She, unfortunately, seemed quite genuine. Elsa frowned. _Am I the only one that doesn't like Hans?_

They all decided that it was just about time to eat, so Elsa went and prepared the table. She placed the lasagna in the middle, allowing for each participant to take their own portions. She waited for Anna to sit and immediately sat directly across from her and next to Rapunzel, putting Hans as geographically far away as possible. Though, he was still in sight, so that wasn't good.

Anna took the largest portion, making Elsa giggle inside. _Of course, she always eats so much._ Rapunzel generously sprinkled parmesan on her piece and Hans took a sizable slice and left it naked. Elsa took her own food but wasn't sure she'd be able to eat. Her stomach was far too busy tying knots to hold anything at the moment. Anna and Hans were sitting _right_ next to each other. Out of spite or a feeling of rejection, Elsa scooted a little closer to her date.

She looked at her sister. Anna took a bite that was far too large, getting some sauce on her lips and trying her darnedest to chew the massive ball of food in her mouth. She let out a satisfied "mmm," as she did so. Elsa smiled at the sound of contentment, happy that Anna liked her cuisine.

From next to her, Rapunzel grunted "Mm, mm, this is good. You never fail to impress, Elsa."

Elsa hid her blush behind her shoulders. "Thank you."

"Yes, this is marvelous." Hans sounded genuine for a moment. "Anna's told me how talented you are with cooking and you certainly live up to it. You must have a lot of practice." He was looking at her with his soft features.

The platinum blonde hadn't started eating, but now her food didn't look so good, anyway. She clenched her jaw, irrationally angry. She kept things civil for Anna's sake. "Thank you. Yes, I have plenty of practice." Elsa's shoulders sunk as she mused about it. _It's one of the many results of who I am..._ A gentle hand perched itself on her shoulder, causing her to jump in her seat. She glanced over to see Rapunzel looking comfortingly at her, a tiny curve tugging at her lips. Elsa silently thanked her. If nothing else, the sentiment's very existence bolstered her, but the fact that it was Rapunzel helped, too.

By force of habit, she glanced at her younger sister next. Anna gave her a reassuring smile and a look that she could read like an open book. It was like magic, Elsa was being comforted from across the table. The most miraculous part was that it actually helped a whole lot. Anna always helped.

The meal went on, Elsa ate slower than a snail pulling a tortoise and sat in silent agony as she watched the apple of her eye flirting with the bane of her existence. Anna would giggle, lean into Hans, peck him on the cheek, and that wasn't even the worst of it. The nadir for Elsa thus far was when Hans forked some food, and with a sweet grin fed it to Anna. Anna had turned beet red and accepted the offering, returning the favor in kind. They both chuckled and, once they had finish chewing, shared a quick kiss on the lips.

 _This is Hell._ Actually, it wasn't, because Elsa was sure she'd rather be burning in an eternal fire or forever thrown about in a terrible storm, suffering in the second circle of Dante's Inferno. _How appropriate,_ she brooded, _that the only circle I can recall is that of lust._ Not that Elsa considered her feelings for Anna as simply lust, she knew they weren't. She was aware of just how far she had fallen for her sister, but there was a parallel. She had eyes only for her sister while trying to form this- this whatever it was with Rapunzel. That, as far as she was concerned, stuck her right in with the adulterers and lustful. Elsa looked at her date. She was beautiful and quirky, so why was this so difficult? Her heart felt like it was split in two, stuck between endemic desire and what she knew was right to do. _Maybe_ _I should let Anna and Hans be happy, I should give Rapunzel a chance._

Elsa didn't know what to do, her question still wasn't answered.

* * *

Dinner was over. Elsa quickly excused herself. "I'll put away the dishes." She circled around and collected all the plates like a waiter. When she got to Hans, he waved his hand, then collected his own plate and the tray of lasagna.

"Let me help you with that." He stood.

Elsa had to choke back fury. Her stomach sank and froze. She just wanted to _get away_ from him. "No, th-that's okay-"

"I insist, it'd be quite rude of me to leave it all up to you."

Elsa frantically took stock of the room. Anna was beaming endearingly at her boyfriend and Rapunzel seemed to be on his side, too. With profound enmity, she relented. Even if being stuck with him _away_ from Anna or Rapunzel was a chilling thought that made her gag, she couldn't very well refuse and cause a ruckus. _That would upset Anna._ "Fine."

The walk to the kitchen felt like a death march.

The platinum blonde tried to just throw the dishes in the sink and bolt, but was stopped. Not physically, just by words. "Wait, why don't we wash them a bit? I'd like the chance to speak to you. You know, just get to know my girlfriend's sister better. You're important to her."

It was quite an innocuous request. Elsa scowled openly and turned on the sink, making no effort to start conversation. It was silent for a couple minutes and she began to feel the pressure around her increase.

"So what do you like to do for fun?"

In a grumble, Elsa curtly retorted "read."

"I enjoy a good book myself on occasion."

Again, the room fell silent, save the muffled voices of Anna and Rapunzel in the other room.

"Not much of a talker are you?"

Scrubbing with considerable force in an attempt to dispel her anger, Elsa jabbed "no." She could feel eyes in the side of her head. They pierced her, they made her feel self-conscious and she wasn't even sure they were there. When there was no reply for a moment, the sensation became too intense and she glanced at Hans. He _was_ looking at her, frowning slightly.

"Is that all you do? Read and cook? Surely there has to be something else?"

Something about the way he said that made Elsa's bones chill. She kept her attention off of it, so as to not appear so weak, and kept washing. She knew she didn't have the most eclectic life, but she liked to think it wasn't mundane.

Hans crossed his arms and leaned on the sink. "So _this_ is Anna's sister." He said it with a more than healthy does of judgment, like he disapproved of who Elsa was. She kept the lump in her throat in check and tried to steady her breathing. Every fiber of her being was telling her to get out of that room, telling her to hide and not face this fear. But she stayed, again, for her sister.

" _You're_ the one with- oh, what was that called again?"

Elsa stopped dead along with her heart. She lost the fork she was cleaning and it clattered loudly into the sink, but the noise didn't even register. She tried to breathe but couldn't. She felt like a scared sheep facing off a pack of wolves. She was about to yell for Anna, when Hans did first. "Everything's okay, I just dropped a dish, don't worry!" He turned back to Elsa expectantly. She met his eyes now, her vision blurry with the beginnings of tears. _He knows what he's doing._

When she didn't respond, he figuratively shoved her. "I can never remember the word, Anna's told me. Can you help me?"

Elsa gulped. It was painful. "I- I-"

"Come on, Elsa, it can't be _that_ hard to say."

Air became to run from her as the platinum blonde started hyperventilating. She was trapped with this strange, rude, prying, sadistic _stranger_ without her sister _or_ Rapunzel. She couldn't do this, she couldn't even run, her legs were rubber. "P-please s-s-stop."

"It's _just_ a word," he quipped.

But it wasn't just a word, not for Elsa. It was much more than that, it was her _life._ Everything she'd done for the past nearly five _years_ revolved centrally around what was now being deprecated by this glorified neanderthal. Unable to keep her spiteful anger at bay, Elsa spat "it's _not_ just a word." Her own voice was seething at the edges, tremulous as it was. "It's my _life,_ I have to _live_ with it every day."

"And yet," Hans mused to her, "you still can't even say it."

Elsa was about to explode. She was going to flatten the entire house, char any life forms in the vicinity and leave the charcoal remains to sizzle away. She could feel the boiling in her brain and the scalding steam pumping through her veins. _Stop, he's doing this on purpose. Don't let him win, don't let him egg you on. Stay. Calm._ Closing her eyes and taking several, long, purposeful breaths, Elsa managed her rage. She opened her eyes and glared daggers into him. "You don't know me."

Alas, he was made of some sort of metal, because the sharpened look appeared not to affect him. Instead, he smiled smugly. "Sure I do. You're the one who's so afraid of a word that you can't leave the house."

Despite him being a completely new development in her life, that struck a chord within Elsa. A tempestuous sensation pitted her stomach and let sorrow and self-loathing fill the hole. Against her best efforts, a tear rolled down an alabaster cheek and Elsa began to choke on the swab in her throat. It stung so much because, deep down, she thought he might be right. The only one who _didn't_ think so was Anna.

The thought of her sister gave Elsa a burst of bravery as Hans turned to walk away with a victorious grin. She knew that if she used it now, he'd win, that anything more from her would play into his game of- well, of whatever he was playing. He had the upper hand, she was the pawn and he was the guiding force.

She _knew_ all that, and she still couldn't help herself. She still had to defend her pride, what little of it she had. "Ag-agora- agoraphobic," she stuttered, nearly crying because _God_ that was her life and laying it on the line like that was hard. "I- I'm agoraphob-bic." She sniffled. _Why? Why couldn't I just let him walk away?_

With an entirely too grandiloquent and childish smirk, Hans uttered "yes, yes you are," and took his leave.

And as Elsa was left standing there, utterly defeated, she couldn't help but wonder just what the _fuck_ his problem was.

Elsa took a few moments to collect the disheveled remains of herself and slowly went to meet the rest of the group in the living room. As she drew nearer, her heart pounded harder, hitting her eardrums like a punch each time. Her stomach wretched the small amount of food it had and she pushed against the shadow of her fear.

When she arrived in the living room, the TV was on and their Wii was turned on for the first time in ages. Elsa had bought it to try and find something to keep her moving a little bit, but quickly began to neglect the machine. It had just been gathering dust for quite some time. She preferred reading to playing pretend sports.

"Elsa," Anna squealed, "we're gonna play bowling."

Rapunzel nodded vigorously in agreement, and Elsa couldn't bring herself to look at Hans. Either way, both her sister and date were excited for this, so she decided that it would be a pleasant evening activity. She forced a smile and joined them, sitting between Anna and Rapunzel on the couch.

They all chose their characters and began the game. Hans was up first and everyone watched as he took the stage. He flashed a confident grin and walked forward, impersonating a bowler with a little flick of his wrist at the end of his roll. The ball looked like it was going to marry the gutter, but curved away at the last second, knocking all ten pins down.

The room was met with loud cheering coming from Anna, which over powered Rapunzel's eager "nice!"

The red head jumped up, arms out and lunged headstrong into her boyfriend, collapsing in his arms and pressing her cheek to his chest in congratulations. Elsa couldn't look. Her heart continued bleeding for Anna and she wanted the night to be over.

Next, Elsa was up. She tentatively stood, feeling the power of brown, judging eyes on her back. She closed her eyes and tried her best to ignore it. When that didn't work, she glanced back at Anna, who gave her an ear-to-ear smile and double thumbs up. "You've got this, Elsa!"

"Knock 'em all dead!" Rapunzel chimed.

With their sentiments at heart, the platinum blonde focused on the screen. She walked forward and swung her arm, releasing the virtual bowling ball down the lane. It made a beeline for the side of the pin pyramid, knocking over just a few of its targets. Her ears burned in embarrassment and she tried to hide it.

Despite her less than worthy throw, she gained applause. She took another unsuccessful roll and finally it was time to sit back down. As Anna got up for her own turn, she smiled and patted her sister on the back. "Good job, Elsa." Her eyes glinted knowingly.

The look was so familiar that Elsa could never mistake it. Anna wasn't congratulating her on the throw, she was commending her for stepping a little outside of her comfort zone and sitting through this stressful double date. "Thank you," Elsa said to the ground, and took her seat.

Rapunzel beamed at her and gently interlaced their fingers. Elsa's heart skipped a beat and she looked over. Beautiful green eyes were trained adoringly on her, yet displayed a certain degree of nervousness along with such pink cheeks.

Elsa smiled and blushed back, gripping her date's hand. The green eyed girl was clearly uplifted by the simple action, as all the apprehension swimming in her eyes ran for the hills. Her freckles were almost masked by her blush, and her slightly dimpled cheeks were pinched with such a thrilled smile that it was contagious. Elsa found herself savoring the skin on skin contact and let her heart rise in her chest.

The game carried on. When Anna and Hans were both on the couch, she'd be cozied up to him, but while he was rolling, Anna would scoot closer to Elsa and lean lightly on her shoulder. Despite not leaning into or hugging Rapunzel at all, Elsa maintained the hand-holding when she could and tried to focus on that.

Every time Hans would go, Anna would display affection towards him, foaming the jealousy in Elsa's mouth each time. When this happened, she'd subconsciously tighten her grip on her date's hand, as if she was retaliating in some way. This sometimes earned an upturned brow from the older blonde or a quick inquiry as to whether she's okay or not.

And despite how bewildering and complex the tug of war was in her heart and how stumped she was at her situation, Elsa found pleasantry in _not_ interacting with Hans. That is, until about three quarters of the way through the game.

Hans remarked in a casual manner. "Elsa, you aren't showing very much affection to your girlfriend there."

And just like that, she couldn't think, breathe, talk, or move. Her body went into rigor and inured to stone. No one spoke for what felt like several minutes, letting the air stagnate and congeal around her. It was hot in that room, like too hot, like she was very suddenly sweating all over. Elsa swallowed around the thunder of her heart and her clotted neck.

Not even Anna knew what to say.

Thankfully, _someone_ finally mixed the air. "We're not- we- uh, eheh-"

"Hans," Anna chided in the background, "you know she's reserved."

Elsa was still stiff as a statue, mortified. She finally found the motor skills to release Rapunzel's hands and hug herself. It brought her right back to her question from earlier. _What are me and Rapunzel doing?_ She had hoped that the answer would come naturally, present itself like the North Star, but it didn't. She looked at Rapunzel, worried about what she'd see.

What she saw only worried her more: inquiry. Rapunzel didn't know either, and she was looking to Elsa for an answer, an answer Elsa didn't have.

The platinum blonde just wanted to sink into the couch, to hide and not be found. Maybe if she hid long enough, everyone would forget everything. Maybe things would go back to normal, Hans would be gone, Rapunzel wouldn't be her date, and Anna would find her. She'd have a grin on her face because nothing would be complicated any more.

She didn't have enough head space to pay attention to whether Hans sounded sarcastic or not. "I'm sorry, I thought you two were, you know, official."

Anna served as the hammer that would break the awkwardness. If such a thing was brittle, that is. Unfortunately, it seemed more like taffy and was there to stay. "Let's continue the game. I think I can beat you, Hans," she warned. She gave her sister a concerned look.

"Oh no no no, I've got this in the bag."

Anna's giggling was white noise. The rest of the game was intensely uncomfortable. Elsa couldn't find it in her to speak to, or even _look_ at Rapunzel. Hans seemed unperturbed by his gaffe and Anna was very clearly trying to lighten up the atmosphere.

* * *

Finally, _finally_ it was over. The game was ended, Hans won with his stupid smug, annoying little cocky face. Before anyone could do or say _anything,_ Elsa ran off, completely done with this wearisome night. She was cognizant of her sister's voice saying something, but she ignored it. She just wanted to sit in her room and brood, maybe by morning she'd have a clearer head. She even made it to her bedroom door before a friendly hand captured hers. "Elsa, we need to talk."

The voice brought terror down her spine and locusts to her stomach. It was soft, caring, and intimidating. She didn't turn around as she froze in place, tears at the ready.

"Elsa, please," Rapunzel begged.

The platinum blonde nodded, still unable to face her foe. She opened the door to her room and walked in, leaving the portal wide behind her. Rapunzel sighed and followed, shutting them inside. Elsa sat on the bed. Rapunzel sat down next to her silently. Elsa scooted away, Rapunzel sighed again.

The ensuing silence actually _hurt_. Like, physically.

"I don't know what to say so I guess I'll just be direct, okay?"

Elsa nodded slowly. "O-okay."

"Elsa, what _are_ we?"

 _That's the question, isn't it?_ Elsa thought about Anna. She was locked away in the cage of Hans, out of Elsa's reach. She couldn't have her. There was so much going on inside Elsa's head that she couldn't even pick out an emotion to feel. They would slip out of her grasp like soap before having any real impact on her. It was like being in a rainstorm with thunder, lightning, and wind, but never getting wet. Difficult as it was, she looked at Rapunzel. She was chewing her lip, an Anna quirk. "I- I don't know."

Rapunzel sounded like a child admitting to stealing from the cookie jar. "Do you _want_ us to be something?"

Shrugging and tickled by a tear rolling down her face, the younger woman dejectedly stated "I d-don't kn-know." She was startled at just how broken and weak her own voice sounded.

The green eyed girl thought for a moment. "I'm confused, Elsa. You invited me back over explicitly for a date, and now you're saying you don't know if you want _us._ On one hand I feel like you like me, but on the other, I'm not so sure."

More hastily than she thought she could think, Elsa quipped "I like you." A simple, meaningful statement that gave her an intense case of vertigo when said.

Rapunzel's demeanor shifted drastically. She went from doubtful in her steps to inspecting a mystery as the response she received flushed her cheeks. Elsa heard a deep inhale and breath and she wished she could do the same. "So then what's the problem? I like you, Elsa, I _really_ like you."

This made Elsa's ears burn right up into a crisp and nearly fall off. The words uplifted her spirit and tugged some air into her lungs. She smiled at the ground. But there was still the matter of what Rapunzel referred to as "the problem". The matter of Anna. "It's just," Elsa really didn't have many options here. Since her contact with people was extremely limited, if she said there's someone else, Rapunzel would literally have no one else to guess but Anna. She couldn't reveal that, could she? So, what did she tell her friend? Here was where the road forked, one way led to Rapunzel, the other offered a hope for Anna, but almost certain loneliness.

She was silent for too long, apparently, because a hand grabbed hers gently. Elsa started at the contact, but didn't fight it. "It's okay, I think I understand."

 _Oh no, does she know? She can't know, no way!_ The platinum blonde's stomach doubled over in pain at her increased blood pressure and she nearly screamed.

"It's your- your um, condition, isn't it?"

Normally, she would have felt anxious at the mention of her ailment, but Elsa was too relieved at the answer not being what she thought it might be to care. She breathed a much needed sigh. Rapunzel had given her the answer she needed, handed it over on a silver platter. All Elsa had to do was take it and lie with it. "Y-yes."

The hand on hers squeezed. "I understand this scares you, Elsa. But you're smart, you're braver than anyone else I know for just managing to survive every day-" the compliments began to tingle at the platinum blonde's cheeks, Rapunzel was bordering on fawning her. Elsa couldn't help the stupid little curve of her lips. "-and I think _we_ are worth a shot."

Elsa gulped. She thought that she might have just figured out the answer to her problem, and it was so simple she felt like the village idiot for not uncovering it sooner. Anna wasn't hers, Anna belonged to Hans. _Anna will never be mine._ She couldn't have Anna, but she could have Anna-like, and that might just be enough. Barely able to speak, she said "okay."

The older woman squealed and hugged her now _official_ girlfriend with a death grip, leaning purposefully in to her. "Oh, Elsa!" Elsa was so stunned by the sudden onset of such affection that she sat stark straight, a metal rod down her spine. Her eyes were wide.

Then, as quickly as it came, the touch left. Rapunzel sat with owl-eyes and a hanging jaw. "I'm sorry, was that too much too fast? I just- I just got excited and-"

As her girlfriend rambled apologetically, Elsa considered Anna and Hans. The way they kissed, the way they hugged all the time, and the copious amount of affection they showed each other. It made her head spin with jealousy and her eyes narrow in hatred. And maybe it there was misplaced reprisal in her actions, something deep down that wanted her sister to feel as jealous as she did, but Elsa fearlessly leaned forward, grabbing Rapunzel sternly by the shoulder and pressing their lips together.

There was a split second where there was no return, no volley of the action, but that subsided quickly as Rapunzel realized what was going on. A tender hand traced Elsa's jawline, sending a pleasant shudder and bumps all the way down her back and spiking between her legs. She reciprocated by cupping the back of Rapunzel's head in her hand. The lips on her own were soft and pleasant. Maybe more than pleasant, maybe wonderful, maybe incredible. They slid easily together, assertive but not controlling, teaching while not scolding. They tasted imprecisely of their dinner and Elsa found herself wanting _more._ The touch was electric and soothing, it stimulated her and made her want to collapse in a lifeless heap on the floor. She found herself wondering what Anna would feel like, what she'd taste like. If this was just a copy, what would the real thing be like?

Yes, Elsa sat there with Rapunzel, unaware of how long they kissed, uncaring of the passing time. She sat there and shared her very first kiss _ever_ with Rapunzel, and she liked it


	6. Time to Move On

Elsa just stood there. Rapunzel had just left and Hans before that, leaving her alone with Anna once again, who was standing right next to her by the front door. Elsa did her best to steady herself and turned as her sister rubbed her shoulder. "So," she said, "I take it it went well with Rapunzel?"

Elsa thought about the kiss her and her girlfriend shared and smiled at the floor. "Yeah," she admitted with a blush. She briefly considered telling Anna about the kiss, but something held her tongue. Maybe she wasn't as ready to make a choice as she thought.

Anna smiled. She was uncharacteristically quiet in the moment. Elsa expected her to jump and yell and spout all kinds of "I told you so's," but she didn't. She just steadied her hand on Elsa's shoulder and squeezed. Something deep within her watery blue eyes retreated and it showed in a minute melancholy twist of her smile. The expression was so minor that anyone else would have missed it, and even Elsa couldn't pinpoint what it meant or exactly what it _was._ "That's great, Elsa." Her voice still sounded buoyant.

"Thanks for um, for pushing me," the elder sister muttered, voiced encumbered by her still trying to work out the hints recently dropped by Anna's face.

"I knew it'd do you good." The attempt at a self satisfied tone was met at odds by the auburn haired girl's strange demeanor. There was no sarcastic bite, no playful wink or jab, nothing like that. Just... her. But not her. Anna apparently could tell she didn't look the part she was playing, because she yawned and carried on before Elsa could retort. "Well, I'm getting tired, goodnight, Elsa."

Pursing her lips briefly, Elsa toyed with the idea of prying. _Maybe she really is just tired. It has been a long night, after all._ That had to be it, right? That was the only explanation for why Anna wasn't literally hopping around and off the walls like a bouncy ball. "Goodnight, Anna."

Then, Anna walked off. There was no kiss on the cheek, no hug, no overt display of emotion, she was just... gone. That's when Elsa knew there was definitely something wrong. She began to wonder just how much of Anna she had given up that night. Elsa's stomach churned. She didn't like the feeling that was budding within.

 _A distraction, that's what I need._ Otherwise, sleep wasn't on the menu for that night. Luckily, Elsa had a lick of flame still lingering between her legs from her session with Rapunzel. Put that with her little moment of fantasy earlier that day, and she knew exactly what she was going to do. She bit her lip and waited to hear her sister's door shut upstairs. She then made her way to her own room, eyes already rolling shut as she conjured another expository scene in her mind.

Anna was likely slipping out of her own dress at this very moment. Oh, that prickled teasingly down Elsa's spine as she arched and discarded her own clothing. Before even climbing in to bed, she began to size her own breast. The gently curved, lavish mound felt softer than a silken robe under her palm, contrasted by the rapidly hardening nipple posed atop it.

Her breath hitched as she gave her own nipple a light pinch, then traced her aureola with her finger before her hand once again expressed itself on her chest. She clenched her teeth as she thought about the day Anna changed right in front of her, exposing a hint of a green bra. She wondered if Anna was wearing that same bra at that moment, or if she was in the lace one Elsa had spotted in her closet before.

 _Oh God._ An electrifying squiggle pinched her nerves, causing her to audibly gasp as Elsa turned the idea over in her head. Her sister's more modest bosom may very well be free at this moment. She could clearly imagine the unhindered motion of said breasts, how pellucid a satin nighty would be on her.

Elsa didn't even notice she was breathing loudly at this point, for her breaths were muted by her monstrous heartbeat and flustering fantasies. Her knees buckled with a stunning bout of indulgence and she found herself against her sheets.

Her free hand slithered up close to her naked womanhood and began to scrape the skin of her inner thigh, gliding across her arousal. She gently pressed against her vulva. It was hot, her hand felt like it had just been burned, but her body begged for more contact. She gave it what it asked for, running her finger just along her slit, then used her other hand to do the same.

Now coated with her own natural lubricant, Elsa let one hand go back to her chest and start playing roughly while she explored farther with the other.

The room was blistering, the sultry aura generated by Elsa accruing in the confining box. She couldn't keep track of where her skin ended and the flaming air began, but that didn't matter. Her breaths were ragged, back arched, and skin shining with the sweat of pleasure. She was faintly aware of her now audible moans and didn't have the presence of mind to pay attention to how loud they were.

For all Elsa knew, she could have been screaming.

She tried to replace the fantasy with one of Rapunzel, but her mind was down another track, chasing a fantasy about her sister and unwilling to brake. With her eyes closed, it was now _Anna_ who was tending to her breast, _Anna's_ hand was between her legs, nudging her now engorged clitoris hither and thither.

 _Anna_ was likely the next room, one, pathetic, paper-thin wall away, laying awake. She could almost certainly hear her older sister's self-indulgence, and that knowledge just shocked Elsa's spine like a bombshell. It actually _hurt_ a little bit, but at the same time felt _so good._ It was a volatile dichotomy wrestling in her, aching pleasure pitted at her core.

"Oh God," she panted, and gasps came out here and there and she moaned sharply and couldn't take in oxygen fast enough. She was bucking and sweating, and grabbing _everything_ in reach, the smarting sensation of tugging her own hair barely even registered and Elsa nearly popped her eyes because she was squeezing them so tight; and then, she couldn't move. Muscles clenching like vice grips forced out a cry that was obviously loud, even to her in her stupor, and nearly broke her hand between her thighs.

Elsa panted and tried to catch her breath, but it was just a step ahead of her. Her session did wonders to clear her mind, for at least a little while. Now, however, Elsa couldn't help but wonder, even before she could properly breathe or will herself to move, if she had just cheated on Rapunzel. Whether she had or not, Elsa knew what she felt like. She felt like she was cheating on _Anna_ by being with Rapunzel.

* * *

After finally getting some sleep, Elsa still didn't exactly feel rested the next day. It was Sunday morning now, and a strange one at that.

She woke up later than she normally did, apparently exhausted from everything that went down the previous night. Elsa grunted and rolled over, she had been up late and this was _still_ a little too early. Her eyes felt as heavy as boulders made of lead, and the sunshine glowing into her room was intrusive and burned a little.

Rolling over, she checked her phone and instantly perked up. This was the first time in a very long time that Elsa had woken up to a text message. Her heart skipped a beat as she read that it was from Rapunzel. With some difficulty, she grabbed her phone. The text read "hey, you!"

Despite being alone and it being a simple text, Elsa felt her face heat up and grinned. It felt good to wake up to such a thing. Sitting on the side of her bed now, she shot back "good morning."

Elsa nearly forgot that she was stark naked when she walked to her door. She caught herself, made herself decent, then wandered out. Anna would almost surely still be asleep, after all, it was around a quarter passed eight.

But that was another bizarre thing: Anna _was_ up and _already_ eating when Elsa got to the kitchen. The older sister froze in place, unsure of what to do or say after Anna's behavior last night. _I'm probably reading too much in to it._ It felt like forever ago. Her breath returned when her younger sister smiled and cheered "Elsa! Come eat with me." She was munching on some Cocoa Puffs.

That was the second thing that brightened Elsa's day. She smiled as brightly as the morning sun, heart swelling. It appeared as though things were back to normal. Once she took the previous night out of the equation, breakfast felt nice and natural. They laughed and joked, happy to just spend some time with each other.

This time, however, was interrupted. Footsteps snapped Elsa's attention and there she saw her father, walking towards the door. She was going to just sit and watch, petrified by the unexpected appearance. Usually by now he had vanished to somewhere, possibly work. Elsa didn't know, she never asked. Anna had other plans, apparently. "Good morning, dad."

Elsa's stomach started to rattle, but at least there was no arguing. _Yet._ He turned. "Hi, girls." Then, he made like he was going to leave once more.

"Wait, don't you wanna catch up with your _daughters_?" Elsa knew why her sister emphasized the familial relation, she remembered their previous conversation about their father. Both were sure that he was purposefully avoiding them, and now, Anna was seizing this rare opportunity to put that theory to the test. Elsa's stomach lurched, she could sense the upcoming conflict.

"I, uh, I don't have time, Anna."

Anna scoffed. She stood and advanced her position a little until she could reach Elsa's hands, which were becoming clammy as her breathing picked up. She knew that look, Anna was determined to get an answer out of him.

"Too busy? For your _family_? It's Sunday, the office isn't even _open_ on Sundays."

"Anna," Elsa begged, most likely cutting off the circulation to her sister's digits.

"It's not that, it's just-" the man's voice sounded stressed, now. The pressure Anna was applying was working, slowly cracking the barrier between them.

Elsa just wasn't sure she wanted to be around when that barrier blew, because _anything_ could come flying out, and she wasn't ready to be caught in a crossfire. She just gulped, closed her eyes, and did her best to steady her breathing.

"But that's exactly it," the younger girl interrupted. "You're avoiding us."

It wasn't a question, or a sentiment said with any sort of doubt or inquiry, it was simply a statement of fact. And Anna had said it with such unscientific bias that it nearly broke in the middle. Elsa suddenly felt like an idiot. She had known her sister hurt from how distant their father had become, but it was always masked by anger. Elsa had thought that Anna was mostly mad for her sake, but that wasn't completely true. Sure, Anna had even gotten furious and fuming on Elsa's behalf, but it was equally on her own behalf. It was driven by her own feelings, by her own heartache. Looking at simmering teal eyes that were on the very edge of tears and a trembling lip, this became _very_ apparent to Elsa.

All the times they had talked about it, every time it came up, Anna had hidden it. She had pushed her own needs aside for the sake of her older sister, and it wasn't until now, finally, close to five years later, that she slipped up. It at last became too much for Anna to shoulder and it slipped out of her control. Elsa choked down a lump in her throat. _How selfish have I been?_ She took a breath and even though it was mortifying to her, even though it felt like taking a lonely plunge into the abyss of the ocean where _anything_ could be waiting, she stood by her sister. Because Anna needed her. Elsa tried not to cry, but inevitably failed.

"No, I'm not-"

"Don't _lie_ to us!" Anna nearly shrieked. Elsa looked away and slammed her eyelids together to shield herself from the accusation spat. She couldn't help but look up at her father to check on his reaction to such a shout.

He looked... angry. But in juxtaposition to that, he looked like he was trying to distance himself, like he was mentally retreating for one reason or another. Elsa's eyes narrowed, sure he had hurt her in the past, but now she knew just how much he made _Anna_ suffer, and she suddenly wanted him to pay for that. Despite his eyes also glistening, she remained resentful. "Anna," he gritted, "be quiet."

"No!"

Elsa's fingers nearly broke from the vice grips enclosing them. She clenched her teeth and tried to ignore the fact that she began hyperventilating. Hopefully this would be over soon, because she was going to pass out.

"You don't understand-"

"Oh, I think I understand _perfectly_ well," was the venomous response. Anna's eyes were now narrowed, honed in like a predator on prey. Elsa's stomach sank, but she stayed, even if she feared it might kill her. "You don't even care about us, do you?" Anna's wrathful voice broke to somber in one quick action. It was hard to pinpoint the exact syllable that it happened on, but it definitely happened.

Brown eyes looked back. Their father's face twitched in several different directions simultaneously, making him look mad, scared, and pathetic all at once. It was a disorienting sight to see from someone like that. Someone who Elsa thought of as terrifying and built of cold, hard stone. Clearly, Anna had a jackhammer up her sleeve, able to break through his front. Without a word, he just vanished out the door.

"Oh, no you don't!" Anna started marching towards the portal, but her sister was still stiff in place. Elsa didn't ease her grip and the subsequent yank made Anna turn back around. She looked at Elsa, eyes softening, then back at the door. "Oh, Elsa," she opted to stay and grabbed her sister tightly and protectively.

Elsa instantly returned the embrace, crying softly into Anna's shoulder, something that she noticed was mirrored in her sister's actions. She let the warmth of Anna trap her exactly where she wanted to be, and everything felt exactly right.

"I'm so sorry I put you through that," came the vacillating voice.

And Elsa's heart immediately clenched. She pulled back just enough to look into big, sobbing teal eyes. She sniffled and ignored her knotted stomach. "N-no, I- I'm sorry."

Something did brighten in those eyes, they looked a little lighter. "For what?"

Elsa closed her eyes and hugged tightly again, the beating of their hearts aligning against each other's chest. "F-for being so selfish."

"Elsa," Anna insisted softly, "you weren't-"

"Y-yes, I was." She took a deep breath. Anna's hair smelled of a hint of sweat mixed in with gardenia and grapefruit. She hadn't showered that morning, but her shampoo's scent still lingered, and that didn't really matter. All that mattered right now was _apologizing._ "I- I was so caught up in what I f-felt like that I d-din't even notice how much d-dad was hurting you."

"Oh, Elsa," she repeated in a breath filled with so many emotions that it was jarring to the older girl. The hug constricted even more, and their bodies were practically fusing together at this point. "I love you so much."

With a gobbed up, molten excuse for a heart, Elsa hummed into the hug. The words were so needed in that moment, they were just the right thing to hear. "I love you, too," she affectionately stated. Then, they were silent in each other's arms. Nothing else had to be said, because it was all communicated through their embrace. Elsa briefly considered telling Anna bout what Hans did in the kitchen, but decided that Anna didn't need that kind of stress right now. So instead, she held it down and enjoyed the tender moment.

* * *

It was only a few days until Rapunzel came over again. During those days, Anna had notified Elsa that she very much enjoyed it when she dressed up for her. Of course, this wasn't exactly news, but it had never been explicitly stated before. This whirled Elsa's heart and had made her almost want to skip everywhere. As a result of her sister's admission, the elder was currently in a simple, cyan dress. It was afternoon, and the day Rapunzel was to come over.

If Elsa was being honest with herself, she was happy she didn't have to wait too long to see Rapunzel. After their kiss, she was admittedly a little anxious to see her girlfriend again, even if they had been texting. It was also a weeknight, so she was just coming over to watch a movie, and as it happens, Anna wasn't going to be out with Hans that evening.

Elsa didn't know whether to consider it a blessing or a curse that her sister would be around with them. On the one hand, she _always_ wanted to see Anna, it was a constant desire that she gladly satisfied perfunctorily. On the other hand, it was going to be taxing on both her heart and her mind to have Anna, the one she loved, and Rapunzel, her girlfriend, watching a movie with her.

Actually, come to think of it, Elsa wasn't sure if Anna was planning on staying and watching the flick with them or if she was going to retreat to her room to give the couple some space. _I should probably figure that out. Wait, does Rapunzel want her to watch with us, or not?_

The thought of watching a movie alone with Rapunzel (again) was more than a little nerve racking and frightening, but also exhilarating, given what they did last time they saw each other. Elsa found herself blushing and grinning, and she had to give herself a moment to catch her breath. _I'd better ask Anna._

Luckily for Elsa, her sister was right there on the couch with her, working on a paper. Anna's back was leaning against Elsa's right shoulder, her legs swung over the armrest, so the elder knew for a fact she hadn't seen the idiotic grin and blush that had just happened.

The warmth from the contact and gentle purr of Anna's breathing against Elsa made her feel cozy and secure, it made her stomach dance with her heart peacefully, and she'd never get over the faint tickle of auburn, silken locks dusting her cheek. "Anna," Elsa stated.

"Hm?" The hum was placid and contented. The younger girl turned her head to point her ear at her sister.

Elsa's heart rate intensified. "I was wondering, um, when Rapunzel comes over tonight..." She choked on her words, leaving much to be desired in the inquiry.

Anna shifted her entire body so she was facing Elsa. With quirked lips, she raised an eyebrow quite high, poking fun at what her sister does when she's intrigued. The look was so misplaced on Anna that Elsa couldn't help a little chortle. "What about when Rapunzel's over?"

Helped out by the light mood and fluffy atmosphere that Anna always brought with her, Elsa managed the question on her mind. "Well, are you gonna- are you gonna watch the movie with us?"

Lips twitched downward into a more serious, straighter line, the suspended brow dropped, and teal eyes evanesced slightly. Anna looked a little sad as she spoke. Despite this, her voice maintained the utmost sincerity. "If you don't want me to, I won't."

Quickly, Elsa spoke up. It was funny how easily her decision was made for her in that moment. Like flipping a coin for something and immediately knowing the more alluring outcome, not because of how the coin lands, but because of the pressure of making a decision _right_ then. "I- I do. I want you to."

The freckled face before Elsa lit up, and a pleasurable smile that made her heart sing quite loudly was produced on smooth, pink lips. Her hickory eyebrows softened. "Are you sure? Because I don't wanna intrude, I mean, I'd like to watch the movie with you, but it's not like-"

Elsa couldn't help it, she laughed out loud, feeling all tingly and warm inside. She _really_ loved her sister's habit of rambling. "Anna, I'm sure."

Anna seemed quite pleased with the answer and sported a wide grin. Her face even appeared the faintest bit red, though she always had a dash of scarlet on her face so Elsa tried to ignore it. "Great!" She gave her elder a quick hug, making Elsa's heart jump, then turned back to her computer. "I've gotta get this done, then."

* * *

"Agh, what should I wear? She'll be here soon!" Elsa paced her closet trying to think. All the dresses just didn't _feel_ right. There was always something wrong with what she wore, but she just couldn't put her finger on it. She wanted to look great for Rapunzel, but she didn't want to over-do it.

Anna giggled form behind her. Elsa spun and looked at her sister with a healthy dose of fake anger. "Elsa, she's just coming over to watch a movie, just wear something comfy."

"Comfy?" Elsa was dumbstruck by the idea of _not_ dressing up. Wasn't dressing up something she had to do every time she saw Rapunzel? After all, they were _girlfriends._ Her mouth hung open and eyes went blank as she processed the suggestion.

Another chuckle sounded in her ears, snapping her back just in time for her to see her sister playfully roll her eyes. "Oh, come on, Elsa, you _do_ know what comfy clothes are, right?"

Elsa almost had to knock the gears in her head back in place. "I, um, yes, but aren't I supposed to dress up?"

Anna smiled wide and shook her head fondly. "Do you think I dress up every time I see Hans? No, I don't, just for special things, like dates."

The platinum blonde's heart sank a little at the mention of Hans. She tried to float it again with thoughts of Rapunzel, but it didn't really work. Still, Anna did make a good point. That simplified this whole thing quite a lot. Elsa breathed a sigh of relief. "You're right, comfortable it is."

"Good, now get ready, she's gonna be here any minute." Anna pranced out. Elsa thought for a moment then did as Anna commanded. She changed from her dress into blue skinny jeans and a light blue t-shirt with no designs. Her hair was in her signature and beloved braid. She did, however, touch up her makeup. After all, she wanted to put at least some effort into her look for Rapunzel.

Just a few minutes later, right as Elsa was finished, the doorbell rang. She ran downstairs, heart wiggling with anticipation, and arrived just as Anna opened up the door.

Elsa examined what her girlfriend was dressed in. She wore a yellow, simple blouse and jeans. It looked marvelous on her, despite how informal it was. She also had clearly paid attention to prettying herself up a little bit, just like Elsa had, which made the platinum blonde very relieved. She let herself take a breath. _Comfy._ She smiled.

"Hey, Anna," Rapunzel said as she walked in. Her eyes quickly found Elsa standing away from the door and a smile spawned from ear to ear, eyes glowing like a spotlight. "Hey, Elsa!" She walked straight over, and Elsa found her legs moving her toward Rapunzel on their own accord. The door sounded shut in the background.

They embraced. It was tender and loose, yet conveyed admirable emotion. Her heart rate picked up. "Hi," she lamely responded.

Rapunzel pulled back and bit her lip, cheeks shaded cherry red. She leaned forward and Elsa immediately knew what was happening. She thought about when Anna greeted Hans, the kiss they shared. The memory stung unpleasantly, but the recollection of kissing Rapunzel the other night made her feel all jittery – in a good way.

Painfully cognizant of her sister's eyes on them, Elsa sloppily puckered her lips, the fledgling she was at such things. When their mouths met, it sent a spark through Elsa's spine and she reflexively leaned forward a tiny amount. She did, however, keep the kiss chaste and pulled away with a thundering heart. She didn't want to display _too_ much affection to Rapunzel while Anna was there. it felt wrong in the pit of her stomach.

When they parted, Elsa's face felt like it had been dunked in gasoline and lit on fire. She stole a quick glance at Anna. Her sister's mouth formed into a quick smile once she saw Elsa looking at her, and whatever she was displaying before that was banished too quickly to be caught. Elsa then turned back to Rapunzel and stammered at the ground "so, uh, do you- do you want anything to eat or- or drink or anything?"

She could hear her sister giggle and could _feel_ the eye roll.

Rapunzel hid her laugh with her fingers, cheeks also nice and rosy. "No, I'm okay, thank you Elsa."

"Um, okay. Well, um, shall we?" Without thinking, Elsa reached her hand out, offering it to her girlfriend. She realized that Anna was watching and had a passing impulse to retract said hand, but let it stay. Her stomach whirled. Walking this tightrope was already becoming dizzying.

With a pleasured curve of the lips, the oldest woman said "we shall," and clutched the outstretched hand. Elsa's palms were becoming sweltering already.

The three of them settled on the couch. By sheer habit, Elsa perched herself right next to her sister. Rapunzel luckily didn't seem to mind and blithely took the open spot on the other side of her girlfriend. Their hands remained interlocked and Anna graciously started the flick and sat back.

At first, Elsa was a little upset when her sister didn't huddle up onto her shoulder like normal. She longed for the contact and it made her feel a little empty inside when that need wasn't satisfied. _But Rapunzel's here,_ she reasoned. _That's who I'm supposed to be cuddling with, right?_

Apparently, Rapunzel could read minds, because she lightly tugged on Elsa's hand, bringing herself closer, resting a pleasant cheek on her shoulder. Elsa's heart beat into her lungs, making it way too hard to breathe. She should be awarded a metal for even keeping conscious. She felt almost rheumatic as she considered Anna's presence. She looked at her sister. Anna wore a small smile and her eyes even looked on with relish, but there was also something imponderable about the way she held her expression. Elsa wasn't sure what it was, but she knew she didn't like it.

Or did she?

The platinum blonde wrapped her arm around Rapunzel's shoulder, who subsequently purred in delight and began carefully rubbing Elsa's lower arm. The action built goosebumps all over her side and arm, and she very nearly shuddered. Her heart went from beating to just fidgeting as she breathed deeply. With the edge of her peripheral vision, she kept an eye on Anna. Maybe, if she saw that odd response again, she'd be able to place it.

There was a riposte from the red head. She scooted a little closer to Elsa. This jarred her heart back in to working, if only after skipping a few beats. Elsa didn't breathe once she came to her realization. _Anna's reacting to anything I do with Rapunzel._ Something just crawled through her gut. It felt a little like excitement, flattery, nervousness, and remorse all together.

Elsa tried her best to actually watch the movie, but she was so preoccupied by how she was feeling between the two women on the couch that she just couldn't. She was fairly percipient, so it didn't take her long to realize that Anna's reactions: the soft brushes, the small smiles when their eyes met, and so on, were out of jealousy. It was, after all, the only solution that fit. That, however, left the question of what kind of jealousy it was. Was it just that Anna was used to having her _sister_ all to herself, or was it something else, something more romantic?

This train of thought, of course, barreled down a bewildering and outright stressful path. The idea that Anna was jealous because of romantic interest tingled in Elsa's spine, it melted her insides and candy coated her heart. It was a thrilling idea to say the least, but she also had to remind herself that such a scenario was absolutely absurd. She wanted so much for it to not be crazy. _But it is._ Convincing herself to drop the idea was a ludicrously high hurdle for Elsa.

That's not even what was bothering her, either. That was just dust on the shelf, icing on the cake. What was truly plaguing her mind was that, even though she was sure that Anna's actions were not due to romantic attraction to her, Elsa was still doing things to get those reactions.

It felt wrong, she felt like a charlatan. After all, the movie was about half way over now, and she had kept up with her little game. Elsa was rubbing Rapunzel's back and leaning her cheek into flowery smelling, straight blonde locks of hair. They felt warm and soft upon her skin, and she really did delight in the feeling. Rapunzel's hand was resting peacefully on Elsa's knee. Anna had responded to such actions, just as Elsa had predicted. She was gently leaning on her sister, tenderly rubbing back and forth on a bone-white arm. Elsa absolutely relished in the touch, it felt like a drug, she felt like an addict.

 _Maybe I_ am _an addict._ Elsa frowned. _After all, at what lengths am I going to get these little displays of affection from Anna?_ She had to take in to account how badly her sister could be hurting. It wasn't like she actually knew what Anna was feeling, but Elsa just assumed the worst possible scenario. She imagined that it was damaging Anna in some way, somehow, even if that didn't make sense. She began to feel intensely ill with herself.

 _Then there's the matter of Rapunzel. How unfair am I being to her?_ She looked at her girlfriend. Her _girlfriend,_ who, at the moment, she was using to feel her _sister_ touch her. _What is wrong with me!?_ Elsa closed her eyes and held back tears. Her throat tightened and her breathing became more akin to silent wheezing. _I really am no better than an adulterer._ Elsa let the hot pressure under her eyes build as much as she could without actually crying.

That moment is when she decided how she'd feel better about herself, how she'd redeem her lowly behavior. _I'll let Anna be happy with Hans, I'll make myself happy with Rapunzel._ Her heart's only desire was to find all of her dreams with Anna, to make everything come true _for_ Anna. But Anna had found her own dreams in Hans, and as painful and impossible as it was for her, Elsa had to accept that. She had to let go.

_From now on, I'll devote myself to Rapunzel. No more using her. I'm hers, Anna is Hans's._

It was time to move on in life.


	7. A Lie is a Lie

It was much easier, Elsa decided, to give Rapunzel the attention she deserved when Anna wasn't around. It was the weekend now, and Anna and Hans were out at a movie. This, of course, didn't sit well with the older sister; however, at that very moment, she was alone with Rapunzel, which did an unsurprisingly adequate job at making her feel a whole lot better.

On top of that, Elsa was trying to distance herself from the latent sting of Anna being with Hans. She didn't _want_ to step away from her sister, but it was the only way she could imagine to give this whole thing a shot at working. She pushed the pain farther and farther down, kept telling herself that it didn't hurt, but it wasn't working. Until Rapunzel got there, Elsa had been curled up like a sickly person, and had felt about as good.

Now, however, Rapunzel _was_ there, and Elsa was largely distracted by her company. There were still moments where her mind would dilly-dally towards Anna, but she'd reprimand herself and force the thoughts out, disheartening as it may be. Moving on was easier said than done.

Thankfully, right at that instant, Elsa had something to distract herself. Her and Rapunzel were upstairs, in her room. Rapunzel was sat at the vanity and Elsa was working her skilled fingers through the woman's hair. She was putting it in quite a massive braid, pretty similar to her own. The sun-kissed blonde hair felt satiny against her skin, soft as anything, and quite delightful to run her digits through.

Elsa could see her girlfriend's face in the vanity mirror. Rapunzel had her eyes peacefully shut as she hummed and apparently enjoyed what Elsa was doing to her head. She started thinking of how many times Anna was in Rapunzel's exact spot, how many times the sisters had done this exact thing. It made Elsa smile, but she had to push the thoughts out of her mind for now. _This is Rapunzel's time, pay attention to her._ Her eyes assessed the full but not pudgy cheeks in the mirror, drifting to shiny, pink lips. They were so similar to Anna's, and turned up at the corners and Elsa had a very sudden urge to kiss them again. They looked so happy, so _inviting._ She felt fuzzy inside as she realized that she _could_ kiss them again.

Malachite eyes opened and locked with Elsa's. The younger woman continued to work but felt her cheeks flare up in scarlet and looked away quickly, an embarrassed grin on her face.

She could hear the amusement in Rapunzel's voice. "What?"

"Nothing," Elsa lied. _Wow_ that room was hot. She risked a glance back in the mirror. Rapunzel was still looking.

With a giggle, the older woman teased "oh, there's definitely _something_."

"No," Elsa played, dragging it out to indicate sarcasm.

With a smirk and a slightly red face, Rapunzel retorted "No, huh? Oh well, I guess you _must_ not be lying." She looked away in mock-disinterest, overtly struggling to keep her poise and not chuckle.

Elsa forced a victorious grin, but didn't feel it on the inside. She felt terrible very suddenly, once she heard the word "lying" dropped. Because, even if she hadn't outright lied to Rapunzel, she still felt like a liar. She most certainly hadn't told her girlfriend the whole truth. How could she? Saying it was a sensitive subject would be the understatement of the year. Elsa thought about her sister, and how last time she'd seen Rapunzel she _used_ her to get to _Anna._ So no, she hadn't _said_ any lies to Rapunzel, but she had most definitely lied using her actions. Even though she really did like Rapunzel, her motivations were dishonest at best.

 _But now I'm being better, I'm Rapunzel's now, I'm moving on from Anna._ She felt despicable in her stomach, and it made her want to curl up and cry. Her neck was tensed as she remorsefully pondered what she had done and what she was _doing._ She was pushing away _Anna. I love you so much, Anna, but it's for the best._ With some difficulty, she swallowed. She really, really didn't want to go through with this, but she had to. _It's the only way_.

Her hands had finished on autopilot and Rapunzel jumped up and checked her new hairdo out in the mirror. "I love it!" The braid swung behind her body as she spun. It was thick and luxurious. Rapunzel's beaming eyes dulled when they saw Elsa. "Hey," she said with trepidation, "are you okay?"

Elsa looked up. Her heart raced and her breaths became short and quick. She could feel the trembling of her whining stomach, and she _had_ to make it right. Maybe she was a little too solicitous, but she looked down and mumbled "what I was thinking when you saw me in the mirror-"

Rapunzel stepped forward, squeezing her girlfriend's hands in a much needed, supportive way. Elsa didn't look at her face. "Yeah?"

"Was that I- I want to kiss you again."

Freckled cheeks flushed as the older woman giggled almost like an excited school girl. She then smirked in quite an alluring fashion and made eye contact with Elsa. "Well," she pointed out, "you don't have to ask me before you do."

A shock wave pulsed through the platinum blonde's chest and she felt even her sternum start to boil under such a statement. She pressed her chin to her chest with a diffident grin and then looked back up. She didn't really have a verbal riposte, so she stepped forward, a little unsure of herself at first.

Rapunzel encouraged Elsa by also drawing in, and their lips lightly pressed together. Elsa sucked in a sharp breath once they made contact, her heart buzzing like a bee in her chest. She closed her eyes slowly and focused on her girlfriend's soft lips. Her back arched and she subconsciously pressed her body against Rapunzel's, who pushed back. Elsa felt her core grow hot as their bodies crushed one another, her breath taking a brief leave. A hand placed itself against her mid back, deploying a tingle that bounced up her spine and back down, making her shudder slightly into their kiss.

Anna wormed her way into Elsa's mind once again. How she wanted this to be _Anna_ , how she longed for the hand grasping her back to the her sister's, and how she might _actually_ melt if it were. _No, stop, you're kissing Rapunzel. You're_ actually _kissing Rapunzel, focus on_ her, _not Anna!_ Elsa managed to deny the fantasy about her sister through sheer willpower. She had to close her eyes tighter to fight away tears, but she did it.

A couple seconds later, she felt a wet, smooth tongue glide briefly along her upper lip. Elsa gasped into the kiss, eyes flapping open despite herself. When she gasped, however, it parted her lips, and Rapunzel took it as an invitation, because the tongue found its way into Elsa's mouth. It was intoxicating to a point, until it flat-lined her brain. Only a split second later, Elsa jumped back, heart pounding distressingly, and breaths deep and unfulfilling. Her mind was shot and she just _looked_ at Rapunzel with what she supposed was a face of utter shock. Their first kiss had lasted some time, but they hadn't used _tongue._

Rapunzel started panicking, eyes wide and apologetic, jaw bouncing as she frantically blabbered. "Elsa, I- I'm so sorry, I thought you wanted that, I just- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to push you, it's totally okay if you're not ready for that yet, I just thought, oh, God." Her face was the color of Anna's hair.

Elsa felt like she was going to over heat. She grabbed her braid protectively and looked off to the side. She didn't really know what to say, but she knew she had to say _something._ "It's okay," she whispered.

Rapunzel stepped towards her, blatantly doubting herself, and placed a hand on her shoulder. "Are you sure?" She sounded genuinely worried about Elsa's well-being.

The younger of the two gave a small nod and still didn't make eye contact. "Yes, I'm just- I'm just not ready." Deep down, she knew she wanted to move a little bit farther with Rapunzel, but she also wasn't ready to completely let go of Anna. She wondered if she _ever_ would be.

"I feel really bad for pushing you, we'll go at your pace, okay?"

Finally, Elsa was able to look into her girlfriend's eyes. Her irises really did look like emeralds, refracting the light in such a gemlike manner. The color was so rich, too, it was almost hypnotizing. "Don't feel bad, please?" She really needed Rapunzel not to feel down about her actions, because she cared about her. She didn't want Rapunzel to feel rejected.

Rapunzel pursed her lips. "Okay. But just, tell me if I ever do anything you're not comfortable with, okay?"

In those eyes was such candor that Elsa felt, for a moment, like she was talking to Anna. There was a kerfuffle in her heart between sweet elation at Rapunzel, and mournful gnawing at once again comparing her to Anna. The sentiment employed a slight upward curve at the right end of Elsa's mouth and her stomach fluttered. That moment of sincerity, the totality of how much care was inserted into the gesture and words, was when Elsa knew just how much she could trust Rapunzel. Sure, she already knew she could trust her _friend_ Rapunzel, but this was different. This was the first time that Elsa felt unconditionally safe with _only_ Rapunzel. Just barely talking, she agreed "I will, thank you."

Rapunzel smiled genuinely and traced a gentle finger over Elsa's forehead, brushing her bangs back. It tickled. "Okay. So, what do you wanna do now?"

Taking a deep breath to steady some edgy nerves abound, Elsa asked weakly "actually, can I tell you something?" She had to relieve the weight on her chest to someone, and Anna was out of the question because she was already dealing with _so much_ with their father. _Not to mention taking care of me..._

"Of course, you can tell me anything, Elsa."

There was that truthfulness again. Elsa exhaled finally. "It's about H-Hans." Elsa thought she would only ever tell Anna or no one about this, so the step she was taking felt kind of weird- but good.

Rapunzel sensed the seriousness in Elsa's voice and gently guided her so they were both sitting on the edge of the bed. Elsa clasped her hands in her lap and kept her eyes on them as Rapunzel spoke. "What about Hans?"

In a taciturn voice, Elsa spoke. She didn't know exactly why, but she felt like she was going to be judged for what she said. Perhaps it was because everyone seemed to like Hans, but either way, Elsa had some difficulty finding her voice. Her stomach rumbled aggressively in protest. She told Rapunzel about what happened in the kitchen the night of their double date, how Hans had hounded her about her ailment.

There were a few moments where Rapunzel just stared with her mouth slightly agape. Elsa recoiled into herself, hearing and feeling her heart thump in her temples. She shielded herself from the judgment she was sure she'd receive and let the achingly slow instant tick by. "Elsa, I'm... I'm so sorry." The older of the two looked at her girlfriend with apologetic eyes, as if atoning for Hans' actions. She then brought her girlfriend closer, allowing Elsa to rest her head on her shoulder.

Elsa took a ragged breath of relief. _Rapunzel's on my side._ She felt her heart swell and her stomach relax. Appreciative tears welled into her eyes alongside tears she had been avoiding. She finally was just able to _express_ herself about the whole incident _to_ someone. Rapunzel was there for her. Elsa clutched the woman tightly, returning the embrace, sucking in a stifled breath, and sniffling, feeling the intensity, humiliation, and hopelessness of the encounter with Hans pressuring her heart. It met at odds with the wonderful fondness tumbling around in her gut and made her core strain and flex as she gasped into the crook of a warm neck.

Rapunzel patted her back and held tightly, letting it all happen. "It's okay, Elsa," she whispered.

Balling now, the younger gushed "I- I was so s-scared! I wanted to leave b-but I couldn't and I d-didn't know what to do!"

"You did the right thing by telling me, Elsa," the other assured. "He _harassed_ you."

Elsa's jaw clenched as her eyes squinted to squeeze out more liquid. She sniffled and pressed her face farther into the crook of Rapunzel's neck, her body still convulsing.

"It's okay," the whisper licked into her ear softly, warm breath flushing down her neck as a hand comfortingly pet the back of her head. Elsa almost felt cosseted in that embrace. It was several more minutes until her wails calmed down and Rapunzel gently lifted herself away in order to meet Elsa's eyes. Elsa sniffled and wiped her face with her hands. "Have you told Anna about this?"

A contrite heart sank into Elsa's stomach. Her eyes followed and she gently shook her head.

"You have to tell her," Rapunzel said very seriously, yet in a blameless voice.

"No!" The platinum blonde swiftly snapped. When Rapunzel's brows knitted together in confusion, she explained. "S-she has a lot on her p-plate right now and I don't want to- I don't want to upset her even more."

Rapunzel touted her position. "Elsa, you know she deserves to know."

Maybe she did, maybe she didn't. Elsa just knew she didn't want to give her sister even more to worry about at the time. If she told Anna, it could stymie her happiness, it could be considered sabotage. Deserving to know about what happened as she was, Anna deserved _happiness_ above all else, and she was happy with Hans. _Right?_ Elsa turned the situation over in her mind. Rapunzel may be trying to disabuse her, but she was almost certain that Rapunzel was _wrong. I need to put Anna's happiness before myself._ She finally just mumbled "she deserves to be happy." Still, if Hans was that cruel to Elsa, what was he doing to Anna? The thought injected a weird combination of dread and anger into her. So, maybe Rapunzel was right. The thought of Anna being attacked in such a way made Elsa's blood boil. _But Anna_ looks _happy with him!_ Elsa felt like she was backed into a corner, she had no idea where to go, it made her feel altogether helpless.

Rapunzel pursed her lips. "Of course she deserves to be happy, but I'm sure she won't be happy with a man that hurts you so much."

 _Any man Anna's with will hurt me,_ Elsa brooded. She gargled a lump in her throat as her eyes once again welled, taking in a sharp breath through the nose. Her heart ached. "But she's happy with Hans."

"Only because she doesn't know what he did," the elder pointed out, a trace of frustration in her voice.

Elsa winced at the hint of anger, retiring farther into herself. Her heart worked over time in her throat with soft thuds that sounded like little knocks on her skull. She began to feel a little less safe with Rapunzel. "Just please don't tell her," she begged.

Rapunzel advanced a little, but kept her irritation partially encumbered. "Elsa, listen, you have to tell her, she has to know who she's with."

Squeezing her eyes shut like a child, the younger girl squeaked "n-no," in a half sob. Oxygen was becoming difficult to get a hold of, elusive as a vague memory. She felt the onset of panic and did her best to ease herself, but failed.

"Elsa, please, this is serious-"

"Stop!" The platinum blonde finally demanded in what was close to a yell. Suffocating on a swab lodged in her throat, she pleaded, "she can't know, not right now."

Rapunzel's mouth went in to a tight line. Elsa couldn't tell if she had given up or just realized how much she was distressing the platinum blonde, but she backed off. She sat back and sighed, running her hand through her bangs and said "fine." Though, it didn't exactly sound like she meant it.

Even so, it was a song of sweet relief for Elsa. Her lungs relaxed into an easier rhythm and her heart lowered back to where it was supposed to be. She took a moment to enjoy the supple air.

"But just keep in mind that she should know." Rapunzel's eyes were stern, like a schoolteacher scolding a misbehaving child.

Elsa gulped and nodded. At least it was over. She was pretty sure that her and Rapunzel had just had their first fight, and she didn't like it. Not at all. _I'll have to be better in the future._ She couldn't deny that Rapunzel made a good point. No, more like a _perfect_ point. Plus, _if_ Hans was actually abusing Anna like he was Elsa, then Anna _had_ to get out of that relationship now, and Elsa would make sure that he never even wanted to come near their house again. The platinum blonde felt immensely uncomfortable for a few moments, until her girlfriend once again spoke in a more gentle tone.

"Thank you for telling me. It means a lot that you trust me."

A little grin formed on Elsa's mouth at the truthful sentiment. _I haven't ruined things with Rapunzel._ Her heart fluttered in her chest pleasantly and chased away some of the ruins left there from just a few moments ago. "Thanks for listening," she shyly retorted.

A hand lightly caressed and cupped a pale cheek. Elsa internally and delectably shivered at the touch. "Anytime, Elsa. Really, any time you need to talk, I'm here." Rapunzel then lightly pecked her cheek and Elsa's heart jumped.

Elsa sported a nice and toasty blush and found herself smiling at green eyes. Now that Anna was around less, it felt wonderful to have such a handhold presented to her. "Thank you." Both girls smiled joyously at each other, but the lingering tension from their disagreement was undeniable.

"Now," Rapunzel teased, "let me do your hair."

Quick as lightning, dainty, moon-pale fingers wrapped around the hair in question, protecting it from the outside world like it was Elsa's source of life itself. Her eyes went wide and she sucked in an unsatisfying puff of air.

"Relax," the older girl assured, "I'm not getting rid of the braid, it'll still be there, I just wanna show you something cool."

Elsa was carefully complicit, slowly removing her hands, ready to rescind at any second. Her heart beat loudly and quickly as she struggled to let Rapunzel get to work on her hair.

* * *

"Anna," Elsa excitedly squawked as her sister entered the front door. It was the same evening, Rapunzel had gone home a little while before, and Elsa opted to stay up and wait for her sister. It was now nearly ten at night.

The red head smiled brightly as she walked in. The curvature of her lips made the older sister feel like a feather in a pleasant Fall breeze. "Hey, Elsa! Ooh, nice hair."

With a blush elucidating itself on her cheeks, the platinum blonde grinned shyly. Her heart tickled and she was overjoyed that she had listened to Rapunzel. "Watch this," she eagerly requested, reaching a hand up to her hair. The satin, blonde locks were wrapped up into a neat, tight, and rather regal looking bun. Elsa was replete with fondness of this new hairdo because it allowed her to keep her braid, in a way.

Smirking a little, Anna agreed. "What?"

Elsa firmly gripped the middle of her bun, finding the proper point with ease and gave it a hard tug, freeing her braid from its tangled up prison of poise and allowing it to swing freely in the open air once again. She smiled triumphantly at her sister.

Freckled cheeks crinkled with giggles. "Okay," Anna admitted with a nod of her head, "that was cool."

Elsa's ears burned. She simpered. "Thank you, Rapunzel taught it to me."

Just a miniscule twitch at the top left corner of Anna's mouth, nothing more. That's all it took for Elsa to realize that she had said something wrong. She felt an internal reprisal at Anna's action in her gut. It didn't sit well, it felt like she had just eaten a rock and it was sitting there, unmoving and _heavy. I just made Anna jealous, didn't I? Just by mentioning Rapunzel around her!_ This was a balancing act she surely couldn't keep up. _But I have to._

"That's great, Elsa." But then, Elsa found herself doubting everything, thinking that maybe she had imagined everything about Anna being jealous, because Anna was just _that_ good at leaving that fleeting moment in the dust and moving on with the conversation. She flawlessly and sarcastically poked "is that _all_ she taught you," as she playfully jabbed her sister in the ribs.

Elsa, already flustered by the situation, had to give her mind a moment to even catch up to the fact that Anna had said something. Then, she had to process _what_ Anna had said and everything that it implied. Her face and chest crackled with fires, she started awkwardly twirling the end of her hair on her finger, and looked away. Maybe, if she didn't make eye contact, Anna wouldn't tease her as much. _Now_ that _is a ridiculous thought._ Plus, Elsa _liked_ the teasing, it made her feel special, it made her feel closer to Anna. "Yes," she quickly and unconvincingly riposted.

"Sure," Anna drawled in an unconvinced manner.

"I'm telling the truth," Elsa practically squeaked as she physically hid behind her hair. The room was boiling and she didn't know if she loved the heat or hated the scorch.

"Elsa," the red head chided good-naturedly, "you might actually be the worst liar in the world."

Chortling, the elder of the two insisted "it's true!"

"Okay," the strawberry blonde skeptically relented in consummate sarcasm, "whatever you say," she said as she playfully batted a blonde braid like a cat with a string. Elsa was still smiling from ear to ear when her sister circled her arms around her. Her heart lifted approbatively, letting her suck in the sweet aroma of the auburn hair that was now pressing against her cheek. She let the touch from Anna irradiate her like the sun on a warm afternoon. She smiled and sighed into the hug. After all, she was just hugging her sister. _Right? It certainly isn't helping me move on._

After a few moments, Anna spoke, her mellifluous voice drifting softly into her sister's ear. "Elsa."

The only response the elder felt like producing was a purr, but that was enough.

Anna took breath and moved to look her sister in the eye. It was clear that she was being _very_ serious and Elsa immediately started panicking. Her overactive imagination went hard to work trying to make her have a heart attack, and it was working. Her biggest worry put all of the others in shadows. _Does she know?_

"I have a question," she stated as carefully as a cat on eggshells.

Entirely mortified about what she was about to enter into, Elsa asked "W-what is it?"

Anna bit her lip and knitted her brows together in thought. "I think we should sit down."

 _That_ didn't help at all! Elsa felt like she was tumbling in white water rapids, trying to grab on to any slippery surface nearby. She didn't even _realize_ as her sister guided her to the couch and sat her taffy surrounding her lungs was too thick to breathe.

Anna sighed, still chewing on her lip. She looked off to the side briefly, as if she was changing her mind about something, but then refocused on Elsa. She hesitated as long as humanly possible, and just as the tension in the room was about to snap Elsa's will, the younger girl spoke. "I want to stay up and wait for dad tonight."

Elsa simply stared in disbelief. She misheard, that must be it. "What?"

"I said," Anna stated with relative tenseness in her voice, "that I want to wait for dad tonight."

"Uh," Elsa drawled in an attempt to give her mind a few more moments to process this new information. But _wow_ her mind was working hard to filibuster. She blinked a few times as her heart thumped in her chest and stomach rustled discontentedly. "W-why?"

A warm hand grabbed Elsa's. "Because, it's been almost five years and I just- I just want an answer." Anna's voice cracked near the end and her eyes began to shine in the light of the living room, tears reflecting the lamp with their watery desperation. The sadness in her sister's eyes broke Elsa's heart.

Elsa gulped. To say she was terrified of the idea would be to say a mountain is an anthill. After all, confronting people wasn't her strong suit, she didn't even _have_ a suit for such a thing. It'd be a little like walking outside for her, and just the inkling of such a thing was enough to have her petrified. _But Anna wants to do this, do it for her. For Anna_.

Anna clasped both of her sister's hands tighter now. The suddenly unsteady breathing and tears in Elsa's eyes were enough of an answer for her. In a loving, assuring voice, she said "Elsa, you don't have to stay. I know it scares you and I know you hate it when me and dad argue."

Shutting her eyes so she could focus solely on producing a voice, the elder sister stammered "I-I want to h-help you."

Anna began to rub Elsa's arm and looked on softly. "Are you absolutely sure?"

Wiping a tear from her cheek and roughly inhaling and exhaling in an extended attempt at serenity that ultimately failed, Elsa nodded. "I w-want to be there for you."

Then, she was being hugged. It didn't feel like a normal hug between them, it felt.. needy. It felt like Anna was desperate, like Anna was the one that needed caring for, and like Elsa was giving that to her. It was tight, almost too tight, appreciative, and _loving._ Elsa wrapped her arms around her little sister. For the first time in a very long time, she was protecting Anna. Even if their voyage made her want to run and hide, made her want to lock herself in her room and whine until it was all over, she was going to be there for Anna.

For now _Elsa_ would protect _Anna._

Tingling, humid air washed over her back as her younger sister whispered to her, voice shaking. "Thank you, Elsa. I know how hard this is for you, I just- I love you."

And for a second, Elsa forgot about Rapunzel, she forgot that her life was complicated, and she forgot that she was _scared._ Because for that moment, Anna needed someone who wasn't scared. "I love you too, Anna." They held closer. It was time to wait.

* * *

Almost two hours had passed. It was nearing midnight. Elsa was stymied by drowsiness such that she could barely keep her eyes open. Anna was sitting by her, quiet but clearly working her mind. She was certainly fecund during that time, Elsa assumed she was going over how exactly she'd confront their father. That, however, was something that Elsa didn't want to know because she knew that'd make it more real, and that might make her run and hide.

Then, at long last, or rather _dreadfully_ , the door clicked.

Anna's ears perked up and she shook Elsa from her sleepy state. "He's here."

A split second of mental buffering later, the older sister was wide awake and flirting grievously with a panic attack. She grabbed Anna's hand for her own sake, mostly.

"He's here, Elsa, he's here, am I- are _we_ actually gonna do this?"

"Anna, c-calm down," Elsa pleaded, mostly because if Anna wasn't calm, then there was no chance _she'd_ stay calm and this whole thing would turn into even _more_ of a nightmare, if possible.

Not stopping to breathe, the red head insisted "okay, okay, I'm calm, I'm calm." She was actually visibly shaking. Elsa was sure she herself was, too, but she had to ignore that. _If Anna's not even brave enough to do this, how will I be? I can't even open a door! God, what have I gotten myself in to!?_ She tried to catch her lungs' rhythm, but couldn't, it was too irregular and they just _weren't_ moving. _I_ have _to be brave enough, for Anna._ She closed her eyes as her father stepped in.

"Elsa, you can go if you need to, okay?"

Gritting her teeth so hard that it hurt, the platinum blonde shook her head. "I'm staying."

This seemed to give Anna strength, because upon her next inhale she cocked her shoulders and stood up, still holding Elsa's hand, and eyes pointed sharply at their father. The man, she noticed, was staring almost blankly back. He certainly did not expect them to be up.

Elsa's hand felt positively squished, like a bug under a boot. "Hi dad," Anna began. The platinum blonde shrunk a little. She fought the urge to vomit as it began.

"Anna, Elsa, what are you two doing up?"

"Oh, just waiting to talk to our dad," Anna rebutted innocently, with a pinch of acid thrown in for good measure. _Anna,_ Elsa realized, _would be very,_ very _difficult to argue with. Not just because I'm in love with her, but because she's_ good _at standing her ground._

"That's nice, but I'm tired and I have a long day tomorrow." He started walking towards his bedroom.

"No!" Anna put her foot down literally _and_ figuratively, stomping the floor to accent her declaration, and halting the brown haired man with her powerful voice. "No more avoiding us."

"I'm just very busy, I'm not-"

"Oh, would you _stop_ with the lies already?" Anna stepped forward, yanking Elsa with her. The small distance they covered was enough for Elsa to feel the change in the air. It was stiffer now. "You're always tired, or busy, or late for something, you _never_ stop to ask us how our day went, just admit that you're purposefully avoiding us." Her voice was more pleading than angry now, wavering with the glimmer of new-found tears in her eye.

Though seeing her Anna so close to tears wretched Elsa's stomach and ripped at her heart, she had to brace for impact. Her sister was tugging at the floodgates, and from the look on their father's face, had just peeled them wide open. The room was soon to be a torrent of accusations and pent up emotions, Elsa's presentiment was sure of that. She felt her knees wobble.

"I'm too tired for this." Their father started walking.

Anna placed herself in his path, growling "no, you're not," and leaving her sister with no hand to hold. Being in such proximity to the action felt like pushing into the surface of the sun. It was too much for Elsa and she began to feel the ground grab her feet, it kept her still as the arguing ensured that she was too spineless to fight it.

"Anna," he agitatedly grumbled, trying to sidestep her.

She catty-cornered him, eyes narrowed. Elsa watched on fearfully, wishing, _hoping_ she'd get Anna's hand back. She needed something to hold on to when the water came to wash away their secrets.

"What do you want me to say," he questioned.

"All I want is the truth." Elsa decided that if she were in front of Anna's eyes right then, she'd be sliced right in two from the sharp, unforgiving look. "Why'd you _abandon_ us, why'd you abandon _Elsa_?"

"I did no such thing!"

Voices were beginning to be raised, and each decibel they increased closed one lobe of Elsa's lungs, placed one more rock atop her chest, and stole a single safe thought. Plus, they were now talking about _her,_ and she was adamantly not ready to have sights aimed at her. Elsa didn't want to do this any more, she wanted to give up and run away, but her legs weren't working. She hugged her arms to her stomach, like they'd hold her together.

"YES, you did! Ever since mom died you haven't helped her at all, you haven't paid _any_ attention to her agoraphobia! To her recovery!"

Elsa's world was spinning. She flashed back to the crash, to the roar of the vehicle sliding away, to the blood _everywhere,_ to the ringing in her ears, and worst of all, to the initial shock and agony of losing her mother. She had been bereft, she had _given up._ She thought about her illness, how dearly she wanted to leave the house, the remarkable, desirable, _normal_ life that she pined for.

"THAT'S NOT TRUE," their father roared. His voice was almost deafening, yet was barely audible over the beating of Elsa's heart and her struggle to keep breathing. "I paid for the goggles! I _pay_ for her food, give her a place to live, let her buy _anything_ she wants!"

Anna was shrieking like a madwoman now. It actually made little spiders crawl the length of Elsa's spine. "That's not the same! She needs a psychiatrist! She needs help! She needs her _father_!" Anna had thrown the conversation. She had chucked it directly at her sister, but not for malicious reasons, not to simply throw the spotlight, but to make sure _Elsa_ got the help she needed. She was ensuring that, if this worked, their father would be there for the elder, if nothing else. Anna was opting to keep living with her pain, if need be.

And it broke Elsa's heart. She nearly collapsed.

"A psychiatrist can't help because she doesn't _want_ help! Look at her! She hasn't made any progress in five _YEARS_!"

Elsa was actually huddled in on herself crying now. There was so much going on in her mind that it might as well have been empty. She couldn't think, they all happened to fast. She couldn't listen, there were too many noises, and she couldn't _take it._ Normality is almost _all_ she wanted. It was half of her key. Surprising herself and most likely Anna, she shouted in a shrill voice peppered with breaks and tremors. "I _do_ want to get b-better!" When she looked at her dad, she realized that he was crying, too.

He looked at her, and she instantly regretted speaking. Being put under his stare was like being put on an operating table. She felt hopeless. Yet in his voice, she heard a tinge of regret dancing with despair. "I'll pay for a psychiatrist when you prove that! I'll start caring when you make progress!"

Elsa was contented to just waste away right there. She had proof that her father didn't love her, she now knew what he thought of her. Not only did he see her as a failure, but also as a burden. He had long since given up, never even really _tried_. But what hurt most of all was the fact that he clearly _blamed_ her. After all, she was the one to beg her mother to go out, and there was no good reason but one for why he refused to pay for a psychiatrist to help. He blamed her for the accident and was making her pay. Perhaps she was thinking impetuously, but it hurt all the same.

"How do you know she hasn't made progress if you're never around?" Anna practically spat the question at him.

"I'm going to bed," he teethed, but he actually sounded a little distraught. It was like he _had_ to get out of there, not simply to avoid his daughters, but for his own mental well-being. It didn't fit, the equation didn't add up.

"Oh no you don't-"

"Out of my way, Anna." He actually physically shoved passed her, eyes on the ground, and all Elsa wanted to do was pass out.

"We're not done!" Anna chased after him, but he kept marching. "Dad," she said in no less of a stand-offish voice, "You can't hide from us! We're your family!" Even from where she was, Elsa could tell her sister's lip was trembling.

Then, something clicked in Elsa's mind. She wasn't sure exactly what set it off, but it must have been something in her father's body language. Her epiphany salted her eyes. "W-we miss mom, too," she said, just loud enough for him to hear.

This stopped the man in his tracks. His shoulders slumped and he let his gaze fall to the ground momentarily. A tear trickled down his cheek. The anguish in his eyes flooded the room with sickly air, and when he looked back up at Elsa, she thought that they might have _finally_ gotten somewhere.

But then, the grief in his eyes turned to rage. She had gotten nowhere. "Shut up! Don't talk about my wife like you understand, you DON'T understand!" he threatened in a biting voice. Then, he slammed the door to his room, separating them with a shield of wood.

Anna exploded. Her voice was high and shrill, nearly making Elsa's ears bleed as she yelled. "YOU are so selfish that you think YOU'RE the only one that's hurting!? Maybe it's GOOD that you're never around!" Anna paced in a quick circled and screeched "GAH," and banged once on the door to let some fury out. Elsa knew that her sister was just yelling to let off steam, but she wondered what kind of affect the words had on their father.

Blue eyes met with teal ones. Elsa had done it, she had braved the storm, she had stayed, she had even _argued_ a little. But most of all, she had been there to back up Anna. She liked to think she could stop and breathe now, but in reality, she couldn't do such a thing past the sobs escaping from her. Before she knew it, she was in warm, familiar, caring arms, crying on to a slender shoulder.

"I'm so sorry," Anna breathed, and it was easy to tell she was still letting her blood simmer back down and calming herself.

"F-for what?" Elsa sniffled and dug her fingernails into her sister's back.

"I put you all through all that and I failed, Elsa." Good God Anna sounded pathetic right then. Elsa wanted to make Anna feel better, she wanted to doctor the wound that their father left, just seeing it made her depressed.

Sucking on sparse oxygen, the older girl choked out "no, you d-didn't."

"Yes I did, he's still avoiding us!"

"But now at least we know why," was Elsa's dejected response. She looked into Anna's eyes as she analyzed what their father had said. _'I'll start caring when you make progress.'_ She could tell by the sympathetic crease on an otherwise flawless forehead that Anna reached the same conclusion as her: their father had given up on Elsa.

"I'll never give up on you, Elsa," Anna whispered in a tremulous voice.

Elsa's heart skipped a beat, she felt the warm prickle of her lovely sunshine start to break through the clouds and rain above her. It made her feel more relaxed, it made it easier not to give up. She lovingly looked into teal eyes. "I l-love you, Anna." How she wished those words carried the weight she wanted them to, but she had to relegate her meaning to simply a sisterly display. She belonged to Rapunzel, Anna belonged to Hans, and Elsa was sure that even though she'd never stop being in love with Anna, she could at least keep up her ruse.

Pink lips quirked upwards slightly and rich, large eyes softened. "I love you too, Elsa." They hugged once more, comforting each other for several minutes before they had calmed down enough to go to bed.

And now, Elsa was in her pajamas, in her bed, and Anna was leaning over and giving her a chaste goodnight kiss on the forehead. It was just like before Hans, just how Elsa wanted it to be. It was like back when her life was simpler, back when she could fantasize about her sister without guilt. But right now, she was struggling to not have impure thoughts, she was clamoring to be fair to Rapunzel, to not softly rub the spot she had been kissed, to not let the goosebumps trickle down her spine, to not sigh wistfully at the affection she was receiving. She was trying to be Anna's sister, and it was becoming difficult. "Goodnight, Elsa."

"Goodnight, Anna," she said with a little yet unsure smile.

And when she was alone, her mind began to overwork itself. She started thinking about their standoff with their dad, and was trying to get herself to actually move on from Anna. But neither of those things were getting Elsa anywhere. She was far from sleep, couldn't even see it in the horizon, and she had one idea to help get her mind off of things. She took out her phone and started a text message to her girlfriend. "Me and Anna just got in a fight with our dad," she typed, "can you call me?"

Elsa sat back and waited for a response. Talking about it to Rapunzel would ease her mind on the subject, and distract her from her from her struggle with her feelings for Anna. Rapunzel would be her escape tonight.

* * *

A couple days later, Elsa found herself hiding in her room while Hans and Anna hung out downstairs. In an attempt to keep her heart from being prodded every time she heart her sister laugh or stabbed every time she suspected they were kissing, she was texting Rapunzel. Not that she could really hear anything, just particularly loud laughs and such things. Every time she heard the deep, annoyingly smooth voice creep into her walls, her stomach churned. Even just _hearing_ him put her on edge.

Luckily, Rapunzel was a decent distraction. Every couple minutes, Elsa's phone would vibrate, and she'd be able to smile and read the text, rather than frown and tempestuously curl up on her bed. They weren't talking about anything in particular, but their messages seemed to be flirtatious. Elsa wasn't exactly sure, she wasn't the best at flirting anyway, especially over text message, but there were definitely some mildly coy remarks thrown about. It made her blush quite furiously sometimes.

Then, there were voices coming up the stairs, joined by footsteps. Elsa began to panic as they came closer to her door, freezing mid-massage. _Are they going to knock? Don't knock, don't knock, don't knock!_ To her great relief, the disembodied footsteps faded and a distant thud marked the closing of Anna's room door. The talking continued, Elsa could almost make out the words, and definitely could make out the tone.

Anna didn't sound happy, she sounded... upset. Elsa furrowed her brow. Her heart sank at the same time that little butterflies lit up her stomach. She certainly did not like to hear Anna upset, but it meant something could be happening. Even though she knew it was selfish and a slim chance, Elsa hoped that Anna and Hans were breaking up. She placed her ear against the wall to listen.

Her sister's voice came first. "-then he said that she's not making progress and that she doesn't even _want_ to get better." Elsa could hear the quakes in the feathery voice. Her heart clenched in a cold, iron fist. They were talking about _her._

"Well," Hans said, causing Elsa's eyes to unconsciously narrow, "think about it for a minute."

"About what?"

"About what your dad said. I mean, just consider where he's coming from for a moment."

The eavesdropping woman had half a mind to barge through the wall and slap him in his little, pretty face. She was entirely taken aback at such a comment, and her blood began to slowly simmer.

"Hans!" Anna sounded irked, too. Elsa's mouth crooked upwards, heart swelling with pride. _She's on my side._ "How could you say that!?"

"Hey, hey, just think about it, okay?" Elsa could totally imagine her sister's face in that moment, how mad, galled, and defensive she probably was. It made her love her even more, if possible. "I mean, _has_ she made any progress?"

"Well, I mean, not really, but-"

"See," Hans interrupted.

Elsa's heart died. Anna had been _lying_ to her. Every time she'd said that Elsa was doing well, that she _was_ making progress, it had been a flat out _lie._ It made Elsa wonder what else Anna had been less than truthful about. Was she truthful when she said she was proud, was she lying about always being there for Elsa, no matter what? The platinum blonde's stomach wretched as she thought about what Anna had told her right after their fight with their father: _"I'll never give up on you, Elsa."_ She was going to be sick, she wanted to scream, to yell and cry and have someone _hold_ her and tell her the _truth._ Her vision was blurry, her heart ached like a broken bone, and her stomach wept. She felt crushed, like a witch under rocks, like a slug under a boot, she felt worthless. She felt _betrayed_. Anna _lied._

Maybe she was wrong about what Anna saw when she looked at her. Maybe Anna didn't see hope, maybe Anna saw what everyone else saw: a failure. The argument had carried on without the aid of Elsa's perusing ear. She tuned back in in time to hear Hans say something. She had missed a little bit.

"But it's been five years, if she hasn't shown any improvement, she's not going to."

"That's not true," Anna objected, voice a little indignant.

Hans's tenor was softer now, like he was cradling her. "Agoraphobia is very difficult to overcome. Who wouldn't be scared to undertake such a thing?"

The recall was silence for a few moments. Elsa didn't like that silence, whatever Hans had said while she was busy trying not to die from the knife stuck in her back had apparently worked. Anna only ever paused for this long when she was _really_ considering something. Finally, the telling silence was put aside. Unfortunately for Elsa, even if she was bullet proof, which she was far from, what she heard would demolish her. "Maybe you're right-" Creaking and rustling hedged the comment, so Elsa couldn't hear the rest of what Anna said. It must have been Hans sitting down or adjusting on the edge of the bed, but that didn't matter.

Elsa couldn't listen any more, she tore her ear away from the thin wall and collapsed to the ground, gasping in the fetal position. She stifled her cries so that no one would hear, she let her heart get split violently and quickly asunder by the claw of Anna's revelation. She howled into her throat like a wounded animal, biting her tongue to keep it from becoming unruly.

Right where Anna had been, in the most special place in Elsa's heart, was emptiness. She felt hollow, and she needed that space to be filled, _now._ Was Anna giving up on her? Everything she knew about her sister screamed no, but the recent discovery of the lying that had been going on said _yes._ She bawled on the floor, spewing tears like a fountain and thought of Rapunzel. She wanted _Rapunzel_ to be there right then.

Maybe moving on wouldn't be as difficult as Elsa first thought.


	8. Can't Compare

As soon as she was able, Elsa fumbled to her phone and called Rapunzel. Anna was still in her room with Hans, and Elsa _knew_ that her girlfriend was near her phone because they had _just_ been texting. That is, until Elsa began eavesdropping on her sister.

It didn't even finish the second ring. "Elsa, hey," came the convivial greeting.

"R-Rapunzel, I- I need you," the white-blonde haired girl gasped through a wet throat. She wanted to pull out the figurative knife that Anna had sunk into her back and through her heart, but it was punishing. The pain was already unbearable, so why agitate the wound? The malady born of Anna's actions necrosed a once filled and loving heart.

"Elsa, what happened? Are you okay?"

Only a pittance of thought was needed to answer that question. "No," she whined through bridled outcries of pain. She didn't want _Anna_ to hear. For the first time in her life, Elsa didn't _want_ Anna near her. And if Anna heard her cries, she'd definitely come. Her eyes burned and chest ached from the heaving.

Rapunzel didn't need any more information, that one simple word was enough for her to drop whatever she was doing. "Elsa, I'm on my way over, okay? You're gonna be okay."

 _She's been nothing but perfect to me._ Elsa had an emptiness in her being that had to be filled by _someone_. _Maybe now I can return the favor._ Still, even after being betrayed as she had been, Elsa felt the lingering sting of loss when she imagined life without Anna. But the stunt that had been pulled on her felt far worse. "Okay," she sobbed and sniffled.

"Do you want me to stay on the line?"

"Y-yes."

"Okay, I'm leaving now, I'll be there soon. It'll be okay, Elsa."

Elsa's face was becoming sore from contorting in despair. Her nose was running, and her lungs felt like they were teetering on the edge of collapsing. Rapunzel's voice reminded Elsa of when Anna would comfort her. _But Anna was lying all those times!_ Elsa began to fall the wrong way on her balance beam and her thoughts were harder to keep in order. But as her girlfriend kept repeating comforts, Elsa began to believe them more and more, and eventually, even began to calm down. Rapunzel wasn't leading Elsa astray, she didn't even know what _happened,_ she was just making sure that her girlfriend didn't shut down completely. Elsa _knew_ that, and she _needed_ that. But she also needed the truth. "Thank you," she shuddered.

"Of course," the older woman fondly assured.

Over the next stretch of time, which, to Elsa felt like nearly an hour, not much was said. Rapunzel was simply _there_ for Elsa, and Elsa writhed in pain and just appreciated the safety net she had. Every couple minutes, Rapunzel would say something to the effect of "hang in there, Elsa," or "I'm almost there."

Then, finally, came a string of words that Elsa had been dying to hear. "I'm here, Elsa, are you okay?"

Elsa ignored the question because no, she wasn't okay, and she wasn't quite sure how to say that again. She looked at her door, thinking of going down and opening the front door for Rapunzel, but even her bedroom door was so daunting, so intimidating that it felt like she was staring into the eyes of Medusa. She was petrified in stone. If she left her room, she might run into Hans, or worse, _Anna_. Defeatedly, she cried a little into the phone and wiped her eyes. "J-just come in. I'm- I'm in my room."

"Okay," Rapunzel said as Elsa heard the muffled slam of a car door in the background. A door sounded and some footsteps, and Rapunzel poked her head into Elsa's room. She must have seen what a sniveling mess the younger was, because she gasped "Elsa!" and rocketed inside the bedroom.

"Rapunzel," Elsa gasped and clutched on to the woman. The hug was warm and tight, it was affectionate. But it didn't feel safe. It didn't help Elsa's open wound, it didn't calm her down, or get her mind off of what Anna said. It still didn't feel like Anna's hugs used to. Still, maybe talking would help.

"Elsa, are you okay? What in the world happened? What can I do?"

The younger woman's heart stopped momentarily. She looked at the shared wall. "It's A-Anna,"

she said in a hushed voice, making it clear that she didn't want them to be heard.

Rapunzel's eyes were so stressed that they looked like they were going to pop a vessel if she didn't figure out what was going on soon. She outwardly tried to look calm, probably in order to make Elsa feel safer, but it was clear looking through her eyes that she was panicking on the inside and was struggling with her veneer. "What happened? Is Anna all right?" She asked quietly but earnestly.

Elsa's heart pounded into her throat, and her breaths were too hard to take, so she didn't. She didn't want to keep Rapunzel guessing any longer. "S-she's been l-lying to me."

Rapunzel's brow furrowed. She looked like she couldn't decide how to react, as her facial features became incongruous. Evidently, she could tell that it was not a small lie, but then again, even an emotional dunce could tell that by how Elsa was behaving. "What? What'd she lie about?" Her hands gently enclosed Elsa's, and she held them tightly.

"About-" The blue-eyed girl had to stop, close her eyes, and take a few breaths. The crying of the infantile memory was still loud in her ears. "About me," she looked down shamefully, humiliated by ever thinking that she was healing, that she would improve. "G-getting better."

Her girlfriend looked intensely sympathetic, like hearing that broke her heart a little, too. She was silent for a moment, and Elsa could almost see the scales weighing options over her head. "Did she tell you that she was lying?"

Not wanting to continue looking up, Elsa shook her head.

Treading carefully, Rapunzel pressed on. "Then how do you know?"

With remorse hanging from her features like lead, the platinum blonde remained silent, but looked over to the shared wall. In the creeping silence, she could still hear the muffled voices of Hans and Anna. Then she just breathed "I overheard her talking to H-Hans."

Rapunzel looked at the wall, too. After a short time, she turned to Elsa, a blank thought bubble hovering about her head. Finally, she just sighed and with one hand grabbed the back of Elsa's head gently, and with the other pulled her into a hug.

With this, Elsa's tears were refreshed, and she found the fabric of her girlfriend's shirt to be the best tissue in reach. From Rapunzel's actions, Elsa knew she could talk more, she knew she wanted to. Her voice was broken with her sobs, and a little rushed between her breaths. "And-and I don't know what else she w-was lying about. W-what if she thinks I'm a f-failure?" Elsa's eyes felt like they were resting on sandpaper, it stung. Her nails were digging into Rapunzel's back, but she didn't seem to care.

"Oh, Elsa," she said in an elegiac voice. "She loves you," and hand began to rub her back up and down. "Of course she doesn't think that. I'm sure she was just encouraging you, she just wanted to help."

Elsa's heart floundered for oxygen. "L-lying doesn't help! She toldme that I was making progress!" She flinched at how loud her voice had gotten, she had to keep it in check, lest Anna hear.

"Elsa-"

"I j-just wanted the truth."

This seemed to stop Rapunzel from farther insistence as she considered it. Elsa found herself looking into deep, malachite eyes. Thick lips were kept in a diligent line. Her voice didn't push, but certainly asserted its position. "It was wrong for her to lie to you, but she didn't do it to hurt you. I think she thought it was the right thing to do."

Elsa saw her girlfriend's point, she really did. But it was hard to look at at the moment. On top of that, Anna had said that she was telling the truth many times before. So, with to the myriad of doubts the whole situation left in Elsa's mind, Rapunzel's point produced one question. "W-when would lying to me be the right thing to do?"

Rapunzel just looked upon her with a sympathetic and pained expression. She simply shrugged her shoulders and said "I don't know. I think you need to talk to her about that."

Elsa didn't respond to that, really. She didn't want to talk to Anna, she didn't want to face any of her demons, and now that was one of them. So, instead of answering, she just buried her face in the crook of Rapunzel's neck and shuddered.

Expertly, the older woman gleaned Elsa into a comforting embrace. The fingers lightly trailing through her hair slowed down the platinum blonde girl's breathing, and the arm wrapped around her back kept her heart in place. "It's okay, Elsa."

Having gotten everything off her chest, Elsa was content to just stay silent in their embrace, and that's exactly what she did. Rapunzel apparently understood, because she didn't make a move to leave, she kept holding her, kept carrying the weight for her girlfriend.

Soon enough, it was time for bed. Elsa wasn't exactly tired, but she knew she had to sleep. She pulled away from Rapunzel. A little more even now, but still not better, she said "I, um, I think I need to go to bed now."

With a miniature smile, the older woman nodded. "Sure, it's getting a little late, so I should be going- that is, if you're okay?"

With a gentle surge in her heart, Elsa actually smiled a little bit. Just a pinch at the corners of her mouth, but it was still a smile. "Y-yeah. I feel a lot better now." The initial shock had passed, and though Elsa was still sore from the blow, she at least wasn't crying her eyes out.

Still halfway in the hug, Rapunzel rubbed Elsa's arm and sent a caring grin back. "I'm here for you, Elsa, anything you need."

They shared an intense eye contact, standing in the middle of Elsa's room, and she didn't feel like verbally responding. Instead, she leaned in and pressed her lips against Rapunzel's slowly, who reciprocated with equal intensity. Elsa thought for a moment, then parted her lips as her heart beat faster and faster. There was about a second of hesitation, but then a tongue found it's way into Elsa's mouth. An electric bolt ran down her spine, arching her back and pushing out a tiny, almost imperceptible moan. She felt her womanhood grow needy and heated as they continued. She didn't really know _how_ to do this, so she just used her own tongue rub against Rapunzel's, a sort of mirror in the actions. A pair of hands started exploring her back, lighting up each and every spot they touched. There were so many sensations running through her body that Elsa couldn't even keep up with them, she had to focus on just one at time. She tried to learn quickly and largely copied Rapunzel's hand motions, as jerky and unpracticed as her imitations may be.

Every taste, every smell, every feeling, every short, rushing breath etched itself into Elsa's memory to be remembered and cherished forever. The room was growing humid, and it was making it harder to breathe. They kissed like this for several minutes, because Elsa knew that the next step to getting over Anna was moving farther with Rapunzel. She had to push her dear sister away, and right now, that didn't hurt all that much.

Eventually, Rapunzel left, and Elsa luckily did not run in to Anna whilst showing her girlfriend out. She was soon in her nightgown, underneath a blanket and sheet, listening to the footsteps of Anna and Hans going downstairs. He was leaving.

Her heart stopped when a lone pair of footsteps came back up the stairs and paused in front of her door. Then, there was a knock that for some reason made Elsa jump out of her skin. "Elsa," Anna's voice questioned. "Elsa, are you awake?"

There was silence for a few moments. Elsa flip flopped between yelling back that she was and staying silent. She felt terrible for ignoring Anna, but she still wasn't ready to talk to her. _Plus, if I stay quiet, she'll just think I'm asleep, right?_ That was beside the point. Elsa was purposefully ignoring her sister, but then again, maybe after what she found out earlier that night she was justified. Choking on a lump in her throat, the platinum blonde kept her lips sealed.

"Okay," Anna relented mostly to herself, "I guess you're not." Then, she spoke through the door again, like she expected her elder to hear. It kind of scared Elsa, it kind of felt like Anna knew she was awake, but there was _no way_ that she did. "Goodnight, Blondie, I love you!"

 _Blondie!?_ Elsa didn't know what to make of such a phrase. It sounded playful, it even sounded a tiny bit _intimate._ The ensuing confusion just added to Elsa's state of disarray, and as the footsteps receded, Elsa felt another piece of her heart die.

* * *

The next morning, Elsa felt groggy when she woke up. She blinked her tired eyes as she looked around, giving them a few moments to gain focus. She had tossed and turned all night, unable to get any real rest _._ She checked the time on her phone. It was nearly time to wake Anna up. Elsa groaned. She didn't want to wake her sister up, she didn't feel up to it, she was actually a little _scared_ of Anna.

 _But I can't just let her sleep through her classes!_ Of course she _could_ , but wouldn't that be taking it a little bit too far? After all, this was still Anna, right? Sure, she had been deceptive, but for some reason, Elsa still _wanted_ to wake her up. As perplexing as it was to Elsa, she still wanted to look out for Anna.

With a weighty sigh, the platinum blonde stood up. She practically tip-toed into the hallway with nerves rattling like coins in a washing machine. She had to take a moment to steel herself in front of Anna's foreboding door. She swallowed her heart and knocked on the door, mildly at first. Her voice took a moment to summon. "A-Anna," the name seemed to browbeat her, it felt like nails coming out of her throat. "Time to get u-up."

There was stirring from the other side of the door as Elsa walked away, unwilling or unable to wait for a proper confirmation, she wasn't sure which. Still, following the rustling of bedsheets came the familiar and still sing song voice. Even then, it reminded Elsa of the pleasant singing of birds in the early Spring. It didn't assuage the hole in her heart, and it nearly made her cry. It made her think about the Anna she knew before last night. "Huh? I- I've been up for hours... I'll- I'll be out soon!" It was sleepy yet cheerful. Elsa wiped a tear off of her cheek and went back into her room.

From there, she heard Anna's door open and shut, she heard the faint hum of the shower being turned on, and finally, heard her sister head downstairs after changing. For the entire time, Elsa was just trying to not shiver. "So," she heard her sister prompt before she was even down the stairs, "what's for breakfast?" The voice was muted, but she could still hear it.

Then, softer and farther away, "Elsa? Elsa, where are you?" Anna was probably moving around down stairs looking for her. Elsa just bit her lip and tried not to cry.

The footfalls came back upstairs, followed by some gentle knocks at her door. The platinum blonde froze in place like an ice sculpture. "Elsa, I know you're in there." A few moments of silence. "Elsa, answer me, what's going on? Aren't you gonna come eat breakfast?"

Elsa took a moment to process her options. _I should answer her, it's Anna._ Anna, the one who mislead her, the one Elsa was _angry_ with. Her time to think was cut off when she heard the doorknob begin to turn. With haste, the older sister stuttered "I- I need to r-rest."

Anna sounded like she was caught off guard. "Oh, um, do you- do you need anything before I go?"

"N-no thanks." A little spite was attached to the words, as they came out more sharply than Elsa intended.

Her sister seemed reluctant to go just yet. "Okay, well, um, I've gotta go to class, I'll be back right after, okay?"

Elsa felt terrible, she was worrying Anna. "Okay."

Bitter with herself, Elsa tried to escape into a book, but it didn't work. Reading was an escape from reality, but with everything that had been happening lately, Elsa didn't feel like she was _in_ reality. So, she pulled out her phone and texted her girlfriend a good morning message, then opened up her computer and tried her level best to read through some PowerPoint slides.

Rapunzel made sure to keep messaging Elsa throughout the day, even over texts it was easy to tell that she was still worried for her blue-eyed girlfriend and wanted to be sure that she was okay.

* * *

As the day progressed, Elsa's anger didn't. She stayed exasperated at her sister, but the memories of how Anna had helped her through the years swirled through her mind and powered the regret culminating in her.

 _I shouldn't have worried her like that. But I can't confront her about it!_ Elsa had an imbroglio on her hands. She wasn't brave enough to bring the lies up to Anna, but ignoring her sister would break Elsa's heart.

From this, Elsa could only really see one option. She had to _lie_ to Anna, or at least not tell the whole truth. She already knew that the normally bubbly younger girl would again demand to know what was going on. All Elsa had to do was give an answer that was good enough, one that would at least buy her time until she was _able_ to confront Anna.

Elsa squeezed her eyes shut and sighed. _Then I'll be doing to Anna exactly what she did to me. But it's necessary, right? After all, it's just until I can come clean and tell the truth. Just temporary. Yes, temporary._

Her heart beat in self loathing as she repeated it once more to try and make herself feel better. _Temporary._

* * *

When Anna did get home, Elsa was still hiding in her room. Her stomach knotted. She knew what was coming as she heard the anxiety embroidered voice holler "Elsa? I'm home. Where are you?"

Yes, Elsa predicted the knocks that shortly thereafter sounded at her door. "Elsa, are you there?"

She faintly heard over the baleful thuds of her heart. She could barely catch enough breath to rasp in response in a voice that was much weaker and more sickly sounding than she expected. She felt light headed. "Yes."

"You worried me this morning, are you okay? Can I come in?"

Elsa winced as a pin of regret slid into her heart. She sucked in the pasty air and stood. Her knees were weak. It felt funny to walk towards the door. Every step she took seemed to move her farther away. She felt torque on the knife in her back, and wished she could remove it, but she couldn't reach.

"Elsa, hello? Elsa?"

The platinum blonde shut her eyes like a scared child and creaked the door open. She knew that when she opened her eyes, she'd see the most painful face she could imagine.

She was right. She opened her eyes and in a fraction of a second, everything came rushing into her with such force that it nearly knocked her over. The teal eyes, burdened with worry, widened in relief, the gentle freckles shifting as pink lips opened to make a noise. There was Anna. The same Anna, but in a different light. Elsa's heart forgot how to beat for a moment as the pit of her stomach crawled with eight legs and her eyes were sauteed in tears. When loving memories clashed with painful ones, the result was indescribable.

But wait, the hair was wrong. It was pulled back, and though Elsa was directly in front of her, she could tell that it was in a pony tail. It was an odd look on her sister, and the older girl found herself missing the braids. Maybe she could use that to postpone the subject she knew was coming.

Anna took a few steps into the room and gently cupped a warm hand onto Elsa's cheek, so caring, so _confusing._ Elsa moved away from the touch as Anna spouted "Elsa! What's wrong? Are you okay?"

"W-where are your b-braids?" Elsa knew the question was random, but she was using it to stall. Plus, she really was curious. She _liked_ the braids.

Anna furrowed her brow, probably at Elsa's avoidance to her touch. When she answered, it sounded like she just wanted to make sure Elsa was okay, not like she was annoyed at the dodge. "Hans doesn't like them," she explained simply, practically shrugging off the question. The name once again made Elsa uncomfortable. "Now, what's going on?"

Now crying a small amount, the older sister spoke in an asperous voice. "N-nothing." She hoped Anna could just believe her and leave it alone. _Fat chance._

"Something's wrong. What is it?"

"R-really Anna, it's- it's nothing." Elsa's world began to tunnel. She wasn't strong enough for any more of this conversation. She wanted it to end here, for _once_ she wanted Anna to not be so persistent, to give up. _If she hasn't given up on me already..._ She didn't want to _lie_ to her sister, and if their talk ended now, she wouldn't have to.

Anna, unfortunately, had other plans. "It's something. You went to bed early last night and you didn't come to breakfast this morning. I missed you."

God, why did Anna have to be so _caring!?_ It didn't quite make sense to Elsa, but the fact that Anna clearly did care for her made the way she had been mislead sting even _more._ She just had to say _something_ to make Anna give up. "I- I just- I- I'm not feeling well."

Anna didn't look completely convinced, though Elsa could tell that she did take into account what was surely a very sickly looking visage of the platinum blonde. "Elsa," she gently scolded. The rest was implied.

Elsa felt a little defensive, even though she knew she shouldn't. "I am," she insisted. After all, she truly _wasn't_ feeling well, she hadn't caught something, but that didn't mean she didn't feel sick. Because of this, her tone began to appear more forthcoming.

Anna took a long, careful look directly into her sister's eyes. Consideration was written all over her face as Elsa felt like her sister wasn't looking _at_ her, but _in_ her. Like her mind was being probed, like everything inside was being consumed and analyzed. For a moment, Elsa was legitimately worried that Anna would suddenly, somehow know the full reason for her behavior.

The wild relief that followed was almost refreshing. Anna nodded, pursing her lips in concern. "Is there anything I can do? Anything at all?" She didn't look completely convinced, but she was dropping the subject, at least. But was that really a good thing? Did that mean that Anna just didn't _care_ enough? It was contradictory to Elsa's impression from when she opened the door. Yet another thing around her that just didn't make any sense. She looked into now shinier aquamarine eyes. Deep within them, she thought she saw a flicker of hurt.

 _That_ was the worst feeling yet. Elsa battled away tears, a few of the sneakier ones getting by and rising to her eyes. _Does Anna know I'm lying? If she does, did I just torment her the same way she did me?_ Elsa's shoulders slumped, she felt like a monster. She felt like she didn't deserve any care, like maybe she deserved for everyone to give up on her. She wanted to fix it, she didn't want to repay such a deleterious act in kind. She didn't want to harm Anna. She tried to say what she needed to, tried to make herself tell the truth, but she couldn't. Her throat caught on a fishing hook and her lungs spasmed. Her fear made the act ineffable. All that she managed was "I..."

Anna looked back expectantly, but underneath that look, Elsa noticed contrived explanations for her bizarre behavior. Each one made Anna look a little more anxious.

Elsa looked down, for she didn't feel deserving of anything else. "No, thank you."

She didn't see anything, but the elder did hear the quiet gulp, the rigid and shallow inhale, the almost inaudible sigh that followed. "Are you sure?"

Elsa was being handed a second chance, all she had to do was take it. When she tried to, however, she fumbled and simply nodded her head.

The room was quiet for a long time. It was almost like Anna was just waiting for her sister to crack under the pressure, like she knew that that was what she had to do to pull out the truth. After a few moments of sucking thick air, the red head finally said something. "Okay. Well, um, do you feel well enough to do the goggles? I know it's bad timing and I know you hate it, but it's that time of the week."

Elsa gulped. Anna was right, it was. She looked up, but still was unable to meet Anna's eyes, so her eyes roamed everywhere else. Outside, a gust of wind carried away some dried leaves. Outwardly, it may have appeared like she was being brave, when in reality, Elsa was fairly certain she was purposefully punishing herself with her answer. "Y-yes."

Anna reached over and rubbed the platinum blonde's arm reassuringly. Elsa flinched a little, but managed not to yank away from the contact, because if she did, Anna would possibly start questioning again. "Okay, let's get it over with, then you can rest, alright?"

Only a nod was needed to answer. They went downstairs, and when Elsa just saw the goggles she started to panic. Just the _thought_ of having to look at a fake world had her feeling like she was drowning, and all she could do was watch and tremble in apprehension as her sibling hooked up the display and prepared the simulation.

And when a warm hand rubbed her back, Elsa wanted to step away from it, but she was too paralyzed by fear to do so. "It's okay, Elsa," a tender voice told her. "It'll be over before you know it."

It was time to enter the virtual reality. Breathing faster than a panting, tired dog, the platinum blonde picked up her terrorizers. She closed her eyes and slowly put them on, shaking from her distress.

As usual, when she opened her eyes, she found herself in a city of empty streets and simplistic buildings. Elsa froze. She couldn't even move a step, she couldn't bring herself to look around, to examine the sparse scenery. There didn't have to be noise to inundate her mind with ghastly pulses of the world, with a scene of her mother's crash. Her ears began to ring just like that fateful night.

Elsa couldn't breathe, she was becoming dizzy, she tried to fight it, but it felt like she had a rock lodged in her throat and she just couldn't get it out. She couldn't save herself, she couldn't keep standing, her mind started to go bank from lack of oxygen. She wasn't going to be able to do this.

"It's okay, Elsa," came her sister's voice in an attempt to encourage her, "you're doing great."

There was the _lie_ again. Her blood scorched, her temper fractured and irascible. She didn't want to be lied to, especially not now. She _knew_ she was doing terribly, she _knew_ she was failing, but here Anna was, spoon feeding her the same lie she had apparently been poisoning Elsa's mind with for the passed five years. The mixing of anger and anxiety with her adrenaline pushed Elsa into a full-fledged panic attack, crippling her and making her heartbeat and oxygen intake erratic.

"Elsa!" The goggles were discarded from her, but Elsa hardly noticed, she was just focused on _breathing,_ on not dying, not drowning on the oppressive air around her. "Elsa, it's okay, it's okay, I'm here, I'm right here." Anna nestled her sister in her arms and attempted to comfort her.

But she had just lied _again,_ and Elsa didn't want any of it. As soon as she regained any autonomy of her body, she ripped out of the hug. It felt like ripping off a band-aid, but at a certain point, it was better to let the wound get some air.

"Elsa, what in the world?"

The platinum blonde tried to think, her mind was so jumbled. But one seemed to stick. _Rapunzel._ She'd felt safe with Rapunzel, she knew having her girlfriend there would help. "I want Rapunzel."

Ache. That's all Elsa saw in her sister's eyes. That's all she found under the tenor of a poor guise on Anna's voice. _How many times am I going to do that to Anna today?_ Though Elsa did momentarily want to retract her statement, she ignored the urge. The younger girl nodded and displayed what looked like a forced smile. "Of course, I think she'd be a lot of help."

Elsa didn't really know how to respond so she simply called and invited Rapunzel over. After that point, her sister seemed a little more than tense and uncharacteristically reserved. _That's because_ I've _been avoiding her today._ But there was definitely something else going on in Anna's mind. She was acting territorial, like Rapunzel was stepping on her turf. _She's jealous that I want Rapunzel to help me with the goggles instead of her. Maybe she should have thought about that before she lied to me! No, stop, that's no way to think. Either way, it's another tally to the number of times I've hurt Anna today._

When Rapunzel did arrive, the platinum blonde looked at her sister pleadingly. Anna nodded with a look of consideration on her face, automatically knowing what was being requested. The atmosphere around them was a little awkward, which was something new between the sisters. Elsa didn't like it. It was _definitely_ a negative change. It settled in her stomach about as well as fizz.

When the green eyed woman entered, she cheerily said "hey" to Anna, who greeted back politely. _Politely,_ Elsa noticed, not _friendly._

She then said hello to her girlfriend with a snug hug and a quick kiss on the lips. It only lasted for a second, but Elsa managed to focus her attention on Anna during it. She expected to find a transient hint of jealousy or pain, but what she did see was worse that either of the two. Ann's arms were crossed over her chest and her face was largely blank. She was _withdrawn._ This was going too far, and Elsa was suddenly choking into her kiss.

She wished she hadn't invited Rapunzel over.

It wasn't long before the three were in the living room. Anna set up the simulation like before, but this time, when someone tried to placate the platinum blonde, it wasn't Anna's voice. "You're gonna be alright, okay, Elsa? Remember, it's not real, it can't hurt you."

That was true, but it _felt_ real. The hand on Elsa's back wasn't her sister's, either. Rapunzel rubbed little circles, and although they made her feel a little better, it was nothing compared to just days ago when she would be in Anna's consummate hands, the ones that would melt Elsa like ice in the sun and render her state of hysteria quiescent.

Elsa gulped and nodded, shoving the goggles on with the same struggle as before. She looked around at the barren display and took a step. She moved, she _moved._ Already, this was going better than last time. She felt a surge of confidence and kept walking.

But quickly, even as she still felt the presence of Rapunzel's hand on her back warding off her demons, the sky loomed over Elsa's head. Her lungs once again began to struggle as her feet became sticky. She tried to tunnel her vision, tried to focus on one thing, but in that little pinhole of sight, she saw _everything._

"You can do this," she heard from Rapunzel.

 _I can do it. I want to get better. I can do it._ She pressed on, feeling like an arctic adventurer braving a storm.

"Okay, Elsa, I'm gonna turn on noises, some birds, okay? Only birds, don't worry." Anna's voice still had a trace of that almost motherly protectiveness in it. She didn't want to frighten Elsa, but there was also some semblance of bitterness in her words.

"Hang in there, Elsa."

She tried to, but the birds started chirping in the background, quickly giving way to another bout of tinnitus. It was _too_ real now, too much like the environment she feared so much. She felt like she was actually outside and quickly succumbed to yet another panic attack.

Swiftly, the goggles were removed, and she was being held tightly in Rapunzel's arms. Before the woman could even speak, Elsa heard the distant echo of Anna's almost domineering voice. "She's my sister!"

Then, Elsa found herself hanging off of Anna while the red head cradled her and gently wiped moon-kissed strands of hair away from lachrymose eyes. "It's okay, Elsa, you're okay." Henceforth during the next few minutes came iterations of the sentiment with slight variations, but always gently delivered.

Normally, that would have worked. Normally, Elsa would be calming down, be able to breathe. But not now. Because, what if Anna was still _lying_? Elsa was still resentful about the previous night. She gasped out "R-Rapunzel," and lunged at the older woman. She was caught and comforted in a similar way as before.

And Elsa didn't look up, she kept her face buried in Rapunzel's shoulder, because when she heard Anna speak, she knew if she looked up she'd see what kind of damage she had just done to her sister. "I," Anna started with a mix of vindication, jealousy, and suffering, "think I'm going to go see Hans."

Elsa regretted her actions, yes, but anything Anna said to her that evening felt like a stab in the heart. Even the caring words stung because they just _confused_ Elsa. So she stayed where she was and let her heart wilt when she heard the door slam.

* * *

Anna still wasn't back. It wasn't particularly late, but Elsa was trying to fall asleep. Rapunzel had taken a while, but eventually satiated her girlfriend's panic attack and had stayed until she was sure Elsa was okay. She was perfect: caring, selfless, gorgeous, smart, and a little awkward. So, Elsa wondered, why had she preformed so poorly even with Rapunzel there for her? Why had it taken so long to stop her panic attack?

But most of all, why didn't Elsa feel _happy_ with Rapunzel?

Elsa thought back to when it was just her and Anna, and Anna would be the one to hold her and guide her through the simulation. She did better back then, she felt safer back then. Yes, Rapunzel had helped, but it didn't compare to how much Anna bolstered Elsa.

Maybe that was it. Rapunzel, though a wonderful person, simply didn't compare to Anna in Elsa's mind. If anything Elsa had read in books or watched in movies was accurate, she should feel stronger feelings for her girlfriend by now, but she simply didn't.

Elsa wasn't falling in love with Rapunzel.

Elsa was _still_ in love with Anna, even if she couldn't trust her.

On that night, Elsa seriously started doubting that Rapunzel could help her forge a makeshift key. She was pretty damned sure that her and Rapunzel just simply wouldn't work. Maybe she could give them one last shot.

The only problem was, she didn't want to lead Rapunzel on.


	9. Swan Song

"Elsa," Rapunzel said, shifting in her spot. It was a Saturday evening, they were downstairs watching a movie, huddled together on the couch. Elsa was leaning in to her girlfriend, who had her arms around Elsa, hugging her from the side. It was comfortable, but Elsa would have preferred to stay in her room. Being downstairs had her on edge because of the obvious risk of seeing Anna, and because the house seemed so much more open than before. Nothing had physically changed, but Elsa's perception had, the area of the downstairs didn't sit well with her.

At that moment, though, her phobia was relatively tractable, because Anna was out with Hans, probably at dinner, and Rapunzel was there holding her. Staying out with Hans after class, Elsa had noticed, was now a daily routine for the strawberry blonde. If there was one thing Elsa could count on, it was that Anna wouldn't be home until late evening at least.

Elsa noticed that when Rapunzel said her name, she also went tense. This had the platinum blonde sitting up a little with her brows furrowed and her stomach behaving rather fastidiously. "Yes?"

Rapunzel's pupils dilated as she looked away from the television screen, the rich green irises thinning in favor of collecting adequate light. She was nibbling her lip and took a couple seconds to think about what she was about to say.

Right then, Elsa knew this wasn't going to be an enjoyable conversation.

"Well, Anna-" the platinum blonde's heart let out a superfluous amount of cries at the name, the seemingly moribund organ bringing the rest of her body down with it. "-Has been asking me about you."

Elsa was irresolute. In fact, she didn't even know what to _think._ The pain of days ago still felt like a freshly salted wound upon her body, and her lungs still struggled to obtain air at the mention or sight of her sister. She tried to hide her emotions, tried to be phlegmatic, but they showed through on her face and in her words. "W-what about me?"

It was clear by her expression that Rapunzel noticed. She clasped one of Elsa's hands in her own and very lightly continued. "She's been asking what's going on with you, if you're okay."

Ever since Elsa had caused her sister to leave the house with a slamming door behind her, they hadn't really been speaking. Tensions were high. Just being around Anna felt like stretching a rubber band to its limit and hoping it didn't snap and sting your hand. So, it seemed to Elsa that the younger girl didn't want anything to do with her.

But, the simple act of asking Rapunzel about Elsa meant that Anna still cared, and that was enough to run a tremor through Elsa's stomach and up to her lower lip. This subject was still too sensitive to prod, so the younger woman tried to perry. "I- I'm fine."

Rapunzel sighed. "You haven't talked to her, have you?"

Taking her hands from warm ones and using them to hug herself, the platinum blonde looked towards her maudlin heart. She was struggling to keep her breath regular. "No."

What the hand now on her shoulder lacked in force, it made up for in solicitude. "Why not," came the magnanimous voice.

After her introspection about her and Rapunzel the other night, Elsa knew why she felt the need to keep going in the conversation. Well, she could narrow it down to one of two reasons: she simply needed someone to be there for her, no matter who it was; or she thought that maybe being open with Rapunzel would magically make her fall in love. Unfortunately, Elsa didn't have the time to figure out which of those reasons were true as her facial muscles cramped and fought against each other. Her breaths were shallow, and her eyes shut so tightly that she saw dancing lights in her lids. "B-because I'm scared!"

"Elsa, there's nothing to be scared of."

"Yes, there is," Elsa insisted slightly crossly. Their placement in the house already had her on edge, and their topic of discussion certainly wasn't favorable.

Rapunzel's brows hung loosely over her eyes, her mouth in the tiniest frown. Her expression was so full of compassion, so laced in caring that just for a fleeting moment it seemed to cross the line into loving. Elsa's plate was already full, she had no room for such a thought, so she snubbed it, though it didn't work all that well. "I know you're scared Elsa, I understand, I really do. That's how I know that if you talk to Anna about this, she'll understand, too. You don't have to be scared of her."

Even if that was true, it didn't solve the lying. It didn't ensure that Elsa wouldn't be lied to again, so even though it was a good point and a thoughtful statement, it didn't really help. "I- I don't want to be lied to again."

"I know," Rapunzel said in a melancholy voice. She then pulled Elsa closer, so their bodies were once again snuggled together in a way Elsa wished hers and Anna's would be. "Just promise me that you'll talk to her when you're ready."

Elsa pressed her tearful face against the present bosom and, gritting her teeth in response to the mental agony she was sitting through, nodded her head. "I p-promise." _If I'm ever ready._

The retaliation was a simple nod and "okay," gently ushered from the older woman's lips. Elsa clung to her girlfriend, digging in and burrowing like a groundhog, attempting to mollify her mind. But as she did so, her thoughts drifted, and she found herself discontented with the embrace she was receiving. It wasn't working. She missed her dear anodyne, her rock, her heart's holder. She longed to be hugging Anna, the Anna she _knew._

But that Anna was gone, she had lied, and Elsa wondered if she'd ever look at her sister the same again.

All Elsa had to do was get over what was really stopping her from confronting Anna: her phobia. Then maybe it could all go back to normal.

* * *

Elsa and Rapunzel were still on the couch watching the movie when Anna got back home. Watching was a strong word for what the platinum blonde was doing, it was more like staring blankly at the screen, trying to pacify her sick stomach and tired mind. Elsa was back in her girlfriend's arms, though she didn't find them as cozy as she used to. It was like a switch was flicked in her mind after her night of realization a few days ago. She was trying, but she just couldn't find the same kind of enjoyment in Rapunzel's company anymore. Though she searched, all she found was the friendship they had shared for so many years, none of that exhilarating initial romance. Maybe, if she tried hard enough, she could turn that switch back around.

As tense as she already was, she tensed more when the doorknob sounded. The green eyed girl picked up on this and rubbed Elsa's arm. "It's okay, Elsa."

Just accepting the sentiment, the younger of the two tried not to look at the door, she didn't want to make the mistake of eye contact right then. Her efforts, however, were fruitless, because she couldn't just _ignore_ the one she besot. So she looked.

What initially grabbed her attention was the dress. It was rich green, and wasn't one Elsa recognized, which meant Anna bought it without telling her sister, and although it wasn't the most risqué, it certainty wasn't as modest as her others. It showcased more skin than Elsa wanted. It was cut a little low, and used its design to aggrandize her cleavage. Needless to say, this peppered Elsa's being with desire, honing her hungry vision in on the area, and she could feel herself heating and dampening.

The skirt didn't help, either. It stopped about halfway down Anna's legs, leaving miles of bare skin to her ankles and teasing the imagination with endless possibilities. Elsa's mouth was drying like a desert, and she had to swallow a little as her breaths shallowed.

The next thing she noticed was makeup. More than her now _sexy_ sister normally wore. This, of course, wasn't necessarily a bad thing, but the way it was applied irked Elsa. It was covering Anna's freckles, they were barely visible. It didn't make sense, those little spots were adorable, they were part of her sister's beauty, and it wasn't like Anna had ever shown signs of disliking her cute little sun-spots. In the past, Anna had even expressed her enjoyment of Elsa's miniscule palate of freckles.

Anna's lips glowered red, not as rich of a shade as Elsa used, but definitely more vivid and at _least_ as demanding of assessment. It lionized Anna's naturally smooth lips, balancing her face like a modest garnish on a master chef's dish.

When blue eyes roamed to copper hair, it all made sense. It was in the pony tail once again, and Elsa recalled why that was. It was because of _Hans._ Anna was altering her appearance for Hans. Elsa's eyes narrowed, her internal invectives towards the brown haired man lit like a fuse towards dynamite. Hans was changing _her_ Anna, he wasn't allowed to do that!

At last, Elsa met Anna's eyes. They were looking _right_ at her, a little surprised, and only glanced away for a moment when Rapunzel said "Ooh, Anna, you look nice, you had a big date night, huh?"

In that moment, Anna's eyes spoke a resentful soliloquy that would have troubled Rapunzel had she been paying as much attention as Elsa. But just an instant later, it was over, and Anna was wearing what Elsa could only assume was a masterful ersatz grin. Though the expression and response were meant for the eldest, all attention was on the most scared. "Thanks, Rapunzel. Hans and I decided that it'd been a while since our last nice date, so we splurged."

Elsa didn't really hear her girlfriend's next inquiry, because she was too busy having a heart attack under the pressure of her sister's gaze, but it was something along the lines of asking where they went. It looked, for a hair of time, like Anna was going to say something to Elsa. It looked like she was worried. That was replaced with what could almost be described as hauteur, though, and her focus shifted. "I'm sorry, what was that, Rapunzel?"

The older woman was chewing her lip, assessing her options and the invisible, strained tethers connecting the siblings. She definitely saw the exchange of looks, even if she may not have completely understood _what_ had been communicated, she knew enough to know it wasn't _good._ Why'd she have to be so percipient? Rapunzel had the senses of an eagle and intuition of a mother. Elsa wished she didn't. "Actually, I think I should be going now."

Elsa's eyes went wide. _No no no no, Rapunzel, don't leave!_

Looking pleased with herself, the strawberry blonde agreed. "Yes, I think that would be best."

Was that underhanded? Because it sounded so to Elsa. It was hidden in the delivery, quite unlike Anna, but still so meticulously prepared. But then, jealousy can make people do strange things. _So can manipulative degenerates, like Hans._ Elsa didn't know if she was furious or terrified, all she knew was that she was shaking, her stomach hurt, and she couldn't breathe.

She scarcely even noticed she was being hugged until a soft voice fluttered into her ears. The air expelled from Rapunzel's mouth pushed Elsa's hair in a ticklish, warm breeze. "Talk to her," she begged, cautiously but assertively, rubbing the younger of the two's arm.

Then, she was being kissed on the lips. She already only had half a mind to work with, and it didn't think to reciprocate, so Elsa just let it happen. She was sweating like a pig, but felt _so_ cold that it made her shiver.

"Call me if you need to, okay?"

This time, Elsa was given enough time to process with her taxed brain and managed a nod. Shortly thereafter, Rapunzel was gone, her trail followed by Anna's watchful glare.

Then, she was alone with her sister. It was the perfect opportunity, a gift handed to her by unstinting, godly hands. Now was her chance, if she could just face her fears _now,_ if she could just tell Anna what's wrong, if she could simply _talk_ to her sister, it could all end that night.

But those were some big ifs, and if meant nothing in the real world. In reality, Elsa's vocal chords were being pinched by her bilious affliction, which was bolstered by Anna's lie. She felt like she was locked in a cage with a hungry lion, terror goading the hand around her neck, and the slightly sweet smell of Anna's perfume making its way into her mind and juxtaposing her fear. In reality, Elsa was unable to say a word in the few seconds she had before Anna spoke.

Notice of Elsa's domestic conflict was certainly taken by the strawberry blonde, but she did nothing about it. "Go to bed, Elsa." She walked away, up the stairs after her curt sounding bid of night time wishes. There was no gentle emotion inserted into the words, they were there, stark and naked, nothing more than their very definitions.

So now Elsa was alone, still unable to utter a word, but able to _think._ She thought about Anna's rather aboveboard eyes and what they told her minutes prior. Specifically what the surprise was about. It took more than a few minutes of consideration, because what in the world was there to be startled by? After all, it wasn't unexpected for Rapunzel to be over on a weekend, nor was it abnormal for Elsa to watch a movie. There was, however, one thing that Elsa could think of to cause the reaction: she was downstairs.

The only explanation for Anna's brief surprise was that she had noticed that Elsa was spending more time in her room lately. She knew that Elsa was hesitant to even go to the living room or the kitchen. She was aware of Elsa's recrudescence since a few days ago.

But if Elsa's location caught her off guard, didn't that mean she didn't expect Elsa to improve again? It pointed to Anna giving up, and that stung. That made the platinum blonde sob softly in her place, that made her lose confidence in herself. It made her feel like her life was a waste.

It also, however, made her happy that she hadn't said a word, because it reinforced how much Anna had been lying. If she didn't even believe in Elsa, it meant _any_ support she had given was a fib, and that rapidly reminded Elsa of why she was angry with the red head. Her heart struggled to obey the hormones in her body, trying to stay afloat in the scalding blood.

But then again, maybe this wasn't even Anna at all. Maybe this was the Anna that _Hans_ had created, _if_ he was molding her. Maybe she didn't mean it, maybe she _did_ believe in Elsa. But that was a slim chance, and Elsa knew it.

Either way, Elsa wanted to believe that, because if her sister really didn't think anything of her, how could Elsa think anything of herself? Yes, she clung to that idea, because it was all that could keep her going.

* * *

Not much really changed by that Monday in that Elsa still hid in her room for as long as possible, and she was left to sulk alone until the sun met its final hours for the day. She made breakfast for and woke her sister up for class that morning, in that order, so as to avoid Anna. They didn't speak to each other, they didn't even see each other. Funny thing, love is, making those it possesses stalwartly meet each others' needs, no matter the circumstances.

Rapunzel, of course, called Elsa throughout the day, asking several times about whether Elsa had spoken to her sister yet. The younger of the couple, of course, wanted to do everything she could to stiff the subject, so each time it was brought up, she changed their conversation. This most likely gave Rapunzel an answer, anyway.

Now, as dusk settled down upon the forbidden lands outside of Elsa's window in preparation for night to fall smoothly after, the platinum blonde lay on her bed re-running the previous night in her head.

Yes, she was anxious about it. It made her feel as well as a sea-sick landlubber fairing a stormy ocean, but that's not what she was thinking about.

She was unable to get the image of her sister's cleavage and toned legs out of her head. It was so much _skin._ How she tried to force the thoughts out to do something else, to not cave to her more carnal desires. She told herself she shouldn't as her hand cupped a familiar breast. She tried to throw the images out while maundering digits slithered to her womanhood, which was jump-started and just _screaming_ to be touched.

She was supposed to be _angry_ with Anna, not aroused! She was betrayed and left alone, and she told herself she didn't _want_ to do anything. How could she, in such a peevish, offended, heartbroken state, find so much immediate pleasure in the mental facsimile of the one who inflicted such calamity upon her mind? She didn't want to do this, there was no way.

Oh, but by _God_ she did. And all the frustration she felt, all the sour feelings meddling around her mind flushed through her body like a wave of power, igniting the flare between her legs in the form of pent up sexual frustration. It was amazing how well such negative emotions preformed when put to such use. Only during her high of arousal and satisfaction they elucidated her byzantine situation. Just for a few moments, they allowed her to _enjoy_ herself, to forget everything.

So yes, Elsa was furious at Anna still, but that just made her personal endeavor all the more satisfying and heated. That helped bring the scorch to her chest, the arch in her back, the _lightning_ down her spine. It stole away her normal breath, replacing it with quick pants and active vocal chords. After all, who's to say you can't take pleasure in someone, even if you're splenetic?

As Elsa pleasured herself, not a single thought of Rapunzel wandered into her mind.

* * *

Elsa lay there, panting, and she felt a peculiar feeling welling withing her stomach, one she hadn't felt in several days. Not really, anyway. Hunger. Her anxiety had vanquished such a sensation for the most part. She still ate, but only because she knew she had to. Now, however, she was momentarily relaxed and was able to feel the growling in her stomach as bubbles traversed her empty belly.

She thought for a moment. Anna was out with Hans, and certainly wouldn't be back for a little while, so Elsa should have plenty of time to go down and make a quick meal. She'd be back in her room before her sister got back.

At least, that's what her plan was. But life had a way of wiggling from the confining grip of planned actions and throwing a curve ball at the maker. The platinum blonde lost time as she pondered her actions and their implications on her and Rapunzel's relationship. She hadn't even _thought_ about her girlfriend. Not a single image, nothing. Even then, the fever that came with the images of Anna she had conjured finagled its way between her knees.

And that's why Elsa decided that she'd do something special for Rapunzel. She'd give the relationship its swan song, and maybe from the melody would rise something real. Maybe, with one last, big push, Elsa could force herself to fall in love with Rapunzel. She hoped she could, because, if not, it was time to stop leading her dear friend on.

Luckily for the white-blond woman, Halloween was right around the corner, coming up at the end of that very week. _I'll use that, I'll make her a nice dinner and dessert, I'll dress up extra nice, I can decorate, I can make it as much like a real date as possible._ She felt tugging at her heart strings as the phrase "real date" floated on through her mind. _I may be stuck in these walls, but I will make the most of it, for Rapunzel!_

She just hoped that Anna would be out, otherwise, she wouldn't have the bravery to leave her own room.

While Elsa crept into the kitchen she was on high alert, and had to focus on one thing at a time, otherwise her phobia would get the best of her and she knew she'd run back up stairs. It was bigger, fiercer, and gnarlier than before, making Elsa feel so small in a world of giants. She had to be quick, so actually cooking was out.

With the tension in her throat high, she made a quick peanut butter and jelly sandwich and was just about done when the door swung open, spilling giggles and laughter into the house. Elsa stopped dead, transforming into a statue, butter knife still in hand as her breaths became as absent as a stone's.

It was Anna's laughter and a man's voice. _Hans_. Elsa tried to think of what to do, but her mind was plodding. She was about to vanish to her room as quietly as possible, about to run scared like a child, but she was an instant too slow.

"Elsa," came the red head's surprised voice. She was wearing a similar coat of makeup and dress as before, but this time with stockings underneath, presumably for warmth. After all, it was late October and the chill of mother nature was befalling the area. The cool, transient breeze wafted from the door into the kitchen and caressed the platinum blonde's shoulders, leaving goosebumps where it once was.

Elsa didn't really know what to do, so after several failed attempts, she murmured "h-hi."

Hans interjected in a jovial yet caustic tone, reacting to his girlfriend's shock. "Ah yes, what a surprise, Elsa's home!" He then grinned at Anna, clearly happy about his shank's placement.

Yeah, that hurt a little, but Elsa knew he was doing it on purpose, so she tried not to let it get to her. When Anna just looked at Hans, biting her lip, and definitely understanding his insinuation, however, is when Elsa really felt the acerbic kick in her chest. She had expected Anna to come to her aid. Nothing more than a light slap on the arm and a harsh look would have been necessary, just a small gesture to let Elsa know she had her back. But there was _none._ Even if Anna didn't exactly look happy about what her boyfriend was saying, it hurt all the same. Elsa knew she was on her own for this. Had things really gotten that bad between them?

She couldn't do this, no way. So she turned and headed for the safety of her room, no longer hungry.

"What's the matter? You don't wanna hang out with us?"

Elsa stopped when the deep voice battered her ears. It had a certain kind of masterfully laid down innocence to it, like it was _friendly._ But Elsa knew what she needed to know about Hans, he wasn't being nice, he had an agenda, whatever it may be, and she wasn't going to fall for his play. Without turning around, she remarked "I'm tired." After all, it was best to keep things civil, right? If the road between her and Anna was this littered with potholes, she didn't want to add any more. So she let the anger within her simmer in her skull, ready to be let out when she was in private.

"Ah, come on," Hans begged, "join us for dinner, it'll give us time to catch up. It's been a while since we last chatted."

His last few words were more pointed than the rest, and Elsa knew _exactly_ what he was referring to. The kitchen, on the night of the double date. Elsa bristled and turned slowly. Her breath was harder to control as flames began licking her insides. The memory was piquant and it made her shake with a mixture of anger and terror, summoning what she knew where the beginnings of a shortly-incubated panic attack. Hans's eyes conveyed that he very well new what he was doing, and his smug face betrayed his confidence. He _knew_ Elsa wouldn't say anything. It was disorienting, seeing such malicious self-assurance.

Anna, obviously clueless of the incident that the two were discussing right in front of her, was furrowing her brows at her sister, seeing the clenched fists, the gritted teeth, and hearing the deepened breaths.

"I'd rather not," Elsa practically growled.

"Aw, but we had so much fun last time!"

Okay, _that_ was it, to _Hell_ with civility. Elsa burst a gasket, spewing the painful steam through her mouth and making her words corrosive. "No, it wasn't _fun_! I hated every moment I had to spend in the same _room_ as you, Hans!" And that _God dammed_ smirk, it was so irritating! Elsa didn't even notice that the vein on her forehead was inflated like a balloon. She was too busy catching herself on a hand railing, huffing and puffing concrete in and out of her chest and steadying her wobbling knees.

She did, however, descry his satisfied smile and victorious cross of the arms. It was almost in slow motion that she saw and heard the next few moments play out. She came to the dreadful realization just a split second too late. Hans was purposefully egging her on, he was making _her_ look like the asshole in front of Anna.

And it worked. The younger sister vitriolically demanded "Elsa, what's gotten in to you!?" She grabbed her significant other's arm in her own, latching to him protectively. "Hans didn't do anything to you!" Elsa's heart dropped faster than it ever had before. She'd just been played, and she felt the cement wall of emotions slam into her and leave her ears ringing. It left her heart without the energy to pump and her stomach without the will to turn. It evacuated all air from her lungs and made sure she had no drive to breathe. It hurt, it ached _exactly_ how Elsa imagined being shot through the heart would feel.

Hans gestured for Anna to cool off with his hand, sending a wry, vile, snake-like grin to the platinum blonde as he did. "It's fine, it's fine. I forgive her."

Then, Anna looked up at him lovingly with a half smile. _Lovingly,_ not adoringly, and Elsa had it. Her wrath once again manifested itself vocally and forced a high-pitched squeal from sealed lips. She faintly heard her sister apologizing for her actions as she stormed back up into her room and locked the door. In that moment, she _wished_ she was a child again, just so she was able to throw a proper tantrum. After all, Hans had won _again_ and there was nothing she could do about it! The feeling of having no power in the entire situation aggravated her very being. That coupled with the complete and utter heartache of Anna siding with Hans suddenly forced extremely loud sobs out of Elsa's mouth. She slammed her eyes shut and tried to mute her cries by biting a pillow, dampening the comforting item with her tears and saliva. But now her panic attack was in full swing, disseminating to every inch of her body like a septic disease.

Nearly twenty minutes of empty breaths and anxiety that was so powerful it crippled her heart later, Elsa was able to roll over and mope, her entire body hurting. She tried to sleep, but couldn't. Such a welcome escape wasn't within her power, so she stayed awake late into the night. Eventually, she decided that she at least had one more thing: Rapunzel. She was going to make the best dinner for Rapunzel, she was going to _make_ herself fall in love, no matter how hard she had to throw herself at the woman.


	10. What Have I Done?

It was an odd feeling, seeing that Anna did in fact clear the plate of food that Elsa prepared for her each morning. They didn't cross paths after waking up, both girls made sure of that, yet the platinum blonde would get up extra early every day just make her sister breakfast. It was an almost compulsory act brought upon her by the arcane emotion of love.

She was still mad at Anna. The feeling wasn't diminishing, and she was downright mortified of Anna. Yet she _still_ made her breakfast, and a couple times even prepared her dinner, and was subsequently absent when any of the offerings were eaten. They weren't gestures of peace or apology, they were simply something Elsa _had_ to do, and both sisters seemed to understand that.

Maybe that's why it felt good to see the plates cleared from the table and stowed in the dishwasher during Elsa's sparse and short trips downstairs, ones she made only when she was absolutely certain that her sister had gone for the day. Because it was some sort of communication, a _link_ between the two, something constant that, in one way or another, tied them together.

After all, the past week, since the incident with Hans, had been largely vacant of any sort of interaction between Elsa and Anna. Sure, there were passing glances here and short words there, their days peppered with brief, uncomfortable, silent communication, but that didn't really count. It didn't count because nothing was _really_ said.

But the plates spoke, the meals whispered. Anna continuing to eat the breakfasts that Elsa prepared her meant, to Elsa, that she _wanted_ to keep interacting with her elder, in one way or another. After all, Anna was quite obviously able to prepare and eat her own breakfast, yet she chose the pre made one. But then, perhaps that was just because it was easier than making something herself.

Elsa didn't like that option, though, so she made herself believe that Anna was speaking to her. What else could she do after spending, long, droning days mulling over her sister in a saturnine room with a window looming over her head like a threat?

And the feeling that was bubbling up deep in the roots of Elsa's gut that Halloween morning when she noticed a cleaned plate by the sink was only farther proof, right? The feeling that wiggled her stomach and very briefly ebbed her fear of the downstairs. It was like a taste, just a drop of the nectar that was the sensation that she used to get when Anna would comfort her. It left her hungry for more.

But it was transient, and once it took its natural leave, the platinum blonde would once again see the walls around her fall, exposing her to the world. She'd again feel the prickle of fire in her blood and the sore, unsealing, and aching hole in her heart. The necrotic tissue burned like a match beneath her skin. She'd again feel her more than impressive discomfort at being outside of her room.

She had to _focus_ right now. Elsa pinched her eyes shut and intently subdued the surge of panic as best she could. She began to shake and her ears tickled with the prognostication of ringing. _I have to do this, it's for Rapunzel- for us._

Even though it was Saturday, Elsa had still made her red headed sister something to eat. She was in her room stressing over how she'd find the time to prepare everything for Rapunzel with Anna patrolling the house all day, when a stroke of luck finally found its way over to her. The front door had thudded shut, which perked Elsa's ears up. Anna was out somewhere right now, and although Elsa didn't know how long she had, she knew this might be her one chance to get everything started for that evening.

So she had forced herself to stumble into the kitchen, which is where she now stood, staring at an empty plate. Her mind was on high alert and every sound, every click from the central AC, every soft call of wind, _everything_ brought her to the cusp of a heart attack. But she was _going_ to make this night perfect.

Elsa decided to start on dessert first, as she'd have to let it set all day, anyway. She had the perfect idea in mind: a bunt cake. To match the season, she'd flavor it with pumpkin spice. She had made such a delight before, albeit not pumpkin flavored, so she knew what she had to use. Crossing pale fingertips, she hoped beyond hope that the kitchen was already furnished with all the necessary provisions. Zipping through a mental checklist, part in the fridge and part in the pantry, the woman's heart became more volatile as each item was secured. It seemed as though luck was genial for her that morning, relatively speaking, because she had everything she needed right there.

She got to work, mixing what would become a delectable dessert. It soothed her. The precise measurements, ensuring the proper amount of each ingredient so as to not desiccate the final product; the familiar action of blending odds and ends together; the powdery mess that seemed to come hand in hand with baking, no matter how tidy the culprit was; the heat wave billowing from the pre-heated oven, roasting Elsa's skin as it engulfed her head. It all totaled up in to a distraction, one good enough that it ALMOST took her mind off of her phobia, off of Anna.

But then, that's just what was missing, wasn't it? Anna. Her proud, excited grin, smiling teal eyes watching the elder sister work her magic. Elsa was alone, and that struck a chord in her, powerfully enough to cause her to stop and catch a tear as she swung shut the oven door. The prosaic pumping of blood within her seemed to halt altogether as she rapidly began to feel sorry for herself. _This is for Rapunzel, Rapunzel will be proud._ That didn't help.

Elsa sniffled, trying not to let tears fall from her eyes and choking on a tense neck. Reality was like a bucket of cold water being splashed on her face as it reminded her that she was all by herself, downstairs, away from her room. Hyperventilating and gagging on an effervescent mixture of fear and sorrow, she willed her stiff yet unhinged knees to carry her back up the stairs.

She had time, she had to find out what to wear anyway. It was a win-win, in a sense: Elsa escaped the dangerous clutches of the world around her _and_ got to determine what would be best suited for that evening.

She arrived to her room panting and took several minutes to calm down as the memories of all the laughs and smiles she had shared with Anna while cooking scuttled about her mind. This was going to be a taxing evening.

* * *

Early that afternoon, Anna was _still_ out, and Elsa was beginning to become restless. She did her best to ignore it, to fill the gaping, ravenous hole in her heart by texting her girlfriend and preparing their supper, but it didn't work. Even as she meticulously stuffed a couple bell peppers and carved jack-o-lantern faces on them, she couldn't get her mind off of where in the world her sister was.

Strange, she didn't want Anna to be gone, but she _certainly_ didn't want Anna to be home. Indecisiveness agitated her stomach like a rattlesnake's tail and threatened to stick its hungry fangs right into her heart. It felt like she was being physically torn into two pieces.

* * *

Elsa looked herself up and down in the mirror, puffing her chest out as if to appear more confident, a personal fib. She wore a black dress, the wavy skirt floating down to her mid-calves, and an orange belt hugging her curvaceous waist. The top was sleeveless, however, it had shoulder straps knitted to look like spiderwebs creeping over her deltoids, down to her collar bone. The outfit was completed with more spiderweb trims and small, stylized arachnids seemingly crawling along their spinnings. The intense black was charred darker than the deepest Halloween night, the orange belt blazing off of the middle, and milky, moonlit skin shining everywhere it was exposed. Such stark contrast made Elsa look as white as a ghost, which, for the night, was a desired effect. Plus, Anna always seemed to like her sister's pale complexion.

A generous bust was held by the chest cupping of the dress, which actually provided a display of some cleavage. Although it was a small amount, it was still noticeable, and was definitely more than the platinum blonde would normally show. But she wore this dress only one day out of each year, for only one reason: for Anna. Anna had helped her pick it out, and was the only other person to ever see her in it. She was, for all intents and purposes, the sole reason for the ownership of such a dress.

But tonight, it wasn't for Anna. Deep down, in some dusty corner of her rapidly drying heart, Elsa knew that it felt wrong to use this dress, but superficially she just didn't care. It was symbolic, in a way, taking one object that was only for Anna and bestowing it upon Rapunzel, much like she was trying to do with her heart.

Not feeling particularly great about herself, Elsa applied some lipstick. Orange, to match her outfit. When she was satisfied with her handiwork, the platinum blonde gathered her nerves. Rapunzel would be there soon, and she had one more thing to do _downstairs._ She wouldn't be back in her room for several hours. Elsa gulped and stayed put as long as she could.

* * *

Being in such an open area like the lower floor felt like balancing on the cusp of a cliff, like a tiny gust of wind could put her off-kilter and send her plummeting into God knows how abrupt and painful of an impact.

Elsa was busy dimming the lights and placing several candles, the lighting glowering with romanticism, the heavier light and heat from the candles and fireplace giving the room an almost husky aura. She could barely keep hold on her match, as her hands were to tremulous. _Relax, that's the last candle, Rapunzel will be here any minute and you'll feel a lot better-_

**Click-squeak-clang**

_What in the world?_ Elsa peered over at the from door, towards the noise she had just heard, heart stopped dead in her throat and body paralyzed. _Did Rapunzel just walk in- oh, no no no no, Anna's home!_

Now in view of the living room was stood a very befuddled looking Anna. Elsa was perfectly still, as if her sibling was a starved T-rex, unable to see her prey so long as it didn't move an inch. They made eye contact for what felt like a grueling hour of interrogation, the younger's brow furrowed as she absorbed the atmosphere she had just walked in to.

Anna was in a simple green t-shirt and skinny jeans, and her hair was still _wrong._ She carried a bag, the label on which Elsa couldn't make out. "Elsa, what's all this?"

The voice sounded... Actually, Elsa couldn't even put a finger on how it sounded, her mind simply didn't have room. It was busy glossing over every escape route and the totality of their interactions over the last couple weeks. Maybe something in those moments would give a hint as to what Anna's tone meant. "It's- I- uh, nothing."

This time, the platinum blonde could ascertain the hints of emotion within her sister's words. "It clearly isn't nothing." Normally, that would come with a playful elbow, a raised eyebrow, or a self-gratified smirk, a healthy dose of frolicsomeness. It would have made the elder's heart flutter and put a silly grin on her face.

But none of that was present. Anna sounded, to some degree, irritated. Elsa winced like it was a physical blow. _Maybe she deserves to be annoyed, I did just try to avoid her question._ "It's for- it's uh-"

"For Rapunzel," Anna finished with a collision of dejectedness, jealousy, and sourness.

Elsa gulped and nodded.

Anna donned a simulacrum of a smile in an attempt to behave how she should have. But her imitation stood antithetically by the side of the zeitgeist she was trying to summon. "That's great." Her eyes were burdened with a weight that took Elsa all of half a second to identify, it was a look that was becoming all too banal: hurt. She knew as Anna's pupils took a quick sweep down then back up that she recognized the dress. Anna noticed that Elsa was taking something that was only ever for her and giving it to Rapunzel.

And it showed. The normally bright teal eyes were darkening and glistening. A candle's reflection could be seen in them as it etched away at the air. Elsa knew she was going to defray her choice that evening, if not through repercussions coming directly from the red head, then via endemic payment. It was a prickly subject, and she didn't want to hold on to it for any longer than necessary, lest it cause lasting injury, so she dropped it to the ground and thought for an awkward stretch of silence. A quietude that left the platinum blonde cowering in her spot like the craven woman she was. "So, w-what's in the bag?" Elsa pointed meekly.

Anna's eyes traced her sibling's finger to the object she had tucked away in a bag. She blinked a couple times and simply explained "a costume."

"A c-costume? Y-you're going out?"

Before the strawberry blonde could answer, Elsa's phone buzzed. It actually startled her when it broke the glass air. After hesitating for a moment, she checked it. "R-Rapunzel's here." She looked helplessly at her sister.

Anna quickly knew why she was receiving such a look and was ambivalent. She eventually, however, rolled her eyes in a way that was definitely not playful, intimated by the frown her lips sank to, and sighed "okay, I'll get the door."

The limpid distaste dripping from her sister's words just farther entrenched Elsa in her spot. Her heart plummeted into her stomach and made her sickly, tying her shoulders down in a slump. Anna was reluctant to help her. "Thanks," she muttered weakly.

Anna's expression loosened momentarily as she nodded in acknowledgment. She then went over to the door and let her old friend in. Elsa felt rapid, hammer-like pounding beneath her ribs, nervously trying to anticipate what would happen with the three of them around the house that night. She didn't want to make Anna even more angry with her, but she had to really make affection for Rapunzel. Doing both sounded utterly impossible.

"Hello? Elsa? Yoohoo." Elsa was shaken out of her thoughts and jumped as she saw green eyes peering at her.

"Wuh, uh, huh?"

Rapunzel giggled. "I said you look spooky but beautiful, Elsa."

Pale cheeks reddened at the compliment, a sensation that Elsa hadn't felt in quite some time. It was time to really set her plan in to motion. "Th-thank you." Now, she actually looked at Rapunzel. She wore a formal, pastel dress. It had a, sheer, medium cream brown skirt that stopped just above the knees, under which was an underskirt of a the same palette but a lighter shade of brown. The dress left the sleek, charming skin of Rapunzel's trimmed legs exposed. While the outer material didn't look coarse or uncomfortable, the under fabric, from what Elsa could tell, was a very fine one. Silk or satin, most likely. The top matched the color of the outer skirt, reaching modestly above her breasts and concealing any cleavage, and had short sleeves. It had humble, well balanced lace patterns scoring the surface of the body in the same shade as the underskirt. The color scheme worked to embolden her bright pink lips and contrasted green eyes, complimenting a rather tedious but ornate looking braid that hung down behind her head.

Rapunzel shrugged her shoulders to her ears in embarrassment, cheeks filling with a rich blush. "I didn't dress very 'Halloween' themed."

Elsa forced a smile as sincere as she could, but it was hard under the weight of her sister's eyes. "That's okay," she assured. Then, in a quieter voice and to the floor, hoping Anna wouldn't hear, she added "you look really pretty." She glanced up to see if the red head heard.

Rapunzel bit her lip and blushed, and Anna scowled. Elsa quailed, but also became more agitated at her sister. Anna had been out practically all week with her boyfriend, and now that Elsa had her own significant other over, Anna had a problem with it. Elsa didn't know which of the plethora of emotions fighting within her was winning.

The oldest of the three, still smiling with a goofy curve of her lips, raised her hands as if to showcase the scenery and gushed "and it looks so nice in here, what with the candle light and the fireplace going. It's very _romantic._ " she winked.

Elsa blushed until she heard Anna mumble "more like a fire hazard."

As azure eyes narrowed at such a comment, a chuckle danced from pink lips. Rapunzel had taken Anna's words as frivolous. "Yes, but it's definitely worth the risk." The green eyed woman winked at her girlfriend, causing Elsa's heart to skip a beat.

The tone of a soured voice was _crystal_ clear to all present parties with the strawberry blonde's next comment. "Whatever you say." It was dismissive. Her fists, Elsa noticed, were clenched at her sides.

"Anna, is everything okay?" Of course, all three knew it wasn't by this time.

A tawdry expression was concomitant to "of course, why wouldn't it be?" Anna also looked like she was trying to restrain something within her, but it was still able to show glimpses of itself at her surface.

Elsa didn't even notice she was literally biting her tongue until the powerfully metallic taste of blood alerted her to it. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. This wasn't a simulation, this was real life, and it was gaining on her.

Rapunzel's voice had a smattering of confrontation now, but it was well mollified by concern. "It's just that, well, you've been acting a little weird lately. Are you sure you're alright?"

"Yeah," came the insistence, followed by Anna meeting Elsa's eyes with an expression so miffed and sharp that she feared she might be skewered. She began to fight like a caged animal for air, but was also riled up like said beast. Anna continued scathingly. " _I'm_ alright."

Elsa was held in place, focus being forced upon the teal eyes burrowing in to her like an arrow, but out of the corner of her eye, she saw her girlfriend glance between her and Anna. Rapunzel capitulated. "Okay."

A warm, protective hand grabbed a cold, frightened, shaking one, and Elsa felt that power roll in from her extremity to her chest and give an edge to her anger in its battle against her fear. It wasn't much of one, but it was enough to tip the scales, as it were. _Tonight I'm going to fall in love with Rapunzel,_ she thought in retaliation to Anna's behavior, once again getting her plan back on track. It hadn't gone so well, but it hadn't derailed completely. Elsa turned to Rapunzel and pressed tightly against her so hard that she might have actually knocked the wind out of her, but she didn't care, she dug in.

She felt petite breasts against her own, she felt fingernails grab her back, she _tried_ to feel something thrilling in the embrace, she searched every corner she could find, but just wasn't seeing what she wanted. So she kissed Rapunzel, who quickly kissed back. It felt good to do that in front of Anna, not because she wanted to arouse jealousy, but because if felt like she was getting _back_ at her for something: anything, it didn't matter what. Anything Anna had done recently.

It did spawn a click of sorts in Elsa's core, but nothing major. It certainly made her heart beat faster, but there was a litany of reasons for that, the most prominent being that she couldn't stop herself from pretending that she was kissing Anna. Elsa wasn't about to give up, though, because she still had all night, and to _Hell_ with Anna, she had had just about enough of her sister's surly attitude. So she kept kissing, and parted her lips to press her tongue against Rapunzel's. She didn't really know the rules even still, but she had picked up on what to do, for the most part.

Her girlfriend's lips opened and Elsa stuck her tongue in, finding and licking the other. The smooth yet bumpy texture filled her mouth and she pulled lightly on organized blonde strands of hair, the gentle and pleasant sensation of Rapunzel's hands roaming on her back. The short lived surge of energy at knowing she was making her sister jealous felt good. When Elsa pulled away, she was panting, and Anna was practically foaming at the mouth.

Instantly, Elsa regretted her actions. She played it cool as Anna grumbled and marched angrily upstairs.

Rapunzel had a lovestruck fool's grin when she commented "well, that was a little unexpected." She elbowed Elsa. "Maybe you and Anna should argue more often."

Elsa blushed furiously but also felt piqued, both happy with how well she was fairing while downstairs and sticking to the plan, and a little bothered by Rapunzel's statement. She tried to force any negatives away, though, because being angry with Rapunzel wouldn't make falling in love with her any easier. At least now Elsa had a break from the extreme stress that a battle of wits with Anna put her under, enabling her to relax slightly. "I can be exciting sometimes."

Rapunzel winked. "You're exciting _all_ the time."

This was like their less than innocent texts, but _right there_ and Elsa didn't have as long as she needed to think of a reply. So, she just let the fire on her face burn and dropped her gaze to the floor with an embarrassed smile.

Stepping a little closer with a wry grin, the older woman said "so, do you wanna watch a _scary_ movie?"

Elsa, still flushed, looked up. "We do have a little while before I have to heat up dinner," she reasoned aloud.

"Ooh, what's for dinner?"

"That's a secret," the platinum blonde teased. She could behave with Rapunzel more like she did with Anna. Maybe that coupled with the blonde's and redhead's similar looks would help her fall for her girlfriend.

Rapunzel smiled but narrowed her eyes. "So that's how it's gonna be, huh?"

"Mhm."

"Even if I say please?" She accented her question with a puppy-dog face. It reminded Elsa of the times that Anna did that. It always got to her, always shook and weakened her will. Unfortunately, the face Elsa was looking at right now didn't really make her want to cave. She had to keep up appearances, so she inserted some raillery into her voice, though it might have sounded a little forced.

"You'll just have to wait and see."

"Oh, you're a mean one," the other woman smirked.

Relieved she had played it off the way she wanted, Elsa grinned and put on a self-satisfied face. "I know."

Rapunzel chortled and said "C'mon, let's find a movie to watch," reaching out for Elsa's hand.

Elsa took her girlfriend's hand. She looked around her house and when her lungs became stiff, focused on the ground beneath her feet. Anna definitely wouldn't come back out. Elsa knew that her sister was fulminating safely away in her room, probably mentally spitting vitriol about how Elsa had chosen _that_ dress _._

Elsa still had an uneasy feeling in her gut, though.

* * *

They were laying down, well into a movie that Elsa wasn't paying a particularly large amount of attention to because of how fidgety she was. _Throw yourself at her,_ Elsa had reminded herself. So, she was leaning on Rapunzel's shoulder and had her hand on a shapely thigh. It rested uncertainly at first, but when she noticed the light smile it earned, Elsa rested her hand more confidently. She'd rub said leg every now and then, which almost always elicited a tranquil purr from the older woman.

During the more frightening moments of the flick, the platinum blonde would squeeze said leg, and she noticed once that her hand had drifted farther up than she thought, being more than halfway up Rapunzel's thigh, encroaching a little under the hem of a brown skirt. She herself was uncomfortable with the situation when she noticed, and was about to fix it, but then remembered what she was supposed to be doing. She gauged her girlfriend to see if she was bothered, and was given an answer when Rapunzel put her hand on top of Elsa's and brushed her thumb over Elsa's knuckles.

So Elsa kept her hand there and had a pretty good idea about what _exactly_ her significant other was feeling right then. It was given away by the excited smile and mild nibbling of pink lips, by Rapunzel's transparent disinterest in the movie and the unconscious brushing of platinum hair when they shared eye contact.

If Elsa were in Rapunzel's spot and it was _Anna's_ hand on her thigh, rubbing her skin and squeezing tight, Elsa would be more than a little aroused by it. She'd probably be fending off a thundering heart and lecherous beg. Even when she pretended it was her sister's leg that she was touching for brief moments, she'd have a salacious reaction.

Speak- or rather think- of the Devil, and he shall appear, though, and Elsa was left with little time to ponder her questions. Heavy footsteps and a proud sounding declaration of "I'm going out now" made Elsa jump out of her skin.

Rapunzel calmed her down. Elsa held her breath and they both hesitantly looked back.

Elsa's eyes _actually_ popped out of her skull. Her mouth dried so rapidly that she was sure her tongue would turn to dust, and her heart worked so fast that it felt like it was stopped. For a moment there was no noise. No movie in the background, no fire crackling, nothing, just _sight_ so that Elsa's brain could use every last bit of power to focus on what she was seeing.

Anna was in _quite_ the Halloween costume. Her top was plaid red and black, consisting of just a much too small button-down shirt with the highest several buttons undone, the hem tied around her ribcage, leaving from just below her breasts to underneath her belly button completely bare. The top was open in a "V" formation, revealing breasts that had been pushed together and up to make nice, rounded mounds. The sleeves were long, but _nothing_ else. Over her shoulders were slung overall straps, outlining her abdomen, which was smooth as satin and had sparse freckles.

Her pants- or rather mini shorts- were an embarrassment to overalls. They came to a halt once they did their job in covering Anna's backside, leaving more area than ever before for Elsa to drink up. They were a dull yet dark blue, along with their straps. To top it all off, the young woman wore mountaineer boots. Elsa had a hard time ripping her stare away from Anna's navel, especially considering how the red head was standing: resting on one straightened leg, hip cocked to the side, hand perched almost sensually on her waist, and quite an attitude on her face.

Fiery hair was once again pulled back in the way that Elsa was beginning to despise, covered by a woolen hat fit for a mountaineer. Elsa surmised that that's what the costume was supposed to be: a mountain woman. It failed in all functionality, obviously. It'd never be warm enough to brave such a terrain, let alone protect her from abrasions, bugs, and animals! It did, however, succeed with flying colors at spawning a demanding heat between Elsa's legs. She'd never seen Anna so exposed. She could feel libidinous desires pressurizing between her legs, felt the dampness they produced in hungry anticipation for what her entire body was _aching_ to happen next.

Good God, Elsa couldn't breathe, the outfit was controlling her like a puppet, which might be _exactly_ what Anna wanted. That must have been what she bought earlier that afternoon. Surprising both other women, but mostly herself, the platinum blonde burst "in _that!?_ " Before anyone else could speak.

Anna cocked her head to the side and focused her attention on Elsa. With a wicked, self-assured grin, she said "yes. Do you have a problem with that?"

Elsa gulped. She was gonna faint. She was gonna _die._ Her diaphragm was so insolently uncooperative that she started seeing red spots in her field of view. "I- uh- I- just- it's just- uh, won't you be c-cold?" At least she found _some_ kind of objection that didn't make it sound like she wanted nothing more than to rip those shorts off right then, right there.

Glaring eyes and a vile smile made clear the fact that Anna's next words were intended, undoubtedly, to hurt. "I'm sure Hans will keep me plenty warm."

They hit their mark. Elsa recoiled and her eyes misted, obscuring the pleasurable sight of her sister a little. Luckily, Rapunzel responded for her. "I'll keep my _girlfriend_ warm while you're out, don't worry." She put her arm around Elsa's back, her digits resting upon flexed sides.

Anna looked bothered by this, but she kept chary. "I'll just have to see my _sister_ later." The women stared each other down, both sizing the situation and trying to keep ahead of the other's wit. It seemed a little petty for either one, but based on Anna's attitude over the last week or so, it mostly seemed beneath Rapunzel.

That's why Elsa was actually relieved when the woman on the couch with her and sizing green eyes forfeited the duel, to an extent. "Just don't do anything stupid." Her words had an edge to them, but it was dull and ill-kept.

Anna was taken aback, emphasizing herself by placing both hands on her hips. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means just don't do anything you might regret, okay?" The hand on Elsa's side began to trace circles on her back, as if the deliberate shape created by such an act would bring order to the chaos of her mind and body.

"What could I possibly do with _Hans_ that I'll regret?" When she said her boyfriend's name, the youngest of the trio glanced at her sister. Didn't breaking focus on her discussion and looking at Elsa mean that Anna was thinking about her when she said that? Elsa was fairly certain it did, otherwise, why look? Plus, even though Ann looked certain while facing Rapunzel, just for a split second when she turned her attention to Elsa, the confidence in her eyes fractured. The glance and the uncertainty Anna showed meant that she, on some level, linked Hans and Elsa together. That made sense, they were the two biggest people in Anna's life, but was there another reason?

"You never know," Rapunzel said with a certain amount of implication.

Anna pursed her lips, clearly angry, but also thinking. She eventually looked between her two foes and huffed. She then gave Elsa a trenchant, harsh, scolding, and jealous look and addressed her directly. "You'd better not do anything you'll regret, either."

It was an outright command, not a request. Like a sergeant to a private, she was telling Elsa what to do, telling her to behave. It intimidated the platinum blonde to the point of stupefaction and subpoenaed a fit of terror that always dwelt near the surface, so that it might act faster. She fought dyspnea. How _dare_ Anna tell her what to do, though! After all the lies, after _everything_ , she had the audacity to tell Elsa how to conduct herself! Elsa's body was tremulous in fear and fury, but her tongue was tied by the former. So she remained silent.

She was anxious in wonderment about where Anna was going and what she'd be doing, but that, for the time being, took a back seat.

When the red filter was removed enough for Elsa to see again, she saw her sister turn around, chin up, and march away. And _wow,_ those hips. The natural sway in them made Anna's generous backside vie competently for attention. Her shorts hugged her curves tightly, and the all too familiar smarting between Elsa's legs and hotness on her chest returned as she watched her sister walk away.

Then, Anna was gone, swallowed by the horrible, extra-central world, and Elsa was just staring at where she had been for a moment. _I'll do whatever I please,_ she thought in vengeance. Shortly, Rapunzel spoke up. "I'm sure she'll be fi- agh- mmm."

Elsa had jumped on her girlfriend, smashing their lips together. She was pretty sure that she bruised something somewhere or other, but that didn't matter. For now, she need Anna _off_ her mind, and Rapunzel _on_ her mind. So she made out with her.

Rapunzel's hand inched its way up Elsa's thigh, cautiously ferreting for the hold she wanted. It left tingles wherever it went. It breached the hem of her skirt and came a little close to her backside, however. Elsa tensed and although she was a little disconcerted by it, let it happen.

* * *

When both started to get hungry a little while later, Elsa popped in the stuffed peppers she had prepared earlier into the oven. Soon enough, they were seated at the table, across from one another, in the low, uneven candle light. The gentle scent of said candles hung soothingly in the air, their flames dancing like merry couples. Elsa imagined that had she been eating with Anna, they'd be next to each other. It was just passing sunset out, so the night was starting to come alive with tiny tots out on the hunt for free candy.

Elsa wasn't entirely present, though. She smiled and said "thanks" when Rapunzel guffawed and excitedly proclaimed how cute the jack-o-lantern themed peppers were, she stayed just engaged enough in conversation with her companion to keep it alive, and she ate slowly but surely. Now that her mind was free to wander, she wasn't exactly hungry, but she forced bites down here and there to keep appearances up.

Her mind was on Anna. Where she was, what she was doing, what the remnants of their once rich relationship looked like and if it was salvageable. Elsa didn't know what exactly she was feeling. There were the obvious components: choler, sorrow, anxiety, and loneliness; but there were more there, and she couldn't put her finger on them. Maybe it was simply indecisiveness, Elsa's inability to decide which emotion she _wanted_ to feel. And that was the worst part: she didn't know if she _wanted_ her relationship with Anna to be redeemable because she didn't know if she could survive the one-sided love, especially with how things had been going.

She needed Anna, yes. She loved Anna in the deepest, truest way possible, sure, but after all the pain that love had caused, Elsa thought she might want to cut ties. It was Rapunzel that initially made Elsa consider moving on from Anna, but maybe, in light of recent events, even if Rapunzel wasn't in the picture, burning the bridge was the best idea. Maybe Elsa should still move on.

 _But then what would I have? I'd have nothing!_ The platinum blonde nearly choked on her forkful of food, gagging at the idea of no Anna. Even their strained, stressful, and minimal contact provided some kind of remedy to Elsa's mind. Then, there was the matter of Hans. Elsa didn't trust him, _especially_ with her sister. She couldn't just abandon Anna and leave her in what could be a detrimental relationship! Why was life so _hard!?_ She sniffled and looked up, meeting dark green, very concerned eyes. "I know you're worried about her. She's going to be okay."

Elsa reckoned that Rapunzel was right to an extent, because it did calm down one sector of her brain or another. She gave a half-hearted smile. "Thank you, I know, I just, I..."

"You're stressed."

"Is it that obvious?" Elsa sounded more self conscious than she intended to.

"Only if you're paying as much attention as I am," the older said with a softness to her voice. The platinum blonde blushed and looked off to the side. Rapunzel continued, reaching across the table and grabbing pale hands in her own. "I'm here for you, Elsa."

Looking up, now on the verge of tears, Elsa dove through the window to her girlfriend's soul. She could see everything Rapunzel had to offer, but hadn't said, she could taste the replete emotions and plunge into the unbridled depth they owned. She couldn't help but wonder one thing: why was she still not falling in love?

The doorbell rang, making Elsa jump in her seat and snapping her attention to the door. Still, it was a welcome interruption, because the line she was just balancing on was perilous and unpredictable.

Rapunzel looked, too, then back to Elsa. "Should I get it?"

"Yes, um, yeah, I- I have some c-candy here." Elsa snapped out of it and nearly tripped over herself in haste for retrieving the tasty treats.

She handed the bag over to Rapunzel, who smiled and made sure their fingers caressed one another. The older then swung the door open to a chorus of "trick or treat!" Elsa wrapped her arms around her waist to shield herself from the terrors of the outdoors and watched from afar. She spied as Rapunzel giggled and complimented two young kids, who were bouncing in place, on their costumes, then gave them each some candies.

One was a little boy, who, from where Elsa stood, was no older than six or so. He wore an adorable snowman costume that even made his arms look like anamorphic sticks. Next to him was another boy, slightly older, who had on a simple reindeer costume. It was more Christmas-y, Elsa mused, but that didn't matter. The kids were out having fun with their father: her neighbor Oaken, a giant of a jolly man standing proudly behind his sons.

 _Out_ having fun. Wandering the streets, sneaking sweets, not a care in the world. Elsa remembered her days of trick-or-treating, before their mother passed. It was always perfect, with little Anna trotting beside her and her father, mother, or both guiding them around the neighborhood. She missed that. She missed being _outside_ , she missed having a _family._

Her heart howled in agony with a voice so truculent that it tightened her stomach and reduced it to nothing but a pit of putrid, toxic garbage with an offshoot more foul than a skunk's stink. Elsa breathed forcefully and wiped a newly formed tear from her hot, puffing eyes. She wanted to get better.

But there was no time to linger on the subject. The door was shut and Rapunzel was coming back. It was time for dessert. She instructed Rapunzel to take a seat while she retrieved the cake. She put in on a plate and, before leaving the kitchen, thought about putting aside a piece for Anna. She caught sight of the sink, in front of which Hans hounded her all those weeks ago. Her mind linked that to when Anna failed to defend her, and her eyes narrowed. That alone wasn't enough to stop Elsa from putting some away for Anna, but coupled with how the red head was so _controlling_ earlier, it was. She took the cake to the dining room table where her girlfriend was waiting and served them each a slice.

Rapunzel grinned at Elsa and took a testing bite. She hummed in delight and chewed, her face obeying euphoria. "Mmm."

When they made eye contact, the younger forced a smile. It was nice having someone else approve of your baking, but it was a whole other thing to have _Anna_ approve of it. Rapunzel's reaction made Elsa happy with her cake, but not happy with _herself._ She found herself simply wanting to tuck away into her room. Instead, she forced a few bites of dessert into a less than cooperative stomach. Even her esophagus seemed to push the food the wrong way.

"Elsa," Rapunzel said in a slightly drawn out voice.

The white-blonde looked up to meet teasing eyes with a smirk below them. She furrowed her brows. "Yes?"

The other woman giggled and tried to cover it with her fingertips. "You've got a little frosting." She pointed to the corner of her own mouth.

Elsa's eyes went wide and she hastily grabbed a napkin in hopes of removing any offending food fragments from her face, but Rapunzel interrupted. "It's fine, don't worry, I'll get it."

"Oh, uh..." Elsa froze in front of the flirtatious expression. Her heart stalled if only for discomfort, not arousal. She just sat still as a gentle finger slid against the corner of her lips, delicate as a fine artist's paint brush. It tickled a little, but Elsa lacked the deep red hue that Rapunzel had when she performed her action.

She then stuck the frosted finger into her own mouth, sucking on it in a heavily mischievous way, her flush now concealing her freckles. Elsa imagined for a flaring second that it was her sister sitting before her. She nearly fainted at the butterflies it hatched in her stomach and heat wave it pushed on her chest. Unfortunately, chimerical blue-green eyes lost their cyan touch and she was left disappointed with reality.

That's when Elsa began searching for the proper way to give up.

* * *

By later that evening, Elsa hadn't made any headway on her predicament. Should she break up with Rapunzel? If she did, how? She didn't know if there was right or wrong way to go about it. She knew she didn't want to hurt Rapunzel, because she still considered her a very dear and important friend, but she didn't know if it was possible to cut off their relationship without some sort of collateral damage to their friendship.

Actually, Elsa was damn sure deep down that breaking up was the only option, she just didn't want to admit it because it would sire conflict, and that worried her. Never mind the resentment and sorrow. Even more going on in her life wouldn't be good. But, even if it didn't complicate things, when would be the least sordid moment to drop the bomb? _Should I do it tonight and get it over with? Should I wait for the right time? Will any time_ ever _feel right?_

These questions were precisely why Elsa played along for the remainder of dessert and after that. They drained her mind of its analytical skills and forced auto pilot upon her body. As a result, she was just sitting with Rapunzel on the couch in front of the fire, indecisive as to what to do, and part hoping that Rapunzel would find it time to take her leave. That way, Elsa didn't _have_ to do anything. She could just run back to her room and silently complain all night.

That is, until a serious yet shy voice pulled her back. "Hey, um, honey?" Rapunzel was fiddling with her fingers, looking between the platinum blonde and her lap, skittish and unsure of herself.

Now distrustful of her own instincts telling her to pay attention, the platinum blonde said "yes, Rapunzel?"

"I, um- ehem- I want to tell you something." Rapunzel meekly made eye contact, head still tilted slightly down and tips of her fingers white from squeezing too hard. The pusillanimous attitude coupled with the genuine, weighty air between them made Elsa want to not let this happen. But she couldn't just say _no_.

"W-what is it?" Elsa's heart was beating rapidly. Whatever this was, she was sure she wouldn't like it. Her mind was alight with swirling possibilities. _Is it about my phobia? Is it about our relationship!? What if it's about my feelings for_ Anna _!?_

It seemed to take hours, the answer. Elsa had to wait in apprehension as ice enclosed her feet and Rapunzel grabbed her hands in a newly intimate way. It was just... different. More tender perhaps, more care given to the fingers and palms. She had to stand by as green eyes locked with hers, purposefully letting Elsa look all the way in. "I," Rapunzel finally muttered in a tremulous, breathy voice, "I love you."


	11. Passion and Dissent

_Oh no, no no no._ Elsa froze and just stood there breathless like she had just been sucker-punched in the stomach. Her little plan to fall for Rapunzel that night had failed, but she had led Rapunzel on. _How did I not see this coming? I shouldn't have done this, I shouldn't have even started dating her! All it's going to bring her is pain..._

For what she'd done, Elsa felt entirely undeserving of love. She gasped for breath. She thought of Anna. She pondered moving on versus staying chained like a dog on a leash. She felt the forlorn agony she'd experienced recently, and she wished, she _wished,_ her heart belonged to Rapunzel, not Anna. Because there Rapunzel was, displaying her sensitive core of emotions. There she was, romantically loving Elsa. But Anna, Anna was distancing herself. Being nasty, scathing, and corrosive: being cruel.

Elsa shuddered because her diaphragm wouldn't relax. "I- I... I..."

Rapunzel started to panic. "Did I go too far? Was that too soon? I'm sorry Elsa, I- I should've waited until I was sure you're comfortable!" Her eyes were beginning to tear up now.

The younger of the two remained mute because she really had no idea what to say. She was at such a loss for words that it felt like she was _actually_ lost. So, Rapunzel continued in her emotional, trepidatious state. "W-we can wait until you're ready! I- I don't want you to feel pressured."

Looking on in shame, Elsa scanned the entire evening, her failure, and tried to work out what to say. She didn't love Rapunzel, but what would happen if she lied? _No, you can't do that to her!_ It didn't make sense, hiding the truth from Rapunzel just to make her happy, when there'd be much, much worse consequences later on. Now all Elsa had to do was figure out how to put what she was feeling into words.

Luckily, it seemed that Elsa's face told the truth for her. Tears were audible in Rapunzel's voice and she started trembling. Her eyes were glistening when she looked at her girlfriend. "You- you don't love me back, d-do you?"

Elsa felt hot tears building up around her eyes. She had to sniffle during the brief silence, and hugged herself. Her heart was clawing for dear life. "I'm s-so sorry."

Then, Rapunzel was trying _so hard_ to hold back tears. She was desperately pushing away the pain she was feeling, trying to put it aside. But her eyes were watering, her lip was trembling, and her mouth was in a painful looking, desperate smile. She was pushing as hard as she could _just_ so that Elsa wouldn't feel bad. But it didn't work, because Elsa could still see the howling, wounded animal inside. She could see the blow she'd just dealt.

And maybe all the fighting was what made it feel so much worse. Elsa didn't feel like she deserved such tender love and care. _I deserve to be slapped, or yelled at. Something!_

Instead of a swing back, she heard a tremulous, sincere, quiet voice. "D-don't be," Rapunzel sniffled. "We can't control w-who we l-love." A gentle tickle traversed the platinum blonde's cheek as Rapunzel reached up and wiped some stray tears away.

Elsa clutched the hand and closed her eyes, savoring it with a cold shudder. "If only we could," she whispered with her eyes closed. Then, Elsa could choose Rapunzel, someone who _definitely_ loved her back. She'd still have a sister in Anna, but with none of the guilt, no more being dragged around by the neck, no more stabs in the heart. Then, Elsa would be _normal,_ she'd be _happy._ She could barely talk through the tenseness of her throat being plugged by her heart. "B-because I'd ch-choose you."

"Oh, Elsa," Rapunzel gasped and was suddenly clinging tightly to her, welcoming her into a hug despite all of the pain Elsa had delivered. It wasn't a demanding or angry hug, it wasn't done out of courtesy only. It was loving, forgiving, and understanding. It was gentle and firm, it was exactly the soft rock that Elsa needed in that moment. Elsa just had to wonder if Rapunzel was being so forgiving because of her phobia. Maybe, when she got home, the green eyed woman would let everything out of her system, because there was definitely _something_ to unleash.

She clutched her ex-girlfriend, gritting her teeth and loudly letting sobs prevail. She could feel her own shoulder dampen as Rapunzel gasped by her ear and sniffled. "I'm sorry," was all Elsa could muster over and over again, and over and over again it didn't make her feel any better.

"There's nothing to be s-sorry about," Rapunzel breathed into the hug.

Elsa clenched her teeth as if silently bearing through intense physical torture. "I- I h-hurt you."

Rapunzel was now sitting up on the couch, grabbing Elsa's sleeve. Her voice was scolding. "Is that all you think I'll hold on to from this? From us?"

Withholding a rebuttal, Elsa retreated a few inches in her place and looked away. Her ashamed behavior was apparently enough of an answer, because a tender hand cupped her cheek and veered her focus back to the blonde right by her.

"Yes, it hurts right now, and I'm _angry_ , I feel like you betrayed me, and it's easy to think about the pain, but-" Elsa winced and swallowed a sob. She upbraided herself for subjecting Rapunzel to such a profligate use of time, for turning around and stabbing Rapunzel in the back in almost the exact same way that Anna had done to her. She had swindled Rapunzel for her emotions, and to achieve what? To toss it all like a wilting flower. But Rapunzel continued. "-but I'll always remember how happy you made me, too."

Elsa felt like a rotting piece of garbage. She had _really_ made an impact on Rapunzel.

The older woman smiled genuinely as a tear trickled down her face. "Eventually, I'll be able to focus on the good times."

Elsa couldn't hold her emotions back anymore. She lurched forward with a cry. Her heart was trembling but full, and the irony of the situation was not lost on her. There she was, having just broken up with Rapunzel, and Rapunzel was comforting _her._ "I'm sorry, Rapunzel," she whispered again, "and th-thank you for n-not yelling at m-me." The older nodded in response.

All in all, though, she had apparently made Rapunzel happy, and it seemed as though soon there wouldn't be any resentment floating between the two of them. Elsa was relieved about this, and her mind drew a parallel to Anna. Had Anna made her happy? Yes, happier than anything else ever had. So, even if Anna had recently been dealing blow after blow to her older sister's heart, could Elsa still just focus on the fond times?

Elsa's heart said yes, but her brain said no, because there were definitely some differences between the relationships she was comparing. In lieu of words, the platinum blonde leaned forward for a hug, and for a moment she felt tranquil. She was, however, in the eye of a storm, because moments later a realization hit her like the second wall of a hurricane: although she hadn't damaged her and Rapunzel's friendship in a way that was noticeable just yet, Rapunzel would certainly need some time before getting back to the way things used to be. Anna was still hostile, leaving Elsa with exactly no one.

It became painfully obvious to Elsa as she was held in the warm, caring embrace of Rapunzel's that she had _nobody._

* * *

Elsa clutched tightly to her phone. Anna was still out. Elsa was held up in her room, it had been a couple of hours since her and Rapunzel broke it off, and she had run directly to her own personal safe haven once Rapunzel left. She couldn't stand being downstairs, it might as well have been an extension of the outside world, a gnarly growth on the monster of her phobia.

Her mind and heart were forcing her body asunder, tugging violently at the rope between them. Her heart, her poor, loving organ, wanted to call Anna. She wanted a connection, not just any shoulder to cry on, but specifically _Anna's_. Her feelings were invigorated by what Rapunzel had said about focusing on the positives. Even though Anna hurt her, Elsa still loved her, Elsa still _needed_ her.

But her mind said no. Every logical bone in her body urged her not to call, to suffer in silence, to not look passed what Anna had done. So she laid curled up on her bed, clutching her phone with blanched knuckles and tears staining her pillow and face. She was dizzy from her erratic, breathless breathing, choking on a lump in her throat.

During a particularly loud outcry of Elsa's, her brain cheated and commanded her hands to throw the phone across the room. It thudded against the ground, far out of reach while Elsa sobbed loudly, no one to hear her cries.

 _I should call her, she'll understand! Or she'll get annoyed at you interrupting her time with Hans. He has her wrapped around his little finger! But I'm her_ sister _! She wouldn't be annoyed if I needed her, would she?_ An absolutely terrifying thought followed, one that sent icy cold chills down Elsa's spine. _She wasn't there for me last time Hans was over, what if she's not this time?_

Elsa rolled over and howled into her pillows. She managed to will herself from calling Anna, but her fomented agony kept her awake late into the night. Late enough that she heard her father get home. She knew it was him, because shortly after the front door closed, another door downstairs closed; his room door. She was so desperate that she thought for just a second that maybe _he_ could help. But that thought just hurt more than it helped.

Finally, well into the night, the platinum blonde still unable to get any soporific activity, the front door once again opened and closed. Elsa went as still as a statue, listening like a rabbit for predators. She started hyperventilating as footsteps climbed the stairs, and nearly passed out.

The room was spinning, and even though she was terrified she'd be rejected by her sister, her heart called loud enough that it took hold of her tongue momentarily. "Ah-Anna," she rasped passed unpracticed vocal cords.

The sounds in the hallway stopped. There was a tense moment of silence. Elsa felt like she was in an old mine, just waiting for the creaking supports to snap and the world to tumble down on top of her. Then, a little unsure, came the quiet volley. "Elsa?"

A sniffle and a hitched moan were all the older managed, as she was unsure if she was making a mistake or not.

"Elsa, you're up?"

Squeezing her eyes shut so tightly that she saw stars, Elsa gave her next option a metric ton of thought. She wanted to believe Anna would be there for her. She eventually built up her will-power and wined "y-yes," in a clearly distressed voice.

She could almost feel her sister's presence right outside the door. "Well- well, can I come in?" She sounded concerned, genuinely worried.

The verisimilitude in Anna's voice allotted Elsa the strength to follow through. "Yes," she agreed.

"Okay," came the notification. Elsa's heart clenched like vice grips on her lungs and she almost cracked her own teeth with how hard she was biting. The increasingly rapid, deafening pumping of Elsa's heart under the pressure of impending suffering rang her ears, only to be halted by the anticlimactic swoosh of her door. The dead silence, the space between space as Anna walked in.

Elsa's breath hitched as she couldn't help but notice that her sister was dressed in the same costume, but she didn't appear to have an attitude. At least, not right now. Anna's brows were creased, her lower lip being nibbled, and although her eyes looked halfway between concerned and curious, it was enough for Elsa to grab hold of. The elder's eyes misted and burned and she gasped out "Anna," because she finally could once again.

Anna thought for a couple seconds, and looked almost suspiciously at Elsa, her voice just as distrusting. "What's wrong?" Despite her checking her steps like she was walking on ice, Anna was vividly affected by seeing her sister cry. The younger girl swallowed and tensed, her eyes loosening in place just a slight amount.

"I, um," Elsa stuttered, both wanting and loathing to tell the truth. "I just..."

Anna sighed. "Elsa, could you please just tell me what it is?" She sounded a little impatient with her sister.

Taking in a deep breath, the platinum blonde reasoned with herself. _She was always jealous around Rapunzel, right? So there's no_ way _she'll get mad at me for breaking up with her!_ "I- we- me and Rapunzel, we-"

Anna looked like a spring that could fly off in any direction, ready to pounce on whatever emotion was best suited for the situation. "You..."

Elsa hid behind her eyelids. "We b-broke up." And after everything, after Anna's mendacity, it still felt like throwing a hundred pounds off of her shoulders for Elsa to confide even a small amount in her sister.

There was a reticent moment so delicate that it could be broken by a pin's breath. Anna's nearly inaudible exhale sufficed. According to her intonation, the red head chose to grasp on to sympathy from all the options she had. "You guys- you're- you- Elsa, I'm so sorry."

Not knowing what to do, the platinum blonde just lay there, under her covers, and was grateful that she was receiving compassion rather than dissent. Anna took a testing step forward, the act causing Elsa to stiffen like a corpse and her inexorable heart to pound once again. She was sure, however, not to dissuade her younger sister.

Anna sat down on the side of the bed, eyebrows still pressing together in solicitude, and took a quick breath in. Elsa sniffled and wiped a few tears away. She felt like a puppy begging for mercy at the foot of an angry, hungry bear. She scanned all of the exposed skin _right there,_ on _her_ bed.

"Are um," Anna started, "are you okay?"

Elsa had to think, _really_ think about that question. It had deeper implications than just her recently halted relationship. It sounded like an inquiry on the whole of Elsa's struggle, not a simple question about her and Rapunzel. So, Elsa considered everything she was going through, and then had to wonder what answer she should give Anna. _I_ should _tell the truth, that I'm not okay._ Even so, there was a part of Elsa that wanted to lie. The ravine had been dug between the two and Elsa wasn't sure the rickety bridge between them would hold her weight if she crossed now.

In what she knew may very well turn out to be an invidious choice, the older girl whispered "yeah" through gritted teeth and a sniffle.

Anna pursed her lips, taking Elsa's hand with immense care, as if it was made of thin glass and would break at the slightest touch. "Are you sure?"

Elsa squeezed her eyes shut. She saw lights dancing beneath her eyelids, she heard the call of wind rushing by her window, she felt the proliferating warmth from Anna's touch prickle all the way up her arm and plant its seed in her heart. She felt the adrenaline, the fear, the loathing, and the _love_ of being so close to her sister. She felt the wistful pang as she compared this moment to before, when Anna would hug her and make her feel like she was safe.

Elsa _missed_ Anna. Right then, she felt like everything could go back, it would be so easy for her to slip right back down and exonerate everything Anna had done.

But it still hurt too much. The heavy, tiring reality that Anna was with Hans and just wasn't defending Elsa like she used to do hurt. The fact that she had lied and _still_ lied stung, and Elsa couldn't let that go. So, as she sobbed a little, she rather unconvincingly stated "yeah, I'll live."

Opening her eyes, Elsa met what appeared to be midnight blue eyes looking at her, viewing passed her front and trying to uncover the truth. Anna _always_ knew when Elsa was lying. But instead of insisting, rather than keep prodding her sister for an unmasked answer, the red head looked away and nodded while chewing on her lip. She released Elsa's hand, a gesture that carried more weight than Atlas, and said "okay. Well, if you need me, let me know."

Elsa felt like a royal fool. She had denied Anna the truth, and as a result, Anna rejected her. It wasn't in the words, they sounded genuine, but the hints were in her actions. Letting go of Elsa's hand, no longer providing such support, _physically_ separating the two. When she entered the room, Anna looked worried for her sister. Now, however, she simply looked disappointed. Elsa lied and she was paying for it. She couldn't even swallow passed the lump in her throat while Anna got up to leave.

As the younger woman arrived at the room's threshold, she spared one last look back. Elsa couldn't see her expression in the dark from that far away, but it did give her just enough time to patch as much of what she had just shattered as she could. "Always," she whispered, definitely loud enough for Anna to hear.

There was an audible gulp, then the door swung shut. Elsa rolled over and clamped her teeth on her lip until she tasted a trace of blood. She had only made things worse.

* * *

Elsa kept her mouth shut for weeks. She stayed in her room all day every day, not daring to leave. She hid and relished in the sounds of Anna getting home, she listened to her sister move about. Something about just knowing she was there helped somehow. It also stung, because Elsa knew she was too weak to go out there and fix it all.

But she could live with that, for now, at least. The first thing that really, _really_ hurt Elsa happened the Wednesday after her and Rapunzel broke up. Well, actually, it was what _didn't_ happen that affected her. Elsa had been waiting in her room all day, wondering how she was going to even get close to her goggles; stressing about it and dreading it. She knew that just like every week, when Anna got home from classes, she'd be forced into wearing her virtual reality goggles and trying to walk around in them.

That was going to happen, it always had. She was also earnestly anticipating it. Not because she wanted to go anywhere near her goggles, but because it was an excuse to spend time with Anna. That evening, however, when Elsa heard her sister get home, even though she prepared for the call, tried to be ready for it, it never happened. Anna walked by the door and into her own room, stopping only briefly outside of Elsa's.

Elsa thought about calling out, about asking why that happened, but she didn't. She already knew the reason. It was solidifying proof that Anna had _actually_ given up.

* * *

That same evening, when Elsa was washing for bed, she stopped and dared to take stock of her reflection. At first she saw the physical: the small frown, the tired eyes, and the slumped shoulders. That was fairly straightforward, but what really scared her was what she saw when she really _looked_ at herself.

Before, she was able to use the lens of Anna and uncover someone who had hope, someone who was fighting for something. Now, she herself saw a body desiccate of hope and starved for affection, untrammeled loneliness that had overgrown like a jungle around ancient ruins.

She tried to change the look, she used every angle she could, but it was no use. When she tried to once again imagine what her sister saw, it backfired severely. She was hoping to find something good, but the light of recent events illuminated one singular thing. An inescapable truth that would haunt Elsa forever if she wasn't careful: she saw a failure. She saw someone who had tried, but not hard enough, and then slipped back down and gave up. Someone who wouldn't amount to anything and _couldn't_ amount to anything.

Simplistically, Elsa decided that she truly saw _herself._ She didn't sleep that night.

* * *

Elsa's grades even started to pay for her depression. She couldn't focus on her assignments and couldn't find the attention to read her full lectures, making her school work unusually challenging. Her mind always wandered to Anna: where she was, what she was doing, _how_ she was doing. The worst were the times when Elsa played over every mistake she had made in her mind, mentally backtracking and patching the flaws, perfectly oiling and fixing the machine of their relationship.

But she was always reminded that that was a fantasy, no matter how much she desired it to be reality. She _had_ made mistakes, she _had_ torn apart her relationship with her sister. It always made Elsa choke up with tears.

On one such afternoon, in mid-November, she was mulling, feeling sorry for herself. She was wearing a plain t-shirt and sweatpants. What was the point of dressing up for Anna anymore? Elsa dressed for comfort. She heard someone get home. At this time, it was usually Anna, so she put her ear against her headboard in hopes of hearing better. She _needed_ it.

Heavy footsteps. They didn't sound like Anna's. _Is it dad?_

The platinum blonde got her answer when a specious voice faintly resonated through the wood of her bed. "Is Elsa home?" She could taste Hans's pride at his distasteful, rude joke. He sounded highly sarcastic.

There was little silence allotted for Elsa to spit vitriol, though. "Duh, she's in her room like always." Anna sounded... she sounded... _annoyed._ Not disappointed. That would indicate that she thought Elsa was capable of more. Not sad; that'd show that she still sympathized with Elsa. Just annoyed, which meant that she was still _angry_ with her sister, and that she wasn't expecting much out of her.

Elsa whimpered, her lip trembling and eyes wetting. Her breathing became erratic. "Ah yes, of course, I should've thought of that."

"Well," Anna said, "she _can_ be so invisible, it's easy to forget."

Elsa tuned out of the conversation, she didn't care about it anymore. It felt like she had just been sucker punched in the heart by the Hulk. Her sister's words literally knocked the wind out of her, and she began fighting for oxygen as a panic attack secured her neck in its strong hands and shook her body violently.

She tried to keep her suffering quiet, but a brief, loud whine came from her, after which she bit her pillow. _Does Anna even think about me anymore? Does she care about me?_ So far, all hints pointed towards no.

* * *

The very next day, Elsa was putting on a brave face to walk down the hallway to the restroom. She was dressed similar to the manner in which she had the previous day. She was gathering her wits like provisions for a long journey.

Her bedroom door was foreboding, she was forlorn, standing hamstrung as she entered a staring contest with the object. _All I have to do is walk quickly through the hallway, into the bathroom, and out. That's all, I can do it._ Elsa would be lying to herself if she said there was no part of her that wanted to bump into Anna on the way. Even passed the injury and brutalization, she was still hooked on _some_ kind of interaction. Up until that point, Elsa had only dared to listen, to just know where her sister was, or occasionally what she was doing. Never talking, never seeing, just hiding and thriving off of the scraps of Anna's life, seeking the false feeling of sharing something with her.

Yes, Elsa knew it was foolhardy, she was aware of just how pathetic and parasitic her life had become. She eked by, not happily, but she did it.

And now it was time to leave her room for a brief moment, time to expose herself. Elsa took a deep, tremulous breath and grabbed the handle. It seemed to repel her hand in disgust, but she held as firmly as she could, rattling the contraption as she spun it. She shut her eyes and rushed through the hall, adrenaline on overdrive. If she didn't look up, she couldn't see everything around her, and as long as she couldn't see it, she could sort of ignore it.

Unless it's something that you happen to physically bump in to. Something soft, warm, something that squeals when you hit it.

Elsa's heart dropped. She had just gotten to the bathroom door when it opened up and Anna came out, causing them to collide. "Agh, Elsa!"

The platinum blonde looked up, cowering. There was a brief pause where Anna looked like she had to repeat what had just happened in her head a few times, just to make sure it was real. She was processing the fact that she'd seen Elsa outside of the room.

After gaining her bearings and blinking a couple times, Anna made eye contact, which Elsa shied away from, and scolded "watch where you're going!"

Nothing came out for a stressful second, even as the elder tried to talk. "I- I'm s-s-sorry," she stuttered. Elsa felt small in front of her sister, but at the same time, just seeing her empowered or fed some deep-rooted desires within. It was like a drug for Elsa's dependence, a small meal for the starving, wasted side of her that fed solely off of her and Anna's relationship.

That didn't change how mortifying it was, though. Elsa's heart had all but stopped and she was holding her breath.

Anna had apparently moved on in the conversation, because her next inquiry rocketed out of the blue and slapped Elsa square in the face. "What in the world are you wearing?"

Elsa folding her arms over her stomach in defense and nearly started crying. She felt about as sturdy as a wet paper towel and Anna was ready to roughhouse with her, and _not_ in a good way. Elsa's words sputtered in and out just like her breath. "I- It's- I just- just c-comfortable clothes." Talking when her brain was this scrambled felt, to Elsa, like trying to create a sentence with alphabet soup by stirring it and hoping it arranges itself into something intelligible. To put it short, it was nigh impossible.

Anna pierced Elsa's ears with a voice so brutally honest that a viking would be turned a coward. "Well, it's not a good look for you."

Elsa felt a tear drop drop from her eye. Audibly crying, though trying to hide it, she whispered "I- I know." She dared a glance up just in time to see her sister roll her eyes.

"Whatever." Then Anna walked away. Elsa watched her shorts sway instinctively, and the feeling of desire that burrowed into her core made her feel even more useless.

Elsa was left there, alone and vulnerable in the inimical hallway. She no longer really had to use the restroom, but did feel a little like throwing up. When she regained her legs, she scuttled back to her room with her tail between her legs to lick her wounds. She could only reach one conclusion after everything: Anna wasn't herself. She had changed so drastically, she'd been replaced by someone else, someone mean, someone unforgiving.

But she was still Elsa's sister, No matter what, and Elsa needed her. The platinum blonde cried into a pillow, clutching it as if it'd take away all of the pain inside. She missed _her_ Anna, the loving, caring one. Where did that girl go? Did she vanish with Anna's hope? Had she melted away with the red head's thoughts of Elsa?

Elsa just wanted everything to be back to _normal_.

* * *

As the next week moped by slowly, the weather seemed to read and imitate Elsa's mood. Grey skies, rainy sprinkles. The sun rarely made its bright, happy appearances. It withheld its smiles from the Earth just to keep Elsa's world shrouded in gloom. And it was almost November twenty-fifth. Elsa knew that, she dreaded it. The closer it got to the anniversary of her mother's death, the more she thought about her family, and the more she missed them. The more she _needed_ Anna, her sister, not this new, scary Anna.

Elsa didn't have her father or her sister, but she had a tradition. One with Anna, one she hoped would bring her and Anna back together, because she couldn't imagine how difficult it'd be to make it through that day without Anna's support.

So, the morning of the twenty-fifth rolled around, and Elsa balled her eyes out on the aching memory of her mother. The terrifying recollection of the crash, the moment that changed her life for the worse. She mourned over loss and loathed over the incident that started it all. Her ears rung and her lungs hurt, her abs burned from her almost colic convulsions, and her heart broke on overdrive.

Normally, Anna would be there, holding her, telling her it was okay, that she was there. She'd be in a warm and loving embrace, safely nestled into the figure of her sister, the most important person in her life.

Not this time, though. She hadn't heard from Anna. Nothing. But Elsa was given an inkling of hope by one single mishap. She was nearly out of tears, and her vocal chords needed a rest, so she was wallowing in relative silence. That's when she heard it: a cry from the next room over. Muffled, but still carrying immense power. It was Anna. Elsa felt a stab in the heart at hearing such a thing, it hurt worse than all of Anna's lies, all of her harsh words and ruthless actions. It brought tears to Elsa's eyes, but also gave her hope, because it meant Anna _cared_ about someone. It meant they had something in common: they both missed their mother.

Elsa wasn't planning on using that to manipulate Anna, she simply wanted to use it to re-establish a connection with her. She hoped to utilize it to move passed everything that had happened between them. She was desperate enough to ignore all the lies, no matter how much they'd eat away at her insides.

So, she stood in front of her door once again, mentally fortifying for her trip to Anna's room. She was going to do it, she was going to reach out to Anna, to offer her a hand in the form of tradition. Every year, they both tried to go to the graveyard to visit their mother's grave. Every year, Elsa failed, but Anna supported her, and they bonded. They worked to build each other up, it wasn't a one way street.

And Elsa hoped to rebuild that road, because maybe then she'd have her sister back. If she couldn't, well then what was the point?

Elsa prepared to go knock on her sister's door.


	12. Essential Confrontation

Elsa stood before her door, irresolute and frightened. The idea that she could tame some of the animosity between her and Anna, find some way to bond, was seductive.

But, the knowledge that she'd actually have to _face_ her sister, in one way or another, was far from desirable. Not to mention, it all brought forth painful memories from the past, surfacing them from the lake of her emotions.

Elsa's heart beat with a constant, aggressive pitter-patter, her breath locked itself within her throat, and her ears were trained as astutely as a cat's, able to pick up sounds as minuscule as a pin dropping. That was the instant she finally willed herself to reach forward, and the seemingly lost in time second shattered as the cold metal of the doorknob froze it and forced her to exhale. The door swung open, and her vision started spinning along with the ground at her feet.

She had to catch herself on the door frame, her brain suffering hypoxia due to her sudden, relentless, panicked hyperventilating. Elsa didn't have the strength to open her eyes, to see what was in front of her, so she kept them shut and her head down. A panic attack was still wrapping its warped tendrils around her body and rattling her stomach, however. So, she plugged her ears as well. She knew _exactly_ where her sister's room was, no need for sight or sound.

 _Am I really doing this? Yes, I have to! But it'd be so much easier to slam your door shut again and hide! And suffer alone? Let Anna suffer alone? I_ have _to do this, I_ need _her!_

That's what got her going, Elsa did need her. Anna was her drug and she was going to get her fix. As she walked blind and deaf through the hall, she could feel the surge of blood pumping through her arteries, hear the rush as it throbbed past her ears, and feel her mouth turn to desert with nervousness and fear.

And she knew, she didn't even have to open her eyes, she _knew_ when she reached her sister's room. A door more imposing, more intimidating, more intertwined with her worst fears than even the front door. She knew because she heard soft sobbing. When she picked up that noise, every doubt and reservation in her mind about what she was doing was usurped by motivation. For just a second, through the agony of knowing her sister was hurting, Elsa had the strength to do what she needed to. And a second was enough time.

She knocked. Quietly, slowly, reserved, but resolute. By the third pound, her courage had made itself scarce and her knees began to wobble. But it was done.

A sniffle came from the other side of the door, followed by silence. Elsa thought Anna might not have heard. The notion brought a powerful mixture of relief and despair to her.

Then, however, she had proof that Anna heard. In a raspy voice, the younger girl almost whispered "Leave me alone, Elsa" through the door.

Before she could stop herself, Elsa started to trip over her tongue. "I- I- Anna."

"E-Elsa..." There was a strange, almost impossible mixture of reservation, delight, and resentment in the quiet, soft voice. There were also too many nuanced emotions to weed out quickly enough to carry conversation, but Elsa did find relief in the simple word. Relief that stemmed from Anna just _knowing_ that her sister was still there.

On top of all of this, hearing Anna saying her named felt like running cold water over a bad burn: refreshing. It was also exciting, though, and intimidating. Elsa was pollyannaish in that moment due to the fact that Anna hadn't outright rejected her, so the fluffy joy that innervated her stomach overtook her other emotions. "C-can you open th-the door?"

Again, the air stood still, not moved by the vibrations of sound. But then, like a rock breaking the surface of a pristine pond, the click of Anna's door unlocking perturbed the gossamer atmosphere. A symmetrical, freckled face speckled with tears appeared before Elsa. Anna was simply in a t-shirt and jeans, and it looked like she hadn't bothered to iron either one, just threw them on. The huge, teal eyes were watery and bloodshot, capturing the older sister's attention and retching her heart. "What do you want, Elsa?"

Elsa stayed quiet and thought for several seconds. "I, um, I miss mom, too." The platinum blonde hugged herself and diverted her gaze. Her voice cracked, and her eyes felt wet.

Anna chewed her lip, not making any motion of advance, just analyzing. Her voice was a little softer than before. "I know you do."

Now fidgeting with her own hands, Elsa reluctantly pressed on with her plan, even while flirting daringly with passing out. "Do uh, do you th-think we could- we could..." She let her voice hang between them, extending her meaning as she made brief eye contact. Every fiber of her being was hoping for a warm response, for Anna to be relieved, happy that Elsa was there, reaching out. She was hoping that Anna would say yes so they could start to patch their relationship.

Anna took the meaning, but didn't give Elsa what she wanted. A little harshly, but also mixed with concern she said "are you serious? You can barely even leave your own room."

Elsa felt like she had just been hit in the gut by a cannon ball. She heaved and swallowed a lump in her throat as a tear ran the length of her cheek. "Please?"

Shaking her head slightly and closing her eyes, the red head inquired "why? What's the point?"

"I just- I need this, I have to try." Anna's lack of motivation was crushing.

Meeting her sister's eyes and a little bit vindictively, Anna quipped. "It's always about you, isn't it?"

Sure, Elsa was annoyed at the insinuation that she didn't care about Anna, but mostly, she was hurt by the heartache poured into the words, how broken Anna sounded. "Anna, you know that's not what I meant."

Silence. But at least Anna was listening, that was a good sign.

"Please," Elsa begged.

Anna sighed, her aggravation audible. "Fine." She didn't look happy about her choice. Her arms were crossed now, her mouth in a sharp line, and her eyes pointed crossly. But she accepted. That alone was enough to make Elsa shudder in relief, enough to touch her heart. Because, even if it was reluctant, Anna's acceptance meant that she still at least _needed_ Elsa, on some level.

Elsa nodded and gulped. "Thank you." Only then did the reality of what she was about to do start to set in. The more she thought about it, the more she wanted to run back to her room, but at this point, that'd be remiss. She had planted the seed of her relationship with Anna and needed to carefully tend to the delicate crop. Her heart was pounding and she already felt dizzy.

Anna walked out of her room, brushing her shoulder against Elsa's as she breezed passed. "Let's go," she said tersely.

It was a few moments until Elsa was ready to turn around. She had to let the shivers of exhilaration at her brief contact with Anna stampede down her back. She shuddered almost in ecstasy, the stress on her heart shifting from fear to desire. When she caught her baited breath, she turned to the hallway. Anna had stopped and was looking back at her.

"Come on," she gestured impatiently.

Keeping her eyes down and trying her best to ignore all sounds, the older sister cautiously began her journey. She wanted to talk to Anna, but she didn't know what to say. She wanted to hold Anna's hand, but was afraid that she'd be rejected. She kept silent, save for her screaming mind, and clutched her hands together in a sort of substitute for her sister's.

Elsa progressed, albeit slowly. It took her several seconds to take each step, as she was simultaneously battling a fierce anxiety attack.

Somehow, she made it to the front door. Elsa didn't have any idea how she did it, but she did. Anna was tapping her foot next to her, and she was once again in a battle of wits with an inanimate object. Elsa was chewing hard on her lip in an attempt to stave off everything within. She was standing there, by the front door, with _Anna_ , about to try to _leave_ the house.

It felt... good. And bad. _Anna_ , Elsa thought, because it felt good, _is here to comfort me._ It was just like before, it felt familiar, and that was what gave Elsa the strength to go down stairs. It's what gave her to strength to be planted where she was, to even consider touching that doorknob. She held up a shaky hand, but panicked and took it back, even retreating a step or two. With a deep breath, Elsa closed her eyes and tried to find relaxation, but it was nowhere, her entire body ached from how tense she was. Her room would be easy to go back to.

 _But I have to try! I have to do it for Anna!_ Just like before, _for Anna._ Elsa was still grudged by the lying, but she was starting to slip passed it. It was rough and tore her apart as she slid by, leaving a bleeding gash in her heart who's pain always felt as fresh as the first day, but she was sliding right back down to Anna.

Because Anna made her happy. And for a moment, Elsa thought she was in the presence of the old Anna, the tender one. But that was a foolish mistake. Anna sighed loudly. "I don't have time for this," she complained as she reached over and swung the door open.

Suddenly Elsa was facing the front yard. She screamed and jumped back, shaking and unable to catch her breath. A surge of anger, a sharp reminder that Anna was cold now, wrung out Elsa's heart. The familiar fight between her two largest emotions at that moment, fear and fury, erupted within. How could Anna _do_ that? She'd never done such a thing before, just _exposing_ Elsa to her worst fears, and so rudely, at that!

Anna looked almost dumbfound at Elsa, who was glaring back. "If we're gonna do this, let's do it."

Gritting her teeth, the platinum blonde said "you kn-know I can't just _do_ that whenever I want." She looked anxiously through the open portal. Big mistake. It was like looking Medusa in the eyes, she became petrified in fear.

"Then I'm wasting my time here."

That stung like nettles. Elsa clamped her heart in pain. "No, be-because I h-have to try!" Elsa's vision was blurring, her eyes misty and hot.

In a harsh, lower voice, almost a whisper, Anna said "what's the point of trying if you know you're not gonna succeed?" Her eyes, Elsa noticed, were beginning to tear up, too.

Elsa's eyes narrowed at her sister's arrogant, blinkered outlook. "B-because m-maybe this time I _will_ succeed!" Her voice was hoarse with tears.

"Well, it's not like you've succeeded in anything _else."_

Elsa froze. She forgot about the door, she forgot about her phobia, she forgot about _everything_ except one thing: betrayal. It was refreshed, birthing a new torturous spawn to sic on her. It was just like when she'd listened in on Anna's conversation with Hans, the first time she was stabbed in the back. To Anna, every moment in Elsa's life since the accident was pointless. But Elsa had to make sure. "Wha-what do you mean?"

The younger woman rolled her eyes in irritation. "Oh, come on, Elsa. You can't leave the house, you can't put on the _goggles_ , you can't leave your room without crying, you can't even be _happy_!"

Through a mind stressed beyond its natural limits ran old and new wishes for a future. Going outside, out on a date with _Anna._ Coming back, cuddling, kissing, _making love_ to Anna _._ Elsa knew that was where she'd find happiness, that's all she'd wanted for years, that was _who_ she was. She tried and failed to find a substitute for Anna in Rapunzel, and she was yet to leave the house, but that was what she needed to do. And to do that, she needed _Anna_. Caring, kind Anna, not Hans's Anna. "I- I'm trying."

"It doesn't look like you are!"

Elsa was vexed. How could it look like she wasn't trying? She _just_ reached out to Anna, all on her own! "What!?" Her face and tone must have conveyed her confusion, along with her terror, because Anna explained.

"Rapunzel," she said, bringing up memories that Elsa would rather leave below. "I _set_ you up with her, _I_ did the work, she was willing to work around your stupid phobia, and you _broke up_ with her! I mean, come on, Elsa, how much clearer can you be? You _want_ to be miserable! Dad was right!"

After letting the bullet from Anna rip through her heart, Elsa protested "I wasn't in _love_ with her!" Her blood was running hot, simmering and well on its way to boiling.

Anna scoffed and crossed her arms. "Well, you _looked_ pretty _damn_ in love with her!" The way she spoke was laced with jealousy.

"But I _wasn't_!"

"Stop _lying_ to me, Elsa!"

The blood in the platinum blonde's brain boiled over and exploded out her ears, turning the room red and steaming. " _I'm_ lying to _you_!? What about all the _lies_ you've told _me_!?" Anna's eyes narrowed, but Elsa didn't give her a chance to rebuttal, she was too caught up in the moment, whipping flames back and forth. "'You're doing great, _Elsa_! You're getting better, _Elsa_!'," she mocked. "You've been lying to me for five years!" Her voice was cracking, shattered with little sobs and forced by anger, but she was standing her ground.

Anna looked like a provoked, venomous, and highly aggressive snake now. "I was trying to _help_ you! How stupid can you be!?"

"How was LYING supposed to HELP!?" Both girls were shrieking like banshees now. The cumulative pressure running through their veins was probably enough to fire a cannon.

"I was PROTECTING you!"

" _Protecting_ me!? How is that supposed to help me get BETTER!?" If Elsa didn't have a sense of where she was, it was hard for her to progress anywhere. She needed a zero point, which Anna had so graciously taken away from her.

Anna clenched her fists so hard that the vein in her forehead bulged. She yelled like she was in pain, followed by screaming "GOD, Elsa, could you _be_ any more OBLIVIOUS!?"

The insult burned up like a piece of wood approaching the sun: fast. It was completely incinerated, precluding any adverse reactions to Elsa. She was blindsided by rage. "Oh, _I'm_ the oblivious one now?"

"What's THAT supposed to mean?" The red head's voice reminded Elsa of an angry bear, but a little more menacing. For the first time in their lives, Anna was about to snap on Elsa, and for the first time, Elsa didn't care. She just wanted to _yell_.

In her most cutting, most forward, and candid voice, Elsa furiously let her thoughts out, _finally._ "Hans has been stringing you along like a puppet, MANIPULATING you! You're not even YOU anymore! I HATE him, I HATE it when you're with him!" Yelling that felt almost as rewarding as Elsa imagined pile-driving Hans with a boulder would be, it felt like her chest was finally free of crushing anxiety and overpowering weight. It let her breathe, rapidly, angrily, venomously.

Anna looked offended _. Good,_ Elsa thought before she could stop herself. That was meant to hurt. "Hans would _never_ do something like that! He has NOTHING to do with this!"

"Oh, but he DOES," Elsa seethed. "He has EVERYTHING to do with this! He took you _away_ from me!"

"I never _belonged_ to you! I was never yours to TAKE!" Anna looked like she was just on the cusp of tipping over on the shaking, violent tightrope she was walking. She was _almost_ pushed passed her limit, hinted by her snarl; her angry, shrill, biting words; and aggressive stance.

"But I _needed_ you! And you LEFT me for HIM!" Elsa's throat was aching now, she gestured to herself as she screamed. Her eyes were certainly red with tears, the lump in her throat audible in her voice. She was telling the truth, and it hurt like a bitch. The memories of back when her and Anna were close, the painful analysis of how they started drifting apart, best friends and sisters needlessly alienating each other.

But that didn't cool off the boiling blood within Elsa. That didn't stave her fury, it didn't make her want to forfeit this argument. If anything, somewhat unexpectedly, it made Elsa want to get some _distance_ from her sister. Maybe it was because she had to process everything alone, or maybe it was because she didn't know if she could forgive Anna for lying. Either way, she was yanked from her thoughts by Anna's yelling.

"Why can't you just GROW UP!? I'm tired of this! I'm tired of having to BABY you! I'm tired of all your crying for no REASON! I should be ABLE to have a life! If you can't handle that, it's on YOU, not ME! I'm done! I'm done feeling sorry for you, I'm done with your overplayed _phobia,_ I'm done with YOU, you selfish BABY!"

Anna had been pushed too far and the whiplash of her words was stunning to say the least. Not the words themselves, they wouldn't have bit so hard on their own. But the _truth_ in her eyes, the hateful honesty written all over her face. She wasn't just in the heat of the moment, she was serious, at least about wanting to be done. Though the words were probably supposed to just hurt, Elsa knew that there was some part of Anna that _was_ tired of it all. That was the worst part. _What if I can't come back from this?_

Frozen in her little moment of time and realization, the older sister couldn't help herself. She gave up, she started to bawl her eyes out. Not for attention, not to win, just because she _honestly_ had to. _Honesty_ was a bitch.

She couldn't see, she was too busy wiping her eyes and burying her face in her hands, but Elsa could hear. She heard almost a whisper, a voice that carried remorse. "Oh, Elsa, I- I'm so sorry." Anna tried to gently hug her elder, but Elsa yanked away viciously.

"Don't touch me!"

Anna's eyebrows hung loosely over glistening, aquamarine eyes, her mouth hung slightly agape, taken aback at the reaction. "Elsa, you know I didn't mean that. It's me," she assured.

With all of her willpower, the platinum blonde looked up and made eye contact. She couldn't even hold her head still because she was shaking so much with her crying. "No," she shook her head, "you're not Anna. Anna would never hurt me. I _love Anna_." At that, Elsa tightly hugged herself and turned to leave, legs barely holding her weight.

"Elsa," the voice was accompanied by a hand grabbing the platinum blonde's shoulder from behind.

Elsa yanked herself away. "Leave me alone," she softly but harshly said back, catching a glimpse of her sister's face as she shifted again. It was completely lost, stunned, trying to process the whole situation. Evidently, Anna became self-aware, privy to just how much damage she had been doing to her sister.

Elsa walked away.

It was actually more like stumbling and crying, but she _tried_ to walk away. As she did so, she ignored Anna's pleas, or rather didn't hear them over her own wailing. Elsa locked herself in her room, away into safety, and dug into the very last spot she felt secure: in her bed. Sure, there she wasn't affected by her phobia, but she was scared of something else: Anna leaving.

It gave some piece of mind to hear knocks, to hear the red head's sad and regretful voice saying "Elsa, please, open up," through the door. The muffled, melodic voice fended off one of the black holes in her. "Elsa," came another whine, and another. They carried on for several minutes, and the platinum blonde wanted to open the door, but she couldn't bring herself to. Not yet. She had to know. She had to figure out what Anna wanted more: to stay with her to to be done with her. She was approaching an answer, skeptically handling it, scouring every detail with her mind for defects, and almost ready to accept it. Anna was still there a little while later, and Elsa was slowly convincing herself that Anna wanted to _stay._

But then it happened. Anna's voice was now spiteful but coterminously sad. "Fine," she said with an audible lump in her throat, "you win." And she left.

Now, Elsa had her answer. Anna wanted to, and did, leave. She just _hoped_ that her sister would come back. She couldn't really be done forever, could she?

* * *

By late that night, Elsa was worried sick. Anna was still gone. All the platinum blonde could do was sit and contemplate, mull broodingly over the recent events. _Why_ it actually felt good to rile up Anna, _why_ Anna actually left. Elsa tried to figure out what precisely went wrong.

That wasn't easy passed the frequent panic attacks. They'd come forcibly whenever she thought about her sister, which was pretty much all the time. So, the night was a whole lot of trying to breathe, desperately attempting not to pass out, and clutching her chest, which felt tight with anxiety and like it was filled with lead. She had no more tears, she was too dehydrated to make any more, but the closest source of water was in the bathroom, down that hall. Elsa couldn't do it, she couldn't even make herself get out of her bed. There was no point, she had lost Anna, by the time the sun came back up, she was sure of it.

So, Elsa looked around her room, eyes painfully crimson and suffocating on her own despair. She _lived_ for Anna. She couldn't do anything without her sister, that much had been proven. And now Anna was gone. Elsa was sure that she didn't care if she dried up and died of dehydration, at least that way she wouldn't have to miss Anna. She wouldn't have to live with the immense, boulder-like weight of knowing that she _can't_ get better hanging over her head. She was in the shadow of her two nightmares and had no energy left to run.

 _I could speed it up, dehydration is slow._ The girl's eyes went wide and her heart stopped. She wasn't expecting _that_ thought, of all possibilities. But it was there, voicing itself and nowhere else in her mind bothered to challenge it.

Elsa searched everywhere she could without getting off of her safety zone, but found nothing. Nothing that could help her follow through with her urge. The last place she was looking was on her bedside table, where a lamp and her phone sat, waiting, untouched. The frustration of once again failing set in and quickly overwhelmed Elsa, making her shake and squeal with a breakneck heartbeat. She took her phone and threw it at the wall in hopes of dissipating her rage. It crashed, denting the drywall with a loud thud and shattering the screen.

It wasn't the best idea, but Elsa sat there, panting angrily, only to find that it worked. She didn't feel _better_ , just less furious. _If Anna was here she'd be able to tell me it's all okay, to make_ everything _I'm feeling just go away! But she's not here, and it's because of me..._ Elsa resigned herself to the will of another panic attack.

By late morning, Anna was still gone, but at least Elsa had time in between crippling bouts of disquiet to figure out where she went wrong. _I was too needy. I needed Anna all day every day, I didn't give her any space!_ As far as Elsa knew, that's why her sister wanted to start dating Hans, because she needed some space, some of her own life, not just Elsa's. Anna had _told_ her that when she started dating Hans, but Elsa didn't listen then. She was too caught up in herself, she was too selfish. _I started it all, I drove Anna away. It's my fault._

* * *

Elsa was starting to be overpowered by worry. The sun set, and her little sister was still nowhere to be seen. She knew that Anna was probably with Hans, but that didn't calm her down, that made her even more concerned. She didn't want Anna to do anything stupid or rash, or worse, Hans to take advantage of her. She had broken her phone, though, which meant the only way to contact the police or Anna would be a land line. A land line that sat in the trepidation of downstairs.

And she was about to try. Her unease rattled her stomach like heavy, bouncing rocks and was slowly beginning to overpower her fear. It felt like she was being physically torn between two worlds, one side of her being sucked into a black hole and the other being pulled out. The ultimate terror of losing her Anna outweighed her phobia eventually, however, and she stood from her bed, almost falling over because of how weak she was.

That's when she heard it: a car door. Out front. Elsa's eyes almost popped out of her skull, she didn't care to wait and see if it was her father. She physically couldn't just sit and wait, listening for who it was when the desideratum of seeing Anna, of knowing she's safe and _home,_ was too much. It gave the platinum blonde the strength to start the rush out of her door, and when her phobia pummeled her onto the ground, she continued by crawling down the first half of the staircase.

She was stopped dead in her tracks, However, when she noticed that Anna was talking to someone. The natural, wonderful voice that Elsa was so accustomed to may have been tighter than normal, more stressed and anxious, a little raised, but it was there and it sprouted a seedling which burgeoned into a mighty vine of affection circumscribing her heart and making the organ ache. She listened. "Well, it's a big deal to _me_."

"All right, all right," came Hans's answer. The pit of Elsa's stomach deepened and her blood tithed with discontented anger at just hearing him.

Anna sounded like she was on the verge of tears. "I just, I'm nervous about talking to her, and I don't really even know why. I mean, she's my sister, we've always been so close." There was a slight hesitation. "W-well, we _were_ close."

Elsa's heart was shattering more and more with every word that she heard. The fragmented remnants were even breaking, razor sharp. She silently started crying and stepped a little farther forward, just enough to peek around the corner and see Anna, who though focused on Hans, was facing Elsa's general direction. Just laying her eyes on her sister after such a stressful night mitigated Elsa's anxiety.

Spying from a safe distance behind Hans's back, the platinum blonde watched as he took something out of his pocket and offered it over to Anna. "I know, and that's why you've got to have a little of this."

Skeptically, Anna eyed something that Elsa couldn't quite see. She had an educated guess about it though, some sort of drug. By the look on Anna's face, it was probably illicit. Elsa tried to breathe, but she couldn't, her lungs and throat were tensing and strangling her heart. She didn't like the idea of Anna doing drugs, especially if they came from _Hans_.

Looking back to her boyfriend, the younger sister, still unaware of her elder's presence, said "I, I don't know," as she shook her head.

Hans pushed the item in question forward. "Come on, it'll calm you down. Just trust me."

Elsa was ready to bonk him in the back of the head with a baseball bat, preferably a metal one. She was fighting to speak up, trying to get air in her lungs, but her feelings used them to oppose her efforts. She felt glued to the stairs. She gagged a little instead of talking and tried to yank herself free, accidentally moving farther out of cover.

Anna glanced back down and slowly took the bag and opened it up. She was going to do it, Hans was winning, he was _controlling_ her. Before she took anything, out of reflex, she scanned the room. Elsa froze, her hair standing on end, skin becoming even more pale. She dared not move a muscle, lest she shift the delicate balance of the situation and make it fall. Teal eyes locked on a petrified figure, a flash of surprise sparking within them. But there was also recognition. She was taking note that Elsa had left the room, and so many thoughts were passing by those eyes in the foreign language of the mind that it made the older sister's head spin. Anna gulped and Elsa swore it was the single clearest, loudest noise she'd ever heard. It was like listening to a deafeningly loud, single drop of rain slamming onto the ground in an otherwise serene environment. Odd how such silence could be so roaring.

Eyes dancing between her two targets, the red head anxiously and quickly shoved the item in question back into the hands of a very confused Hans, who still hadn't looked behind himself. "Wh-"

"Actually, um, I think you should go," Anna interrupted as she opened the font door back up.

Elsa flinched and slunk farther away, as if the minuscule distance would save her from the outside. She wanted to run completely, but _had_ to watch this unfold, something deep within her made her stay.

Hans, baffled, stammered "but- wait, why?"

Anna looked slightly agitated at him and started ushering him out the door. "Just go, please." Elsa would be lying if she said she didn't revel in that man's slightly hopeless look. The tables had turned, Anna was in control for just that moment. For just a short time, he _wasn't_ playing God. He was insignificant, and it made him look like a toddler that didn't get the toy he wanted.

"Anna, I really don't think-"

"Look, Hans, I just need some time to myself, okay?"

Hans tried to talk smooth. "I just want to be there for you." Elsa grimaced.

Anna's talked a little quicker now, looking annoyed. "And I appreciate that, but this isn't something you can fix."

"Well, the only way to find out is to try, right?"

"No, because this is between me and Elsa, not you." She was narrowing her eyes as she explained, positioning herself such that Hans was between her and the door.

"I bet I can, with a little bit of-"

Snarling at where her boyfriend was going, Anna asserted with some aggression "don't bring that up again, just give me some space!"

"But-"

"Now," she bit, shutting the door and locking him out. Elsa almost cheered, until she remembered the immense tension between her and her sister. Then, she just kind of turned white as they made eye contact, Anna resting her back up against the door and breathing out a deep sigh.

The younger girl started walking forward as carefully as a cat, making Elsa flinch. Anna's eyes, however, weren't angry, resentful, or anything like that. They were soft once again, her lips pursed, her eyebrows brought forward in thought. She was holding back tears. Elsa wanted to hug her, but instead, she instinctively took a step back as Anna arrived at the bottom of the stairs, several feet away.

They looked at each other, Anna's eyes darting around, trying desperately to look at Elsa but to not make eye contact. Elsa did the same, fighting to talk, but a cat, also known as Anna, had her tongue.

After a few moments of thinking, the younger sister finally said "Elsa, we- we need to talk." Her voice was rough with internal strife, ridged by the onset of tears.

Elsa gulped and nodded. She was there, with Anna, and Anna was reaching out. She had won, she _hadn't_ driven her sister away. All she had to do was make the right call. All she needed was to not give in to her fears and run once again. She stood, weight shifting back and forth, preparing to dart, but brain telling her to stay put. Finally, gulping and nearly fainting, Elsa breathed "quite a bit."


	13. Sisters

The girls made their way to Elsa's room. They didn't have to, they were alone in the house, but it was Anna's idea. That meant that she was cognizant of Elsa's struggle and making sure to accommodate it, it meant the world to Elsa. Anna was looking out for her, even if it wasn't outright stated.

The walk there was still awkward and silent, though. Elsa didn't know if she should talk on the way or hold hands or something. There was an odd, uncomfortable feeling between them that reminded Elsa of the Uncanny Valley, but a different kind of discomfort. A ravine dug between two people who were once best friends. It wasn't like two people like that could just go right back to the way they were before, they had to go through a process similar to getting to know one another all over again, but that was extra awkward feeling because they _already_ knew each other.

Elsa decided that entering her own room with the knowledge of what was about to happen felt like having a cool flash of relaxation followed by a severe hot flash of nervousness. Her heart was loud and clear, she was already beginning to get hostile chills, and her throat was tight.

Anna shut the door behind them, Elsa hardly noticed. They sat down on Elsa's bed, as if their increase in physical comfort would also ease their minds. The sisters were perched a few feet apart, neither wanting to shatter the impressively sized bubbles of personal space they both had formed over the last weeks.

Elsa forgot how to talk.

Luckily, her sister did not. She took a deep breath and let out a long sigh, running her hands through her bangs and subsequently trying to tuck hair behind her ear. Elsa always liked that quirk. "I um," the younger woman began in a very low voice, "I don't really know where to begin."

Elsa didn't either, so she kept mute. Her throat was already starting to ache from holding tears. She hugged herself to dispel her unease.

"I guess," Anna said sincerely as she made apologetic eye contact with her elder. "I guess I'll start by saying I'm sorry."

A bizarre vocal production escaped Elsa, something akin to what a crying mouse might sound like. "I'm sorry, too," she sniffled and whispered. Her sister's apology was like a band-aid finally placed over the heavy wounds she had attained: a great comfort to have but functionally inept for the job being performed. If it was a small cut, that'd be fine, but it wasn't. If the apology was like a band-aide, maybe the talk would be like time, healing everything.

That's not to say it didn't feel good, because it did. It felt glorious, relieving, exciting, and head-spinning. Anna was back, helping to mend their relationship, they were going to be sisters again, and Elsa had high hopes that they'd be just as close as before. Her heart was upbeat and fast and her eyes were damp when she made eye contact with her younger sister.

 _God_ , Elsa missed staring in to them. And here she was, doing just that, right now. It rejuvenated her, being able to openly look into aquamarine orbs for several extended seconds. It created a spasm that was halfway between a sob and a laugh. "I- I missed you, Anna."

For the first time in a long time, Anna smiled genuinely at her older sister. She displayed affection, caring, _love_ as she tenderly whispered "I missed you, too." She placed her hand uncertainly on Elsa's, ever so gently making contact and bridging the gap between the two. The touch sent warm tingles up the platinum blonde's entire arm, giving her goosebumps congruously over her shoulder and back. It was a clear swirl of happiness in her turbid life.

"Look, Elsa," the younger continued. Elsa held her breath. "I know now that I hurt you a lot, I just wish I saw it sooner." Anna gently squeezed Elsa's hand to emphasize her point.

Elsa was pretty sure she was actually melting. That apology felt like a swish of refreshing air over a burn. It stymied the pain momentarily, but didn't finish the job of healing. She was still a little scared, but felt more safe now that she was with her sister, the _real_ one. "It-it's okay," she sniffled, "you didn't mean it."

Anna smiled in a way that Elsa could only describe as lovingly. It gave her butterflies.

"Plus," the platinum blonde said, voice shaking in apprehension, nervous about how her Anna would take what she was about to say, "Hans had a lot of control over you."

Anna looked slightly uncomfortable at this comment, taking her hand from Elsa's in order to fiddle with her own. Elsa was terrified that she had said something wrong and it was going to cause her sister to close off and become distant again. She waited with baited breath in suspense. Finally, Anna lightly said "I've been thinking about what you said, that Hans is manipulating me." She hugged herself and looked down self-consciously.

Elsa just listened, completely ambivalent about where this conversation was about to go, but seeing her sister so vulnerable looking broke her heart.

"What um, what made you think that?" Anna looked nervous as she asked the question, eyebrows hung loosely over her eyes and teeth acting on her lower lip. The anxiety in her voice was almost palpable.

Elsa took a deep breath. Where to even begin? She supposed she'd start with the most obvious. She told Anna what happened the night of their double date, when Hans cornered her in the kitchen.

While listening, Anna looked like a swirling mixture of heartbreak, caring, anger, and attempted atonement. She once more clutched her sister's hand. "Oh, Elsa, I- I had no idea, I..."

"It's okay," the older woman said in a deep sigh. "You didn't know." She looked off to the side.

Anna's eyes widened suddenly, and Elsa didn't have to wonder what her epiphany was, because she immediately started working through it out loud. "That means- that means that that night, where you yelled at Hans and I thought you didn't have a reason, that night you _did_ have a reason, and I got mad at _you,_ Elsa, I'm so sorry! He- he was _taunting_ you right in front of me!"

The younger sister was working her own blood pressure up in a self feeding cycle. The more she realized, she angrier she got. Except this time it wasn't at Elsa, this time it was all for Hans. She continued. "That- that- _agh!_ I can't believe he tricked me like that, I can't believe he _hurt_ you like that! And all this time I thought you irrationally hated him! That- that _dirtbag_! No, you know what? Dirtbag is too good for him, I don't even know _what_ to call him!"

It was Elsa's turn to reach out. Literally. Her heart struck like nearby thunder as she extended her free hand to reign in her sister's flailing ones. "It's okay, it's okay, Anna," she insisted, her voice hitching on every other syllable with sobs. When she did this, Anna calmed down and refocused, looking apologetically at her elder and they found themselves just _staring_ into each other's eyes for what felt like a long time. Elsa noticed how soggy and water-logged Anna's eyes looked and it made her own prickle with insipid tears.

They both seemed to draw the same conclusion about what to do next, because Anna just broke down and lunged into her sister at the same time that Elsa did. They hugged tightly, their hearts beat so close together that they felt connected. Elsa was able to once again feel the electricity traverse her spine at the feeling her Anna's bosom on hers and the huge area of contact between the two. Endorphins gave Elsa a rush as they goaded all of the negativity away.

"I should have never left you," Anna whined. "I should have never _hurt_ you, I shouldn't have let _him_ hurt you." Nails were digging into her back, but Elsa didn't mind. She wasn't bothered by the wet spot appearing on her shoulder, either, because they meant that she was getting her Anna back. Even while being a sniveling mess, she was able to enjoy the familiar, flowery scent of her sister's hair.

Elsa utilized a trick she learned from Anna using it on her for years: she rubbed her thumbs in little circles across the younger girl's back, gently forcing order upon her. It seemed to work a little bit. "It- it's not your fault," the platinum blonde shamefully admitted, "it's m-mine."

Anna pulled back, leaving her hands on either one of Elsa's shoulders and giving her a stern look. "No, Elsa, I'm the one who starting dating him, I let it go on behind my back-"

"B-but _I'm_ the one wh-who was too needy," the elder interrupted, a lump in her throat impeding her voice.

"No, Elsa, that's not why-"

"Yes it is!" Elsa launched right in to explaining her reasoning. "I needed you all day every day, I took up _all_ of your free time, and th-that's why you started dating Hans, isn't it? B-because you needed space?"

"Elsa, you can't think like that, that's just tracing a butterfly effect, I'm-"

"And you said! You said you want to be done!" The platinum blonde's voice was hoarse with tears and the acute pain and subsequent ache from the argument came back in a rush, but she didn't shy away from her sister. She was _confiding_ in her once again.

"Elsa," Anna just whispered with such care that it was like she was putting the finishing touch on a giant house of cards. She gently cupped the platinum blonde's pale, wet cheek as she said her name. "I- I didn't mean that, I was- I was just mad, and I'm sorry for saying that."

Diverting her gaze from teal, Elsa gently and mournfully said "r-really?"

There was a length of time where no sounds came from either girl and the air became like stretched elastic between them. Elsa didn't have to look up, she could feel the gears turning as her younger sister thought about what to say next. "Maybe it was Hans getting in my head," she suggested, implying strongly that she fully agreed with Elsa about Hans. "But I was saying those things to hurt you, and- and I wish I didn't."

"E-even when you were in your room talking to Hans?" The words came out a little offensive, but were still largely in the defensive position.

Anna looked dumbstruck. Her eyes stared in shock while her mouth hung open silently. After a few seconds, she regained some motor control. "I- wuh- what? When?"

"The n-night we t-tried to confront d-dad," Elsa sounded like she was half crying, half talking. "I overheard y-you talking to Hans in your r-room." When her sister remained mute, the elder explained exactly what she overheard, about how she found out Anna was lying.

A couple seconds went by and a freckled face filled with recollection and understanding. Anna was having an epiphany, a moment where she _finally_ understood why Elsa had become distant, what _really_ catalyzed their mutual drift and wreaked havoc on their lives like a bull in a china shop. She deflated, eyes watering. "Oh, no, Elsa, you- you didn't hear everything."

Elsa's ears perked up. She had mixed feelings about the way that this could go, but she just sat there, inviting the answer to come.

"The last thing that I said was 'maybe you're right, but I'm not giving up, and neither is she.'"

Now, Elsa looked back up. And when she saw the candid eyes and the soft, apologetic smile on Anna's face, she could tell that there wasn't a single lie being told. She had been _wrong_. Anna wasn't giving up, Anna didn't mean what she said last night about wanting to be done, she was putting on one _Hell_ of a convincing show. Elsa had to take a moment to let the wonderful and powerful set of emotions inundate her body. "S-so you're still not tired of taking care of me? Of dealing with my- my- agoraphobia." Saying that word was harder than eating a huge, hairy spider, and it felt just like one traversing Elsa's throat. But she said it, because that was the first step to owning it.

Anna stroked Elsa's bangs gently, sending a delightful shiver all over the older girl's body. She closed her eyes to focus more on the ecstasy and leaned in to the touch. "How could I be? You're my blondie."

Elsa felt an overpowering urge to cry collide with an unstoppable need to laugh inside of her and it made her feel like a wet noodle for just a second, then settled like a buzz in her stomach and around her heart.

"I still wouldn't trade you, exactly how you are, for the world, Elsa."

Every single muscle in the older sister's face was at odds with its complement as she held back tears. She leaned in and once more clung to Anna, burying her face in the crook of a familiar, comforting neck. "And I wouldn't trade you for anything."

Anna's voice considerably lifted the mood surrounding the atmosphere. There wasn't too much tension from alienation between them at this point, but however much was left was annihilated by her witty comment. "Not even for a new dress?" Elsa could _hear_ her sister's smirk, no need to leave the embrace. _I've missed her so much_ , she thought as a small chortle escaped.

"Who needs a new dress when I have you?" She meant for the reply to come across as playful, but it instead sounded impressively serious. Anna didn't seem to mind, though, as she hummed and tightened the hug. Elsa's heart was on overdrive, finally able to take a reprieve from stress only to be swamped by love.

"I don't know, I hear there are some _really_ nice ones on sale," Anna joked.

Despite herself, Elsa smiled and laughed at the comment, giving her younger sister a good-natured slap on the back. "Don't push your luck." They both sat up, enabling eye contact, Elsa still grinning like a fool. Looking rapidly between her hands, which were restless, and Anna, the platinum blonde quietly reiterated "I've missed you so m-much," her eyes becoming misty.

"I've missed you, too," Anna said sweetly. "I missed being able to talk to you about _anything_."

They just smiled for a few moments. Anna then seemed to snap out of something and subconsciously closed off her body language somewhat, as if she wasn't confident or willing to control something. She tucked some hair behind her ear. Elsa panicked, afraid she'd done something wrong, scared that something had been ruined between them _again._ The room started spinning, but Anna's hesitant voice stopped it.

"Hey, um, I know I wasn't there and I'm sorry, but- well, I just wanted to make sure- I mean, I've asked you before but we were kinda sorta not talking when I did and I just wanna be really sure that um, that, you know, since you broke up with Rapunzel and all, that you're really okay."

Given more normal circumstances, Elsa would have giggled at her sister's little, awkward rant. But these were far from average times and she couldn't help but feel a little discomfort as memories of her and Rapunzel surfaced. She wondered how her friend was doing. After all, they hadn't really talked. _Maybe I should call and see... after I get a new phone. Or should I give her more time?_ Elsa still felt bad for what she did, and that brought her down a little. Anna definitely noticed the minute change in her sister's behavior, but she let the subject pass tacitly, probably using it to guess what Elsa's answer would be.

But Elsa had to think, really think about Anna's question. Was she sad at the loss of Rapunzel? Yes, she was, but it felt like she was upset about the prospect of losing a friend. She was also lonely, oh so lonely, and that was one of the worst parts of the passed few weeks. But she had Anna back now, so she didn't feel as isolated, she didn't ache as much.

So, was Elsa okay? "Yes, now that I have you back," she decided, cheeks flushing slightly. She shyly looked up to find a small grin on perfect, pink lips and a hint of scarlet on matching cheeks. The sight made Elsa's heart flutter.

"I'm glad you're okay," the red head offered, appearing to believe her sister's words.

Elsa couldn't hold it back anymore, she had been pining to say something out loud ever since Anna started drifting away from her, but it kept getting caught in the proverbial filter between her mind and her mouth. "I love you so much," she whispered. It felt _amazing._ It elicited a release of dopamine so powerful that it made her entire body shudder and her heart skip a beat.

But that was nothing in comparison to the warmth and joy that ravished her when Anna fell into a tight hug once more and said "I love you too, Elsa," leaving her breath to trickle down her older sister's ear and seduce her back.

Elsa sighed in joy. She had her Anna back.

* * *

The next day, when Anna returned from class, the girls got right to their homework. It felt good, being able to at least sort of focus on her powerpoints and example problems. But, Elsa still wasn't fully focused. How would she be? Anna was right next to her on the couch, their shoulders brushing against each other. She'd steal glances like precious gems, blushing whenever Anna would catch her. Anna didn't seem to mind, though, she was smiling, too. Oh, and the pig tails were back.

Yes, the couch. Elsa wasn't completely back to being comfortable downstairs, but she was trying. Having her sister back and life returning closer to normal helped magnitudes. She still would have minor flashes of panic, during which she'd have to close her eyes and pretend she was in her room. Anna noticed the first time it happened.

"Elsa, are you okay? What's wrong?" The voice sounded a little far away as the older girl focused on not having a panic attack.

"I- I'm just not used to leaving my r-room," she said in a shaky voice, unwilling to expurgate her thoughts after what happened last time she lied.

There was an arm wrapped around her shoulders now. It placated the trying thuds of her heart and took ascendancy against her upcoming attack. "Do you want to move upstairs?"

"No," Elsa said, because she wanted to step outside of her comfort zone. Facing the smallest encampments of her fears first was the only way to start making progress, to at least getting back to where she used to be.

"Are you sure?" Anna was craning and leaning in to make eye contact with Elsa now. The platinum blonde drank in the sight, hoarding resolve as she did.

"I w-want to get better."

Anna's mouth curved so smoothly that Elsa almost missed it. Her eyes seemed to pile up with something as she took a moment to collect her thoughts. "I'm really proud of you, Els." And that's all that Elsa needed. That was the only thing she required to be satisfied with her decision, to have the willpower to actually follow through with it. And Anna making an effort to show how truthful she was being helped, too. "I mean it."

A couple of hours after that, with dinner time approaching, the younger sister got Elsa's attention and gave her a straight, serious look. She wore a nice, dark green dress and had put effort into her makeup. She didn't, however, cover her freckles. "Elsa," she said, unconfident in her words and making the platinum blonde apprehensive.

"Y-yes," she asked, looking up from her work.

Anna interlaced both of their hands. That helped Elsa focus on the situation at hand instead of on her imaginative worst case scenarios. "I have dinner plans with Hans tonight-"

"B-but I thought- I-" Here came that panic attack from earlier, and fast. Elsa's mind was spinning like a rampaging merry-go-round.

"Shh, shh, Elsa, Elsa, it's okay," Anna interrupted, taking a squatting position in front of her sister.

"Please don't go." To herself, Elsa's voice sounded like a sad kitten.

"I can't just ignore him."

Almost too eagerly, the elder insisted "y-yes you can! What if he does something?"

Anna looked appreciatively at Elsa. "Don't worry, I just need to talk to him, I won't let him play any mind games on me. I just want him to pay for what he did to you. To _us._ "

Elsa knew she couldn't win this, even if she didn't think her sister was completely right. She had to trust Anna. "Okay," she relented. "B-but be careful."

A gentle squeeze of the hands was the first response that the elder got. It felt like Anna was wringing the worries out of Elsa like one wrings out a wet towel. "I will."

Elsa just nodded. Her heart squirmed in her chest and her stomach pitted itself. She wanted Anna to stay. _But I have to learn- I have to give her the space she needs, and she needs to do this._ Elsa could tell that much. Anna was too hard-headed to leave something half done or give up halfway through. That's one of the many things that Elsa loved about her.

"I'll be back before you know it, okay?"

Again, the platinum blonde answered mutely. She saw Anna off, standing way back when the door was opened and anxiously waving her goodbye. Yes, Elsa was discontented that Anna left and was with _Hans_ , but her mental strain was eased because she knew she had Anna back; she knew she could trust her.

* * *

Elsa tried to stay downstairs for the entire time Anna was gone, but over the course of a few hours, her intransigent fear started to get to her. She wanted to stay and fight it, but it slowly became a losing battle, and she had to fall back to her room, where she knew she was safe. She worked through as many more powerpoint slides as she could, doing her darnedest to focus, but eventually her mind became weary and so did her body. It was getting a little into evening and she hadn't really slept the night before, so she started feeling the weighty affects of drowsiness rapidly.

She _really_ hoped that Anna was okay, and she wished that she was back home. She thought she might as well prepare herself for bed. Even though it was difficult, she went out and brushed her teeth, then changed and went back to her lessons.

Unfortunately, she had to hunker down for a little while longer before she finally heard the front door open back up. She jumped out of her bed in excitement. It had to be Anna, it wasn't late enough for their father to be home. She cracked open her door just enough to fit her head out, and sure enough came the voice she wanted to hear. "Elsa?"

The platinum blonde's heart leapt. "I'm- I'm up stairs!"

Shortly, Anna was in front of her sister. When she got there, she smiled and gave her a hug. "Hey, Elsa. Ooh, you're all ready for bed?" Anna didn't sound upset, just surprised.

Elsa hugged her back. "I didn't sleep well last night," she admitted, half hoping that Anna wouldn't figure out that it was because of her. She didn't want her younger sister to feel bad. After all, she knew she'd sleep well tonight.

Anna winced, causing Elsa to also flinch, because it meant she knew why Elsa didn't sleep. "Yeah- uh, sorry about that- I should've called or-"

"No, it's okay." Elsa wished to not let the mood get lost in the dark. She felt a furious heat permeate her cheeks as she admitted "I um, I broke my phone, anyway."

"You what- huh- how? Actually, you know what? I don't even want to know," Anna was baffled but still teasing.

"I was a little angry," Elsa offered shyly.

Anna bit her lip in thought and then rubbed Elsa's shoulder. "We'll get you a new one tomorrow." She smiled without judgment. "Oh, and a new dress," she teased.

Elsa blushed but was relieved that she wasn't receiving any flak for her reckless action. Anna apparently knew pretty wellhow sensitive the topic was, so she was being careful not to poke too much fun at her sister for it. The elder appreciated that. "Thank you," she blushed. "So, um, how did your talk go?" Her stomach felt like it was being eaten from the inside out by rats.

The red head gulped and tucked an ethereal strand of hair behind her left ear. Fidgeting in place she said "I-I broke up with Hans."

Elsa didn't know whether to make sure that Anna wasn't broken up about it or cheer as loud as she could. There was a parade pounding through her body, and upbeat, loud, excited fanfare playing to the march of her heartbeat.

She opted to focus on Anna. "I- are you okay?"

Pink lips twitched in several different directions sequentially, as if their owner couldn't decide which emotion to exhibit. "Y-yeah," came the answer after a few seconds. "Let's um, let's just get you to bed, okay?" She placed a gentle hand on Elsa's back and guided her to the bed. The touch felt like a soft, electric current buzzing into the elder's body. She loved it.

"How-how'd he react? Did he hurt you?" Elsa asked a little bit anxiously. Given how much of a slime ball she felt Hans was, she was worried about possible repercussions from Anna's actions.

"No, he- he tried to play it cool and charm me in to changing my mind, but-" Anna looked at her sister, boring her eyes truthfully into Elsa's, "-but after what you told me, nothing will change my mind."

Elsa's heart swelled ferociously, but her sister's behavior was still a little tense. Now at her bed, Elsa looked over at Anna. She felt a spike of love so powerful that she was barely able to contain the urge it created to hug her sister and smother her with kisses. "Are you sure you're okay?" The party within her had died down rather quickly when she noticed Anna's inarticulate but clearly not okay look.

"Mm-hm, I'm fine."

Elsa wanted to push the subject, but she refrained from doing so. Maybe Anna just needed a little time alone to process the whole thing. _Don't be too needy, give her some space, or else you'll screw everything up again._ Conflicted, the pale woman postponed climbing into her bed to give her sister a hug. The embrace was returned readily with a soft shudder from Anna that made Elsa's heart skip like a broken record. "I'm here for you if you need me."

Anna sniffled. "Thank you," she whispered.

When they were done, Elsa got comfy and Anna leaned over the edge of the bed. The older girl's heart pounded progressively louder as her sister got nearer. Was this happening? It'd been so long that Elsa's mouth went dry at the prospect. It was, Anna was puckering her lips.

Elsa closed her eyes as warmth pushed gently against her forehead, almost moaning at the soft, obscenely intimate feeling contact. Swirling around her entire body were stirring desires and delights alike. It felt so much more than sisterly.

To Elsa's dismay, Anna pulled back, leaving a cool spot where her lips once were. "Goodnight, Elsa. I love you."

"I- I love you, too," she whispered. Anna grinned warmly at this and turned to leave, Elsa catching her walking away in her form fitting jeans. "Too much," she whispered because she _had_ to, but she didn't want Anna to hear. Heat pooled naturally between Elsa's legs as she watched, only to see Anna glance back tenderly as she passed through the door. When it shut, Elsa rolled over.

Yep, everything was right back to normal for Elsa, down to pining for Anna to walk back through that door and stay with her all night. But that was just a hope, a wild dream.

* * *

Elsa was starting to drift off. Although she was still concerned about Anna and how she was certainly _not_ okay, her mind was, relatively speaking, peaceful. She could tell that that night would be the most restful one she'd had in a while.

And that's one of the reasons why as she began to fall asleep, she had a serene smile on her face.

That is, until a knock shocked her like a nine volt to the tongue. Her eyes ripped open and heart pounded at the startling noise as she turned rapidly to face her door. "Elsa?" came her sister's voice.

Elsa had to clear her throat to speak. "Yes, Anna?"

"Can I come in?"

"o-of course." Her heart skipped like a flat stone on a pond.

Anna did just that, Elsa sat herself up against the headboard. Teal eyes were trained on their hands, who were nervously fiddling with each other. Anna sat on the side of the bed such that she was close to Elsa and she could turn her body to face her. "Earlier, I- well, I don't want to keep anything from you."

Being jittery but also ecstatic was starting to become banal to Elsa. She sat there expectantly, silently asking for Anna to elaborate. She did.

"I really am sorry for leading you on about, well, you know, your progress. I thought I was helping but- but I wasn't and I should have just told you the truth." Copper hair, which was undone from it's twin braids, hung shamefully.

Elsa had to hug Anna. She had _already_ forgiven her for that. _I suppose I didn't make that clear enough._ She leaned forward into an embrace that was soft and warm-hearted, as inviting as she could make it _without_ accidentally crossing the line from sisterly territory. Anna returned it and buried her face into the crook of Elsa's neck. It tickled. "It's okay, Anna, I know you were just protecting me."

Anna let her weight loose so they both fell onto the pillows, now lying down on the bed. Elsa was hyper conscious of her sister's night gown and thought she might pass out. She desperately needed to fan herself off, but there was no opportunity for that. The younger girl mumbled "I'll tell you the truth from now on, okay?" She still sounded upset with herself.

To lighten the weight on Anna's shoulders, Elsa pulled her head back to make sure that she was seen grinning. "Only if you promise to _also_ keep being the best sister ever."

This seemed to work, Anna chortled. "I promise, Blondie."

Elsa giggled. "Is that a thing now? 'Blondie?'"

Winking, the younger girl poked fun. "I think it's a cute nickname for you."

Blushing wildly and also smiling like a crowned fool, 'Blondie' decided it was time for a counter-attack. "Whatever you say, Freckles."

After a split second of faking a taken-aback reaction, Anna laughed and confided "I like that one."

Elsa smirked. "Me too."

They found themselves laying on their sides, faces inches apart and facing each other. Anna's eyes looked so big from this close, so full of _everything_ that Elsa wanted, so pure, and so troubled, even if her lips were curved upwards. And in an instant, Anna was crying.

Eyes widening at the sudden display, Elsa once again pulled her sister close. She was confused, just seconds ago, she seemed to be so happy. "Anna, what's wrong?"

 _Wow_ those nails really dug into Elsa's shoulder. "I just- after I broke up with Hans, I needed some time to think, so I went and s-sat in the p-park, that's why I was gone for so l-long."

Anna sounded like she was going to continue, so Elsa simply rubbed her back and whispered "it's okay."

"And I- I realized something." She pulled back to look her elder in the eyes, her own turning red and puffy, oozing tears. Anna sniffled and wiped her button nose.

Elsa furrowed her brow. "What'd you realize?" She was selfishly frightened that it was something about _her_ , but no matter what, she was going to let Anna get this off her chest. Elsa just hoped it wasn't going to damage them.

"Hans," Anna said, to the platinum blonde's relief, "the way he was behaving- for our whole relationship- was really a-abusive, and- and everything he did to me- to you- m-makes sense now. It's s-sick, but it make sense."

Elsa was almost speechless, sporting a lump in her throat. "H-how?" She gulped.

"H-he was putting you down behind m-my back, he was making it seem, to m-me, like you w-were giving up and th-then I think- I think," Anna sniffled and sobbed in the middle of her thought, trying to collect herself. Elsa helped her along by comforting her. "I think he was purposefully alienating us and- and wanted c-complete control over m-me."

"Anna-"

"I mean, he tried to make me _reliant_ on _him_! He made me change the way I act, the way I look, everything that makes me, _me_!" She whispered remorsefully. "H-he was trying to take away the part of my life that really matters." She then made eye contact with her sister, conveying her meaning. " _You_."

The older girl's heart swelled, surging burning tears into her eyes and thudding against her ribcage. _I'm what matters to Anna_ , she thought, letting the feeling wriggle around in her stomach and blossom like a vivid flower. _And Anna's what matters to me._ She couldn't speak through the cotton ball lodged in her esophagus, so she just pressed herself against her sister so tight that they may have partially fused.

And Anna did the same.

Elsa took a tremulous breath. "I love you, Anna."

That was apparently exactly what the other girl needed to hear, because she hummed and adjusted into a more comfortable position, markedly relaxing into their now tangled mess of limbs. "I love you, too."

Elsa didn't want to move, ever. So she didn't. She felt the inviting pull of arousal form between her knees at the full body contact with Anna. Their soft night gowns didn't provide very much separation, and that made her heart pound and entire body feel numb with desire. But the best part was the reciprocal love that Anna displayed, even if it was only sisterly, it was still love. It made Elsa feel wanted, it made her feel safe, and it made staying put, right where she was, so close to Anna, the only thing she wanted at that moment. A little while later, she finally dozed off, and they fell asleep in each other's warmth.


	14. Sleepover

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the second of two chapters I've uploaded today. In case you missed chapter 13, go back and give it a read! :D
> 
> I won't be able to post another chapter for a couple days, sorry!

Tranquil. That's how Elsa described the next morning to herself. The groggy, half asleep lull that clouded her body as she came to the wonderful but precipitous realization of what's going on. The arm draped over her shoulder and feet playing with her toes, the soft, rhythmic puffs of breath flushing up against her cheeks, the _warmth_.

Elsa grinned her face in two and stretched, a small yawn escaping her mouth as she did so. She woke up next to _Anna._ She shifted and faced her younger sister, smiling like an aesthete examining fine art. Well, Anna _was_ quite a beauty, such perfectly crafted cheeks, the little, sweet button nose covered in freckles. Her lips were so soft looking, Elsa suddenly felt like she _needed_ to caress them, raising her heart.

Anna's face was so peaceful, so relaxed- _oh, who am I kidding?_ The freckled face was laying on it's right side, the respective cheek being squished by the pillow and her mouth hanging ajar with a small wet spot of what was definitely drool right by where she was sleeping. Her hair wasn't even close to tame.

But there was still the peaceful rise and fall of her chest, which Elsa paid a little too much attention to, and the soft sound of her sleepy breaths. These were, of course, interrupted by little snorts every now and then, but Elsa didn't mind, she thought it was cute.

And the hair! It glowed, it seemed to light _itself_ up as the morning sun grazed just bits and pieces of it. _I could get used to this,_ Elsa decided as she settled back down and steadfastly continued her examination of her sister. Now that there was some light, she could tell that Anna's nightgown was pear green, splayed loosely over her body until it disappeared beneath the covers alongside the lower half of her torso.

Elsa readily lost track of time. That is, until her sister let out a great big yawn and stretched her arms high above her head, smacking her lips in content as she lazily opened her eyes. Elsa blushed and quickly looked away.

"Mm, good morning, Blondie." Anna smiled as she spoke.

Every time Elsa's heart beat it felt like it'd give her a concussion. "Morning, Freckles, how'd you sleep?"

"Excellent," came the happy reply, along with the brush of a hand finding its way to the platinum blonde's upper arm. Her eyes widened momentarily as her mouth went dry, the epicenter of contact burning like a thousand suns. "How about you?"

Elsa looked at her sister. She felt like she was dreaming, and in dreams you can say anything. "The best I've slept in a long time." She didn't even realize it as the words slipped out, but the subsequent panic they caused was short-lived due to a little, tiny, adorable giggle.

"We should have sleepovers more often, then." Freckled cheeks were brushed with red, which meant Elsa must have looked crimson.

Even though her heart and lungs had quit their jobs and were now just stagnant at their posts, she managed to squeeze out "sounds wonderful." It _was_ a dream, it _had_ to be one, or else it was a dream come true. Elsa had to replay what she'd heard several times before she believed that she heard right. _Anna wants to sleep in here more!_ She discretely pinched her own thigh. _Yup, I'm awake._

Anna sighed, still grinning, and rested her head on her hand, as if to get a better look at her older sister. She looked so... _happy_ , was the only word that came to mind. Then again, so was Elsa, she had everything she wanted right in front of her, so she couldn't help but to do almost the exact same thing as Anna, sharing a deep eye contact without even realizing what she was doing.

"You know," the freckled beauty laying before Elsa said.

"Hmm?"

"There's no such thing as too much." Anna managed to look smugly content with herself yet entirely sincere at the same time.

Elsa furrowed her brow, heart being startled back into work and trying to compensate for lost time. "Huh?"

"Last night," Anna said cheerily, trailing her nails lightly on porcelain arms and finally finding Elsa's fingers to fiddle with, letting her attention drift between blue eyes and slender fingers. It sent shivers _all_ over Elsa's body, she couldn't help but listen, it was like she was entranced. "You said you love me too much-"

Elsa's heart stopped, something it seemed to do annoyingly often, and her eyes bulged to the size of golf balls. She fought for breath. She _didn't_ want Anna to hear that! _What if she found out about my- my feelings!_ She curled her toes as tightly as she could to diffuse any visible signs of tenseness from her body.

"-and there's no such thing."

Caught in a funny place between intense delight and overwhelming embarrassment, Elsa let her face approach the temperature of the sun. _She wasn't supposed to hear that!_ Oh but how strongly Elsa wished that Anna meant it in the same _way_ as her. Then again, Anna didn't seem to mind. Now that Elsa looked, her sister was bright red, too, but smiling at her. So, she tried to calm down, but the rush she got from the entire situation made her do the opposite. "How about some breakfast?" She blurted very suddenly, very quickly. Bad idea.

Anna smirked. She knew _exactly_ how to embarrass her sister for at _least_ the rest of the day. Elsa filled with dread, but there was also an odd, electric buzz of excitement. She supposed getting teased by Anna was quite a riveting ordeal. "Pancakes?"

Elsa nodded faster than a woodpecker jabs a tree, mostly to end the conversation and move on, but also because pancakes really did sound good right about then.

Looking like a queen celebrating a victorious battle, the younger girl proudly said "sounds delightful, _Blondie_."

They both rose from the bed and Anna bounced over to the door and peered back at her elder expectantly. They made silent eye contact that seemed to thicken the air in the room for Elsa as she waited for her sister to leave so she could change. After a few moments, it was clear that Anna was wondering why in the world Elsa wasn't following her and beginning to think that it might be the phobia holding her back.

Okay, well, her phobia did still make Elsa a little reluctant to leave, but she could get through that with Anna. "Ehem, Anna, I- I need to..."

Furrowing her brow, the freckled girl asked "you need too... what?"

"Change."

Teal eyes widened. "Oh right, yeah, I'll go um- I'll go change, too." Elsa giggled a little, it helped to dispel the slight awkwardness clouding her. That is, until her sister's next line. Anna was leaving, but turned back as she walked through the door and spouted "I'll be right back, don't miss me _too much_ ," with a wink.

Elsa cheeks actually _hurt_ from how red hot they became as she looked at her own, bare toes, and then her door clicked shut. Anna was gone. "Phew," she sighed, because she had a few moments to collect herself. Her heart did a little dance, she could tell Anna was just messing around, and it was electrifying.

Shortly, Anna was back at Elsa's door in a nice pink blouse and jeans, looking casual yet pretty. Elsa wore a simple blue dress that knew Anna had expressed a liking to in the past. They both went down to the kitchen. The elder had to take a moment to gather her wits, but they all scrambled into position on their own when a warm hand interlaced its digits with her own. Together, Elsa had no problem making it downstairs.

Nor did she have any trouble once she got in the groove within the kitchen. She mixed up some pancake batter from scratch and began to let them sizzle on a skillet. Throughout her endeavor, the blue eyed woman would steal glances at her sister, who was _always_ looking back admiringly with a nice little smile on her face. Her freckled cheeks were squished up against her palms as she lazily rested her head. Elsa couldn't help but let her face become a little red while she cooked.

In no time, breakfast was ready to be served. Elsa plated their food while asking "syrup?"

She met big, teal, and mischievous eyes. Anna said "yes please," then she bit her lower lip subconsciously, "I'd like a little _too much_."

Elsa boiled and giggled in her spot, unfortunately not able to fan herself, as she was holding two plates. Breakfast was back to normal.

* * *

Elsa and Anna were on the couch after the red head got back from class that afternoon. The older of the two was sitting down, surfing the web for a new phone while Anna did her level best to make such a task _impossible._ She was laying on her side, her head in her sister's lap and facing the screen, making Elsa have to rest her left arm on Anna's body and take a very praying mantis-like pose when she wanted to type anything.

And of course, Anna was animatedly talking about different phones, advertisements she saw, and _anything_ that crossed her mind, her hair tickling and her head bouncing around a little bit. Elsa was nearly drawing blood from her own lip as she focused on trying to work down her arousal. Her lady parts, however, were becoming agitated in the best possible way as her desire was providing such pressure and proximity. It was like an electromagnetic pull on Elsa's core that she had to constantly fight against.

"What about that one?" The question goaded Elsa into looking at the screen and reading the details.

"N-no, that one's screen is way too big," she decided out loud.

Anna stroked her chin and said "hmm," in reaction. Excitedly, she pointed out another. "This one's pretty much the same, but smaller."

Elsa looked. It was different from her old phone. _But change isn't_ always _bad, is it?_ After a moment of internal wrestling, she decided that it would do perfectly well. "Good eye," she complimented as she added the item to the cart. She next picked out a blue case with snowflake patterns made out of little jewels and made her purchase.

Anna spun on her elder's lap, grinning like a madwoman. "Now, let's find you a new dress."

Obviously, this was readily accepted by the platinum blonde, so she excitedly went to a website for one of her favorite retailers and began to browse all of her options. She spent several minutes scanning the screen, lips curved upwards, and admiring the beauty of the expertly crafted garments. Some of them were simple and practical, some were miles over the top.

"This one's pretty," the platinum blonde said, clicking on a fairly straight-forward teal dress. No sleeves, a knee length skirt, and an unobtrusive color made it perfect for daily use, as she'd probably be using it for. "It matches your eyes," she added almost accidentally. The words just kind of slipped out.

Anna hummed. "While that _does_ sound perfect," she playfully bragged, "but there was one that complimented _your_ beautiful eyes."

Elsa smirked. "That one sounds even better," as she clicked back to the array of dresses.

After chuckling, Freckles pointed out the item she was talking about. It had a dark blue, foot-length skirt, but the sleeveless body was lighter blue, trimmed regally with the same, powerful blue that the skirt was made of. It _did_ look _really_ nice, and Elsa was tempted to buy it right then.

But then she noticed something. "What about this one?" She clicked on a similar dress to the blue one, but it was rich green and light green respectively, rather than the shades of blue. It was... it was so... _Anna._ And because of that, Elsa desired it even more.

"Elsa," the word was accompanied by a slap to the wrist and a pretend scolding. "That's _my_ color!"

Without even thinking, she spewed "well then I guess that means I'm yours whenever I'm wearing it." When she realized what she'd said, Elsa's heart stopped, cold and dead. Her breath baited itself, and her _entire_ body blazed like a wildfire. She was _sure_ that she let too much slip out. She gave her sister a nervous smile to rectify her mistake.

Anna turned to face her, eyebrows brought together and mouth in a straight, serious line, still resting her head in her elder's lap, still putting pressure on Elsa's core. Elsa prepared herself for the worst, for Anna being disgusted, telling her to stay away, or even _leaving._

"Be careful what you wish for," came the mocking tenor, "because I demand royal treatment from my _all_ personal maids."

 _Wait, what?_ It took several seconds for the older of the two to catch up, to properly process that Anna _liked_ what she said and responded positively. She looked down at her sister to find a smile interrupted by a chewed lip and a wink that felt like then thousand volts to the heart. Her insides nearly exploded, gushing and melting and wiggling everywhere in disarray, an errant mass of enchanted love. "I- you- I uhh..."

Anna raised an eyebrow and right then, all Elsa could think about was how _hot_ that was.

"I'm definitely g-getting this one, th-then," she dared to say as she added the green dress to her cart.

Donning something between a victorious, an evil, and an enthused grin, Anna piped up "great!"

Elsa purchased the green dress.

* * *

That evening, the girls were preparing for bed as per usual. Anna had gone to change and brush her teeth while Elsa did the same. A few minutes later, there was a knock on her door. Elsa smiled excitedly and swung open the portal to find _exactly_ what she expected: Anna in a soft green night gown that was about mid-thigh length, grinning at her. She invited herself in, Elsa shut the door. Elsa pried her eyes away from the exposed flesh and tried to redirect the growth of her imagination from the places underneath her sister's nightie. But imagination grows like a wild vine, where it wants, when it wants, and she began to feel hot.

The elder of the two strolled over to her bed, expecting to get in and Anna to simply say goodnight. _And, if I'm lucky, maybe she'll give me a goodnight kiss like last night_. Elsa's heart skipped a beat as she recalled the experience, and her lower body pooled with a warm, tingly sensation when she thought about how Anna slept _in the same bed_ as her last night. Elsa's knees wobbled, almost dropping her. She needed some time alone soon to take care of the ache between her legs.

She climbed in to bed and looked up a little expectantly at her sister. Anna was nibbling on her lip and restless where she stood, which caused Elsa rapid concern, but before she could ask, she was listening. Anna tucked some loose strands of copper behind her ear as she spoke. "I was wondering if um, if you w-want me t-to sleep in here again tonight." She made eye contact with Elsa, her face glowing bright red.

The room became very hot and a little spinny to Elsa. She wanted to answer, she wanted to _scream_ yes! But her tongue was caught in a taffy machine. "I..."

"It's just that, you know, I uh, I felt... good sleeping with you- er, not _with_ you with you b-but, you know, n-next to you- together" both girls' faces were _super_ red. If Anna was blushing that hard, Elsa didn't even _want_ to know how ripe the tomato she resembled was. "- and I just thought m-maybe I could tonight- again, tonight." Anna was bouncing in place while Elsa reigned in her tongue like a wild horse.

Elsa's eyes rolled in the ecstasy of a mental orgasm as she tried not to sizzle in her spot. She was thrilled, to put it lightly. She _loved_ sleeping near Anna, and now she had the chance to do it _again._ She wouldn't miss this opportunity to embarrassment, surprise, or nervousness, all of which were grabbing at her tongue. Anna's question was too auspicious and her behavior was too cute. "I- of course!" The words came out desperately eager sounding to Elsa, but at least it was an answer.

Aquamarine eyes lit up to teal as Anna's cheeks were wrinkled by a wide smile. "Great! Elsa, it'll be so nice!"

The sound of Elsa's heart was a constant buzz as this point. She scooted over to make room for Anna. "Yeah, it will be." _God_ she could barely _breathe._

Anna nestled herself within the blankets, scooting close to her sister and settling for laying on her side and holding Elsa's hand for a little while.

Elsa was just trying not to drown in the liquified air. She wanted to put her arms around Anna, desired to fall asleep in her arms again, but was too timid to make such a move. They had done it last night, so what was the problem? _What if Anna rejects it this time, what if she finds it too intimate or it's too un-sisterly?_ She spent so much time worrying about what she could and couldn't do that Anna took matters into her own hands.

Gentle, warm, silky smooth arms found their way around Elsa's body as Anna scooted in and nuzzled her head cozily upon her elder sister's upper chest. Every muscle in Elsa's body, including several that she didn't know existed, became stiff as stone. Blood rushed to her every extremity as she heard a soft hum of delight and felt Anna's leg, which was mostly _bare_ rest on top of her own.

 _Wow_ she was hot, Elsa was starting to feel hot flashes blitz down her body, flaring wildly in her core, _especially_ as Anna shook a little bit to adjust her weight. Elsa was biting her lip too hard, she could feel herself growing needy, feel the dampness between her legs.

She almost jumped out of her skin when Anna spoke. "Goodnight, Blondie."

Elsa looked over, untying the tangled mess of her tongue to respond. "N-night, Freckles." And as she accidentally got lost in deep eyes, she added "I love you."

This earned a grin of Anna, who then leaned in and pressed impossibly warm lips to Elsa's cheek. It set a fire ablaze, spreading to a conflagration all over the elder's face and chest. She silently shuddered as she drank in the brand new, wonderful experience of Anna kissing her cheek, rather than her forehead.

It was that much closer to her lips.

Anna pulled away with a little smack and red cheeks. "I love you, too, too much," she winked playfully and subsequently nuzzling her head into her sister.

Elsa blushed and giggled at the comment. Tonight was a good night.

On Wednesday, Elsa felt unprepared. After all, she hadn't used the goggles the previous week, and the last couple times she used them she barely even managed to get them on. But she had to try today. _My Anna's back. I can do this,_ she lied as they approached the virtual reality device. Her heart clenched like an iron fist in her chest.

Anna's hand on her waist weakened the oppressive grip on Elsa. "You can do this, I believe in you."

Elsa steadied herself. "Thank you." They were downstairs, just arriving at the couch, where the goggles waited patiently to torture her. They were like a slumbering beast, a forgotten nightmare still lingering in the dusty, webbed depths of one's mind, waiting patiently its time to return to relevance.

There was a soft pat on her back as Anna went to prepare the simulation. Simultaneously, Elsa gazed at the juxtaposition in front of her: the forlorn goggles resting almost peacefully on the warm, familiar, and inviting couch. It was like a hot front and cold front meeting, and she was going to have to wade in the storm. She let out a long sigh that shook from head to tail.

To Elsa's dismay, Anna didn't take forever to prepare. "Okay, it's ready, just-"

"A-Anna, I don't know if I can do th-this," the elder said while cocooning herself within her own arms.

"You can," came a startlingly stern reply. Anna took Elsa's hands in her own and made strong eye contact. The simple sureness emitted from the younger girl made Elsa's statement seem a little farther from the truth.

Elsa nodded and gripped her goggles with a deep breath. She felt her sister's hand gently on her back, acting like a guide who'd stay calm no matter what happened. With this last push, she slid into a textured world of fake buildings and simplistic land.

And her breath picked up, she immediately felt like she was sucking water or fighting a persistent, pernicious malady. Soothing waves of treatment came from Anna's voice, insisting "it's okay, I'm right here, I've got you." With each one, Elsa felt a stronger for a brief moment, resistant to her inimical disease.

The platinum blonde's breaths became so labored as she gradually walked that she could barely hear Anna's seemingly far away calls of "come on, just a little more!" Elsa was starting to see stars and feel light headed.

But she _was_ doing it. She had put the goggles on, she was wading through the empty city, slowly, with no background noises, no fake people, just her, a sidewalk, and some buildings. Elsa had taken back some ground from her phobia, and this gave her the confidence she needed to march onward.

That is, until the warning came. "Okay, I'm going to add cars, don't worry Elsa, you're doing great."

Elsa froze in place, too scared to move, heart pumping too fast for her to breathe. She was going to _try_ to talk. A hand grabbed hers, the initial jump fading as she realized it was _Anna_. The contact radiated support like a space heater comforts during Winter. "Are you ready?"

Elsa gulped and nodded. "Y-yeah."

"Okay, three, two, one, now."

Swishing, dashing, tires on asphalt, the purr of engines, and _ringing_ in her ears were all sounds that Elsa immediately experienced. She kept her eyes on the concrete below her, hoping that she could overcome the sounds, take control of the reminders of her accident five years prior. She curled up, choking on nothing but everything, panic trembling through her body and ravaging her until she was about to pass out.

The cars were insurmountable.

But then the sounds stopped, the sidewalk was pulled from beneath her. She could hear how loudly she was sniffling and crying, she could feel her hands on her face, not her headset.

And Anna was holding her tight, sheltering her from what she had just done. It was over. "It's okay, Elsa, we're done, you're safe."

Quite quickly, she platinum blonde's panic attack was viciously battled and defeated. She wiped her eyes of tears, sniffled, and looked up to see her sister's lovely eyes concerned and proud. Through a still sore throat, she asked "h-how'd I d-do?"

Anna smiled and patted her sister's back. "You did much better than last time. I'm really proud of you, Elsa," she said, lionizing a small but important victory.

Elsa couldn't help but grin in warmth.

* * *

"Hey, Anna?" Elsa prompted as they were winding down on the couch later that afternoon. They weren't really doing anything in particular. Either one would glance at their computer screen every now and then to do a couple seconds of studying or homework, but Anna spent a vast majority of her time content to lean back over her sister's lap and twirl platinum, lush strands of hair between her fingers while humming cheerily.

Elsa, for the most part, was more than happy to close her eyes and let her mind and body idle as the ticklish, intimate sensation of Anna's actions trickled down her body like cold water, causing every hair on her being to stand at attention. Her mind was meandering as she nearly dozed off several times. It brushed against her memories of Rapunzel more than a few times, which began to really cramp her repose style. When the nibbling in her stomach became too demanding, she had to pipe up.

"What's up, Blondie?" Anna didn't move her head from Elsa's thigh, nor did she relinquish the hair.

Elsa briefly giggled and grinned. Though it helped, it's effect was short lived. She figuratively and partially literally folded up. She was a little embarrassed to ask this. "I um- I've been thinking about, uh, about..."

Anna raised an eyebrow. _She does that more than me now, I think, even though she does it to poke fun at_ me _!_ The irony of the situation was, in all likelihood, lost to the freckled beauty, which made it worth a chuckle to Elsa. "Thinking about... new dresses?" Anna finished for her, using Elsa's own French braid to tickle her as she teased her.

Another laugh under the breath. Elsa felt much more at ease now, but her reservations were still prominent, because she had to wonder how her sister would react to her question. After all, Anna was _very_ jealous around Rapunzel. "No, I um, about Rapunzel."

It almost looked like Anna grimaced a little at the statement. Like it was a poorly cooked meal that she knew she had to force down to be polite. That made Elsa want to retreat, but she opted to stand her ground. Clearly trying to look more positive, Anna asked "what about Rapunzel?" It, however, came out slightly bitter, and the downward notch at the corner of her mouth, the slight twitch of her eyebrows creasing her forehead, notified Elsa of how her sister felt.

Elsa had some explaining to do. "It's just," she started, grabbing her braid with both hands, causing Anna to release said hair. "It's just all three of us have been friends f-for so long and we wanted- we wanted to keep our friendship."

The more Anna appeared to consider this, the more relaxed she seemed to be. She raised an eyebrow. "It sounds like you two have it figured out already."

"N-not quite," Elsa admitted. "I don't know how long I should give Rapunzel before I, you know, talk to her again."

Anna maintained steadfast eye contact as she chewed her lower lip almost aggressively. Her eyebrows moved as if they were the scales she was using to weigh her different options. Her voice was a little wavering, a sign of anxiety. "I guess that depends..." she trailed off.

"Depends on..." Elsa practically begged.

Now, teal eyes snapped the steady line of contact they had with their baby blue counterparts. Anna's hands folded to her own body and intertwined with themselves restlessly. "Did she ever say, um, that she- that she's i-in love with you?"

Elsa froze like water in the arctic. Her mind took a respite and left her hanging in limbo for a while as she just stared blankly, processing. After a couple seconds, her eyes blinked rapidly, as if the strobe affect they created would wake her up from her daze. It worked, apparently, because her brain got inundated with thoughts like _what do I tell her!? I have to tell her the truth, she deserves it! But will it hurt her?_ Why _would it hurt her?_ "I..."

They looked at each other silently. _God,_ Elsa could _taste_ the tension.

"Yes, she did," the platinum blonde whispered, looking away and hugging her braid.

Anna's gulp was _audible,_ like an exaggerated sound effect from a cartoon, like Goofy, but painful sounding. There was silence between the two for so long that Elsa had time to mount and begin to win a battle against her trepidation, coming out triumphant only to find a mountain blocking her way.

Pursing her lips and _finally_ saying something, Anna just breathed "did- did you say it back to her?"

Elsa knew that her sister simply needed such information to make an informed decision. She knew that it _wasn't_ the impossible, that Anna _wasn't_ asking because of some more than platonic connection, but she couldn't stop herself from hoping. Plus, even if she didn't _need_ the information, maybe she just wanted to ask her older _sister_ about these things, to keep the water between them clear and calm. All Elsa could do was shake her head, her tongue was trapped.

It looked like some omnipotent being breathed life back into the younger girl's eyes and body. Elsa hadn't even realized how much color Anna was missing, until it came rushing back. Her voice sounded brighter. "M-maybe you should wait a little while longer, then. So she can, you know, move on."

Elsa pursed her own lips now. She supposed Anna was right. Plus, she was glad that some of the tension between unwound. Anna was still visibly jealous, though. "Y-yeah, I think you're right."

"But um- but I can talk to her at school if you want. To just- to see when she's ready." Anna's jealousy was manifesting a little differently now, when compared to when Elsa was dating Rapunzel. The red head's hands were drifting to their older sister, and she rolled farther into Elsa's lap, keeping her like a territorial guard dog. Now, she was pulling Elsa in, not pushing her away. She was overcompensating. And Elsa had to admit, she didn't mind one bit, especially when a lovable, roaming had began gently scratching her back. She purred and arched her back like a cat.

"Y-yes, th-thank you."

Anna simply sang "mm-hm" and kept doing what she was doing.

As seconds dripped by like water from a faucet, Elsa's eyes listed lazily closed as they rolled back in ecstasy. Her hands stroked softly upon her sister's hair. She smiled quiescently, letting the soothingly thrilling interaction infect her body like a virus, slowly making her catatonic. A happy sigh slithered out of her lips.

Things were finally going back to normal.


	15. A Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: brief sexual content ;)

"You know," Elsa said as she finished up her first slice of pizza, "you might just be the best cook I've ever met."

Anna giggled, covering her mouth with her hand to avoid flossing her partially chewed meal. Her face was a little red and she squirmed a little, which Elsa found endearing. They were on the couch in their now standard position, with the elder sitting up and her beloved sister splayed across the cushions, using her sister's thigh as a pillow.

Elsa was getting anything but calm in this position. No matter how many times they sat like that, she was about as cool as the inside of a steam engine. Which is exactly what the room began to feel like as Anna wiggled on her leg.

Anna finished chewing, continuing to ignore a movie they put in a little while ago, and in a hyperbolic tone said "I think I make a better arsonist than cook!" She swung her arms to emphasize her point, which, Elsa was unable to help but notice, pulled up her shirt to just above her belly button. A detail that the so called 'arsonist' didn't fix. Elsa was giggling until she noticed.

Not that Elsa was complaining, because she _wasn't._ She was enjoying every millisecond that she was able to glue her eyes to her sister's pale, smooth abdomen. It was like looking into a bright light that she couldn't bring herself to turn away from, unfearing of the threat of blindness from such a sight as her mouth went dry and her heart felt like it was dying. She felt a magical whirl of heat fizzle in her own core and sink impatiently. She wanted to kiss Anna's stomach. Realizing that she had literally been staring at her sister's belly button for a few seconds and that a response was still needed, Elsa blinked and tried to re frame her mind. "I- I'm sure that chicken would agree with you," she managed to quip.

With a suppressed shriek of laughter, Anna bit her lip and playfully slapped Elsa on the arm as she countered "watch it, or next time I'll make you eat that chicken."

Elsa leaned in for another slice, inadvertently brushing her breasts against her sister. The contact scared the life out of her and cooked her like a lobster in a pot, even giving her that nice, pure red color. She almost choked and frantically tried to bring herself back upright.

Anna squeaked with what sounded like it might have been a giggle, but Elsa was too busy to be sure. In her haste to remove her boobs from her sister's face, she managed to hurdle a wad of pizza sauce into the air. Her eyes widened as she tried and failed to catch the red glob.

It landed on Anna's exposed stomach.

Elsa looked at it, then to her sister's cherry red face, a fantasy of leaning in and licking it off flickering into her mind like a strobe light. She felt a hot flash and tremor in her heart and had to forcibly keep herself entrenched in reality, like a ship anchoring in a storm. "whoops, s-sorry," she said, grabbing for a napkin. She was about to dab it off, but was frozen by another burning image. One of caressing Anna's stomach, watching prickling goosebumps spread over her sister's skin. Elsa's heart was pounding.

"Well," Freckles said, still in a teasing voice. "You can't just _leave_ it there."

"R-right, y-yeah, sorry." Elsa reached down with the napkin, face and core burning as she continued to use her imagination.

Anna markedly tensed as her sister wiped down her stomach, and Elsa was honed in on how _close_ she was to rubbing Anna's nether region. _All I'd have to do is unbutton her shorts..._ Elsa felt a flare ignite between her knees, she sucked air. All that was left was a tiny bit of sauce by the seam of Anna's shorts. Elsa couldn't help herself, she tried for discretion as she wiped her pinky across satin smooth skin. It sent a tingle from her fingers all the way down her back, giving her goose skin and hardening her nipples.

She just hoped Anna didn't notice anything.

Elsa dared a look at teal eyes. Her sibling's face was red. There was a moment of silence so tense that it threatened to shatter Elsa's secret box of sensual desires and spill her sexual tension all over, turning the air husky and heavy, like Elsa's breaths had become moments before.

Thankfully, Anna was apparently unaware of the platinum blonde's antics. She coyly said "thank you, _my maid,_ " with a devilish grin.

The comment managed to wiggle a chuckle out of Elsa, breaking any threatening tension circumscribing her. She lightly slapped Annas wrist. "You watch yourself now."

Raising an eyebrow, the younger girl called Elsa out. "Oh yeah? What are you gonna do?"

Grinning wryly, Elsa leaned her pizza over Anna's stomach as a threat.

Anna called her bluff. "If you drop that, you'd better eat it," she warned. Her face was flushed and Elsa could have sworn there was some sort of undertone in the sentence. One that made her heart flutter, or sputter like a dying engine. She almost choked.

And she thought about it. She _thought_ about actually letting her slice roll off of her finger and crash into Anna's perfectly formed stomach, but the heat that the idea of _eating_ the slice afterwards brought her inches from fainting. In defeat, she dropped her hands.

Anna donned a smug smile. "Pizza was a good idea."

Elsa smiled into red cheeks. "Yes it was, Freckles."

With a contented hum, the younger sibling rolled and adjusted her body so that her shoulders were flush against Elsa's stomach and her head was still using the same thigh as a pillow. Elsa, of course, was thrilled by such a large area of contact to a point that watching the movie was difficult. She very demurely rested one hand on Anna's side while the other began giving her a scalp massage. When Anna purred like a cuddly cat, Elsa's heart rate quickened and she reveled in it. On top of this, Elsa was hyper-aware of the brief moments when Anna's shoulder would brush or press against her boob while the younger girl adjusted. It was just a light touch and it drove Elsa _wild_ , she felt almost feral as her carnal desires shocked her and pooled like lava between her knees.

She was going to _have_ to do something about that _soon._ But for now, she'd enjoy Anna's company and the gentle massages they were providing for one another.

But she didn't have much time to do that, either. The door swung open and Elsa froze like ice. Anna seemed just as startled as Elsa, as she jumped and fixed herself into a seated position with the speed of a cat and agility of a hippo. Amongst her bouncing around, she righted her bangs, looking like she was caught red handed doing something she knew was wrong. Elsa pined for the contact back, she felt the cold draft in the absence of her sister's warm body. She hugged herself for warmth.

"H-hi dad," Anna said. It looked like she was trying to play it cool.

"Hi, girls," came the lower voice. Elsa remained silent, scarcely even looking at her father. She wanted to crawl away into a hole and hide, she wanted to _fight_ the panic rising like the inexorable tide of the ocean inside of her, but all she could do was shake.

Then, in an odd moment of engagement, her dad asked "Anna, what happened to that Andy guy?"

Anna's demeanor hastily formed to defensive and she forced Elsa's hand into her own. That felt good. Almost offended, she said "I'm not with _Hans_ anymore. Why do you suddenly care?"

"I'm still your father."

Teal eyes were narrowed like the blade of a sword. "Since when are _you_ a _father_ to us? You haven't shown _any_ interest in our lives in years!"

Elsa, for her part, didn't really know how to react. Yes, it was odd that their father was asking about them, but it showed that he had some interest, right? Maybe he was trying to reach out a little bit? Or perhaps he was just pretending. Maybe he didn't care, maybe he just wanted to fill the silence. The last possibility that crossed Elsa's mind was a combination of both. He might have been trying to reconnect with _Anna_ , but not her. After all, he did ask _Anna_ a question, without really acknowledging Elsa's presence. _To be fair, I didn't acknowledge him, either._ In any case, Elsa thought that her sister might have been a little fast to jump the gun into confrontation there. But she supposed that's what years of drift will do to people. _I'm just glad me and her stopped ourselves from drifting apart..._

"I'm just gonna go to bed," came the man's voice.

"Yeah," Anna agreed caustically, "I think that'd be best."

They watched like hawks as their father turned and lumbered to his room, shutting the door behind himself. Once he did, Anna leaned in to Elsa's shoulder such that the side of her head was against her elder's deltoids and lightly clutched her upper arm. Elsa's heart fluttered.

She started rubbing Elsa's arm, making her shiver. "I'm sorry, I know that must have stressed you out."

Elsa thought for a moment. "It did, but- but not as much as it used to." After all, this was the first time that she didn't have to close her eyes for at least some portion of their argument.

Anna squeezed her sister's arm and the corner of her mouth swept upwards into silent approval. "I think you're doing a little better."

Elsa froze. Was that a lie? Like Anna had done before? "Do you really think so?" There was desperation knitted with skepticism in Elsa's voice.

The way Anna spoke was so direct, so serious, and so adoring that it eradicated any doubt of its truthfulness like fire vanquishes gasoline. "You just proved you're doing better."

Elsa smiled like a fool. She felt... proud of herself. For the first time in a very long time, she was proud of what she'd done. She was forced to wrap her arm around Anna, allowing the younger girl to lay her head on a chest with a heart beating so warmly that they didn't need a blanket. Anna settled in, putting her arm around her sibling's stomach, and both relaxed into the couch to paid attention to the third act of their movie.

And Elsa noticed the spark between her legs ignite once more, the feeling of Anna's head resting on the side of her breast fanning it like a billow. They finished their movie, and the entire time, to Elsa, it felt a whole lot like a date. She knew it wasn't, but she could dream, right? She compared it to her nights with Rapunzel, the kissing, her hand resting loosely on a thigh.

All the pretending just roused her up even more. When the flick was over and they were both on their way upstairs to get some rest, Elsa made a decision. "I uh, I think I'm going to take a shower before bed." _I want to invite her to accompany me._ Bathing was only a detail next to what Elsa craved to do in there.

With a mighty yawn, Anna said "Okay, have fun," as an innocent joke.

Elsa couldn't help the wry smile or the automatic "I will," as she grabbed a towel and reminisced about all the sights and sensations she so thankfully was able to experience that day. She locked the bathroom door, removed her clothes, and started the water running. She savored the feeling as she slowly slide her hand down her body, starting off before she even stepped into the shower by lightly rubbing back and forth on her labia. It was slick, already soaked from her evening with her sister.

She gasped as it pulsed, biting hard on her lip to suppress any unnecessary noise as she increased the intensity of her activity. She couldn't tell if the hot water or her arousal was steaming up the room as she worked a little deeper into herself, her fingers sliding easily and her legs becoming so weak that she had to support her weight with her free arm when she brushed her clitoris.

Elsa's labored breathing became erratic and loud, her eyes clamping shut as she imagined her sister's stomach and all of the lost opportunities with the sauce. They flowed in like a strike of thunder, jarring her mind and feeding the blaze between her legs. She stepped into the shower, laying in the tub and letting the falling water aid her fingers, able to pretend that every drop was Anna's doing. She gasped and got lost in ecstasy for God knows how long.

* * *

Elsa quietly exited the bathroom after rinsing off. Her knees were still wobbly from her main course and her cheeks were bright red, because she knew she'd see Anna soon and everything was still so _fresh_ in her mind, yet it felt as rooted as an _ancient_ tree.

Wearing nothing but a towel, she stepped into her room. She hadn't even thought about it, really, where Anna would be. But standing _right there_ wasn't one of the places she expected. Elsa jumped back as she heard "hey, Blondie!"

"Ah-Anna, hi." She was already changed for the night into her usual gown.

Anna just kind of stared for a moment. It really put Elsa under the Gaze, she didn't exactly feel embarrassed, though. Okay, well maybe a little, but she also kind of felt excited. She was wearing nothing but a _towel_ in front of Anna. She had to shake her head of thoughts before anything started inside of her. _Too late._

"Well um, I'm gonna go brush my teeth while you change." Anna rushed out of the door before Elsa could answer or really even focus on her.

And Elsa was alone for the moment. She stepped into the closet and shut the door to make sure she wasn't walked in on. She removed her towel, put on some new underwear, and went to grab her nightgown. But she noticed something out of place. Elsa furrowed her brow when she saw a green dress that definitely didn't belong to her. She examined it and looked around. The more she looked, the more articles of clothing that didn't belong to her she saw. In fact, there was a rather large chunk of such clothes all hung up and placed together.

She was confused, but she gulped when she noticed some foreign underwear off to the side. Elsa's heart beat harder. She took a moment to collect herself, put on her night gown, and grabbed a shirt that clearly belonged to Anna.

She found said red head already on the bed, waiting when she left her closet. Before Anna could say anything, Elsa lifted the dress with her eyebrows raised expectantly. "Anna," was all she said.

Freckles hid behind the shelter of a red blush. "I um, I just thought, you know, it might be easier if I moved some of my stuff in, since I've been sleeping in here and everything it made sense, you know?"

Elsa bit her lip in what she hoped looked like thought. In reality, since her hands were full, it was a substitute for a pinch while she was checking if she was dreaming. She poured over the thought again and again. _Anna's basically moving in with me._

"I can move them back, I didn't mean to intrude and I totally understand if you want your space-"

"Anna," Elsa sternly said. "It's okay, I- I don't mind."

The younger girl seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. "Oh good."

"In fact," the elder smirked, "I think it's a great idea."

That's when aquamarine eyes _really_ lit themselves to teal. "Great! Now come to bed," came the demand.

Elsa, again, had to shake her imagination like a dog shakes off water. She smiled and climbed in, pushing up next to her sister and wrapping her arms around her. The proximity was beautiful torture. Anna lifted her head and leaned in until her lips were mere millimeters from Elsa's cheek, who was grinning in anticipation. Elsa could feel the trickle of fresh, hot breath on her face. It left a skin scorched red in its wake, causing tremors in Elsa's heart and dryness in her mouth.

This was one of the best parts of Elsa's day. She closed her eyes as Anna's lips touched the corner of her own. For just that moment, she lost all sensation beyond that singular point of contact, because that's all she needed.

And when it was over, she still had the beating heart of her sister right next to her as Anna lay her head down on Elsa's chest, settling in. Elsa sighed happily, but couldn't relax. She had to calm her over-wired mind down, shifting her head restlessly in a fight to find a comfortable position, mirroring the turning memories of parading by Anna in a towel and Anna's kiss in her head.

Making it even more impossible to find sleep was the younger girl's hand softly rubbing back and forth on Elsa's body. A tired, innocent roam no doubt, but it sure didn't feel that way.

Life was good.

* * *

It was easy for Elsa to spend the next day chipping away at her own work while Anna was in class. She had a lot to catch up with, after all. But now it was almost time for Anna to get home, and Elsa wanted to look nice for her. She had an idea about what to wear.

Elsa stripped her t-shirt and jeans off and tossed them in the hamper. She looked around her closet and managed to catch a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She wasn't completely naked, but she was exposed enough to really look at herself. She didn't want to face her own eyes at first, but was pleasantly surprised by what she found in them: light. Yes, she was still terrified of the world, and yes, she could still tell just by _looking_ at herself, but there was something different about her.

She looked more confident, more secure, she looked _stronger._ She knew the glint in her eye was because of her now closer than ever relationship with Anna, and that was most likely also a big part of the reason for her dauntless appearance, but it couldn't be the whole reason, right?

No, Elsa didn't think so. She thought about how much she'd been through recently with Rapunzel, Hans, and Anna, and decided her mind must be just like a muscle. It starts to break down when you stress it, but once you take a rest it will heal stronger. Maybe it wasn't just Anna making Elsa a better person, but herself as well.

The girl gave herself a quick nod and spun to find what she wanted to wear, stopping for a few moments when she saw one of Anna's more lacy pairs of underwear. Her mouth went dry and heart felt rigid. She eventually refocused on the clothes that Anna had taken upon herself to move in. _Well, since she felt free to put her stuff in my closet..._

Blushing and a little nervous about doing such a thing, the platinum blonde reached for one of her younger sister's dresses. She had to choose carefully, as Anna's bust was _certainly_ smaller than her own and she didn't want any wardrobe malfunctions while wearing said article. She chose a modest, lilac purple dress. It was simplistic in nature, having no notable laces or belts, sporting a full length skirt, long sleeves, and a collar that was high enough that it covered the sternum.

Elsa checked herself in the mirror once again, approving of how well her bust fit in the dress. She had her usual lipstick on, and the dress fit her curves a little tightly, but nothing obscene. She could hear her nerves rattling like a maraca, as she was unsure of how Anna would react. She really hoped her sister would take it well. Good thing she didn't have long to agonize over every possible permutation of negative outcomes.

Just minutes after she put on the dress, Elsa heard a car door in their front yard, and she made sure she was as close to the door as she was comfortable with when Anna walked in. That's when Elsa noticed that, when Anna was in the doorway, she was more comfortable in front of it. She wore her normal jeans and t-shirt for class. "Elsa, I'm- what in the world are you wearing?" Her tone was far from stern, her lips were upturned into one red cheek in amusement and she had one eyebrow raised.

Elsa breathed an internal sigh of relief at Anna's reaction and let her worry morph into fuzz and butterflies all around her stomach. "Well, you saw fit to go ahead to move your stuff into our room, so I thought it was only fair."

Anna bit her lip with a devious smile. " _our_ room, huh?"

Blue eyes widened and seared porcelain cheeks. "I m-"

"I guess that makes it _our_ closet," the red head pushed, "and _our_ clothes, right?"

Elsa was beet red, but her stomach was oozing warm honey and uplifting her heart on clouds. "I s-suppose it does," she played along.

With an evil grin, Anna said "be careful what you wish for."

 _Oh, I don't think I will be._ "What are you gonna do? _Wear_ my clothes to death?"

"I guess you'll just have to wait and see," Anna replied with mock hauteur.

Elsa was about to have a heart attack, she was sure. This was overwhelming, this was like sitting in a sauna in the middle of a hot tub. "I simply can't wait." Elsa took the following moments of silence to examine dilated blue-green eyes. What a lovely color it was, honestly. And after a few seconds of not even mice daring to break the silence, Elsa realized that her sister _didn't_ have a response. Elsa had won. She grinned, a little gratified with herself.

But then she noticed a nervous tick, and she knew Anna had something on her mind before the girl even said anything.

"Oh, Elsa, I um, I spoke to Rapunzel." Anna was quite demure about what she was saying. She was kicking her foot against the floor lightly and clamping her hands behind her back. Her body appeared unable to sit still.

Elsa's heart dropped. There was a confusing mixture of dread and anticipation. At the same time that she _wanted_ to know about what Rapunzel said, she _didn't_ want to know. The emotions were like water and oil trying to mix. "Oh, um, h-how is she? w-what'd she say?"

Anna stepped forward, almost possessively. "She's doing okay, she said she'd- to give her a little more time and she'd- she'd call you when she's ready to talk again."

A lump formed in Elsa's throat. It burned and ached, and she noticed her eyes tearing a little. It wasn't from despair, at least Elsa didn't think so, but some sort of reaction to knowing that she hadn't, in fact, ruined a wonderful friendship. She actually felt a little lighter. "Th-thank you, Anna."

One side of Anna's mouth turned up and her eyes became as entrancing as a calm, evening fire. It was a look that made Elsa feel cozily at home, made her happy with her life, made her forget about her ailment, just while she was looking into those lovely eyes. "Of course. Anything for you." She paused for a moment. "Oh, and Elsa, you look amazing in my dress."

Elsa's heart fluttered and blushed. "Thank you." Anna looked more relaxed now, so the elder closed the remaining gap between them and softly hugged her. She could have made it tight like normal, she could have been extra careful to make it feel sisterly, but she wasn't. She made it soft and tender, she made it loving, she just hoped that Anna didn't understand the message that she was sending. Because if she did, she'd know about Elsa's feelings and everything would fall apart, like a house of cards in the wind.

Anna didn't seem to, because she purred and sank into the embrace, resting her head upon Elsa's shoulder. There were a few minutes of placid silence, only broken by Anna's soft, mellifluous voice. "So um, there this... thing coming up."

Elsa pulled back, hands on either one of her sister's shoulders, and raised an eyebrow. She couldn't help but be a little nervous. If there was a 'thing' coming up, as Anna so eloquently put it, it meant that Anna was going to go somewhere. And her demeanor boded well for the crawling discomfort atop Elsa's nerves. "A 'thing,' huh?"

"Y-yeah, a thing."

After remaining silent momentarily, the elder pushed "care to elaborate?"

Anna bit her lip and tucked some hair behind her ear, cheeks rosy red and once again taking a slightly defensive stance. Elsa choked on her heart. "Okay, this is gonna sound a little crazy, but please, listen, okay? I mean, it might still sound crazy but just hear me out."

Elsa gulped and nodded.

"So I saw this flier for this Christmas Ball coming up-"

"Christma-"

"Shh, listen," Anna snapped.

"Okay, okay."

"Anyway, a flier for this Christmas Ball that's happening at my school coming up and it looks nice, everyone's gonna be dressed up all n-nice, and I thought, well, I kinda thought it'd be fun to go with you." Anna's face was flushed like a drainpipe, Elsa could feel the heat radiating from where she stood.

But she was too stunned to focus on it. Anna wanting to go to a _ball_ with her! It was as close to a dream come true as she'd ever experience, of that she was sure. It wasn't like it was uncommon for sisters to go together if they didn't have dates, at least it wasn't rare in the movies, but still! Elsa's dream, however, was squashed by the deplorable monster of her phobia as it was birthed into fruition. _It_ wouldn't let her be happy, it wouldn't let her leave the house. A thick pain developed in her throat, like she was choking on something and her eyes began to blur and burn. "Ah-Anna I-"

"But the thing is," the younger girl continued, seeming to completely ignore her elder, "I know that you- well that it would be really hard for you to leave the house." She had Elsa's attention again, if only barely, over such a devastating internal strife. "So I thought, well I thought that we could have our own." Anna kept her head down shyly, but pointed her hopeful eyes up at Elsa's, chewing her lip like gum.

Elsa could only open and close her mouth, trying to talk, but failing. One minute ago she was near despair, but it was like her entire frame of reference was swirled around, disorienting her. Her phobia was eliminated from the equation, an un-needed constant tossed away as another equation was derived from her old one. A new, simpler, happier one. One based almost solely on her dreams. She was still crying, but it didn't hurt any more. "Y-yes, I'd- I'd- I'd love that."


	16. Early Warning Signs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay. Should be able to have another chapter up either tonight to tomorrow before work :)

Once she actually managed to fall asleep, Elsa found it to be some of the most rejuvenating rest she'd had in years. This whole sleeping next to Anna thing had many upsides, all as shiny as the many faces of a diamond. She stretched her arms up serendipitously like a refreshed feline and yawned.

"Anna," she whispered, shaking softly the shoulder of her sister. It was a nice feeling, having the duty of waking her Anna up and _not_ having a fit because of it.

The red head rolled and smacked her lips, groaning softly in the process.

Shaking harder now, Elsa repeated "Anna, it's time to get up." in a more assertive voice.

She mumbled something incoherently before rolling over and grunting "fine I'm up, I'm up."

"Finally," Elsa playfully grouched.

Anna just grinned and struggled to hold open her eyes. "Watch it, you."

Elsa giggled. "Now, get ready for class."

Rolling her eyes, the younger sister whined "yes, _mom_ ," as she gyrated out of bed to the shower. Elsa noticed immediately how much larger and less inviting her bed felt without her sister. She had almost forgotten what being it in without Anna was like.

But that was okay, because it was temporary. She spent her time alone in the room envisioning Anna in the shower, imagining every inch of the soft, smooth, luscious skin she desired so much. Her exiguity to stop herself from getting lost in her mind was blatant, synergistic with her wanton love of Anna.

She almost didn't notice when her sister walked back through the door _in nothing but a towel._ Elsa's mouth dried like salt, gulping down a flabbergasted heart. She tried to bully her extant arousal into running away, as it was just _too_ much to see Anna so _exposed._ It was the first time Anna had done such a thing. The towel hung loosely on her bust, coming down only to her upper thighs, showcasing every curve and muscle the younger girl had down there.

Elsa realized Anna had said something, but it was too late to hear it, so she blurted "I-I'm gonna go sh-shower." She darted out like a frightened cat. She took a slightly cool shower, the water almost sizzling and evaporating when it touched her flaming red skin. It gave her time to collect herself, though, which was good.

She dressed in a towel, just like Anna, and gathered her nerves. If Anna did it, it was okay for Elsa to, and it would be _thrilling._ She shuffled back to their room.

And Anna was sitting on the bed, waiting. This time, however, Elsa was ready for it. She was able to focus more on the thrill of being so close to _naked_ in front of her sister and ignore the embarrassment. The tension from it slithered down her spine, a plodding sensation, staunchly growing in her nether regions in any such situation, making her knees wobble.

"Welcome back, Blondie" Anna said, and it must have been the filter in Elsa's ears that made her hear it with a slightly lewd undertone.

Elsa shook her head. She heard wrong, right? "Thank you," she replied, trying not to sound seductive. Her sister wore blue jeans and a long sleeved, blue shirt. Elsa liked that color on her, it made her heart flutter like an Autumn butterfly.

In the subsequent silence, Elsa imagined Anna's eyes roaming every inch of her skin. It made her shiver and feel exposed yet comforted at the same time. "Well um, I- I'm gonna go change."

She caught it when Anna very briefly chewed on her own lower lip. "and I'm gonna- gonna go eat breakfast."

Elsa smiled. "Okay."

Nodding quickly, the red head chimed, "okay, d-don't be long."

Anna vanished and Elsa walked into their closet. She put on some jeans and a long sleeve white shirt. She wore green panties. They weren't Anna's, Elsa had owned them before because green always reminded her of her sister, for obvious reasons.

She didn't _have_ to wear long pants or sleeves, but she wanted to dress as if she'd go outside because, well, it felt just a little less like she was stuck in this house against her will. It gave the illusion of choice. With a smile plastered on her face, she went downstairs to see her sister before classes.

They sat down and ate a simple breakfast together. It was quiet, but a good quiet. A comfortable silence that didn't need breaking.

That's not to say that Elsa was upset when Anna spoke. "You know," she started, twirling her foot restlessly.

Elsa raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

The rosy paint on her sister's cheeks made the elder feel warm inside. "You don't _have_ to wear that, right?"

Elsa's heart stopped. She really tried to fend off the heat of her blush, but it melted her like fire on ice, eradicating any solidity her body once had and making her entire being wobble. "W-what?"

Anna's eyes widened in shock. "No no- I- I mean, um, I mean, you d-don't have to wear j-jeans, not y-you don't have to wear c-clothes uh, I- you c-can wear something else, r-right?"

Mentally, the older girl was fanning herself furiously. "I-I suppose s-so."

This made the red head smile awkwardly, still trying not to fumble because of her earlier comment. "Th-then you c-could wear a d-dress? Sorry, it's just 'cause- I just like it when you wear dresses."

Elsa just about did a back flip. "Y-yes, of course. Which one should I wear?"

Anna stood tall and inflated like a helium balloon. "Surprise me."

Dainty fingers hid red lips as Elsa giggled. "Okay." They hugged goodbye, Anna planting a sure kiss on Elsa's cheek, summoning the scintillating feeling of butterflies in her stomach and toasting the room. As Anna left, Elsa stood a little closer to the open door than normal.

* * *

 _Okay,_ Elsa thought as she entered her room, _what would Anna like?_ She looked around their closet, inundated with colors of dresses galore. She was still giddy from her sister's blatant admission a few minutes prior. She bit her lip. She wanted to pick the perfect thing to wear.

The new, green dress she ordered with Anna hung and she had a staring contest with it as she decided whether or not it was the proper time to galvanize it. It felt like she was staring at a conscious being for a few seconds. "No," she whispered, as if explaining herself to the garment, "I'll wear you later."

But she still wanted to look especially good for her sister, considering the specific request. It flooded Elsa with joviality and bolstered her confidence to a daring level. She felt _special._ After narrowing her eyes and analyzing the room as if she was trying to scare Sparticus into admitting who he was, her eyes lit up. Elsa changed into a dress and looked in the mirror to make sure she was exhilarated with her choice.

She wore a full length, white dress with a baby blue snowflake pattern dancing across it, just like the flakes were softly falling from the sky. At mid thigh height, the skirt transitioned into the same cyan that the snow flakes were, but here the color was solid, not just a simple pattern, like the ground the snow was landing on. The fabric was thick, Elsa imagined it'd be quite comfortable to go outside in the dress, which fulfilled her desire to dress normally _and_ Anna's wishes.

Okay, well, maybe the dress wasn't _completely_ warm, as the bodice was cut relatively low and there were no sleeves, just thin straps over the shoulders. Elsa had a complimentary coat for the gown, but she preferred to not use that part. Her cleavage was poking out enough that one could appreciate how full her chest was, but not enough to be considered overtly revealing. She blushed as she thought about how Anna would _hopefully_ notice that. It made her stomach shake like a jackhammer.

For now, though, she needed to read her power points. After all, exams were coming up and she didn't want to be unprepared. She pulled up her coursework and quickly learned that focusing was going to be a chore that day.

Elsa freshened up in the mirror, ensuring that she looked her absolute best for her sister. She applied make up in temperance, using it to only accent her natural skin. Soon enough, Anna was pulling in to the driveway and Elsa was checking herself over one last time. She smiled and went downstairs.

"Elsa," Anna hollered as she walked in, which just so happened to be right when Elsa was arriving at the bottom of the stairs.

She grinned a little timidly as she made her appearance. "How was class?"

There was a pause in time while Elsa watched Anna look her up and down. Elsa could feel her sister's eyes roaming her and it made her shiver in delight. It was as if it tickled her everywhere that Anna looked, and she had the time to examine how Anna's bottom lip was retracted underneath her teeth. It was mind-numbing. Elsa blushed deeply.

"It was- It was good- Elsa wow, that dress looks- looks amazing!"

This only served to feed the billowing flames across the elder's face and chest. She hid her eyes on the ground. "I hoped you'd like it."

"Like it? I love it!" There was a moment of silence, and Elsa could _feel_ her sister's wry grin. "It's sexier on you than your other dresses."

Elsa froze. No, that wasn't right, she was boiling, stiff as stone, melting in a pot. _She noticed my chest._ Good _lord_ it was like a sudden fire split her from the middle and was ripping her insides and tearing her apart. The shock of arousal was dangerously powerful, demanding, and starved. "I- uh, y-yeah, th-thank you- I-"

Anna giggled, hiding her teeth with her fingers as she did. "You're cute when you're flustered."

That didn't help the situation. Elsa's vision was spinning around and she had to focus to keep her balance. Anna had her on the verge of swooning. "I, you- I-"

With more snickering, the younger sibling put her arm in her elder's. "Come on, we've both gotta study for exams."

And as she was led to the couch, all Elsa could think about was how _glad_ she was that she'd be able to sit down. "Y-yes, exams."

They perched on the sofa, so close together that they were practically morphing in to one another. For a while, Anna seemed perfectly content with life to hum and read her notes while Elsa had to try to survive with a heart beating faster than a hummingbird's wings.

* * *

It had been a couple hours, a wonderful couple of hours. The girls sat in relative silence, but what their mouths didn't say, their actions did. Anna would brush her arm against Elsa's rather frequently, making the elder shiver inside and out. In retaliation, Elsa would purr and lean her head on Anna's.

At one point, Elsa managed to focus on her studies to such a point that she became oblivious to her body's actions. Her hand gained a mind of its own and the disobedient little bugger started softly brushing back and forth on Anna's thigh. Had Elsa been drinking tea, she would have spat it out when she realized what she was doing. She snapped her arm away faster than a mousetrap. The air felt like peanut butter.

 _Please let Anna have not noticed- what am I even saying? Of course she noticed! I was stroking her_ leg _!_ Whoa, that was a joltingly pleasant thought. _I was stroking Anna's leg._

"Elsa."

The voice brought her out of her little spurt of imagination and thrust her against the hard wall of reality. Anna probably found that really weird. "Y-yes?"

There was a slight pause. Elsa held her breath like it was a castle of cards.

"Why'd you stop?"

Elsa looked at those big, pretty, loving teal eyes. Her face said playful, but something deep in the younger girl's eyes whispered about confusion and loss. _That_ made Elsa's heart race. "I- um- b-because I- I thought you'd get a-annoyed."

Anna hugged her from the side. "I could never get annoyed at you," she stated matter-of-factly, nuzzling her cheek into Elsa's deltoid. "Plus, it felt nice."

Elsa choked on how dry her mouth went. "I- well- wait, it did?"

"mm-hm," the red head nodded and reached towards her elder's leg. "See?" Okay, Elsa definitely heard something flirtatious in the tenor of her sister's voice, something in it that sounded suggestive, she _wasn't_ going crazy! _Or am I?_

She didn't have time to think about such musings as a tingle erupted from her thigh. She tried to prevent herself from arching and her hair from standing on end like a scared cat's, but she couldn't. She couldn't think over her vociferous heartbeat, her struggling breath, her _demanding_ throb. She'd need to excuse herself and change her underpants if she wasn't careful, because this was the most deliciously tactile sensation she'd ever felt.

It was a series of delightful waves following Anna's hand traversing her body, like the wake of a ship. Elsa stifled a moan. "Y-yeah." Her eyes slid shut seamlessly as she leaned back and absorbed everything.

She felt Anna's head rest once more against her arm. She was easily able to slip in to thinking this was a date, and she didn't want to climb out of her delusion, it was too inviting. She let the silence sift between them.

"So," Anna said after a few minutes, getting Elsa to look at her. The scratching stopped, to Elsa's dismay, and her sister withdrew a little bit. As if to offset these negatives, the elder rested her hand on Anna's thigh.

"So what?" Elsa was nervous because Anna was nervous.

"I've been- I've been thinking and I know you're- you like women."

Elsa furrowed her brow, heart stopping dead and stomach churning over. Those were _not_ butterflies. That fact had never been a secret from Anna, at least not since Elsa figured it out herself, but it was a weird thing to bring up, wasn't it? _Why_ was she bringing it up? _Oh no, is Anna gonna try to set me up with someone again?_ Elsa went in to instant panic mode. "Y-yes?"

"But I- I don't really know your type." Anna was making an insanely adorable almost puppy-dog face at Elsa and it partially melted away the elder's internal struggle. There still was, however, the distinct possibility that Anna was trying to set her up with someone else, and Elsa loathed that idea.

"M-my _t-type_?"

"Yeah, you know," Anna said, bobbing her head back and forth, "what kind of women do you like?"

"W-what w-women?" Elsa understood the question, but she just couldn't solve the disconnect between her mind and her mouth.

Anna rolled her eyes. "Oh come on, Elsa, you know, like do you prefer blondes or brunettes," the girl counted off on her own fingers as she spoke and paused for just a moment, as if hesitating, "or maybe redheads?" Anna was biting her lip and Elsa was having a heart attack.

 _I prefer you, just... you._ She, unfortunately, had to hold that thought with an iron grip so it didn't get free. "I guess I... I," _you have to answer her, come on, say something, but not too much!_ Elsa was sweating bullets, resisting a powerful need to fan herself off.

"Fine, fine, I'll go first," the younger said, to Elsa's sweet relief. "I," Anna said, looking a little self-conscious from what Elsa could tell, "have always preferred blondes." Her cheeks were more red than her hair, her head tilted slightly down as if to let any judgment slide off.

And Elsa choked on the air she was _already_ struggling to breathe. For a moment, her vision evanesced and she had to stop the room from running circles around her. Her heart thumped like a kick drum. It was all so distracting. She hid the intense red on her cheeks, but did nothing about the pulsating heat thriving upon her entire body. "B-blondes," Elsa whispered, still sluggishly processing that _she_ was the kind of girl that Anna liked. "Women?"

Anna looked like she might be blushing harder than Elsa now. The elder already knew that her sister was bisexual. She just had to be sure she heard the hair color correctly, because she didn't believe what she had just heard. She just... hoped, deep down, that she was right. "Y-yeah, women, too."

"Blonde women," Elsa reiterated under her breath, looking off to the side and focusing on nothing, because she was describing _herself._ Elsa's body was lost in chaotic tremors. "Like me." She didn't even realize it slipped out until Anna's overly-loud voice commandingly shifted the focus of their discussion.

"Your turn, what color hair do you like on a girl? Blonde, too? I bet it's blonde, I mean, that'd just be too funny: you and me, liking the same girls, right? But- but that's not important, just- just what hair color do you like?"

Elsa wished she didn't have to answer, it'd be so much easier to just pretend this all wasn't happening and shut herself off like an oyster savoring a pearl. And although it was nearly a minute before she was able to make any vocal utterance, she had to speak. Trying her best to stay afloat in the wild waters of her mind, she muttered "I- I um, I l-like-" and cut herself off. She could lie, lead Anna astray and not risk her gleaning the truth. _No, I'm done lying to her._ "uh, I- I like blondes, too," She said, trying to ease herself into honesty.

She didn't look at Anna during the short, subsequent silence because she was busy taking a deep breath and readying herself to finish what felt like a heinous confession. She whispered before Anna responded. "B-but I prefer r-redheads."

"It's almost like we're meant to be," Anna joked after just a few seconds being quiet, punctuating it with a light punch to Elsa's shoulder, making the fact that it was facetious crystal clear.

Elsa nearly keeled over. "A-almost." _You're_ perfect _for me._

Anna responded to this with what Elsa could only describe as a depthless smile. Her eyes carried dejectedness like a burden of torture. Everything Elsa was feeling before phased out and the age of concern set in upon her.

"What's wrong, Anna?"

Anna shook her head like she was a dog and her bout of sadness was water. She forced her smile wider, but it looked languid. "Nothing," she said, her voice counter-indicating her point.

Nibbling her lip and creasing her brow in concern, the elder rubbed her sibling's upper arm soothingly and begged "please tell me," in a whisper.

Anna looked appreciatively back, but her face was still bogged down by an unknown assailant that Elsa wanted nothing more than to get rid of. "R-really, it's nothing."

"Anna-"

"Elsa, I just- I'm fine, don't worry."

Anxiety finagled its way through Elsa's heart and stomach like a viper, it must have bit her lungs because breathing wasn't easy. Elsa didn't like this, Anna was keeping something from her, and it had been a while since that happened. She wanted to press on, to explore and learn about her sister's feelings and _what's wrong_ , but remembered what she had told herself when she almost lost Anna. _I can't be too nosy, I have to give her the space she deserves. Anna will confide in me when she's ready._

Elsa forced a smile and squeezed her sister's hands in her own. "Okay."

Though the younger girl was visibly thankful, she didn't say anything. Instead, she smiled and leaned in to Elsa like before. At least Elsa knew that she was somehow helping, even if she didn't know what she was fighting.

Getting back to studying proved to be a task of biblical proportions, and Elsa was able to absorb very little information for the rest of the evening as focus came with a struggle.

* * *

It was Friday, and just over a week was left until their almost-date night. Elsa wasn't thinking about that right now, though, because the doorbell just rang. That rarely happened, so it caught her off guard. Luckily, Anna was home from school already, so she was able to answer for Elsa.

Wanting to stand by her sister's side, the elder hooked her arms around herself anxiously, fidgeting slightly as she stood a few feet back. Anna had a brief conversation with a delivery man and signed for a package. The instant the door was shut, Elsa was by her sibling. "What's that?"

Anna smirked back. " _That_ is a secret." She proudly held the box.

Elsa shot an arch expression at her sister, playing along but also trying to propitiate her curiosity. "Oh come on, _Freckles,_ no secrets, remember?"

After guffawing at the wit, Anna bit her lip and still grinned wryly. "All I can tell you is that it's for _our_ ball."

Elsa's heart leaped. Her more creative side took charge of the situation and got more and more hopeful with each scenario it dutifully produced. Replete with Anna in all sorts of different garbs and accessories. Maybe it was something to set the atmosphere with? The atmosphere- quiet and intimate, just the two of them. Perhaps the package was a pair of heels to go with whatever dress Anna was planning on wearing. Or maybe it was _lingerie._

Elsa coughed. _No, no, stop, it's not that._ But how the image of her sister in black, lacy underwear invaded her mind and flanked her willpower. She could see the smooth legs and freckled skin now, every curve, almost everything revealed as Anna walked towards her with a distinctly seductive sway in her hips. She tore the image out of her mind and stifled the fire roaring between her knees as best as she could. "That just makes me more curious."

She extended her hand to Elsa's shoulder, as if comforting her. "Don't worry, you don't have much longer to wait."

Elsa sharply frowned and artificially saddened her eyes, trying to look indistinguishable from a puppy. "Please, prettiest, sweetest sister in the world?" She elongated the word to add to affect.

Anna rolled her eyes. "Puppy dog faces don't work on me, no matter how cute they are, or how flattering."

Elsa blushed ferociously, tilting her head away as if the slight obscuring of her features gave her privacy. "I guess I'll just sneak a peak when you're not expecting it."

"Oh yeah? And how do you plan on doing that?"

It was Elsa's turn for a devilish smirk. "I'll wait until you're fast asleep and open it up."

"And how," Anna questioned smugly, "do you plan on finding it?"

Lifting her chin and shrugging in mock pride at the genius of her plan, the older simply said "it's bound to be somewhere in our room."

There it was again, that flicker of despair in Anna's eyes, as transient as a flash of lightning and just as noticeable. It made Elsa's heart drop into a heavy trench in her stomach. _Did I say something wrong? Why's she so protective of that box? Why's she acting distant?_ Maybe Elsa was blowing things out of proportion. After all, Anna had been far from distant recently, but Elsa definitely saw the early warning signs. Anna was withdrawing from her again and that terrified Elsa more than everything outside of that front door.

Anna clearly tried to keep playing along, but her tone had lost it's natural flutter. "I'll just have to hide it better."

Elsa nodded, concerned but unknowing whether or not she should bring up what she'd just noticed. Maybe she should keep giving Anna a little space and draw attention to it if she becomes more distant. _I'll do that,_ Elsa assured herself, hoping that she was making the right decision. "I suppose so."

The conversation died down at that point, leaving both girls uncharacteristically uneasy with each other's presence. "I'm uh, I'm gonna go hide this, be right back!"

Waving a little forlornly, Elsa forced a smile and said "hurry back" in a low voice.

* * *

Luckily, by that night, Anna's odd mood and the palpable tension it surrounded Elsa with had faded. They were snuggled together under the blankets and Anna seemed to be pressing farther in to her elder than normal, if at all possible.

Elsa loved it. She cherished every single second of their closeness because she didn't know when or if a divide between them would start forming, or how rapidly. It could become a massive ravine in a matter of days, just like before, or maybe it would amount to nothing, more akin to a crack in the sidewalk.

She hoped it was the latter.

* * *

The next week brought forth copious amounts of studying, which meant lots of cuddling with Anna on the couch. They struck their normal positions and would sit there for hours trying to ready themselves for their imminent exams.

But before that was their ball, and it was coming up as rapidly and jarringly as a freight train. Elsa didn't know what to wear, or if she should put up decorations. _Should I cook us dinner? Dessert?_ With each idea of hers, she made it sound like more of a date night than a dance. Not that that was a _bad_ thing.

It was Wednesday, and Elsa was in her- their- closet _freaking_ out about what to wear in just three days' time! She had a plethora of dresses, her closet packed with limitless options of dress, but she couldn't choose. She wanted to look like a queen yet cute. She wanted to be commanding and _sexy_ but still herself. She looked at the rainbow around her: blue, green, magenta, white, pink, it all swirled like a row of melting crayons in her vision.

"Elsa?"

"ANNA!" Elsa jumped like a startled cat and shrieked just as loud.

"Sorry," the younger girl said, wincing quite overtly. "I didn't mean to startle you."

Resting her hand atop a racing heart, the elder assured "it's- it's okay, I was just- I was..."

Raising one eyebrow, the strawberry blonde suggested "looking at all the pretty dresses?"

Elsa sighed like she was just exonerated in court. "Y-yes," she confirmed. After all, she wasn't _lying,_ just leaving out _why_ she was looking at the dresses. Anna would have to speculate about that on her own.

"Well, I do hate to interrupt you during such _important_ business, but it's time to work with your goggles a little bit."

Fomented nerves began to simmer. Dread lurched down the elder's throat like a spider and bit her stomach. Elsa exhaled tactfully. "Y-yeah, okay."

Anna took her hand and led her down stairs. "Come on."

Elsa took a deep breath, feeling it stretch her lungs, and exhaled slowly and purposefully, forcing all of her disorderly nerves in line. "You can do this, I believe in you," the younger girl said. The sensation of Anna rubbing her back reassuringly sent shivers down her spine and helped her to put on her virtual reality goggles.

Elsa smiled. "Thank you," and she slid her headset on.

Just blank streets, and Elsa started moving. Her heart rate increased like the ticking of a time bomb as the seconds dripped by like molasses. She could feel the pit in her stomach opening up to release the beast of her phobia, which solely intended to ravage her will and destroy her sanity. But she fought it, she pressed it down and trudged on, focusing on the hand on her back and the love of her life at her side.

"Keep it up, Elsa, you're doing great. I'm gonna turn on cars and sounds."

Elsa gulped and nodded. "Okay," she breathed tensely.

"Don't worry," came Anna's pleasantly smooth voice, "I won't let anything happen to you."

The sentiment caused Elsa's fear to lose some ground. "I-I'm ready."

A car flew by Elsa, causing her to jump away and begin to panic. The low sound of its tires on pavement hit her like a stun gun. She squeezed her eyes shut, warring the tears slipping out.

"It's okay, Elsa!"

 _Do this for Anna._ She opened her eyes once more, revived by the pat on her back. She trained her vision on a close point along the sidewalk and forced her leaden legs to carry her there, then moved her goal a few more feet away. She was dizzy, but she was moving, for Anna. She pretended that every step she took brought her closer to their dance, and the drive that created within her was able to pull her out of the bank of terror for a few moments.

Elsa was getting farther than she ever had before, she was walking with _cars_ driving by her, she just had to keep her mind on Anna.

Anna's support, Anna's plan for the ball, Anna's secret box, Anna's weird mood. Elsa froze, anxiety turning her stomach to stone. Elsa wondered once again if her sister was drifting away from her, if she was going to lose her _again._

This unfortunate second created a rift wide enough for a monster to scramble out of its cage within her body and torture her with anxiety. It built up and up, choking her breath away and smacking her knees out of under her. Elsa's panic attack made her life go black and she screamed as a car came her way, tears lacing her cheeks.

In an instant, she was away from the virtual city and the warm comfort of Anna's arms. She clung tightly and sobbed into the strawberry blonde locks of hair. "Shh, shh, it's okay, Sweetheart," came the insistence along with gentle circles on her back.

Elsa whimpered "d-don't leave me" without really thinking.

Anna's voice was low and intimate, truthful. "Silly, I'm not going anywhere."

Elsa gasped as the relief of her sister's words proliferated through her body. She still didn't know what had Anna acting so strange, but now she knew that she didn't have to worry about them drifting. She tightened her grip around her sibling. _Whatever's making Anna sad, I_ will _find out and I_ will _fix it. That, she deserves._ Elsa thought about the ball next.

Just a few more days until _their_ night.


	17. True Family

It was getting late and Elsa was getting tired. That being said, she was starting to feel prepared for her first couple of upcoming finals as she studied away with Anna by her side. She wasn't one-hundred percent focused, but her understanding of the material was waxing as her mind bobbed between Anna and school.

 _Silly, I'm not going anywhere_ still echoed in Elsa's head, a relatively fresh memory from just a few hours prior. It left tingling everywhere it touched within the girl's body, putting her heart on the spot and filling her stomach with the delightful sensation of thousands of butterflies frolicking about.

Despite everything, all the stress, turmoil, and self-loathing Elsa had gone through, that one comment made her feel, at that moment, like her life was perfect. She felt like she had what she wanted, she had Anna, the shining star of her day, the pep to her step, the buzz to her bee. And she knew, she _knew_ that Anna wasn't leaving, ever.

A loving smile stretched the width of Elsa's face as her heart simmered happily in syrupy love. She looked at her stunningly gorgeous sister- who was currently chewing the eraser end of a pencil in impressive focus. Her brows were brought together, eyes unwavering on her notes, and the deformed and probably slobbery pencil clacking slightly as it was gnawed on. That was the only noise that sifted through Elsa's silent contemplation.

Elated, she felt like she _had_ to whisper "I love you," because the emotion was getting so powerful and demanding within her heart that she _needed_ to let some of it out.

Elsa watched as Anna's ear perked up and the corners of her mouth turned upwards. The now grinning redhead looked at her elder, even halting her snacking on her pencil to reply "I love you too, Blondie."

The statement and nickname farther made Elsa giddy inside and out, because she knew those words and that name were hers and hers alone. Her perquisite, her connection with Anna. She smiled and mumbled "you know, I was thinking about you while using the goggles today."

There was a flicker of light from behind the younger sibling's eyes. "Oh yeah," she said with mock skepticism, "what about me?"

Elsa felt put on the spot, not by Anna, but by her own actions. She wasn't prepared for that question, and she needed an answer. But she didn't want to lie. _But I can't really tell her the truth, can I?_ "That you," Elsa started, pausing to give herself ample time to think about her next phrase. She blushed deeply and failed to make eye contact as she admitted "that I was earning our ball as I walked." _God_ her ears felt like red hot peppers.

"So you're looking forward to our dance?" Elsa turned even more red at the playful question.

She decided to tell the truth again, but flip the focus off of herself. It was like rocks piling on top of her, she had to move them, to turn the tables. "Yes, aren't you?"

Scarlet siphoned into freckled cheeks. "Of course I am."

Elsa's heart leaped out of her chest. She had to resist a powerful, peremptory urge to lean in and plant a maladroit kiss on her sisters perfect, smooth, and soft lips. Maybe she could settle for kissing Anna on the cheek.

With that notion, no other thought even had time to wiggle into her mind, Elsa just leaned in and puckered her lips, subconsciously licking them quickly. She only realized what she was doing when she felt the slightly cool sensation of skin in her lips, which were flaring in excitement. She definitely landed her mark: a freckled cheek, and it felt like kissing a battery, the shocking tingle flying through her lips down to her very heart. The impulse made her heart spasm.

It was new, it was electrifying, and Elsa would have been proud of herself if she had any room to feel much else. Anna was always the one to initiate kisses, never Elsa.

She let the smack of her lips tense a silence between them as she pulled away after a couple seconds. She held her breath in the delicate air, waiting for a response. That was a sisterly kiss on the cheek right? _Did I linger too long? Oh no, I gave myself away, I- I should have controlled myself better!_

"Hey," Anna said, her voice stern enough to grab the attention of a gaggle of delinquents. Elsa's heart dropped, she started to panic. That is, until Anna continued talking. "That's my job!"

Elsa had to regain her balance hastily to recover from her mental stumble. She blankly processed her sister's tone and the playful look on her face, trimmed with her scarlet cheeks. "W-well that hardly seems fair," she managed to choke out of her previously clogged throat.

When Anna raised an eyebrow, the elder continued her mock complaint. "You get to kiss me but I don't get to kiss you." Her heart skipped several beats as she said that, it sounded like so much _more_ than it was to her. Elsa felt a familiar and entirely pleasant burning under her ribcage.

"Life's unfair," Anna quipped, quickly leaning in to give her older sister a peck on the cheek, resting her hand on Elsa's thigh as she did so. The simple action fired through Elsa's body like a gunshot, exciting her senses and arousing her nether regions. "Get used to it."

Despite all of the desires, sensations, and feelings tangling themselves throughout her body, Elsa genuinely giggled at her sister's remark. She was opening her mouth to make what was hopefully a witty remark when the distinct creak of the front door swinging open cut her off. It struck cold fear into Elsa's heart, contrasting the warmth it had been enjoying thus far that evening.

She looked, because she couldn't just not do that. It was involuntary, the way she craned her neck to peer at her father, who was now closing the door and turning towards his daughters. In the split second that followed, which felt like much longer, Elsa watched as the air around her became stark and unmalleable. She looked at her sister.

Anna's teal eyes were narrowed slightly, burrowing a hole into their father like an angry, caged animal. She looked _dangerous,_ which is one thing that Elsa _never_ thought her sweet, loving little sister could do. The silent threat Anna was clearly sending her father oozed off of her like a poison, polluting the distilled air.

She suddenly turned and grabbed Elsa's hand, before anyone had a chance to talk. Her face seamlessly transitioned from its former animosity to a mix of concern, love, and worry. At least, Elsa was pretty sure that's what she saw, it happened so fast. "Come on, Elsa, let's go to bed."

Elsa didn't fight it, she allowed herself to be guided by the hand to the safety of upstairs before their father could say a word. She didn't, after all, really want to deal with him right then, because she wasn't prepared. Plus, it was getting late, and snuggling up next to her Anna sounded like just what she needed at that moment.

On their way out, Elsa noticed that her sister shot their dad one last look, as if silently commanding him to keep his mouth shut. The really surprising part, to Elsa, was that he listened.

* * *

Anna was late. She was usually home from class nearly an hour earlier than this, and Elsa, despite herself, was getting antsy. She had gotten no text or call from Anna. Her imagination, which so often provided her with lovely imagery, was working itself over in the worst way. She tried, she _tried_ not to imagine Anna meeting with Hans to talk, even though Anna hadn't brought such a thing up.

 _She could just be stuck in traffic, or talking to a professor or something. What if she's talking to Rapunzel?_ Elsa's eyes widened and heart pounded. That seemed the most likely, and it actually made her physically uncomfortable. On the other side of her mind was the little voice telling her that it'd be _great_ if Anna was talking to Rapunzel, because that'd be one more loose end all wrapped up, one more thing that Elsa didn't have to wonder about. One more mystery solved.

Elsa closed her eyes and massaged her temples, reigning in her emotions and calming herself before anything got overwhelming. Eventually, it worked. Her breaths became less rushed and more regular, her heart ebbed, and her eyelids were no longer clamping shut like clams. _It's okay,_ she reminded herself.

She was just managing to get to her studies when the door finally opened. "Anna," she exclaimed, standing sharply from the couch without actually checking who was at the door.

"Elsa," came the younger sister's reply. Elsa grinned, but before she could say anything, Anna continued speaking. "We need to talk!"

That feeling of dread that Elsa got when she just realized that she had done something wrong, or something was about to go _horribly_ awry swept over her like a storm. "I- what- we do?"

Anna nodded and walked over to the couch. It took a moment for Elsa to follow, as her legs weren't working and her knees felt like they'd drop her at a moment's notice. "After class I went to the park to think."

Elsa didn't want this conversation to happen, whatever it was going to be about. It scared her. Her first reflex was to try to back out of it, but she reprimanded herself. _Stop. It's Anna, let her say what she has to._ Unable to talk, the elder just remained silent, sat down, and nodded to her doom.

"I've been thinking a lot about something I did- something that I shouldn't have done."

Although there wasn't actually a pause in her sister's sentence, Elsa's mind worked fast and the miniscule stretch of time between words was enough for her to imagine several worst-case scenarios.

"And I feel really bad." When teal eyes remorsefully peered at Elsa, it shifted her frame of reference a little bit. She became more concerned with _why_ Anna was feeling the way she was and less concerned with the possible depressing realities.

"It's okay, A-Anna," she began softly, gently resting her arm around her sister's shoulders.

"You don't even know what I'm talking about!" The younger girl barked rather sharply. Elsa was taken aback, physically withdrawing from her sister and sporting hurt feelings. _Anna hasn't lashed out at me since Hans._

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," rushed Anna, snatching Elsa's hands and pulling her back like she was something valuable being dragged out to sea in the undertow. "I didn't mean to snap at you, I just- I'm sorry."

At this point, feeling flat out confused, Elsa urgently asked "Anna, w-what's wrong?"

Again, she was met with the direct gaze of tumultuous eyes. "Remember the anniversary of- er, on the twenty-fifth, when you wanted t-to v-visit m-mom?"

Elsa swallowed a lump in her throat, it ached. Her eyes were boiling alive, beginning to water and simmer. She could see the same response happening in Anna as she broached the subject of their mother. She responded by solemnly nodding and slumping into her sister.

Anna caught Elsa by wrapping her arms around her., and pressing her teary eyes into Elsa's shoulder momentarily. "What I did that day," she started in just a whisper., "wh-when y-you just wanted to _try_ to see her, when y-you _needed_ help, needed _m-me,_ I- I..."

Elsa almost gagged at how harrowing the memory was.

"I just _opened_ the door and yelled at you!"

That moment was crystal clear in the elder's memory. It still felt like a knife freshly sliding into her heart from behind, but she had forgiven Anna. It wasn't her sister that day, it was the girl that Hans was moulding to _give up_ on Elsa. "Anna, I-"

"I exposed you to your worst fears and _abandoned_ you when you _really_ needed me!" Anna's voice was raised and shrill with the sting of evident regret breaking it apart. She paused, during which time Elsa desperately tried to find what words to say, but came up short. Quieter now but in no less pain, Anna said "I know you've already forgiven me for that, but I- I don't deserve it, b-but I'm so sorry, Elsa, I d-didn't mean anything I did that d-day."

Elsa's heart shattered, the raw, sensitive pieces clambering in her chest for life, but inciting grievous pain upon the rest of her body. "I- I know you didn't," she breathed, "I've already for-forgiven you."

This seemed to strike a chord with Anna, but she gushed some more, confiding in her elder. "I w-was just so- so _confused_ about everything! I thought that y-you- that _Hans_ was the good guy! I w-was wound up and- and I shouldn't have done that to you."

Elsa pursed her lips. She really had forgiven her sister already. "It's okay, Anna, I- I know it was a mistake, that- that Hans was manipulating you." She looked the younger girl purposefully in the eyes. "And that's why I forgive you."

Anna shuddered. "I've just been thinking a lot about it and- and I think I really just needed to hear that you say that."

Despite everything swirling around her, all the things that tried to make such an act impossible, Elsa smiled candidly at her sister. "I don't blame you for opening the door in front of me or being short with me."

This appeared to remove an invisible weight from Anna's shoulders as her body relaxed more. "Thank you."

Elsa hugged her tightly. "Of course, silly. You're my beautiful Freckles."

Anna purred and the elder wondered, as they sat, if that was why her sister had been having bouts of dejectedness. If it was, then that all was out of the way, then they could _both_ focus their attention on their dance night. Elsa felt a swell of anticipation in her heart. That had to be why Anna had been upset over the past few days, right? Nothing else made sense. Elsa was almost giddy. Now there was nothing to ruin their ball, no bogies to destroy their night together. _Our practically date night._

That night, with Anna in her arms, Elsa fell asleep a little bit easier, because she was no longer worried about her sister's mood. She placidly relaxed. She could feel Anna's definitely bra-less breasts pressed into her side through their nightgowns, doing a little more than tickling her womanhood as she slowly encroached upon sleep.

* * *

Empty. Elsa groggily turned over and rubbed her eyes. Her bed was empty. It felt weird, confusing. Anna was there last she remembered. She rapidly blinked to allow her eyes to adjust slowly to her surroundings, the comparatively cold draft whistling around her where Anna's body normally lay. For a tired, blurry second she wondered if she slept in and Anna was in class. That theory fell apart when she realized how dark it still was in her room.

She reached over to check what time it was, but heard a shrill voice from far off in the house. "Well why didn't you pay for a REAL psychiatrist!?"

Elsa froze in her spot, like the world would vanish if she stayed still long enough. Even in her groggy, still half asleep state she was able to surmise who was talking to who. And _that_ woke her up quite readily. The tidings of a panic attack quaked through her bones, etching on her grasp of sanity.

"A _real_ psychologist?" The reply was heated, both of them were clearly already worked up and fed up. Elsa winced at the sound of her father's voice. With her mind still booting, she hadn't quite put two and two together to figure out exactly what they were talking about. She did, however, feel like she needed to go support Anna, but she was scared.

"Yeah, a real one," came the frustrated retort. Elsa gulped. Even if Anna didn't _need_ her, she should still be there for her, right? _Yes, I have to go down, I_ want _to go down._ And in spite of her reservations, her pounding heart and nervous breaths, she started walking towards the door, feeling a little cold and exposed in her nightgown.

"There are no _real_ ones!"

There wasn't even a pause before Anna volleyed. "What do you mean by _that_!?"

Elsa found herself walking slowly for two reasons: first, so she wouldn't make noise and would be able to hear the argument better; second, to stall her intrusion on it.

Their father sounded almost offended by the question, like it was hard for him to dignify it with an answer. "I mean they're all fakes, quacks, thieves, they don't _work_!"

Anna didn't yell in response this time, her voice was quieter but still as scalding as steam rushing out of an engine. "How do you know that?"

"I just do!" Elsa was at the top of the stairs now, she had to pause to catch her breath. The hallway was swaying back and forth, spinning and trying to trip her. The light at the bottom of the stairs flooded in like water. She clutched her beating heart. _Anna._

"How!?" The volume had increased, Elsa began her descent, swallowing the dry taste in her mouth.

"It doesn't matter!"

"Yes it DOES! How do you KNOW!?" Elsa flinched at the drastic increase in decibels.

"I just DO!"

Anna shouted, but in an odd, suppressed way, like she was reigning in the wild stallion of her anger, trying not to let it rear too loudly. "HOW!?"

"BECAUSE I SAW ONE AFTER MY WIFE'S DEATH!" This stopped Elsa dead in her tracks, her legs binding like marble statues to the ground. The air of eerie silence that befell the house after was telling. She felt the emotional punch that their dad's sentence implied, so she knew Anna was suffering through it, too. It implicated that Elsa and Anna weren't his daughters, at least not in his mind. It was telling, displaying how he viewed their family dynamic, that it was his wife that died and these two girls were now his burden to live with. A swab of cotton stuck to Elsa's throat, making her gag as tears burned into the bottoms of her eyes.

 _Anna was affected, too._ So Elsa made herself move, she was about to turn the corner, about to step out when her sister's voice moped quietly through the silent, dark house like the whimper of a beaten animal. "Just because a psychiatrist couldn't help you doesn't mean they wouldn't have been able to help Elsa."

Once more the platinum blonde's progress came to an abrupt halt. She'd missed it. In her tired, scared, stressed state, she had completely missed that they were talking about _her._ Elsa wasted a few precious seconds mulling over the situation, and came to the conclusion that the important part was that Anna was standing up for her _again._

So Elsa stepped out as her father rebutted. "Are you kidding? Have you seen her? She's weak, she's beyond help!" He only noticed her as he finished his attack. A flash of surprise followed by grief echoed through his eyes and Elsa felt like she was a child caught peeking by Santa Claus, aside from the stab in the heart she felt. In that flash of time, she was able to put everything together.

 _Dad saw a shrink after mom died._ But that didn't work, did it? He'd been always gone, always at the office since then, to keep himself busy and not thinking, Elsa presumed. But that's the problem, wasn't it? No matter what you do, you'll have time to think. Her father only ever thought of the accident when he saw his own daughters. And he didn't even want to waste the money on a professional to help his own eldest daughter, because he couldn't get past a tragedy.

And Elsa had tried so hard, in her own way, to make their relationship okay again. She had tried to be nice, tried to talk to him, but it was all for not. She came to a devastating realization as she looked into his cold eyes that night. He hated her. Because she never moved on, just like him. She was a failure to her father as much as he was a failure to himself.

Elsa let out a quick, dry, squeak of agony as her heart broke into pieces. It left her so empty inside. She didn't even feel the tears covering her cheeks, or hear her sniffles and sobs. How could someone she trusted _so much,_ someone who she _loved_ just... give up like that!? How could he hate his own daughter?

But not the other. No, he had tried to repair his relationship with Anna in the recent months, Elsa had seen the subtle signs. Because Anna had moved on. Anna wasn't crippled by the mention of their mother, she was strong, and her father needed that.

Elsa didn't even realize that she was on her knees, not until warm hands grabbed her and stood her back up, and a supportive body held her tight. The dampness from her younger sister's crying eyes felt cold on Elsa's shoulder. In a low whisper that was a downright painful sounding mixture of sorrow, anger, and determination, Anna said "she's stronger than you know, stronger than _you._ "

"You watch it, young lady."

"What are you gonna do? Throw us out? Throw out your _daughters_?"

"No, I'll throw _her_ out." Elsa couldn't see, but she could feel that her dad was gesturing towards her.

Anna called his bluff. "No you won't," she threatened, "because if she goes, I go."

This struck a contemplative silence in the man. Elsa dared a peak at him and in just that short time could tell how furious he was at the comment, yet unwilling to take the risk of challenging Anna farther. He grumbled to himself, allowing the fumes of anger to dispel slightly before finally deciding on what his counter would be. "Fine," he remarked, and it was fascinating to Elsa how, inadvertently or not, Anna had their father right underneath her nail.

"Now," Anna said, but in a tone so soft and tender that it startled her elder. "Let's go, Elsa."

Taking just a moment to sniffle and take one last look at her father, the older sibling nodded through the shattered remains of her heart and let herself be guided away. She would have walked of her own volition, but her legs were still stiff as stone and as weak as wet noodles. But Anna had her. Anna was there.

As they entered Elsa's room once more, Anna said something. "I'm sorry, I just- when I think about what he's done I just get so _angry_ , I- I had to know." The burden of regret was heavily evident upon her tone.

Elsa sniffled and sat down with her sister's arms still around her like a protective mother bird's wings. "N-no, it's okay," she said, still a little in shock from her discovery that evening, "I'm g-glad you did." She looked at Anna.

Furrowed brows peered back. "Wait really? But why?"

The younger sibling was almost certainly confused because she had just seen Elsa's feelings devastated by a sick travesty as a _direct_ result of her actions. In Anna's mind, it was her fault that her sister felt this way. "B-because now I know w-why h-he hates me and that he'll n-never be a real f-father to me again." Her voice was broken and riddled with tears. It felt like she'd just lost her dad, the man that used to give her so much when she was so little. In a sense, she had.

Her only true family left was Anna, who was silently contemplating what she had just heard. She didn't contest because she saw it all, too. She bit her lip while watery sympathy swirled with empathy glistened in her eyes like glass. "I'll always be right here for you, no matter what, Elsa." She whispered with conviction, squeezing her elder tight.

That's what Elsa needed. That was the painkiller to her open wound, the water that washed the salt from her torn flesh. She shuddered and slumped on to her one pillar of support. "And I'll be here for you." She didn't even need to say anything else, for everything unspoken between them was told in their intimate and warm interaction.

Anna understood the silence and returned the silent bid of love by letting her head rest loosely on top of Elsa's. They eventually climbed into bed with the help of one another. They remained tightly in each other's embrace, as if their physical connection would cauterize the mental lashes they sustained that night.

* * *

It didn't feel like Friday morning to Elsa. She was up extra early. The sun was still slumbering, the air was still crisp and cool, and the room was darkened with the thick presence that comes just a little while before dawn.

She lay still and just thought, focusing on Anna's presence, on how their bodies were tangled together like a knot of string. It was hard to sleep last night, though, what with everything that happened between the sisters and their dad.

That's what Elsa was thinking about. It left her emotionally stunted, it seemed. She felt like her insides had been drained of all feeling like a sink drained of water: siphoned and dry, unwillingly barren. She was left somewhat forlorn but mostly bereft. It was a strange, surreal feeling, kind of like she was in a dream, like nothing was real.

 _But it was real- it_ is _real,_ she reminded herself as she analyzed the surrealist painting she was laying in. After a shady night's sleep, she was able to mull over her thoughts a little bit more coherently. Nothing had _really_ changed, at least nothing immediately pertinent, except one thing. She now knew it was a waste to pursue a remedy for her relationship with her father. It was terminally ill.

Elsa presumed that she _should_ be crying, but she just felt... empty. Nothing was right in her, everything was off-kilter and out of tune. The hollow inside of her was leaving her mind on a strange but comforting autopilot, so she organized her day.

 _Soon Anna will get up and have breakfast with me, then go to class._ That was normal, so it didn't make a dent in Elsa's emotions. _Then I'll be alone to study all day._ Again, not out of the ordinary. _And tonight we'll-_ She thought for a moment, trying to remember if they had plans. Her eyes widened as she recalled all her excitement for their dance night. She hadn't forgotten, but it had take a little for her mind to start up after the bombshell her father dropped on her the previous night. _Tonight we'll be getting ready for our ball tomorrow._

Most likely separately. After all, Elsa didn't want to spoil the surprise of what she'd wear for Anna. She was sure Anna would feel the same. _Wait,_ she realized with a minor spike of panic, _what_ am _I gonna wear!?_

And thus her day began. Paying attention to the imminent ball allowed her to push her harrowing pain from the previous night away for a later time. It gave her something to focus on, and as long as she was focused on _Anna,_ Elsa couldn't fall too far.

After all, Anna was the most important thing in her life.


	18. A Day of Prep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Skimming this one quick, just a quick warning: some sexual content suggested, nothing super explicit.

Although she was working herself to being ecstatic for _her_ day, Elsa remained steadfastly in bed. She didn't want to move, she wanted to stay with Anna as long as possible that Friday morning. Plus, it was still early. She placidly closed her eyes with a happy sigh, monitoring a tempered heartbeat and squeezing her sister, who was laying fast asleep half on top of her, tightly in her arms.

A red mane of hair covered Elsa's chest in surfeit, spilling its contents every which way as a freckled cheek was squished up against silky fabric on a milky smooth sternum. Anna obviously still lacked a bra, along with Elsa, so the sensation of their bodies touching was closer than the elder ever thought she'd get to laying naked with her sister.

It felt _so close_ , she imagined, and a fire was stoked between her legs. Feeding her flames of desire, since Anna was asleep, after all, Elsa shifted her weight so a boiling thigh fell between her knees. It wasn't quite touching, but it was dangerously close, and Elsa could feel it's presence like iron feels a magnet. Her mouth was drying, the moisture seemingly migrating south on her body and fixating as close as it could to her sister's leg. Elsa, in what she supposed was likely an imprudent decision, _had_ to check herself. She lifted her night gown and snaked her hand up it, slowly but purposefully bringing it against her womanhood, feeling her own warmth emanating like steam before actually making contact.

To put what she felt simply, Elsa was wet. An uncontrollable buck rippled through her hips as she touched, and she gasped on the sharp air around her. Blue eyes clamped shut like clams, she balled her fists and bit her lip. _Not right now_ , _Anna might wake up. But maybe she won't? I mean, I could, just a little- no, no! I can't._

A stir against the sheets made her jump right out of her skin, as if she'd been caught red- or rather wet- handed. She tensely let the silence slide between her and Anna like a wedge. A few seconds passed with Elsa's heart in gridlock before it became clear that Anna wasn't waking up just yet. _Of course she's not getting up yet, this is Anna. Never before has she woken up before I get her up for class._ Elsa chuckled to herself, peering at her little sis with an adoring grin. Her hand began the gentle work of running its fingers along the red head's scalp, a featherweight massage for her sleeping sibling. She used the same hand as when she _adventured_ south a moment ago, which was an exciting feeling.

Elsa didn't realize that over time her hand became more sure and forceful. Still tenderly cautious about the amount of force it was using, but definitely more assertive, too. She kept going as the minutes of molasses dripped by.

And her heart only stopped for a little while when she heard the very faint whisper. "Mmm, that feels good."

A contradicting wave of boiling ice flushed down the older girl's body, making her knees tense and her back arch like a bridge. Her heart drastically picked up the pace and she nervously wondered if Anna could feel that, given where her head was.

"Well don't stop," came the rather mockingly upset tone, causing Elsa to notice that she had, in fact, stopped massaging Anna.

"Oh, I uh," Elsa didn't have time to finish, because an epicenter of tactile overdrive erupted from the edge of her stomach, where Anna had started gently dragging her nails back and forth. The shiver from the massively addictive sensation made her skin stand on end, traveling right up to her neck and pulling the moisture from her mouth and leaving it dry. Her breaths became shallow.

The whole situation felt so new yet familiar to Elsa, so exciting and relaxing, so, dare she think it: intimate. That thought lingered for a moment. The balance beam she was walking, drifting around in the hazy boundaries between sisterly and so much more, _especially_ with the way that Anna's hand was teasing her belly. She cooed and closed her eyes, letting for a little while the sexual tension building within her pile up.

That is, until the gentle scratching on her body stopped, leaving her somehow feeling cold and with the dismay of a sizable loss. Elsa was just opening her eyes to look at her sister and comment, when she saw the lopsided smirk on Anna's lips. "See how it feels?"

A strange exhalation somewhere between a scoff and a chuckle escaped from Elsa. "You spoiled princess," she scolded.

"Oh, I'm spoiled?" Anna inquired with loaded skepticism, grinning and biting her bottom lip as she rolled on to Elsa such that her chest was resting on the elder's. _Hot._ That was all Elsa could think or feel. Anna held intense eye contact, brandishing her finger like a knife and purposefully bringing it towards the abdomen that lay below her, like a surgeon preparing for an incision. "And here I thought I was the one spoiling you." As the younger girl finished her sentence, she punctuated it by once again contacting her sister's obliques with her hand.

Elsa gasped, her shoulder blades once again gently pressing down upon her mattress. Her body was on _fire_ on the inside, searing her between her knees, but the rest of her body was submerged in ice water, the cool of Anna's touch almost painfully contrasting the heat from Elsa's arousal. It made her tingle.

"May-maybe we're b-both a little- ah-ha- uh- spoiled."

"Perhaps we're _both_ royalty," Anna agreed, still letting her fingernails drag across the ribs of her sister's night gown.

Elsa grinned, gaining a little control over herself. "Perhaps."

With a quick wink, Anna retorted "and I expect to be treated that way at our ball tomorrow night."

A loving heart skipped a beat and Elsa momentarily had the wind knocked out of her. Her words came back as fast as boomerangs, and just as forcefully. _You_ are _royalty to me._ Shaking at the flattering, she said "only if you treat me the same."

Elsa was not prepared to blush as hard as the did when Anna's response came. The younger girl lifted a pale, cold hand and gently placed her lips against it. Warm, wet, smooth, inviting. Those are the sensations that shot straight to Elsa's brain and sicced her heart like a Tesla Coil. "But of course, your highness," Anna playfully flirted.

Taking a moment to recuperate after the flirtatious comment knocked the wind out of her, Elsa had to consider her answer. Burning, the elder said "good," raising her chin proudly, much like she imagined a queen would, and waving her hand in a posh manner.

Narrowing her eyes, grinning widely, and shaking her head, Anna quipped "you really are the spoiled one, aren't you?"

"Yes," Elsa carried the playful conversation with, "and I expect you to treat me accordingly tomorrow."

"Oh, you bet I will, Blondie," Anna confirmed in an almost intimidating tone, but with a smile still plastered to her face.

With a smirk, Elsa intensely gazed at her sister, intent on replying. She swiftly got lost in the huge teal eyes looking at her, and her train of thought derailed in a quiet but hectic crash. Her mouth opened and tongue was still, heart swelling at the near contact.

A raised brow looked back. "Nothing? I guess you can say I leave you speechless."

 _Every day, every time I look at you._ "Yes, your eyes are hypnotizing." _Crap!_ Elsa immediately rued her words, covering her rosy red cheeks and lips with her hands. She was so embarrassed she felt like leaning all the way into her pillow and hiding beneath it for the rest of her days. That way, she wouldn't have to see her sister's reaction.

But the reaction was still intriguing to Elsa. Anna's face behaved like a raconteur of emotions for just a second. It seemed like as the sister's spent more and more time acting as close as they were, the more negligent Anna was becoming at controlling how she displayed her feelings. Or maybe Elsa was just becoming more attuned to the language.

Anna clearly considered the phrase for a moment, only then straying in to a slight smile of simple joy and finally on to forlorn longing. At least, that's what Elsa saw, but her mind could have been playing tricks on her. "And I'll make sure to, especially tomorrow."

Okay, Elsa was spent, she had no more energy or brainpower to forge a response, so all Anna got out of her was the subconscious grin.

After a few seconds, the younger girl seemed to acknowledge this fact and crawled farther onto her sister, overweening. Elsa had to take note of the brush of pressure when Anna's chest slid up to hers and rested there. _Oh god, oh god!_ Her hands were yearning to slide between her legs, her core begging shamelessly for attention.

She hardly noticed how close Anna's face was until she felt the quick peck on the corner of her lip and heard the familiar, mellifluous voice chant "I'll take that look to mean you're excited, thank you very much." A fire seemed to stay simmering where Anna's lips touched, sending electrifying goose bumps all the way around Elsa's neck and shoulders.

Elsa gulped. "Y-yeah, I c-can't wait!"

"Neither can I," Anna said with such an aboveboard, soft tone that it felt like a rock hitting Elsa. That coupled with the inadvertent brush of copper hair behind a red ear screamed a level of honesty that they'd only ever given to each other. It made Elsa's heart flutter, and she warmly smiled back. _These_ were the moments she lived for: the seconds that made her feel like her and Anna _were_ a couple, not sisters, like they _could_ be together.

But there was simply no response to be given right then, it would have just been redundant, given her body language. She hugged Anna, even though there were already laying on top of each other, literally.

"But I do have to go to class," came the dismal whine from the little sibling.

"Uh- Y-yes, it's time to get up." She bucked the desire to stay in bed and trap Anna there with her.

The girls rose, ate, and Anna was ready to go in no time. She gave a quick but fiery kiss just by the corner of the lips to Elsa and was out the door. Elsa smiled like a fool. She burned inside with the desire to properly see her sister off, like a normal person. She wavered with apprehension for a moment, dread lacing its icy clutches around her lungs. To fight it, Elsa held her breath and moved towards the front window, her proximity to the outside terrorizing her like the boogie man. She faced her fear and looked out, just a few seconds too late. Anna's car was driving off. She waved at it as it vanished around the corner.

Once that happened, Elsa distanced herself from the window with haste. She was a little proud of herself, looking out that window was always hard, but she did it. She smiled truly and thought of all the time she had to kill. Biting her lip, she ran back to her room. She had unfinished business with her hand.

* * *

 _Study, study, study,_ Elsa reminded herself frequently throughout the morning. Out of necessity, of course. If she didn't, her mind would quickly wander away. She'd begin her prognostications for the next day, begin trying to guess what Anna would be wearing and what exactly they'd do.

She imagined it with dim lights, a slow song, and her and Anna dancing a little clumsily together. Anna would surely rest her head on Elsa's shoulder at some point and they'd relax in to each other. Elsa would feel the soft tingle of hair caressing her cheek and neck. She could almost feel the goosebumps it'd summon, the jumping her heart would be doing. She'd inhale and the smooth, subtle, flowery scent of her sister's hair would saturate her olfactory, springing sunlit blossoms all over her heart and stomach.

Elsa's hand would slowly rub the small of Anna's back, the beating of her heart antithetical to her calm demeanor and-

 _Stop, study! I'm getting off track... again._ Elsa closed her eyes in focus and rubbed her fingertips against her temples for a moment. She didn't have the time today to waste it just yet, not until later. Plus, she didn't want to belie Saturday in her mind, lest she be disappointed. _We're just sisters dancing, that's it, now do your work!_

She crinkled her forehead with the focus of her eyes and began reading her notes. _I'll just read through all my material until Anna gets home, then I'll start trying on dresses for tomorrow._ After all, Anna would want to spend the evening trying on dresses anyway, so might as well corner of Elsa's lip turned up.

* * *

Finally, Anna was there. They did their usual greeting ritual, and Elsa began by reflex waltzing to the couch. It was just so natural feeling, she didn't even think about it. Not until the silence in her ears was interrupted, that is.

"Elsa."

The elder inquired "yes?"

"We should do our homework in your room."

A little perplexed, Elsa confirmed. "M-my room?"

With what the moon-kissed woman could swear was a red glow in the cheeks and a bashful smile, Anna said "yeah, your bed is super comfy, more comfy than the couch."

This elicited a quite accidental giggle and accompanying blush from Elsa as she grabbed her own immaculate braid to nervously fiddle with. "That sounds wonderful."

Up they went, Elsa feeling her heart beating gauchely against her ribs. She was _always_ excited to cuddle with Anna, no matter what the circumstances. _Plus, I don't even have any homework left to work on, so I can fully enjoy it._

Before Elsa knew it, they were getting cozy in her bed, backs up against the headrest. Anna was pulling out her laptop, appearing intent on her coursework before the machine had even started completely. Elsa practically purred as she settled in such that her thigh was flush with Anna's and their shoulders were squishing together.

She just stared at the perfect curve of Anna's button nose, and the creases of intent on her sister's forehead snaking like tiny cracks in otherwise flawlessly freckled skin. She began to feel her chest burn like a match. She had a sudden and overwhelming desire to be _closer_ to Anna, she knew _exactly_ what she wanted, and it tortured her as she gazed at her own amaranthine. She shook her head as if it'd dislodge her thoughts. She shifted in her seat, adjusting to be a little closer to Anna yet, which the younger girl didn't seem to notice, as she was now typing furiously at her keyboard.

"Don't you have some work you should be doing?" The question wasn't scolding or rude, it was light and playful, but still caught Elsa off guard, causing her to blink a few times in thought.

 _I should be doing_ you, _not working._ Elsa tensed her legs as the thought dripped seductively through her mind. "I- err, no, I did it earlier."

Anna's mouth became an uneven grin. "So you're just gonna sit here and watch me work?"

Elsa's heart stopped and her jaw hung loose as a goose. "I- uh- well- do- do you not want me to?"

Just as the younger of the sisters turned her head back to her screen, the elder spied a wide grin on those soft lips and a pinch of red infecting beautiful cheeks. "I didn't say that," Anna replied in a low, almost smug voice.

After letting her poor coronary organ calm down, Elsa smiled through her blush with a devilish grin. "Good, then I can stay here and distract you." She punctuated her sentence by plunging a slender finger into a trimmed, warm side.

Anna shrieked and giggled with a back arched sharper than a scared cat's. "Els-ah!"

"What's the matter? Am I _bothering_ you?" Again, the elder emphasized herself physically, but this time, she opted to lightly tickle her sister. It was either Elsa or the room getting very hot, she couldn't tell.

Laughing uncontrollably now, Anna was curling up with a bright red face, trying desperately to defend herself. "Els- agh!" Anna proceeded to beg for mercy.

Caught up by the light yet arousing mood flowing between them, Elsa eventually relented, allowing her sister reprieve to end her respite. As she re-settled into place, retrieving her laptop from the depths of the blanket it was so carelessly buried in, she threatened "be careful, or you'll never find out what's in that mystery box."

Elsa felt kind of like a child who had just been told that they can't have ice cream. She narrowed her eyes "you drive a hard bargain, Freckles."

Flipping her hair pridefully, Anna quipped "only because you force my hand, dear Blondie."

A wildfire crackled across the elder's cheeks, leaving them scorched red. Her mind jumped from the mysterious box of Anna's to the ball the very next day, where it steadfastly halted. She had a dreadful realization. "I still don't know what I'm wearing tomorrow," she muttered to herself.

It was odd, how ringingly silent the room became when Anna stopped typing, and how long it took for Elsa to notice from behind the wall of haze that was her thoughts. She did, however, eventually snap out of it and meet the teasingly serious and almost palpable stare of teal eyes just inches from her own.

Elsa was sucked into the gaze. "W-what?"

"You still don't know what you're wearing?" An eyebrow raised.

Snatching her braid a little defensively, the elder looked away to alleviate the pressure encroaching on her chest. She knew Anna was joking, but she was still inexplicably embarrassed due to her wardrobe indecisiveness. "Well I just, I was- wanted to..."

"Wanted to..." The red head continued for her, leaving a pause suspended between them for a couple of seconds. "Make sure to look your best for me?" Elsa was busy blushing herself, but she swore she noticed the beginning of a ripe tomato blossoming on her sister's cheeks, just above her smile. Elsa noted a certain glitter in Anna's eye.

"Y-yes, that," Elsa responded with mawkish honesty.

This seemed to please Anna like a new treasure to a dragon. "Good," she squeaked, "because I'm gonna look my best for you, too."

Elsa just about died right then and there.

* * *

"Right," Anna said, abruptly shutting her computer as Elsa was drifting in and out of being half asleep later that afternoon.

After their little back and forth, Elsa decided to just lean back, relax, and let her mind run free like a dog with no leash for a time.

Apparently, Anna was done working now. "That's that, let's get ready for tomorrow!" She was standing upright so fast that Elsa didn't even see her moving.

Being dragged out of drowsiness by Anna was actually quite a quick and painless process, especially when she knew that she was about to be dressing up for Anna and, just as importantly, Anna would be dressing up for _her_. With butterflies in her stomach, Elsa yawned "I believe you're right."

The strawberry blonde was already prancing towards the door when she turned and said "of course I am" with a wink that melted Elsa before leaving and shutting the door behind herself.

Elsa walked in to her packed, glorious closet of options. Her mind raced and clawed for the perfect choice. She had to be bold, but not belie herself, she had to dress as if her and Anna were going on an _actual_ date, but not so overtly that it gave away her feelings. She needed to walk a fine tight rope, balancing between sisterly enough and pushing the boundaries.

Elsa wasn't crazy, she already new which dress she'd be wearing tomorrow, but she had to comfort her choice, as it were. She had to try more on, to prove that her new green dress was the right choice. _The crimson dress. I almost wore it the night I met Hans, on me and Anna's double date._ It was bold, it really made her stand out like fire in a snowstorm, and Elsa _loved_ the command it gave her. She sifted through her neatly stowed garments and pulled out the dark red outfit. She undressed and donned her new cloth, checking herself out in the mirror.

She definitely appreciated the aura of power it gave her, and that hint of ersatz sexual prowess it bestowed, and with some red lipstick and accenting makeup, Elsa knew she'd look stunning. She grinned for a moment, still examining her own curves and trying to decide how Anna would look at them. _If she even would look at them._ The sensual authority this dress veiled her with wasn't by any stretch of anyone's imagination real, Elsa decided.

 _I don't know how to be_ sexy _like that. I have to be myself tomorrow._ After all, she wanted to be able to relax and have fun on her special night with her sister. She affirmed that such a dress was _too_ sexy.

She wondered, for a little while, what Anna would be wearing, how she'd choose to present herself. How revealing would she be? What color? How form fitting would the dress be? Elsa's heart quickened in her chest. It felt like it was weak, just like her knees were becoming. Every image flashing through her mind made Anna even more sexualized. She wanted to let the thoughts sit for a little, but decided that before any of that, she needed to confirm her outfit.

She took off her crimson dress and perused her selections farther. _Sexy, but still me._ That's what she needed. There was a plain black dress with a slightly short skirt. _No, too simple._ She passed her vast selection of blue dresses. Her favorite color. Elsa had several very nice dresses in such a palate, ranging from cyan to dark, royal blue that was befitting for a queen. She reached out to one that had a skirt reaching just to the knees and a slightly open chest. One that accentuated her wide hips and very three dimensional bust loyally, but her hand curled away at the last second. _I always wear blue. Too normal. I want to do something different tomorrow._ Different _but me, for Anna._

"For Anna," Elsa repeated to herself. The corner of her lips turned up, a surefire grin to showcase how _right_ her original choice knew exactly where it was, and in no time, her hand was tracing a rich green skirt and a spirit green top trimmed regally. She recalled her Freudian slip as she was perched next to Anna on the couch while she bought this dress. _"I guess that I'm yours whenever I'm wearing it."_ She blushed for no one in particular. _It's the perfect time to break this dress in. After all, I'm all Anna's tomorrow._

Elsa grinned. _Well, I'm always Anna's._ She dressed herself up, shaking with excitement to see herself in the outfit. In no time, she was staring herself down in the mirror.

Green was a little unusual to see on herself. It looked great, Elsa thought, but it still took some getting used to. But it fit the occasion. She was just being herself, and she belonged to Anna by every stretch of the word, no matter how impossible them truly being together was. In her mind, she added stilettos to her feet, shiny green ones, and a spirit green bow in her hair. The accessories, albeit imaginary for the moment, made her look even _more_ like Anna owned every loving bone in Elsa's body.

The intense green trim on the bodice marked her curves tightly, thinning her waist and accentuating her bust. Her slender, pale, and ever so lightly freckled arms were completely exposed, as well as her shoulders and sternum. The natural pink hue of her cheeks and chest were exaggerated by the opposing green of her dress, bringing her skin a bounty of life.

And her breasts. They weren't completely hidden, but rather exposed some cleavage, enough that Elsa felt bold wearing the dress but comfortable enough to break it out, so long as no one but Anna saw her. Which they wouldn't.

She was happy with the dress, perfectly so. The way it popped the red on her lips and made her look like a _woman,_ not a girl. There was, however, one last detail to settle: her hair. The braid looked out of place with the getup, despite it being so familiar and comforting to her. Elsa bit her lip hard in thought. _Anna will be there, and only Anna,_ she reminded herself. Anxiety played a fiddle in the pit of her stomach. _She'll be there, so I should- I_ want _to step outside of my comfort zone._

Elsa closed her eyes and began unweaving her hair, a normal action for the evening, yet it felt so different now. _Perhaps because I'm not doing to it go to sleep, I'm doing it to present myself in an entirely new way._

She opened her eyes to see the errant mass of hair left behind and had a moment of amusement at how out of place her dress looked with such ridiculous hair. Then, she got hard at work brushing her long, blonde locks.

Opening her eyes once again as she finished grooming the last of her mane, she met her own eyes in the mirror. Her hair was down, straight but with plenty of volume, smooth and shining. She was stricken by how incredible of a resemblance she bore to Anna in that moment, with that light. The only differences were the obvious hair color discrepancy, the less prominent freckles, and the subtle height change.

That made it easy to pretend she was looking right into the eyes of her Anna, especially given the green dress. And just like earlier, she got lost in Anna's facsimile. She was no longer staring at herself, but longing at her sister. Her heart worked harder and her lungs dried her mouth.

And Elsa got drawn in by the tractor beam of affection. She took a deep breath and anchored her gaze on pink lips. Her breath drew in tightly, her chest clamming up as she thought about leaning in. She could just close her eyes, pucker her lips, and steal Anna's right then and there.

Elsa's eyes began to flutter, her vision blurring more and her willpower dwindling like a stream in a drought. The drum-like pounding of her heart thudded in her temples and chest, her lips filled with hot blood and her ears blanked out all auditory stimulation.

Cold of the mirror surprised her a little, but she hadn't lost complete touch with reality. Her eyes popped open, only to meet their own reflections from millimeters away. Crimson filed into her cheeks when she realized that she had just _kissed_ the _mirror_ , pretending it was her own sister. She cleared her throat like an orator with stage fright. "Don't do that tomorrow," she mumbled to herself in scold and wiped a mark of red lipstick off the mirror.

 _I'll have to control myself carefully._ Not that anything was new, really, she just now realized how much she'd have to remind herself to be a _sister,_ not a lover. _Anyway,_ she mentally changed her own subject, shifting her train of though to a new set of rails, if only to avoid crashing headlong into embarrassment, _it's just about time to get ready for bed._

Elsa stripped herself of her dress, smiling as she thought about how she'd wear it the next day. She tossed her underwear into the hamper and wrapped her naked body in a towel. She practically skipped towards her door, sleeping would be difficult that night. She plunged into the hallway and noticed as she arrived at the bathroom that the light was on. She listened and realized that the water was running. _Anna's showering._ That was a good thought, Elsa shivered at its implications. She was about to turn away and wait in her room...

 _But, no, I couldn't have just heard that._ But maybe she did, right? Elsa narrowed her eyes in focus, honing in her ears like a cat's. Just the constant stream of water from the shower head. She kept listening, though, harder, crouching by the door. "Ah-ah-" came Anna's soft moaning from within.

Elsa's eyes popped right out of her skull like balloons. Her skin flushed with rapidly moving stripes of flame and ice, clenching her core and spitting a furious salamander's primal breath into her center. _Anna's masturbating in the shower._ The truth of the thought, along with the images it produced with the efficiency of an industrial printer, was almost harrowing. Her breathing all but stopped and her knees forsook her. "Agh," she whispered to herself, practically soaking her towel. Elsa had to sit there for a few minutes to gain an inkling of control over her disheveling arousal.

A short time later, she slowly stood, fully intending to lock herself away in her room for a bit of alone time to take care of what, at this point, could no longer be described as a desire, but a _need._

**Click**

Elsa's eyes bolstered their size for the third time that day.

"Elsa!" came the shriek from behind her, causing the elder to squeal in surprise. "Hi- you- here- uh, what are you uh, you doing outside the bathroom?"

"I um- I j-just- I was going to shower, but- but uh, you were in it, so..." With a blush so intense that it lit up the walls around her red, the platinum blonde faced her sister.

Anna was very red. Like super red, at _least_ as red as her sister. _I would be too if Anna was standing right here after... that!_ "So you, so you uh-" Anna tucked some hair behind her ear. She was in just a towel. The same as Elsa, so _exposed._ "-just got here?"

With a mighty gulp, Elsa lied. "Y-yeah."

This seemed to relax the younger sibling a great deal. She exhaled quite loudly and said "oh good- er- I mean, not _good,_ but okay, I'm glad you weren't there long- n-not 'cause I was doing anything! I just, it'd be weird if you waited _right_ outside the door, right? Eh-heh." She started rubbing the back of her neck, her face stuck in a sort of perpetual wince. With her free hand, Anna held her towel in place.

A baby of a giggle escape Elsa's mouth, despite the incredibly awkward tension between the two. "Yes, I- I suppose that would be bizarre." _That's exactly what I just did._

Anna provided a rather uncomfortable little smile and began walking away. She turned with that same little smile, but it looked a little more right this time. "I'll uh- see you for bed!"

With what little strength she had, Elsa waved and muttered "okay." Her mind was still on what she just heard from the shower, and Anna walking away. She had _plenty_ of time to shower now, and even though her knees were still weak and shaking from the encounter, she hungrily turned towards the bathroom door and went in.

By the time she was done panting in the shower, the adrenaline from earlier had worn off, for Anna, too. They were crawling into bed. It was warm and relaxed, and Elsa was sinking slowly for one reason: the ball the next day. Sleep was far off, but tranquility seemed just around the corner. She happily sighed, idly scratching her back of her sister while a foreign hand rested on her stomach, teasing her abdomen with its nails. She saw nothing but the darkness of her eye lids. Anna's head bore down upon her chest with moderate weight, the familiar tickle of her hair comforting her cheek. The smell of lilac filtered into her nose from her sister's silky hair, and the mint of her freshly brushed teeth cooled her mouth.

_Tomorrow is our date._


	19. The Ball

Elsa woke up quite quickly, yet it seemed to go by smoothly. Excitement ensured that, turning the process of removing herself from the clutches of sleep, usually a drawn out, into a rapid leap headlong into the arms of wakefulness.

She looked over at Anna and already began daydreaming about later that day. Anna would be dressed up, they'd dance, and it was going to be perfect. Elsa wondered if she should cook a special dinner for them. _I'll ask Anna when she wakes up._ Until then, Elsa decided that, since it was a weekend after all, she'd just enjoy the slumbering company she had.

The box came to mind. The secret within, what Anna was hiding. Elsa was fairly certain that it was a dress, but what if it was something else? She told herself a million times that it was nothing insane, but she couldn't help but imagine her Anna pulling out various, rather revealing sets of lingerie. Elsa bit her lip as she imagined Anna in a sheer set, the garments just barely concealing everything that her younger sister has to offer. She began breathing heavily. _Stop, not now, not now._

 _This is just going to be a happy day for both of us, don't ruin it for Anna by fantasizing too much. Be a sister._ Elsa closed her eyes and breathed deeply to mentally prepare herself for such a difficult task. _Don't upset Anna._ _That's silly, I never upset Anna!_ Elsa furrowed her brows in a moment of doubt. _Do I?_ She thought about the dejected mood that her sister used to slip into here and there. _No, we resolved that, stop._ Elsa eventually convinced herself that she was just over thinking things, but also came to a sort of agreement with herself, that she'd be extra caring to make it a perfect day. Once she realized that, it was simpler to relax and enjoy the predictable rise and fall of Anna's breath. It was hypnotizing.

* * *

Eventually, Anna did wake up, but only after Elsa bravely planted a kiss on her cheek. After their usual morning greeting and hygienic process, they went downstairs for breakfast. They giggled and talked like normal, and Elsa felt the pressure in her chest build in preparation. Once there was a moment of silence after their meal, she took her opportunity.

"Should I make us something special for dinner tonight?" Her voice wavered at the end. It felt more like something to ask if they were _actually_ going on a date. _God_ she loved that feeling, despite how incredibly intimidating it was.

Anna seemed to blush a little, and gave a slightly shy smile back. Quite uncharacteristic of her to be shy, Elsa mused. "I thought I'd try my hand at cooking for us again."

Elsa couldn't help a quick chuckle. She raised an eyebrow and opened her mouth to speak, only to be cut off swiftly by her flamboyant sister, who pointed a spoon at her almost as if to threaten.

"Don't say it," she demanded, audibly trying to keep a straight face. "I know what happened last time, but I've learned from my mistake, err, I think, but I'm gonna do it!"

Laughing a little more but covering with her hand, Elsa replied "I'm sure you can."

Anna reveled in her minor victory for a moment by sitting back in her seat. It felt nice, Elsa decided, knowing that Anna wanted to cater the night in such a way. Sure, the elder loved cooking and enjoyed it even more so when she was preparing a dish for her sister, but she could look passed that. Her heart felt fluffy.

They put their dishes away and goofed off downstairs until the early afternoon. With the dance hanging over her head, it was hard for Elsa to focus on anything, but she managed sometimes.

"Now," the younger girl said to end one of their silly exchanges of wit, "let's get you upstairs."

Elsa's eyes widened. _You mean get me into bed? You can do that._ Her initial thought aside, she was baffled trying to figure out what Anna wanted. "Wha-huh-why?"

"Because," Anna smirked with a ripe blush, "I need to start decorating the house for your ball."

"Don't you mean 'we'?"

Elsa noticed pearly white teeth nibble on a pink, smooth lower lip. "No, I mean me. _You_ are gonna go do what pretty blondes do upstairs while I make sure that everything down here is _perfect_." She punctuated herself by pressing a finger to Elsa's sternum and pressed in such that the elder had to take one step back (and consequently towards the staircase) to avoid kilter.

Her mouth hung open for a moment before she said "Wh- up stairs? So you don't want help decorating?" The inquiry came out a little more desperate sounding than Elsa wanted it to.

A roll of teal eyes with a flippant smile. "No, silly, of course I want you to decorate, but I want it to be a surprise _more."_

Elsa's heart skipped a beat. Anna was putting a lot of blatant effort into this night and it made Elsa feel special. So, incredibly, wonderfully, and mind-numbingly special. She smiled and blushed, the heated honey she'd become so familiar with as of late dripping down around he heart and stomach. "You're perfect," she let slide. It came out a little flippantly, which Elsa was quite relieved about, as she imagined the tone saved her from a very awkward moment.

Instead, Anna's nose scrunched up. Elsa's heart actually _hurt_ at how adorable that was. "Well duh, I already know that, silly goose."

With a giggle and a skeptically raised eyebrow, the elder sibling retorted "okay now you're just being a little full of yourself."

Anna nodded contently. "When am I not full of myself?"

Elsa rolled her eyes and grinned. "You dork."

"A proud one, too." Then, Blondie found herself being gently pushed backwards by hands on either of her collar bones. "Now, my favorite sister in the whole wide world, get upstairs."

Elsa went willingly, somewhat. "But what am I supposed to do?" When she made close contact with beautiful teal, she realized _exactly_ what she could do alone stuck in her room all afternoon. She blinked a few times, as if it'd stop Anna from being able to look through her eyes into her mind.

But then Anna shrugged. "I dunno, try on dresses, watch a movie, read a book, make yourself even prettier, anything that makes you not down here."

Elsa pursed her lips before she turned to climb the flight. "As you wish, your highness."

Anna seemed pleased with this. "I'll call you when I'm ready."

* * *

It had been _hours._ Elsa was getting antsy, her excitement was bottling up like fizz in a bottle, destined to explode. And she was feeling it. She'd open her computer, flip it shut, check her phone, and have a brief staring contest with the door, all while her knee bounced up and down impatiently.

That's not to say she didn't jump out of her skin when there was a knock at the door, because she did. "Elsa! Time to get ready, but _don't_ you _dare_ go downstairs before I say!"

Elsa chuckled. Anna sounded quite serious, in the most playful way. "Okay, _Princess_ Anna."

Both went to their private respective closets, Anna in her own room. At least, that's what Elsa assumed as she stepped into her own closet to dress up. Her heart skipped a beat. _Anna's dressing up for me._ She shivered while she slipped into the green dress she had tried on the previous evening. She mused on exactly how she would behave that evening. She was mentally preparing to skirt a thin line between date and sister. She was ecstatic to look her prettiest for Anna.

Checking the mirror, Elsa put her hair down, just like before; and just like last time, it was slightly nerve-rattling. She met her own blue eyes, standing against the green reflection, but this time _didn't_ kiss it. No, this time, it was time to perfect her presentation.

She rooted through shoes for the emerald green stilettos that she _knew_ Anna owned. She then plucked a shiny green ribbon- again from Anna's things- and tied it in her hair such that it held the top layer back, while the remainder of her curvy hair cascaded down her shoulders like a moonlit waterfall. She applied cherry red lipstick and even deepened her eyeshadow a slight amount.

And the ribbon tied it all together. It perked up the red in her cheeks and lips even more, falling gently down with her hair and shimmering in the light. Elsa took a deep, rather shaky breath. She hadn't even realized how nervous she _truly_ was until that instant. Her hands were shaking and slightly clammy, and her knees were wobbling. Her chest was burning off. She closed her eyes for a moment of concentrated silence before she went down to see the big reveal awaiting her, before she saw how Anna was dressed. _Remember, sisters, it's going to be-_

"Elsaaa!" Came a shrill sounding yet excited scream from downstairs. It was distinctly un-lady like, only Anna could produce such a sound and still make it music to the elder's ears. "You can come down now!"

Elsa took a sharp inhale in and looked at herself one more time in the mirror. _You're gonna do great,_ she told herself as if she was a teenager preparing for prom. In a way, this was her prom, so it at least was fitting. _With Anna._ Elsa's heart skipped like an old record. She made her way to the stairs, all the while wondering what sort of decorations Anna put in the room and on herself.

The first thing that Elsa noticed was that the downstairs area was quite dim, at least from the staircase she was descending. As she arrived downstairs she looked around in wonderment at the sparkling lights and decorations, and as she scoured, she heard her Anna humming from another room. Tinsel wove around shelves and furniture, shining by the soft glow of zigzagged, wound, and drooping Christmas lights. Fake holly was stashed wherever it could fit, on book shelves, the television stand, the counters, and more. The coffee table had been overrun by candles of Christmas red and green, which were standing in a sea of holly. Elsa admired more candles on the counters in the kitchen, along with a small fake Christmas tree with cute miniature globe ornaments on a kitchen table. She spied Anna's laptop and some speakers hooked up on a shelf, partially camouflaged by holly and tinsel, like a soldier awaiting his opportunity.

Christmas nick-knacks of snowman and caroling choirs danced about the tabletops and counters, playing merrily by the TV. The only available light was that heavy, flickering light of the candles and the colored and thick light of the Christmas lights sprawled about everywhere. The air was warm with the burning of candles, making it feel heavy in Elsa's lungs, just as she hoped it would that evening.

She looked around in awe, mouth slightly ajar, admiring the incredible attention to detail. No wonder this took Anna all afternoon, everything was perfectly in its place, each little piece helping to balance the whole scene. It had been so long since Elsa saw Christmas decorations that she'd almost forgotten that they had any at all. Anna must have dug them up like a hound and brushed the dust off of everything.

It was just like.. before Elsa's crash. The family never went _too_ overboard for Christmas, but Anna had used _all_ of the decorations. Elsa's heart suddenly ached for those days of the past, for family Christmases with their mother, to go _out_ shopping for her dear Anna. She didn't realize how intensely she missed all that.

And Anna was bringing it back into her life. Elsa took a shaky breath and batted a tear from her eye, it burned mildly as the salty drop slid away. Good _Lord_ , Anna could not _fathom_ how much she was loved right then and there. Elsa's heart was almost violently overflowing, pressurized and ready to burst. There was just one last thing to see: Anna. If she put this much effort into their surroundings, Elsa _had_ to see how her sister dressed _now._

"Do you like it?"

The timing was almost poetic. Elsa turned around to see her beloved standing in the middle of it all, within all the organized chaos of decoration stood the prettiest piece.

Elsa opened her mouth to say something, but when she got a look at Anna she became speechless, mouth agape. Anna stood with dilated pupils in the dim light, staring right back at Elsa. She wore a dress of blue, very similar to the dress that Elsa had on, with a royal blue skirt, and a sky blue top trimmed with the same regal shade of the bottom. It twinkled with the colored lights and thickly yellow candle light.

Anna's normally teal eyes looked dark blue in the light and with her gown, her strawberry blonde hair was let down, waving and resting with gentle volume on her exposed shoulders. She wore pink lipstick, which Elsa found worked well with the dress, as both colors were a little muted and complemented each other. Although she took great care in applying eyeliner and sparing eyeshadow, the younger girl must have known that Elsa liked her freckles, because she hadn't masked them with any makeup. They were there on her cheeks, on her shoulders, on her chest, and everywhere else.

But the trail of sunspots that led Elsa to her sister's chest nearly burst her eyes right out of her skull. The dress had no shoulder straps and hung low, pushing up Anna's breasts, making them look even fuller than they actually were. _Especially_ with the contouring of the light heavily shadowing Anna's freckled cleavage. That's when the elder realized that the stark lighting probably made her own cleavage stand out quite a lot, and she could _feel_ Anna's eyes roaming her. Elsa was short on breath. Her stomach buzzed with activity as she kept examining her sibling.

The gown was tight on Anna's hips, making them flare out, hugging her tight stomach and sides. And there, Elsa noticed, was a second difference between their two dresses. While Anna's was still only knee length, it had a slit on the right side that came up a little over halfway on the side of the younger girl's thigh. Elsa could see a peak of toned, smooth skin under the light. She traced her sister's luscious calves down to see, to Elsa's delight, sapphire blue high heels. She had a single moment of concern, given her sister's historic relationship with clumsiness, but decided that they looked too good on Anna to be a bad choice.

With a heart beating a mile a minute and a stomach churning with butterflies, she finally looked back up at her sister's eyes, which were looking down to Elsa's feet for a few more moments. She could see the teeth resting on Anna's lower lip, see the awe in her eyes, and it drove Elsa wild.

But then their eyes met. Elsa took a deep breath.

"Elsa, you're amazing..." The elder was speechless, so she had to endure the moment of silent anticipation as she watched her sister's mouth move up and down a few times. "Wow," came the eventual whisper, clearly not exactly meant for Elsa to hear, just Anna collecting her thoughts.

 _Anna's speechless._ The room seemed quite hot, and Elsa would have liked to blame it on the candles, but she knew her own reddened cheeks were just as guilty. Elsa tried to talk but her jittery cheerfulness caused her words to elude her for a stretch of time that just seemed to drag on and on. "I- you- just- Anna you- you look breathtaking- and- and this-" she held her arms out, gesturing to their surroundings, "all this is amazing."

The younger sibling grinned shyly and nervously tucked a hair that was _actually_ a little out of place behind her ear, blushing at the ground. "Thanks, Elsa. I wanted to- er- you know, make up for all the years we've missed being a family." Her voice wavered at the end, and Elsa's heart bled for her sister, but also for years passed and moments they'd missed with family.

She sniffled and wiped off eyes that were simmering in tears. "You were there, th-that was enough."

This seemed to make Anna dwell more on the passed, and although she smiled affectionately at her sister, a piece of her remained as if it was in mourning of a loss. Elsa could see it right through Anna's eyes, the sadness. She wanted to fix it and her mind worked double overtime to think of something. "You look beautiful," she blurted out. And she wasn't at all embarrassed.

The compliment washed away that dark shadow in Anna's eyes like a flood ferrying away debris. "Thank you." Anna was chewing on her lower lip quite viciously. "You look stunning, Elsa."

Pale cheeks lit up like Christmas lights but burning _much_ more heat off into the atmosphere. Her stomach vibrated. "Thank you. I- you're wearing blue."

Anna chuckled. "Blue, yes, very good, Elsa."

Elsa blushed vividly. She felt like a bumbling fool. "My color."

Now it was the younger sibling's turn to turn bright red. She bit her lip and looked Elsa in the eye. It made a loving heart skip a beat and her stomach feel like it had bumblebees prancing clumsily around inside. "Oh yes, and you're wearing my color. Looks like you're mine and I'm- I'm y-yours." Anna hesitated for a moment. "For-for tonight, huh?"

That made the elder's heart explode into an army of warm, mushy pieces and made her face so hot that she swore the room started doing laps around her. "Of-of course." Tonight _was_ a dream come true.

They just smiled at each other for a moment, until Anna abruptly stated "I think it's time for some music."

She tried to elegantly stomp over to open her laptop and pressed a button as Elsa just fumbled in place for a second. Music meant dancing, Anna wanting the music on now meant that she wanted to _dance_ with Elsa now. Elsa sucked in unsatisfying breaths trying to steady her nerves so she wouldn't be vibrating during their dance. It was finally happening and she felt like she was on a collision course with a train.

Slow music started playing. The first thing that Elsa noticed about it was that it was soothing and the beat was a six-count. She listened to the relaxing instrumental, learning the beat so she could dance to it, and trying to dissect Anna's choice of music. _Everything_ else had been meticulously and purposefully placed, so the music was chosen intently. Elsa wanted to figure out her sister's reasoning for her music choice, so she listened.

The vocals entered, and the elder was a little surprised to hear a foreign language being sung. She was by no means a linguistic wizard, but she did her best to surmise the language being spoken. It sounded... French. _Anna chose French music. Slow, French music._ French was nice sounding, but first and foremost it was a romance language. Elsa gulped. _She's_ _strictly_ _your sister, not a date, don't do anything stupid._ She looked at Anna.

The younger was looking back expectantly, still standing by the computer, but with rosy red cheeks. Elsa gulped and smiled, already reprimanding herself for _thinking_ about crossing their sisterly boundaries, but nonetheless opened her arms to her sister.

Anna took this as an invitation and began walking forward. Elsa mentally prepared to dance so that she wouldn't swoon. _That_ would be embarrassing. Just then, however, Anna lost her footing in her stilettos and squeaked as she toppled forward like a Jenga tower.

Elsa's eyes bulged and she reflexively reach out to catch her sister, the moment in time seeming to slow down at the red head flared her arms and legs in a vein attempt to regain her balance. She ended up falling face first into Elsa's arms, her face landing exactly on Elsa's chest, mouth still agape in start.

Being conscious of where her sibling's head was was almost painful. Elsa could feel the slightly cool button nose of Anna's between her cleavage, and swore she felt the faintest hint of teeth scraping against her nipple as the two righted themselves. She held to Anna's shoulders, because fainting was a very real possibility at that point. Heat flared in her core like gasoline had been squirted onto a pile of burning embers.

"Sorry, sorry, I uh, sorry Elsa, I didn't- I just tripped and I fell on your- on your um, your b-br- err, I'm sorry." Elsa felt boiled alive in the thick and now searing atmosphere. Anna's skin had lost all traces of color except for red.

"It- it's uh- it's o-okay."

Anna giggled nervously, pushing some hair behind her ear. "Maybe um, maybe high heels aren't the best choice, huh?"

The younger's comment got a rigid chuckle from the elder. "Well you do look ravishing in them, but um, but I suppose not." Both girls looked at each other for a moment, still standing practically touching one another and latched to each other's arms in an attempt to make sure one didn't fall again. After a second of silence allowed the situation to fully sink in and the awkwardness to begin leaking out, they both burst into laughter and slipped out of their shoes.

"You klutz," Elsa giggled.

Anna smirked and stifled a guffaw. "Watch it, you, or I might fall over during our dance."

"Well then, I'll just have to catch you again."

"Then maybe I will fall." The tone was still light-hearted, but the red head's face became a little bit more serious, and Elsa couldn't help but think her sister looked a little bit like a child wishing on a star. There was the same, deep look in the eyes, a similar but subtle raising of the eyebrows. She didn't know what to make of it, so she smiled at her sister.

The song changed just then, just as romantic as the first, and just as French. It seemed to snap Anna out of her own mind. She smiled brightly at Elsa. Anna cleared her throat and stepped into position. Elsa gulped. This was actually it, provided there were no more catastrophic mishaps like during the previous song. Her heart dripped with warm, shiny honey all over her stomach, which still felt like and active jackhammer. They looked in to each other's eyes. "Shall we?"

Elsa nodded rapidly in agreement with her sister. "Y-yes, we shall." Both girls reached their arms out in an attempt to take the female role in the dance: one arm out and the other planted softly but surely on a shoulder.

"Uh, um, let's..." Anna began but never finished. She was blushing hard.

When they realized that they both took the follow, they awkwardly giggled. "Okay, switch," Elsa muttered as they yanked their hands back and each tried to take the lead position again, simultaneously.

Elsa was trying to hold a somewhat straight face but simply couldn't, laughs were escaping like steam through a broken gasket, and Anna just burst into a fit of giggles. She stood up straight after a moment, nodded to get herself in check, and finally took control of the situation. "Right, you put your hand on my hip, I'll lead."

Elsa shuddered. She would _gladly_ put her hand there. "O-okay yeah." She did as she was told. Her hand felt hot against the tight contour of Anna's dress, resting right on the hip bone that made such a good handle. The silky softness of her younger sister's dress slid tantalizingly upon Elsa's fingers. Her mouth went a little bit dry as she thought about how close her digits were to this beautiful, thoughtful girl's backside.

Anna began leading a slow dance, stepping in time with the music, guiding Elsa in a gentle square. Simple steps, but enough, enough to get the younger's hips swaying, that's for sure. The elder followed along just fine, she wasn't very practiced, but she knew the basic steps. She began to feel warm and needy as the sensation of her sisters rather full and swaying hips tickled at her hand. Her breathing became shallow. _Relax, enjoy the time. Don't be so tense._ She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Her head came to rest on well-groomed copper hair.

The music came in to focus, and even though her tactile play with Anna was still building in its opening act, she was able to focus on meeting the rhythm of the music with her motions, and Anna's dancing hips rocking Elsa to sleep like soft waves at sea.

A draft of cool air on her head caused Elsa opened her eyes. It must have been Anna lifting her head, because she was staring back with a warm smile on her face that almost melted Elsa's heart. The sisters were moving fluidly, their bosoms almost touching, and the music smoothing out the atmosphere. It felt incredibly intimate to Elsa. _Especially_ when the third song began and they just naturally scooted closer. Elsa now, however, began stroking and playing with Anna's hair, enjoying it's soft nature and scratching lightly with her other hand on a thin waist.

Anna returned the favor, giving Elsa goosebumps all up and down her chest and arms.

Now, she could feel her sister's petite breasts brushing up against her own, their stomachs would touch one another if the dance steps were slightly out of sync. Elsa tried to stop the fire on her chest from reaching between her legs, but it did anyway. No matter how much proverbial water she threw on it, it just grew and grew every time her sister's chest touched her own. It send lightning-like shivers down her spine.

They remained dancing like this for some time, making little comments and conversation here and there, placing shy little kisses on one another's cheeks, and once rubbing their freckled, button noses together. Anna would hum to the songs or just purr like a cat every now and again, and Elsa thought it was absolutely adorable. This was a wonderful evening.

As the night wore on, they were both become more tired and more lazy with their dancing. By now, they were mostly just swaying back and forth in each other's arms. Anna had given up supporting all of her own weight and was leaning completely in to Elsa, her hair of strawberry perched atop the elder's collar bone.

Anna now had one arm wrapped around Elsa's back, who was returning the favor with both arms to hold closer. Every now and then, she's lightly massage her sibling's back, rousing a pleasant but silent rebuttal. Anna's free arm was resting around her sister's neck, and would scratch lightly around the area, down to just below Elsa's collar bone.

Every single time the younger girl did such a thing, goosebumps would erupt like a million active volcanoes all over Elsa's body, making her breath shudder and her reflexively press inward to their embrace. She had practically forgotten about her rule: _act like a sister, not a lover._

"You're a very tactile person," Anna quietly commented as she ran her nails along the top of her sister's sternum.

It took a while, but Elsa eventually properly processed what she had just heard, while still steaming from the touch. That was _weird_ for a sister to say, right? It had to be, it was just came from so far out of the blue, it was like a sucker punch to the jaw. She caught her breath as if recovering from such a blow. "I- I what?" She was less perplexed than just trying to keep her heart beating. She already knew that she was sensitive to touch, after all.

It's just that Anna had noticed that. Elsa was overheating.

The younger sibling withdrew her hand from a porcelain collar bone and chewed her lip, blushing as she tried to explain herself. "It's just that you- you get goosebumps whenever I touch you and- you- and you just seem to uh- l-like it when- I mean you react really strongly to it but- but- it's cute! Like not cute cute, but cute, just... cute."

Elsa was floating in limbo between giggling, swooning, and adoration and it was _exhausting._ She saw stars. "Oh I um-"

"-I'm sorry, Elsa, that was- that was weird." Anna looked like a little innocent puppy waiting to be yelled at.

The fear of repercussions in the younger girl's eyes was crystal clear. Elsa just wanted to make it go away. She knew exactly how her sister felt in that moment, or close at least, because she had said really bizarre things to Anna several times before, and in those moments just hoped with all her mite that she wasn't about to lose such a wonderful sister. Except, for Elsa, there was the not so little wrinkle that she was in _love_ with her sister.

"N-no it's- it's okay. You're um, you're right, I- I do like it."

While Elsa's heart may have been pounding like a war drum in her ears and her stomach alight with angry little bees buzzing and stinging everywhere, Anna looked somewhat relieved."Oh okay, good!" She smiled at Elsa. "I like making you happy."

Elsa blushed. "I l-like making you happy, t-too." There was a short pause as they just looked at each other, and for some reason, the elder felt the need to fill it. Like it was a pothole she'd drive right into otherwise. "I'll always be there to make you happy."

At first, Anna's face brightened up and her spine stood on end. She overtly loved what her sister had said, and it made Elsa feel all tingly inside. But then, as Anna insisted "you're perfect, Elsa," she let her shoulders slump a little and her eyes drop.

Anna disappeared into her own world for a moment, there were clearly hundreds of thoughts flying around in that precious head, and Elsa wished she knew what they were. _Then I- I could help with whatever she's thinking about. It's clearly upsetting her._ The red head's brows were loose over her eyes, which were looking wishfully off to the side. Elsa pursed her lips. "Anna," she softly called.

Teal eyes blinked as fast as a hummingbird flaps its wings. The former dejectedness was usurped by surprise. "Yes, hello, that's me."

Elsa giggled, covering it up with her mouth. "Are you okay?"

Anna grinned and tilted her head to the side as she moved a stray clump of hair to behind her ear. She didn't look or sound entirely convincing. "Of course! How could I not be, tonight's been wonderful."

"Any night with you is wonderful" slipped out of Elsa's mouth like soap through her hands in a shower.

Almost like a child on Christmas morning, the younger girl's eyes and face lit up, color still inundating and bringing extra character to her face. And for the first time, Elsa didn't panic because of her little slip of the tongue, mostly because Anna's positive reaction was so rapid. "Oh, Elsa."

As the elder raised her brow, Anna chewed her lip. She wanted to say something, and as per usual, nervousness invaded Elsa's stomach like a colony of wasps hellbent on stinging the organ to death. She took a deep breath in preparation, something she noticed her sister also doing.

Anna continued. "I want to- um, I think- I want to say- ugh, that um," There was a momentary pause. The inflated confidence laced around Anna's body seemed to spring a leak and become limp. She appeared to change the track of her train of thought quickly. "Every night with you is wonderful, too."

Elsa couldn't help but wonder if there was something else that her sister desired to tell her but couldn't for some reason. In any case, she felt warm honey trickle over her heart and sooth her stomach. She smiled. "Thank you, Freckles."

"Now," the exuberant girl began excitedly, "let's get back to dancing!"

They did, and they held each other a little more like Elsa presumed dancing lovers would.

* * *

The night wore on and brought drowsiness along for the ride. The two had been dancing and giggling for hours, and they knew their father wouldn't be home until after midnight, giving them plenty of time to get lost in each other. It was now dark outside, which made the dim and heavy lighting all the more romantic and thick. Enough light for Elsa to see her surroundings, but little enough to easily let her eyes shut and to bring about heavy, flickering shadows on everything.

The candles were melting, the air smelled of holly and cinnamon, the latter most likely from the various scented candles, and Elsa was warm in the arms of her sister.

Anna was once more leaning almost completely on her elder's chest, letting her eyes flutter open and shut as they wished. The two were again just swaying, like they were cradling a baby. It was cozy and comfortable and Elsa didn't want it to end.

It was romantic, and exactly how Elsa imagined a perfect night going, her _date_ even leaning right up against her and, along with a small, toasty fire, keeping them both warm against the crisp, dry December air surrounding their house.

So incredible, so enrapturing, and Elsa's heart was dripping with the glorious rush of love as she peered at her dear Anna. Her one true love, she decided, the only one who ever would or had ever held half her key to happiness. With Anna, maybe she didn't _need_ the other half: usurping her phobia. The only one that had owned her heart entirely, the only one she'd ever belong to. No matter what happened, even if they got separated, Elsa would always long for her Anna.

But here they were, dancing alone in the heavy, romancing light with the soft, loving music to please their ears. Elsa's heart swelled and nearly burst from her ribcage. This _had_ to be a date. She let out a shaken, excited, and relaxed breath all in once and grinned with pure joy from ear to ear, which caused Anna to smile wide, too.

"I love you, Anna," She simply said it because it was the closest she knew she could get to admitting her feelings without _actually_ giving her secret away, and she _had_ to let out some of the overbearing pressure of adoration that was building up within her heart.

This looked like it illuminated her darling Anna up. A head full of strawberry hair lifted from a pale chest so that teal eyes could meet deeply with blue ones. Elsa admired the breath of life she had managed to distill into her sister with four sweet words. "I love you too, Blondie."

The elder paused for a moment to let the last couple of seconds sink in like a panacea. She felt invincible when she heard those few simple words from her sister. She felt like she could _have_ happiness, like she was able to unlock the door and take it. She stared into her sister's eyes.

A sea of beauty, an ocean of caring, and a river of love. The doorway to the soul of the girl she loved, beauty and selflessness combined at their peak. That's what Elsa saw: her Anna. She got lost in the sight, in the feeling, in the immeasurable compassion and the drowning love. Her eyes flickered and her mind went blank of everything except what she felt for her sister, her date, her love.

Elsa leaned in. She felt a blast of heat more powerful than a shotgun erupt into her body the very instant that her lips met her sister's. She felt the smoothness that she had only ever dreamed about up against her own lips, sending a fire and lightning so powerful down her spine that it vaporized her desire to feel anything else.

 _God_ it was like magic in her mouth, the feeling of her sister's breath and supple lips, the intimate expression between the two, the-

 _No!_ _Please God, no_ _! What have I done!?_ Elsa's eyes popped wide open when she caught herself _kissing_ her sister! _I did exactly what I told myself over and over_ not _to do!_ She yanked away and her mind was burning red with panic! Her vision was slipping right and lift, up and down, spotted with stars, she was hyperventilating! Her chest felt clamped and tight, her mind was wiped of anything but the desire to disappear and perish in her panic attack.

Embarrassment didn't even begin to scratch the surface of what she was feeling, panic attack didn't do any justice to the frantic state she was lost in. Suddenly, all the lights around her were much too bright to look at, being blurred with streamlined tears from her eyes. Elsa accidentally glanced at her sister, who was standing still with her eyes widened. She looked stunned.

Elsa's heart beat. She could _feel_ Anna's brain racking to understand _why._

And another thud cut her mind in half. She saw a vision in her mind of Anna being disgusted, realizing everything.

***Bang***

Her heart felt like a cannon. Now, between her frantic pounding heart, she saw everything changing in Anna's mind, how she's look on their past relationship so differently.

Elsa had ruined it all. She couldn't take it back, one momentary lapse in self control cost her what she considered her _entire_ life. _I can't fix this._

So she ran. Away, directly away from Anna. As far as she could from her sister, to protect her from her blunder, from the murder of her hopes and dreams, from herself. She sprinted, bursting through barriers and nearly toppling over. Elsa felt like throwing up.

She kept going and going, that is, until an intensely balmy body circumscribed her own. Elsa fought, struggled, and clawed like a caged animal to get away, crying, sniffling, and howling all the while. She dug her nails into flesh to push away and screamed nothing in particular.

"Elsa!" A yelling voice right next to her ear called out, giving her a slight case of tinnitus. "Elsa!" She knew who it was immediately, and that made her fight harder to get away. "Elsa! Stop! Calm down!"

Elsa did not head the words.

"Elsa!" Anna screamed again, "Look!"

But she wouldn't hear it, she kept crying, spending that last dwindling candle of fight still burning inside of her body. "Let me go!" she whined out.

When the next call came, it snuffed her fire of determination in the platinum blonde's body and left her in a cold, glassy feeling of resignation. She gave up and let the arms keep her. "I'm s-sorry" she yelled, "I'm s-so sorry, I w-want to take it b-b-back, I-I'm s-sorry, Anna!" Elsa kept begging for forgiveness, still not opening her eyes enough to look at the one holding her.

"Elsa, looked at me!" Hands were squishing very pale cheeks and now violently shaking her by the shoulders in an effort to tilt Elsa's attention, but she wouldn't open her eyes. "Elsa!"

"Please d-don't hate m-me."

"Elsa, please!" A gentle, circular caress on her cheek now, soothing amongst the panic, order inside the chaos. Anna's voice was softer, but still urgent. "Look!"

It was almost like Elsa had no _choice_ but to obey her command, the person giving had too much power over her, because she stole a glimpse as she swept some tears from her eyes. It was _unfair._ She needed to mourn the loss of the one person she'd ever loved.

She saw Anna's eyes looking at her sternly, shooting icicle like fear right into the core of Elsa's being. She saw a puff of steamed breath in the crisp air, and the _second_ she made eye contact, Anna was speaking again, forcibly turning her elder around. "Look! You're outside!"

The gears switched so fast that Elsa's mind froze like an old computer while trying to keep up. Eventually, the processing finished and she glanced around. _What?_

"Elsa, you're outside! Like completely outside! Out front!" Anna sounded excited. There wasn't a lick of anger, no hint of hate or agitation, nothing like fear, no disdain, just... excitement.

And because of the pure, aboveboard tone of her little sister's voice, Elsa was able to take a moment to look around, her mouth hanging open in disbelief.

She saw their house. The front of it. A view she hadn't seen in five _years._ She blinked as if she was trying to wake up from a dream. She felt the crisp, cold air on her skin, the goosebumps prickling up to keep her warm. She smelled the soothing, exciting, and now unfamiliar scent of fresh air in her nose, seemingly cleansing her body like a sip of herbal tea. She could taste the frosted atmosphere on her tongue, hear the background buzz of a car driving around a street. She was experiencing all this sensory input that she had been so terrified to face for so long.

And she wasn't scared.

Elsa was standing outside and wasn't worried, wasn't frightened. Her breath shuddered and pure, unadulterated joy flooded her heart and made it hard to breathe. She nearly fell over and fainted as she tried to stop the tears of laughing joy from wetting her smile. But they fell. She cried again, this time with such a happy smile on her face that it brightened the night time air, like fireworks, like an explosion of pure marvel and joy. It was so bright that it blinded her to anything else.

She sobbed and could barely see, but was still looking around, shaking in place because she couldn't stay still. "I'm- I'm- I'm- I'm outside, I'm- I did it. I- I- I did it! I'm outside!" She was hyperventilating a little.

Elsa looked at the nearest street lamp. "Hello, street light!" She shouted into the night. Even she could hear the excitement oozing from the pores of her voice. She chose another object to fixate on. "Hello, house!" Then another. "Hi, Anna's car!" She spun, all the while shouting. "Hello, street, and- and person driving by, neighbors and trees! I know you're asleep, but hello birdies, how I've missed your songs!" She held her arms up above her head, gesturing to the vast night sky and shouting at it. "Hello moon! And stars! Hello world! Everything I've missed so dearly! Everything I wanted to see again!"

She dropped her hands, still smiling from ear to ear and still with trails of tears down her entire face and wetting her dress. This time, she whispered to the night-ridden world around her. "I'm back. I'm f-finally back."

She looked at Anna. "Anna, I'm outside! I- we did it!" Elsa was bouncing in place subconsciously. She didn't realize at first how tightly she was squeezing her sister's shoulders. Her nails were digging in quite far as she hysterically repeated her words and wiggled in place.

The younger's face was split from ear to ear by a smile that was just as genuine and excited as Elsa's. Even if she was clearly wincing from the onslaught of Elsa's nails. "Yeah!" Anna squeaked loudly, "we- you did!" She was grasping Elsa's shoulder's as well now, and the elder was hardly able to feel the vice-like grip upon her. Elsa was laughing, bouncing, and crying, and she could tell that her sister was doing just about the same thing. "I'm so, so proud of you, Elsa, you're so strong, you did it!"

They laughed and spun, the euphoria and grandeur of the moment giving Elsa the feeling that she was in a dream, like nothing was real. But she knew it was. It _was_ real. "I love you!" Anna piped up proudly.

This reigned the former-phobic's excitement. "I love you, too!"

Anna grinned. She bit her lip for a moment, and said "now, ehem, about um, about what you did a little while ago," letting the words hang between them like bait.

Elsa swam towards the bait Anna laid out, only to find it was the beacon on an angler fish. Elsa's heart dropped and every last bit of careless joy emptied out. _She's talking about me kissing her._ "Y-y-yeah." She was hardly able to feel the seismic surge of panic or begin her colossal self-scolding before she saw her little sister's eyes fill with purpose and determination.

Before Elsa knew it, she felt a heat like no other against her own lips once again. She felt her sister's fingers tangle in her hair and grip, she felt some nails dig into her back through her dress, she felt a spicy hot body press flush up against her own. She felt Anna _very_ purposefully kissing her on the lips. _Anna_ was kissing _her._ Elsa's mind was so indulged in the moment that it almost blanked. It wasn't until she felt a warm, soft, and shy tongue prod at her lips that she just about fainted. She saw stars and her knees gave out. Luckily, her sister caught her and supported her weight.

It was several moments before the stunned mind of Elsa's calmed down enough to return the kiss. She looked at her dearest Anna and reconnected their lips. It was still roaring like a white water river, but she was at least able to feel the fire in her heart and mouth and kiss back.

It was everything she had ever dreamed it would be.

After several minutes of unreal oral pleasure, both sisters pulled away from their display of love and looked each other in the eye. "I've been waiting to kiss you for a long time," Anna panted.

Elsa couldn't help the words from erupting, she was like and active volcano. "I'm so in love with you, Anna!"

Elsa was at long last able to say everything she had wanted to say to her dearest Anna for years now.

And by the way she responded, Elsa could tell that the words meant to Anna exactly what they meant to her, too. "I _love_ you too, Elsa."

"I- I fell for you years ago," the elder gushed honestly, opening her heart completely and exposing herself, because she knew she _could._

Anna smiled truly back and held their eye contact. The words practically appeared to give her sustenance, like she could survive off just them for the day. "Well," Anna began, her voice barely above a whisper, "now you have me."

Elsa blushed so hard that the frigid outside seemed a little too hot now. Or maybe that was from the kiss, or their confessions. Who really knows? "And _you_ have _me_ , and always will," she grinned.


	20. On New Terrain

It was funny how shy two sisters could get after finally admitting _everything_ to each other. Specifically, Elsa mused about how much easier it was to make Anna blush now, at the increase in awkward yet somehow pleasant silences, the more frequent bashful giggles and looks the sisters gave each other. Stairs and glances of red cheeks and not so shy desire swimming within their eyes. Ones where they intensely stared deeply into each other's eyes, expressing words without speech.

The kind of ones that they were giving each other at _that very_ moment. Elsa's cheeks scorched like she slept on a stove. She timidly breathed the tepid air between them as she continued giggling at Anna. Her own vision blurred slightly. Sometimes, laughter drove tears out.

Anna was smiling back, face as red as a vine fresh tomato, but as hot as a red chili pepper.

It all seemed like a series of glorious overreactions, confounding on each other and forming this sort of blob of ridiculousness that saturated the room and Elsa's mind. Even knowing this, she _still_ couldn't help her rushed and uneven breaths, she continually couldn't maintain a normal oxygen flow or properly regulate her body temperature.

It was just a morning kiss for crying out loud! Though it was quite a long, wet one provided by Anna right smack on top of Elsa's lips. And that had set off all of this. _We kissed much deeper than that last night!_ Elsa was thinking of their Ball the previous evening.

So, why was their admittedly less than chaste morning smooch eliciting such a response in _both_ girls? Was it that they were now exploring new terrain? Elsa's brows knitted together a little as she considered the solution. They were, after all, exploring on to brand new territory, virgin fields, forests, and mountains, never ever touched by either of the girls except in their own imaginations. And like all good adventurers, they were taking _very_ deliberate first steps, charting the terrain and getting a feel for every little bit they traveled before moving on.

 _Yes,_ Elsa thought, _we're being careful._ When someone's as careful as a cat walking on stilts, they're prone to making a big deal out of every single step. And a morning kiss, small of a step as it may be, is still a step, even if one backwards from the previous night when they kissed in the front yard. Elsa noted that all of their prior kisses were either on the cheek or corner of the lips.

Elsa smiled warmly at her Anna, a furnace burning within to power her open heart. "Well good morning to you too, Freckles."

Anna bit her lip and chortled. "I was a little nervous about it, I mean, I know we kissed last night and stuff but, I don't know, I was- I was just... nervous."

That comment would have swung at Elsa off guard and knocked her a little off-kilter if she hadn't spied the hints and worked out the logic in her mind just moments ago. It seemed a little odd for her boisterous and semi-reckless sister to not jump in to something head first. But at the same time, the fact that she _wasn't_ diving deep into a relationship with Elsa right off the bat suggested that she _really_ cared about this and was adamant not to risk messing it up.

So, as fluff grew irrefutably in Elsa's stomach, she just summed up her thoughts to Anna. "We're testing new waters." She paused, allowing Anna a moment to predict where she was going.

Sure enough, the younger sibling's eyes betrayed the successful clicking of gears making a connection and she happily said back "so let's not get in over our heads."

Elsa took both her sister's hands and nodded. "Exactly."

Anna grinned so intensely that it sort of impressed Elsa that her face didn't tear in two. "I love you."

With the flutter of a heart and the daze of seeing stars dance around her, the elder replied "I love you too."

It was Anna's mission, now, to show Elsa _everything._ Not that Elsa wanted to complain at all! Any excuse to rediscover the outside world was more than enough to bring a bright smile to the girl's eyes, and plus, Anna's excitement was almost unfairly endearing.

In the half week or so after kissing her sister for the first time, Elsa had wandered outside every bitter cold December day. She loved it. She waltzed around the yard with a silly grin on her face, examining each unique snowflake as it fluttered down in the frigid air. She'd laugh at the billowing fog her breath made in the air, spreading it around, pretending like she was a dragon from any one of the fantasy movies she loved to watch so dearly. _Now I can have my own adventures._

She choked on a lump of happiness at the thought. _Me and Anna can travel and see great things, I don't have to live vicariously anymore._ Her smile crept wider. _Not in any facet of my life,_ she reminded herself as she thought about the amount of kissing Anna and her had been doing. Warmth spread like a wildfire through her chest and suddenly it didn't feel so cold out.

Yes, she had been outside and around the yard, even a little ways down the street in the last few days, but there was one big thing Elsa was yet to tackle. And from her standpoint, that thing looked like a boulder in her path: getting into a car.

She stared blankly at the vehicle in front of her, her gloved hand hovering over the door handle. She stood on their driveway, having a staring contest with her reflection in Anna's car. The car she had seen drive away so many times, and this time, it intended to take her along for the trip.

Elsa's heart beat hard. Her mother died in a car. She gulped, trying to steal her breath.

"Elsa? Are you okay?" The concerned voice snapped the elder out of her one-woman staring contest. She looked up to see her sister peering over the roof of the car at her. Teal eyes were angled with concern, and her fiery hair was kept warm by a fluffy, pink winter cap.

"Ehem- um yes, I, I just haven't been in a car since, well, you know."

There was a momentary pause. "Yeah, I know," Anna said, quieter now. It was only a moment before she rounded the car to Elsa's side. She put a hand on the small of her sweet blonde's back. "You know, we don't have to go."

"N-no," Elsa said, closing her eyes in focus. "I want to."

Despite the cool, calm, and collected tone, she could hear the underlying smile it her sister's voice. "Okay, you take your time, okay? I'm right here for you."

Elsa's mouth turned up a little bit and she faced her dear Anna. "Thank you," she said, punctuating it by slowly leaning in for a drawn out kiss on the lips, which still made her cheeks glow bright red.

"Elsaa," the younger giggled, half serious, "what if someone sees?"

Much to even her own surprise, Elsa rebutted "then I guess they'll think we're even _weirder_ than they already do." She just experienced surprisingly little internal strife over the matter. Maybe not seeing the world for years had its perks. _Out of sight, out of mind, right?_ Elsa was simply too happy about her two recent, life-changing events to be bothered about what some random people thought.

Anna chewed her lip with very bemused half smile. "I can't even properly express how much I _love_ you."

And that made Elsa smile inside and out. It catalyzed her courage and before she knew it, she was retorting "then you'll just have to show me," as she opened the car door and climbed inside.

She caught the preface of her sister screeching in delight before she shut the door and awed at how Anna made practically one smooth leap over the hood of the car to get in the driver's side. "Elsa! I'm so proud of you!"

She'd done it. Compared to her recent achievements, it was was a minor hurdle, but she'd gotten into a car. Elsa's heart skipped a beat, her temples thumping like victory drums. She drew a shaky breath and clutched her hands together. She was still nervous about the drive, but Anna was there, so she could do it.

For the first time in forever, Elsa felt as if she had a handle on everything. She had grabbed the bull by the horns and through conflict, grit, determination, and loving support had gained the strength to steer it.

It wasn't much longer until they were on their way. Anna sat in the driver's seat with an almost comforting amalgamation of concern and giddiness. Every time Elsa looked at her, which was most of the time, her lithe shoulders and arms were bouncing just like her rump in her chair, humming. Frequently, she'd glance to her elder and ask how she was doing.

Though Elsa still felt the unwelcome pinpricks of unease in her gut and her instincts deep down telling her she shouldn't be in a car, she'd remain strong and say something like "I'm okay." She was, however, a little pacified by Anna's driving. She was careful not to speed or take turns too fast, which, whether or not this was how her sister normally drove, Elsa very much appreciated.

"Just a few more minutes" the younger said a little while into the drive. It'd been about twenty minutes already.

Elsa silently breathed a sigh of relief. "I can't wait."

True to her word, it was only a few more minutes until Anna pulled her car into a parking lot. They both stepped out, Elsa a little dizzy upon standing up and more relieved than she cared to admit to be out of that moving metal box. She looked around at brick buildings, meticulous landscaping, and largely empty footpaths connecting everything.

"This," Anna exclaimed, holding her arms up and twirling, "is where I've been going to school."

"That much I figured out," Elsa teased.

"Okay, Smartypants," the younger scolded with her hands on her hips, "but have you figured out which classrooms are mine?"

Rolling her eyes like happy marbles, the elder replied "I hadn't quite gotten then far, no."

Anna lit up with a victorious smirk. "Well then follow me, my genius sister."

Elsa chuckled and blushed slightly, but nonetheless tailed the innocently smug girl beckoning her.

They spent the next hour or so waltzing back and forth along the inlaid brick pathways of campus, cutting across large lawns that Elsa assumed were probably quite popular to hang out around during the school semesters. She took in all the sights, the smells, the sounds, the slightly different taste that the air carried from the one within her own home. Maybe it was all the scenic grass and well groomed trees invading her sight, but the entire area smelled—and tasted—green.

Elsa couldn't help but wonder what it looked like packed with students lollygagging and rushing alike between classes. It was, of course, Winter break, which left the entire campus rather barren. She smiled and silently decided that she'd have to come back during the school semester just to see what it was like. Maybe she could go with Anna when she went to class. Elsa wouldn't mind spending a day outside reading in the sunlight during the Spring.

This basic plan made her tingle inside with warmth and fuzz. It made her excited to be alive because it meant she was no longer bound to her house.

Her thoughts were interrupted, however, as the solitude of the ghost campus was broken by a third soul, punctuated by Anna stopping quite suddenly. Elsa looked at her sister, puzzled. She hadn't bothered to check who the third wanderer was, but she presumed it was someone just taking a stroll. Perhaps it was a professor come to do some work. She didn't care, she was too busy analyzing the angry stare that Anna now displayed for said person.

The younger sister seemed to puff up like a cornered cat trying to appear larger to dissuade its threat. Elsa now followed Anna's gaze and looked at the newcomer.

 _Hans._ Elsa's heart tightened in her throat. Her vision tunneled, her ears beginning to ring. She fought with shaking breaths as she made contact with those brown eyes and ridiculous side burns. This was _not_ helping to become reacquainted with the outside world, she _refused_ to lose any ground she'd just won back against her phobia!

So, through the mangled mess of swirling anxiety in her mind, she did her best to create a line of logic to calm herself down. _Anna broke up with him. He was wrong about_ _me_ _._ Suddenly, the December breeze no longer carried an elixir of calm, but a poison of panic. She closed her eyes to focus.

 _I'm more than he thought_ _. I_ am _outside. I_ did _overcome my phobia._ She repeated this like a mantra. _I'm stronger than he thought I was. And,_ her next thought actually summoned a smile through her murky mind, _Anna chose me._

That began to clear the raging river of her thoughts. _Anna_ _chose me_ _. I'm outside._ Elsa smiled and looked up, regaining her control, reaffirming her strength. "Elsa-?"

"It's okay," the elder interrupted, taking her sister's hand in the process. "Let's go," she said as she made eye contact with her adversary and glaredat him as sharply as a razor and as intensely as the sun's flames, silently telling him off. She looked at her sister.

Anna was proudly grinning back. She was definitely not personally affected by seeing her ex-manipulator, so her hostile aura must have been a show, put up to protect Elsa. "Let's not let him ruin our day," she chirped like a singing bird.

"Don't worry, we won't," Elsa said with a sidelong glance.

"Good! Now, what do you wanna do next?"

Elsa thought for a moment. It'd been so long, she didn't really know where to start. So, she decided to play it a little safe and go with something that held some familiarity. "How about we go to a movie?" Plus, Elsa wouldn't at all mind being in the semi-private, dark room with her sister.

"That," her adorable Freckles started dramatically, "sounds like a wonderful idea."

* * *

The two had by now looked up show times and decided on what they wanted to see. A scary flick starting in the evening. Elsa just hoped that it would be frightening enough to keep Anna in her arms the entire time. _Please,_ she reminded herself, _as if she'll even_ try _to look for an excuse for that!_

They were now in the car once more, on the way to the theater. Elsa had done much better getting in the vehicle the second time around, though she still hesitated quite a bit. It was improvement, though, and she was proud of herself.

For the first half of the ride, she just lovingly examined her sister. Anna wore a light green dress that looked rather thin for the weather now. Elsa recalled asking her if she'd be warm enough before they left, and felt a wonderful surge at Anna's endearing response. _"_ _What's a couple minutes of being cold in the parking lot to looking my best for you?"_

"Sooo..." Anna droned, exaggerating her mouth as she spoke and popping Elsa out of her bubble of thought.

Elsa looked at her, a little perplexed. The younger sibling looked to have a little unnatural redness and seemed to be somewhat diffident in her demeanor. "Yesss?" Elsa caricaturized the word as she raised one eyebrow. She shifted slightly in her seat. Anna's behavior made her elder feel a little tension of anticipation.

"I've been thinking, you know, and now we're going to a movie- like out to a movie, not just watching one on the couch like normal- not that I mind that, I love it! Any time spent with you is amazing, I would never complain about it-"

"Anna," the passenger half scolded, attempting to steer the derailed train of her lovely younger sister's thoughts back on to the proper tracks.

It worked. "Right, off topic. Well, we're going out to a movie, so is this like- um what would you call what we're doing?"

She provided Elsa with a sidelong glance and partial embarrassed wince. Elsa's heart beat like a rabid animal, sending a flurry of warm blood to swirl and swarm around each and every one of her body parts. "What do you mean?"

"I mean we don't have to label it if you don't _want_ to it's just- um, it's just well, would you consider this our first _official_ date? Or our second?" Anna's hand was clammy when it grabbed hers.

Elsa stared as blankly. Her mind was wiped clean. While her mind was processing about the same speed as a frozen computer, her heart was billowing love and excitement directly into her bloodstream. Soon enough, the feelings flowing from her heart found her mind. Her mouth felt dry and everything but Anna's immaculate hair and gorgeous face seemed to obscure into the periphery of her vision.

Elsa thought about the ball that Anna labored so intensively to make perfect. This was certainly what Anna was referring to a second ago. The elder considered everything that had happened, from their dancing, to the awkward moments, to the kissing, to the confessions of _love._ Her already bright red face turned a rich crimson, she felt the sudden urge to turn off the heat in the car.

"Well," Elsa started, noticing the timbre of her voice being a shaking mess. "We did kiss after our dance."

Anna giggled in half relief have excitement. It made Elsa chortle, too. "So this is our second date, but our first time officially going _out_."

Elsa's heart swelled. "Yes, exactly." _Going out, with Anna._ Actually out, away from the house, like she'd always wanted.

"I'm so proud of you, Blondie."

Elsa didn't try to hide her smile.

* * *

Elsa stopped to breathe in the air around her. It wasn't fresh air, but it was quite pleasingly aromatic. It felt cold as it rushed into her nostrils, making the invisible hairs on her arms stand on end. The infused scent of popcorn catalyzed a growl in the girl's stomach watered her mouth. Her jumbo bag of popcorn tingling her hands with fresh warmth as she held it. She felt like she was in a sensory dream. The rumble of advertisements played in the background as the hustle and bustle of parties of people not wanting to miss the introduction flurried around her. But Elsa was in no rush. Even what should have been a banal interaction with her clerk behind the counter was enthralling, once Elsa overcame her reflexive reservations.

It was weird feeling to talk to people outside of her own home, odd to purchase items in person. Wonderful, but strange. True, the clerk had glared back at Elsa's order, mostly because she kept getting distracted by her beautiful and _official_ date, but Elsa had thoroughly enjoyed true interaction outside of her house.

"Okay silly, I know this must be the best smelling spot in the theater, but let's get to our seats before you take in the atmosphere," Anna joked.

Elsa blushed and opened her eyes. She was standing in the middle of the hallway. After so many years inside and being able to retreat into her own imagination whenever she wanted, she'd have to get used to waiting to do such a thing. "Yeah yeah," she said, still with a small grin, "I'll try to plan my moments better in the future."

Anna slugged Elsa's shoulder very lightly and playfully. "It'd be cozier to have one in the seat, anyway."

 _Well, she's not wrong._ "Lead the way, gorgeous."

Elsa could see the proud, shy, and flattered grin on the side of her sister's face as Anna moved to follow her orders.

And comfortable the chairs were. They sat near the middle of a somewhat far back row. Initially when they sat down, they were kept separated by a heinous monster that was, ironically, engineered for comfort. Anna was quick to vanquish such an unnecessary armrest, enabling the couple to squish together.

Anna placed her head against her sister's shoulder, reaching an arm around a lithe stomach. Elsa accepted this, keeping one hand on a shapely thigh, brushing away a dress a little, and the other at the ready near the bag of salty popped corn.

Elsa tossed a morsel in her mouth. "You know," she said, "I forgot how delicious fresh movie theater popcorn is."

With a smirk, the younger girl reached over and snagged a handful of their snack. "Well now we can come get some all the time," she winked.

"That would be a lot of dates," Elsa very playfully quipped.

A misleadingly innocent shrug was the reply. "I'm okay with that."

Elsa's grin turned wry. "Me too."

Not even five seconds later, a heated sensation erupted from her cheek as if it were fire blown from billows. She blushed and pressed into the incredibly soft lips on her face for a moment, only to turn and catch them on her own lips fast as a cat. She felt her sister smile into the kiss.

They both hummed into the kiss like contented birds, staying their course for several seconds. Elsa licked the malleable inside of Anna's lips, feeling the fluid texture glide across her tongue. Foreign but familiar teeth parted and they tongues began to interlock, tasting as much of the other as they could.

Others seeing them, at least where they were, wasn't a big problem in Elsa's mind. In their front yard was one thing, as their neighbors may more may not be able to piece together that they were sisters if they caught them, but in the darkness at a movie theater? _Who cares,_ Elsa decided, _I've been inside for five years, it's not like anyone would recognize me, anyway._

Anna must have been on a similar line of thought, because the fire flowing through her kiss grew and intensified. The elder began to feel a tingle and burning in her core certainly wrought from the conflagration her younger was spitting forth. Her breathing became heavier and more ragged, her available hand finding it's own way to the small of Anna's waist.

Hot breath flooded Elsa's own cheeks, rolling down her neck to where her sister's arm was placed, wrapped around Elsa's burning skin. Their bodies were pressed together, creating an intense friction, but Elsa wanted _more_ of it, so she pressed harder. Her hand roamed Anna's back, she felt the clip of a bra underneath her fingers, but she continued feeling the back of a soft dress. She felt the grip around her tighten as a wet tongue licked the gums behind her teeth. She reacted with a racing heart and clenched her nails into fabric and skin.

Just then, a loud introduction to their movie ripped through their ears, getting in the space between them, and prying them apart. They sat apart just far enough to really look at each other, the exaggerated rise and fall of Anna's chest striking Elsa's attention.

Chewing her lip with a lopsided grin, Anna commented "Whoa, Elsa, that was intense." Her voice had a prominent husky undertone that made Elsa's head spin a little.

Catching a seriously rosy blush, the elder giggled and said "that it was, Freckles." After a moment of silence, once corner of her mouth pulled up, and in as seductive of a tone as she could muster, she continued. "We should _explore_ some more soon."

It should have been too dark to see how red Anna's face was. Maybe Elsa's rather vivid imagination was filling in the gaps, or maybe the younger girl was literally _glowing_ with a blush. "Oh, don't you worry, we will." With that, and not giving her elder a chance to respond, she spun to look at the movie screen and pressed herself back into Elsa's chest.

Elsa wondered if her sister could feel the thunderous pounding of her heart as she sank into the cuddles, grinned from ear to ear, and rested her hand once more on her lovable sibling's thigh.

They enjoyed the movie in relative silence. The kind of silence that one could bask in as it strengthened a bond and snaked it's way around the couple, making them feel cozy as can be in their place. It was broken only by the film, the gasps of the audience, and the squeaks from Anna and Elsa at any jump scare. And every time they jumped in fright, they inched closer and closer.

Elsa trotted off to the bathroom to prepare herself for bed. She had just gotten home from what was, as far as she was concerned, her first late night out. In reality, the movie her and Anna had gone to see didn't end long passed ten in the evening. For Elsa though, that was a little late, and, more importantly, the time wasn't spent at _home_. It was an evening out having a blast with her lover; a night reigned with high spirits and titillating experiences.

The girl smiled. She'd finally been on a proper date with Anna. It wasn't exactly how she'd always fantasized about, with fancy dresses and a low lit restaurant, but that was okay. She couldn't expect reality to _always_ live up to her romanticized expectations, although it often did when dealing with Anna.

 _But we have now been on a date._ She grinned like a fool and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror.

Happy. That's really the only word that came to mind when she saw her expression. The light that shined through her eyes made them look a crystalline blue, brilliantly balanced with the radiance of her lips poking upwards into her cheeks. Elsa saw the same pale body she always saw, but just like her face with a crinkled nose, it exuded more confidence and joy than in years previous. Her shoulders were pulled back, her chip up, and her demeanor befitting her triumphs.

As she looked passed her eyes and examined how others must see her, she saw the same girl she used to. The one that was deeply in love and willing to do anything for it. No, that part of her hadn't changed one bit. But something _did_ change. She no longer looked at herself and saw hopeless love, she saw hope _ful_ love.

Beyond that, she didn't see the same, unconfident wreck peering back at her. She saw pride in herself. She saw a _woman_ who had overcome the impossible, who had usurped a mountain only to fight an immovable beast after. No longer someone with dreams slipping from her grasp like snakes, but someone who'd managed to snatch and keep those dreams against all odds, and nurtured them until they blossomed into beautiful flowers.

Elsa saw someone who's dreams had come true, someone successful. She saw the woman she'd always aspired to be, but never _actually_ thought she'd become.


	21. Christmas Eve

Blurry, fantastical, incoherently quick, and flirtatious were what the next couple of weeks or so felt like to Elsa. She felt like she was lost in a dreamland of candy clouds, blue skies, and happiness twisted into a physical incarnation. Her and Anna were certainly being slapped around viciously by the honeymoon phase of their relationship, where everything's exactly as sweet as a candied cherry.

The sisters spent the days bathing in the sunshine like rays of each other's company. Anna seemed to be more than content to just walk around and explore different parks with Elsa on the days during which the wind wasn't biting enough to chomp their fingers and noses into icy oblivion. It was simple, no pressure, just what Elsa needed. She was able to engulf herself back into the outside world at the speed that _she_ wanted.

Their evenings were always just as magical. They were still being cautious and moving purposefully through their relationship, and as far as bedroom activities, they hadn't advanced a whole lot, nor were they standing still. They were taking a tiny step each day. It was night now, on the first day of Winter, and these carnal exercises were exactly what Elsa had her mind on as she lay in bed waiting for Anna to join her for the night. Anna was in the shower, and it had been quite some time since Elsa took some alone time to take care of her needs. So, her mind was fixating on her sister in the shower, the hot water and soapy bubbles running scantly down her curves, and the possibilities of how Elsa could _help_ Anna bathe.

She felt the familiar and incredibly welcomed tingling pull from between her legs and sucked in some hot air to keep herself in check. Anna would be back from the shower soon. Elsa practically held her breath until the door opened.

In came her stunning younger sister in her usual gown. Elsa could _certainly_ discern that Anna did not have a bra on, much like herself. It drove her desires even more recklessly, and the second that her sister was in the bed, Elsa slammed their lips together.

Anna squealed into the elder's mouth in surprise, smiling with eyes that widened abruptly but soon became half-lidded. She began to kiss back just as passionately, laying her body on top of Elsa's. Their tongues dragged together, the wet and smooth yet bumpy texture pouring electricity down the elder's spine. Elsa arched her back in reaction to the spicy feeling, allowing Anna to snake her hand under Elsa's garment and on to a bridged, pale spine, digging her fingernails in.

Elsa gasped slightly, the sharp pain of her sister's nails in her back somehow felt wonderful and _erotic._ Her skin felt like fire and she wanted _more._ She wrapped her arms around her sister, tangling one hand into auburn hair. She yanked, not to get the hand back, but just because it felt _right._ Anna gasped at this, allowing her head to be tilted back with slightly parted lips. They made eye contact for a split second and Elsa could see the demand for more sparkling in Anna's eyes like the North Star.

Her little sibling's desire was granted. They rolled, and Anna pressed her chest against Elsa's, planting her knee between the Elder's legs, so close to her burning core that she swore if she focused, she could _feel_ it. Elsa picked her knee up, somewhat mirroring Anna's position, and they drove closer. The contact when her sibling's leg just brushing her panties _boiled_ in Elsa's core. Her heart rate was incredibly fast, her breathing shallow and uneven, and she could feel how wet she was becoming.

Anna bit her lip, which melted the elder's mind, and leaned in to continue their lips' embrace. Every point of contact between the two girls felt, to Elsa, like being touched with a branding rod. She swore she was melting into the sheets below and her mind was swirling like a whirlpool. She closed her eyes.

The lips on her own trailed down to focus momentarily just on her lower lip, leaving it damp as they continued their descent and began focusing on Elsa's neck. Her heart beat louder than a war drum, drowning out every other noise. Anna nipped at her neck and it elicited an amazing feeling within Elsa.

Anna's hand grabbed the elder's thigh and Elsa's back arched even more in delight. Elsa was panting hard. She wanted this, she'd pined for this for years. The two had been taking things slow and this steamy session was a definite escalation of anything they'd done before. And Elsa was feeling the uncertainty of venturing so far into new terrain.

Yes, she wanted this with everything mental and physical in her body.

But it was new for her. Elsa had never done anything like this with anyone before. No matter which way her mind spun the situation, Elsa kept coming to the feeling that she simply wasn't ready.

At that second, Anna inquired "Elsa?"

The elder looked at her younger sibling, noting the concern in the teal of those big, beautiful eyes. Elsa became slightly anxious trying to figure out why Anna was so apprehensive. "Yes?"

"Did um," Anna tucked some hair behind her ear, a dead giveaway that she was nervous. She gulped. "Did I go too far?"

Elsa pursed her lips. "I um-..."

"B-because I kept going and you um, you just kinda stopped doing anything and- and I hope I didn't make you scared or push you too far or anything-"

"No no no, Anna, no, you're fine, I was just," Elsa paused a moment, bringing her hands up such that she could gently rest her palms upon her sister's cheek. "You stopped right when I started to get nervous, not later." Her voice was as steady as a reassuring elder's was expected to be.

The brows over Anna's eyes loosened, but she seemed to calm down. "are you sure?"

Elsa smiled, playing with her thumb over the velvety smooth skin of a freckled face. "Completely sure."

They soon settled in each other's arms for bed, sinking into the silken sheets. Elsa mused over their... progress for quite some time before finally drifting to sleep. Everything just seemed so _perfect_ , almost like she was living a dream. Elsa was just so _Happy._

* * *

Christmas Eve somehow _smelled_ like happiness and anticipation. Maybe it was the nutmeg, peppermint, and frost culminating in the atmosphere with a dance of sweet delicacy everywhere they went. Or possibly the loose smell of holly in all the stores and around their house, intertwined with armies of decorations, similar to how it was the night of Elsa and Anna's ball.

The spirit was definitely there everywhere in the mall. Elsa smiled, feeling light on her feet as she walked alone by a massive Christmas tree in the atrium of the enormous indoor mall. In front of the tree was Santa, smiling and asking children what they'd like for the holiday while parents proudly stood by and captured such a precious moment in time forever with their cameras. Elsa's heart fluttered as she remembered those days as a kid. Her and Anna always refused to go up separately, they wanted to sit on Santa's lap _together._ She smiled in nostalgia as she moved along to some stores.

A few clothing stores first, because who _didn't_ like getting a nice dress, coat, or shoes for Christmas? Every time she considered an item, Elsa would reflexively look over her shoulder, making sure that Anna wasn't pulling a fast one and following her to get an early glimpse of the Christmas treasures. Each time, however, the bubbly younger girl wasn't there and Elsa like to think about what store Anna was in shopping for _her._

After considering several options, the elder, in the third store she visited, settled on a nice, rich green dress for her sister. It was a winter gown, with thick material for warmth. It was still soft, and came down to the ankles. The bodice was form fitting and long sleeved, not revealing at all. Elsa almost selfishly wished that it _was_ revealing. As she was purchasing the dress, she spotted some laced, red, Christmas-themed panty and bra combos and Elsa got a naughty idea. Her heart skipped a beat in the heat rising within her churning stomach. _Would that be too much for where we are?_

She finished her transaction and couldn't bring herself to leave the store _without_ the secondary gift. After all, Elsa _knew_ she knew Anna well enough to be certain that she'd love it.

Elsa bought the combo.

She then turned her attention away from clothes, wanting something more unique for her sister. She took a quick glance around and began peruse some more stores. She didn't necessarily want something expensive, she wanted something _meaningful._

Not long later, Elsa saw it. "Perfect,"is all she could mutter to herself in transfixed awe. She peered propitiously at a lovely piece of jewelery. Well, _two_ pieces. They were a pair of necklaces. Dangling from one was a small, heart shaped locket. It was silver and gold, carved with a fancy but not overly-busy trimming. It was sleek and beautiful, not showy and shiny. In the middle of the heart was a small hole. No doubt to fit its sister necklace, which didn't have a heart hanging, but rather a tiny, silver key. This necklace was pure silver, no gold trimming, but looked masterfully carved.

Elsa requested to take the items in question out of the jewelery box and fiddled with them on the glass counter top. To her immense joy, wreaking a wide, excited grin across her face and sending delighting shivers down her spine, the key fit the pendant, and even unlocked it to let it swing open. _Just like all the literal and figurative doors I've opened this year._ Inside was revealed to be a small area to store a little photo, or something. And the only way in was with that little key. Elsa smiled at the set. "I'll take it." Her stomach was already buzzing with excitement. This was _perfect._

"There you are!" Elsa snapped to the voice, quickly locating it's source in the horde of people moving around much like a school of fish. Her radiant sister seemed to shine like the sunlight through the crowd with her bright smile, clearly hiding some full bags behind herself. Elsa did the same, jetting her hand full of goodies for Anna behind her back. She couldn't help the loose smile that formed just as seeing her Anna. Beautiful even in regular old jeans and a coat.

"Took ya long enough," the younger continued facetiously.

Elsa's eyes did a very familiar barrel roll as she giggled. "Looks like you weren't any faster."

Anna smirked. "Yes but _I_ had to find the perfect gift." She stood tall and proud, puffing her chest out to drive her point home.

"Oh and you think I would leave you with anything less than the best?" Elsa raised her signature eyebrow.

The younger sibling's face dropped to casually curious, practically whistling and all. She sidestepped while honing her eyes in on the bags behind Elsa, who effortlessly twirled to continue blocking Anna's vision.

"No no, you have to wait until tomorrow, Freckles."

Anna smiled and lowered her eyebrows in a playful glare. "Then so will you."

Turning her chin up in a mockingly posh manner, Elsa agreed "I'd expect nothing less."

Mirroring her elder's tone, Anna quipped "very well, then," and started walking towards the car. Elsa followed. It was time to head home and relax until _Christmas._

* * *

Elsa adored 'Elf'. It was one of her favorites to watch. After all, not really celebrating Christmas for five years didn't mean that she altogether avoided the holiday suggestions when it came to movies. Even now, though she'd seen it a few times, Elsa's face began to heat up and turn red as Buddy quietly began his duet of "It's Cold Outside." Elsa placed herself in Jovie's shoes, or rather her bare feet, in the shower and could only _imagine_ how uncomfortable she'd be if a stranger saw her in the shower!

Anna, who was in her normal spot with her head right upon her Elder's heart, must have noticed a slight increase in the regular heartbeat below her ear, because she chose _that_ moment to tease Elsa. "You know, sometimes I hear _you_ singing in the shower."

Just because of the double embarrassment of the instant, Elsa's cheeks glowed bright and her eyes blinked rapidly of their own accord. "I- wait, I don't... Do I?"

Anna smirked. "Sometimes."

Elsa was dumbfounded because she didn't even _realize_ that she did such a thing, really. Though she supposed it was possible, because she sometimes (actually rather frequently) got lost in her own mind in the shower. She just wondered what she sung about. "I..."

"Relax, Blondie, it's not the best singing voice but _I_ still think it's beautiful."

Still blushing, Elsa questioned "no the best, huh?" Now with a small smile as she got over her hump of shock.

With a giddy shake of the head, Anna playfully poked "nowhere near. In fact, I could say that you could do with lessons, for the sake of my ears, of course."

Elsa chortled, rapidly trying to think of a witty comeback, all the while nonchalantly playing with fiery hair. "Yeah, well I've heard you-" Elsa's words got caught in a filter, thankfully. Her eyes went wide and her mouth hung there, at a loss for what to say. Her mind whirled back to the evening that she heard Anna pleasuring herself in the shower, and so many feelings gnawed at the elder at once. Arousal, steaming below the surface, nausea, butterflies in her stomach, she was about to go _there._

"You heard me..." Anna questioningly and suspiciously prompted after what must have been a few seconds of radio silence from her elder.

Elsa could only looked back into teal irises as she scrambled to find something else to say. No matter how much she clawed or how many ideas she hooked, when she reeled them in, all she could think about were those moans, those soft, fast, heart-pounding noises. The first time Elsa heard Anna making any sort of sound like _that_. "I..." Anna's face was growing more confused and Elsa feared that Anna was coming closer to realizing what she was referring to by the second.

After a few more incredibly, crushingly tense moments, the quietude between them was broken by a loud buzzing noise. They both snapped their attention to the source, Elsa heavily relieved. _Saved by the bell._

Anna's phone was rattling on the coffee table. Elsa had no trouble identifying the silly picture of Rapunzel that popped up on the screen _._ She choked on her heart and her stomach suddenly felt heavy.

A quick glance was passed Elsa's way before Anna answered it. It conveyed concern, as if to efficiently and wordlessly figure out what the elder was feeling. And in that split second, Elsa was able to wonder how Rapunzel was doing, how her and Anna's friendship was, if she was ready to talk to Elsa again. All in that instant, Elsa felt bad for not bringing it up at all, her friend, she hadn't spared a thought for her in quite some time.

"Hey, 'Punzel! What's up?" Anna's eyes once again flickered to Elsa's. The older sister couldn't hear what Rapunzel was saying, so she subjected herself to watching one side of the conversation. For a while, it was exactly what you'd expect from a phone conversation between two teenagers. Anna's happy demeanor and thrilled tone when she squeaked back to the phone even put Elsa at ease, allowing the tension to billow out like smoke until the fire of anxiety was quenched.

It was a lot of agreement and small talk, some shallow catching up to begin with. Later, Elsa realized that that should have tipped her off to the real reason for the call, why would two friends go through such shallow subjects for so long?

"Yeah, it's been good- great, actually," Anna replied to her phone excitedly. "Just spending the days with-" Anna hesitated for a second, looking at her sister "the best sister ever."

A moment of silence, the tiny murmuring of Rapunzel's incomprehensible voice breaking the background noise. Anna started again. "No, not really, we're just gonna spend it at home together."

Elsa furrowed her brows. _What are they talking about?_

"Yeah, it'll be nice," Anna was smiling and bouncy as she spoke. "I'm looking forward to spending Christmas with her." Elsa's heart skipped a beat. "Yeah, we're watching Elf!"

 _Is Rapunzel asking questions directly about me now?_ Elsa looked pleadingly at her sibling.

"She's good- great- fantastic, actually, I- oh... uh-huh..." Anna's face become much more serious, her eyebrows creased. She took the phone from her ear, placing her hand over the microphone and whispered to Elsa "she's calling to ask about you."

Elsa nearly choked and passed out. Anna placed a hand on her thigh, acting like a beacon, and gently soothing with soft caresses. She returned to the phone call. "Yeah, um, let me- I uh," she just drawled for a second before looking intently at Elsa. The stare was so intense that it felt like it was a sword piercing into the elder, like her thoughts and feelings were being x-rayed. Elsa couldn't breathe.

"Actually um, can we talk about it tomorrow? I can come over-" This didn't help Elsa's anxiety at all. It grabbed her like a pernicious shark. "Yeah- 'cause, you know, this- this might be easier to talk about in person, plus, I- I have a surprise for you."

Anna's face lightened up a little. "Okay, great, yep, bye Rapunzel, love you too, bye." She hung up and met Elsa's gaze. Anna looked to be considering something very seriously. It did not help Elsa, she began to physically clamp up like a clam, as if it'd protect her from what she was feeling. Elsa hugged her braid and knees to her chest, frightened.

"Elsa," Anna softly said, scooting closer. "Tomorrow, we're gonna go to Rapunzel's to talk with her." The freckled beauty in front of her clearly knew she was throwing quite a punch, and attempted to mitigate the blow with calm behavior.

The cowardice she felt pulsing through her veins like a poison made Elsa feel like she was back to before the ball, before she was _free._ She didn't like it. "I um, I don't know."

"I know, I know, it'll be hard and scary, but I know you can do it." Anna looked genuine. It pained Elsa that Anna wanted so dearly to do something that she saw as leagues outside her realm of possibilities.

"I don't- I don't want to."

Anna put a hand on Elsa's thigh. "Elsa, I know it's a big step, but I also know that deep down you _do_ want to go."

"And how would you know that?" The Elder let her words slip out defensively.

It was actually a couple seconds before the auburn haired sibling managed to articulate her point. "Because I know you still want to be friends with Rapunzel, like before, and the only way to do that is actually _talk_ to her. I know you know that."

Yes, that was all accurate with marksman-like precision. Bowing her head, a little ashamed of how hard this was for her, and even somewhat irritated at the situation, Elsa rebutted "I'm scared." Everything had been so perfect, it was Christmas Eve, did this really have to happen _now_!?

Anna was now circumscribing her sister with her arms, surrounding her with warmth and soft assurance. "Oh, Elsa, I know you are, and it's okay to be scared, but this will be good for you."

"Y-yeah but, I'm- I don't think I'm ready."

"I know you're ready."

"How?" Elsa snapped back sharply. "How could you possibly know that?"

For the second time in as many minutes, Anna stayed mute. She was only troubled by her elder's acrimony for a short while, though. "Because," she finally began evenhandedly, "you weren't jealous when I was on the phone-"

That was true, Elsa reluctantly admitted to herself. Her own stubbornness partially eroded like a sand dune, supplanted by her veneration of Anna. She nodded.

"- _and_ you know that I know that you want to stay friends with Rapunzel-" Elsa's brain took a moment to process her sister's convoluted phrase. It was an odd way to put it, but at the same time, it was so _Anna._ "- _and,"_ the younger really drawled out, holding up a finger to really drive her point home like a grand slam, "Rapunzel is ready." She let the silence flow in and act as a catalyst to Elsa's consideration of her final reason.

It almost made the elder's ears ring, not for just the deafening truth of the statement, or jarring suddenness of finding such a thing out, but due to the dead silence that seemed to confine Elsa as she carefully thought about it. Rapunzel _had_ just called and asked about Elsa and, from the sound of it, requested to speak to Elsa. Maybe she called Anna to test the waters, or in fear that Elsa might see the name and not be able to answer. That didn't matter. Anna knew for a fact that Rapunzel was ready, and now Elsa did, too.

The eldest closed her eyes and dragged a deep breath of the thick air between them. It felt like it was filling her stomach. "You're right," she breathed.

Without a word, the younger sibling leaned into her elder, laying against her. It felt good, especially when Anna's arm laid across a thin, pale stomach. "Thank you, Elsa," she whispered. Her warm breath trickled like water down Elsa's neck and tickled her ear.

"What for?" Elsa furrowed her brows.

Anna shrugged into their loose yet close-knit embrace and smiled pleasantly. "For trusting me."

Elsa could feel the tenderness of the moment pulsating through her heart. "Well," she murmured, "I don't have much of a choice, now do I?"

A breathy chortle was the first response, followed swiftly by a soft, playful flick to the tip of Elsa's button nose. She closed her eyes and scrunched her nose up at the attack, unable to help a grin. "No you don't," Anna said in a sly voice. She didn't hesitate to lean in for a slow, deep kiss, which Elsa gladly returned. It made her insides light up like a string of Christmas lights on the Winter Solstice.

Buddy the Elf so rudely interrupted their moment by screaming. Elsa jumped a little, having forgotten about their background entertainment, and looked back at the TV. She once more got comfortable with Anna and began paying more attention to the movie, but not before stealing another glance at the freckled face she loved so much.

Anna clearly wasn't watching the movie, nor Elsa, she looked like she was thinking about something. _Is is something about tomorrow?_ Anxiety rose slightly in Elsa's ribcage, but just before she could ask, her sister blurted "I'll uh, I'll be right back."

At a slight loss, Elsa inquired "where are you going?"

Anna, having already jumped up and starting to walk away, looked back and muttered "the- um- the bathroom."

Once more, the elder found her eyebrows drawing close together and creasing her forehead. That was an odd way for Anna to excuse herself. Elsa _knew_ something was up. She mused about it for a few moments, and when she asked, Anna just repeated the same reason: the restroom.

But it just didn't sit right with Elsa. It was like a puzzle piece that was carved wrong- not that it really bothered her all that much, but Anna was definitely up to some kind of mischief.

All that and by the time the movie ended and it was time to go to sleep on a quiet, semi-peaceful Christmas Eve, it was still gnawing in the back of her mind. As she climbed the steps, while she trotted next to her sister down the hall, as she entered her door-

"Wait, Elsa!"

The elder snapped out of it, quickly turning to find Anna and heart picking up to figure out why she was being yelled at. "What? Anna, huh?"

She saw her sibling with arms behind her back, grinning at her with what was almost a puppy-dog face. "Anna," Elsa chided.

"You missed something," was the cryptic answer.

Confused, Elsa looked around, not keeping her eyes off of her sister for very long. No matter where she analyzed, though, everything seemed to be the same. It several seconds before she asked "what do you mean?"

Smirking, Anna suggested "look up."

A few green leaves dangled above Elsa's head. It was... a _mistletoe_. Ice eyes widened, her heart skipped a beat, and her stomach buzzed in a way that almost hurt but felt so _right_. She looked back down to see Anna purposefully walking forward. Just before they met, Elsa spoke. "The bathroom? That was your best excuse?"

Anna nodded, her mouth still wry. There was a twinkle in her eyes, a streak of desire, and the same shine she saw a few nights prior while they were _exploring_ in bed.

Elsa felt just one corner of her own mouth pull up into her cheek. Her heart fluttered, and before she knew it, the two were caught in a completely natural feeling, very affectionate kiss.

Anna started pushing, walking forwards, forcing Elsa through the door frame and swinging the portal shut behind herself. Anna wasn't shy with deepening the kiss, her tongue demanded entry, finagling its way into Elsa's mouth. Anna _knew_ that Elsa wanted it, and Elsa _loved_ that Anna knew.

Despite being the shorter of the two, Anna continued to assert dominance. Elsa let herself be pushed backwards, every step driving her heart faster, heating her body more. By the time she tripped onto the bed, fires of desire were alight from her chest down to her core and her breathing was becoming ragged.

She gasped when foreign nails dug into her shoulder, when Anna hovered over her on all fours, still leading the kiss. Elsa moaned softly when her sister nibbled on her lips, pulling them slightly with her gentle teeth and breaking the kiss.

In the silver glow of the Christmas moonlight, Anna's eyes looked as dark and blue as the depths of the ocean, and _needy_. Elsa was sure that she herself had a similar look in her eye, because Anna started nibbling her own lip with a grin. Elsa had to force her hands not to travel to the storm between her legs. Her mouth was dry, and she couldn't hear anything. All she needed was sight and, more importantly, _touch._

And that she got. Her skin prickled as her sibling traced the sides of her nightgown. Ever so lightly at first, but by the time she was scratching Elsa's shoulder blades, she'd become more assertive with her touches. Elsa gasped, slammed her eyes shut, and bucked her hips forward, the bed falling from beneath her, leaving her to float in place. She clawed at the sheets to relieve some of the pressure boiling within, but to no avail.

Anna kept tracing her elder's contour, but this time starting a little lower down on her sister's body, nearing her hips. By this point, Elsa's nipples were hardening and she couldn't help but place one hand between her breasts to satisfy _some_ of her mental demands. She could _feel_ Anna's wry grin as she repeated the same action a third time, this time starting on Elsa's thighs, at the hem of her night gown. Elsa felt every little tickle, every scratch, every caress, every lick of _flames_ on her body as her gown was lifted up: past her thighs, above her hips, almost to her chest and-

It stopped, just shy of her breasts. Elsa's eyes snapped open, her only now realizing how out of breath she was and how much she needed to catch it for a moment. But she didn't _want_ to. She looked at Anna, dead in the eyes, her own face dripping with carnal desire.

Anna didn't speak, she didn't have to after glancing from Elsa to the nightgown. The elder immediately knew what was going on, and she didn't need words to answer, either. She smiled bodily at her younger sibling, who took the hint. Anna lifted her hands, undressing Elsa and discarding the garment.

She heard Anna gasp, and that made her _wild_ inside. And she looked at her sister, knowing her own chest was completely exposed. She felt shy, she felt the burning of a blush, but that was simply nothing to the conflagration billowing all over her body, concentrating in her womanhood, and melting her willpower. Such a wonderfully lecherous reaction was partially thrust on her by the very fact that she was exposed to Anna. She so often fantasized about it, and even those sparse times when she was in just in a _towel_ drove her and her libido crazy.

But now she was naked from the waist up, only her panties, and it was a thrill unmatched by anything prior, especially when coupled with Anna's now rapid breaths. Elsa realized that it might actually be too much when her sister grabbed her own gown. Elsa's breath hitched. Her heart pounded like a cannon as she hungrily traced the rising of Anna's clothing. She just about fainted when she saw the green panties. Elsa's own certainly had a wet spot, and Anna's did too.

Head still spinning, she eyed the lithe stomach before her, the lower ribs. Elsa sucked in a deep breath, only to find it stuck. Her brain was clogged, she could feel her arousal between her knees, the wetness dampening her inner thighs.

The bottom of Anna's night dress climbed higher, and as Elsa considered pinching herself to see if she was awake, the garment was discarded. She was left with a sight she'd imagined so many times in the past. A candle held nothing against a fire, just as Elsa's fantasies paled against the intensity of the real thing.

The freckles continued right down to Anna's sternum and lightly dusted her perky breasts. Even in the dim light, Elsa could tell that her sister's nipples were erect, and it sent her into overdrive. She _needed_ to do something, _needed_ something to happen.

Luckily, Anna only waited for a moment before moving in. She caged her elder in her limbs and slithered a hand up Elsa's lats. Her thumb eventually cupped the bottom of a voluptuous breast, sending sparks to her brain.

And suddenly, Anna's full hand was upon Elsa's chest, feeling the terrain and squeezing. Wide but lean hips bucked away from the sheets in response, the center of heated desire within Elsa melting and searing her skin.

Elsa's breath was fast. Anna's touch practically blistered Elsa's skin. Her back wouldn't relax, her entire body was wound up and tense. She bit her lip almost to the point of bleeding to try to reign herself in, but the wildness of her arousal kept bucking her around like an angry bull. Her mind was blank expect for the explosion of sensation ravishing her body. She felt almost like she was drowning, like her breath was getting farther and farther away, harder and harder to catch.

Elsa broke away, panting hard, she felt like she couldn't breathe. It must have just been too much. Her heart was palpable beating against her ribcage and her stomach buzzed with thousands of bees. She looked at her sister, still nude from the waist up, and saw stars.

"I'm sorry- I- you- we- and then- I-" the panting woman sputtered incoherently.

With solicitude, Anna quickly said "Elsa, Elsa, it's okay, it's okay, calm down," placing a gentle hand on a shaking shoulder. Then, with even more interest, and a hint of regret filled apprehension, Anna continued "did I do something? Did I go too far?"

Having had a short while, Elsa was more in control of herself, and could once again breathe, sort of. "No no no no no, I um," she blushed and looked away, "I just got a little um, _too_ excited."

Anna let out a dry laugh, the kind that was extra bouncy from the weight of lifted anxiety. "I think I was getting there, too, don't worry."

Elsa giggled and blushed a pure burn. In a diffident whisper, she suggested "m-maybe we can t-try again tomorrow?"

With a raised eyebrow, the younger said "try _that?_ On Christmas?" In mock hysteria. "I'd love to."

With a wide smile, fluttering heart, buzzing stomach, and now relaxing body, Elsa quipped "well I love _you._ "

"I love you too. You're my beautiful Blondie." Anna flopped down on her side, right next to Elsa and looked her in the eyes. "Now, let's get some sleep, I think we're both excited for tomorrow."

Elsa blushed and nodded in agreement. "Yes, I think we are." She let her eyes slide shut as Anna took her place with her head atop a now nude breast. Elsa was riveted by the immense skin to skin contact, let alone her expectations for Christmas. It was going to be amazing, like old times. A celebration, care free, love would be sifting through the air. Much of it was, too, that Elsa couldn't wait to give Anna her presents.

It took Elsa a long time to fall asleep with her mind re-running the previous hour or so. When she did, the last thought in her mind was about how perfect Christmas would be with her Anna.


	22. Presents and Rapunzel

Elsa hummed as pancakes sizzled on her skillet. Their arch smell fluttered into the air, forcing its way into her mind and causing her mouth to water heavily. They weren't just any pancakes. No, Elsa added a Christmas touch to them. She expounded plain batter with cocoa powder, a tad of sugar, and crushed peppermint, and the aroma it produced was absolutely heavenly- or should she say

Christmas-y?

Anna wasn't awake yet, but the elder decided that it'd be nice to have breakfast all ready when her soporific sister finally roused.

So, Elsa cooked to the tune of Jingle Bells with a silly grin on her face. Her heart fluttered like a butterfly's wings, and even passed her hunger, her stomach was alive, buzzing busily with hundreds of bees. She felt light on her feet, her movements were smooth and flowing as she flipped a pancake and removed another from the skillet. Excitement powered through her body like a storm. Today was going to be, well, a Christmas long overdue.

"Mmm, that smells good," a sleepy voice commented from the stairs. Elsa smiled at her sister. Anna was rubbing sleep out of both of her eyes, dressed in a green night gown now. Her hair was a wonderful flow of chaos, sticking up every which way and flanking her head with fiery arms and tails. She smacked her lips a few times. "What is it?"

"Pancakes," a mildly blushing and proud Elsa said.

"Pancakes? It smells like a chocolate factory in here!"

Elsa giggled. "Well maybe that's because I made them specially for you."

The red seeping into freckled cheeks was noticeable. Anna was now next to Elsa in the kitchen, grinning as wide as can be. "For me, huh? Chocolate pancakes," she mused out loud. "You just might be the best sister- girlfriend- both, I guess, ever!"

Elsa's heart bolted out of her chest. Girlfriend, she repeated in her mind. I like the sound of that. It sounded official. Sure, she didn't care that much to label it, but it was more secure seeming, almost like it put a layer of stability on their relationship. That likely stemmed from the fact that now she knew that's how secure Anna was in their relationship. In any case, Elsa readily approved of the terminology.

"I'm the best for the best," she finally responded.

Anna smiled at this. "So are they ready like now?"

"How impatient," Elsa chortled. "But yes, breakfast is quite ready."

The younger sibling just about squealed with joy. She leaned in quickly and placed a quick but forceful kiss on her elder's cheek, burning it red. When she pulled away, however, Anna didn't let herself farther than a few inches from Elsa's face, which earned her a raised eyebrow and a bemused smile. "By the way," Anna began, lower and in almost a husky tone, "Merry Christmas." She said it in just barely a whisper, letting her breath slide onto Elsa, who's skin shuddered and heart raced at the intimacy of the wish.

"Merry Christmas to you, t- mm." She was cut off by soft lips finding her own. She purred into the kiss and placed her arms tightly around her sibling.

When the two finished, Elsa returned her attention to breakfast. They ate, and Anna made some sort of comment with her mouth full. Based on the almost vociferous volume and wild arm gestures, Elsa concluded that it must have been a compliment on her cooking.

Breakfast was wonderful and all, but through the full meal, Elsa kept looking forward to what she knew was coming next: presents. Excitement didn't rise like the steady buzz of a bee hive to receive gifts, but rather to give them. She was certain of this because she hid Anna's first gift not too far away and fully intended on bestowing it as breakfast ended. And that she did. "Wait here," she said as she stood to get the wrapped parcel, bridling Anna's chance for retort.

Younger eyes lit up as they locked onto a rather large gift. With a slanted smile, Anna giggled "okay okay, but you're gonna have to open one right after."

Elsa shrugged, pretending to be unconscionably bored at the idea. "If you insist."

Anna gleefully rolled her eyes and shook her head. "That'll have to do."

With a smirk, the elder nodded. "Yes. Now, open it!" She handed her younger a medium sized box.

"I think you might be more excited for this than me," the redhead teased, grinning and peeling away the wrapping paper like a sloth.

Elsa bit her lower lip in a tight, enthusiastic grin. She nodded as her hands clamped together as if capturing the excitement of the moment between her palms and her stomach purred like a nervous cat.

Anna rolled her eyes playfully as she looked back down at her gift, now discarding the paper. She opened the box, and Elsa watched, giddy inside when she saw a little sparkle of magic brighten up her sister's eyes. The widened orbs stared for a moment, then Anna whispered "Whoa, Elsa, it's-" she cut herself off, standing back and draping the gown upon her body to guestimate how it looked on her. "it's beautiful! I just wish I could have worn it to our dance," she fantasized out loud.

A blush flooded pale cheeks. "I'm glad you like it," the elder responded.

Anna smirked. "Don't play dumb, you knew I'd like it."

Elsa returned the lopsided grin. "Yes I did. You are, after all, predictable."

A brown eyebrow raised high above teal eyes. "Predictable, huh? Were you thinking that last night, too?" Anna's inflection was confident. She already knew she'd won that battle of wits.

The room felt hot, and, recalling the previous evening, so did Elsa's womanhood. "Y-ye- um, okay, okay, you're not always predictable.

"Good," the younger said, keeping the ball in her sister's court, and driving it home hard, "because then tonight would be no fun."

Now, Elsa's eyes widened to the point of stretching. Her breath became dry and fast, and her heart skipped a couple beats, struggling to regain its regular rhythm. She fought to find words, but none would surrender. They held her tongue tight as she choked on them. "I..." She was silent for another few seconds before regaining herself. She realized, with a jolt of excitement and a pinch of trepidation, what she had to do next. "I have something for that," she retorted as huskily as she could, yanking out another box wrapped in colorful paper.

Anna looked utterly dumbfounded, staring with an agape mouth and eyes fluttering in astonishment. "You- wait what? You do? I mean, that's great but- but I, Elsa, you're too clever for you own good sometimes," she finally settled for, taking the box with a blush.

Elsa could hear her own heart beating as she grinned. Her stomach churned. She had a feeling Anna would like it by this point, but her mind was still riddled with doubt. She wanted to play it cool, but couldn't help explaining "it was a coincidence."

With a playful roll of her eyes, the younger girl quipped "well don't tell me that, silly goose."

"Fine," she elder relented, "I planned it all."

With a quick not of approval, Anna said "that's more like it," and turned her attention to the box. She tore it open and Elsa watched an eyebrow raise very high and red seep like a shadow onto her sibling's cheeks.

Elsa did her best not to faint.

"You- you actually did have something for that, huh?" It was more of a statement than a question as Anna pulled out the Christmassy underwear.

Elsa nodded, red as a tomato.

"They're- well, they're gorgeous and-" she made direct eye contact with her elder, lowering her voice and lathering it in sensuality- "sexy." With that, pink lips formed a steep smirk as Anna laid the set over her body, still looking right at Elsa.

Elsa was pretty sure that her heart was beating so fast that it popped or something. "Do you um- you do- do you like them?"

Anna nodded slowly. "Oh yes, yes I like them very much, but I'm more excited to see how much you like them on me."

Blue eyes nearly popped out of their skull. Elsa took a sharp, dry, and unsatisfying breath in as her knees began to wobble.

"But," then younger girl started, obviously having mercy for her elder, "that's an issue for tonight!" She rummaged behind herself and seemingly magically materialized a box with festive wrapping. "This, however, is something for right now," she stated proudly, extending the gift forward.

Elsa's vision became less spotty as her nerves slowed their rattling and she came out of under the landslide that their previous conversation piled on top of her. She gave familiar teal eyes one last excited glance as she took the offering, hands still shaking from Anna's teasing.

After she took a few moments, the elder finally put forth her focus onto the present in her hands. She grinned, her shaking stomach now giving way to jittery excitement.

The tearing sound rippled in the air and Elsa uncovered a box. It was fairly light, and she couldn't elicit much of a noise by giving it a little shake. Elsa's mind began to race, frantically seeing if she could guess the contents before she opened it. It wasn't a branded box with pictures of anything on it, it was just a plain old brown box. "Okay that's enough staring, open it!" Anna's voice startled Elsa.

Giggling, the woman in the spotlight plucked at the tape holding the package. She quickly uncovered a small assortment of items. First, she found the shoes, light blue sneakers that looked quite comfortable; then she saw the headphones. Little ones, again, very comfortable looking, but this time darker blue. They matched nicely with the sneakers.

Elsa paused, furrowing her brows at the odd two gifts until she was interrupted by "keep going!"

Unable to help a tug at the corner of her mouth, Elsa dug through a mass of tissue paper. She pulled something out, heart skipping a beat when she saw that it was a rather nice Kindle. Elsa's mind felt a little numb as she processed the expense- and extent- of this gift. Her mouth moved mutely for a few moments as her heart burned with the almost painful glow of love for her darling. After a time of choking down the gift, Elsa managed an appropriately sarcastic comment. "So you're saying I need to start exercising?"

Anna giggled and rolled her eyes in mirth. "No, silly, I just thought it'd be nice for you to walk around, enjoying nature while you listen to some audiobooks, paperbacks are so last year." She added the last part with a dose of exaggeration and a wink, definitely aiming to tease Elsa's love of reading books.

All in all, the elder decided almost immediately, this was a prefect gift. She'd not even thought about getting audiobooks, and the prospect of walking and listening to them made her ecstatic! "Anna, I- I don't know what to say- I love you," she gushed.

Elsa was so busy musing over the gift and basking in the respondent "I love you too," that she completely blanked on the fact that she had another present for her dear sister for several minutes.

"Oh wait, Anna," she said, breaking the silence between them and bursting into action. "I have one more thing for you." She produced a tiny, elegantly wrapped box with ruby red paper and golden ribbons around it.

Anna gingerly took it, mouth hanging open in a grin, preparing to flap and make some sort of noise, but Elsa interrupted her. It's- It's um, not as good as yours," she said diffidently to the floor.

"Elsa," the younger said almost scoldingly, "I don't know what it is yet, but I know you, and I know nothing you'd get me can be anything less than perfect." The comment was somewhat playful, but was feathered with a certain kind of deadpan honesty.

Rich, red lips twitched into a grin. "Just open it, you kowtowing goose."

"I live to serve," Anna poshly stated, bowing slightly as she began tearing the paper.

In no time, she had nearly revealed the precious core within protective layers, and Elsa held her breath. In just those few seconds, she managed an hour's worth of over-thinking. She worried that Anna would find it stupid or cheesy. Elsa became self-conscious, hiding behind her braid for the first time in a long while.

But it was too late to take it back, for the younger girl was pulling the locket out right at that moment. Her teal eyes were wide, glimmering like gold in the sun, and her face was lifted into a mesmerized grin.

"Oh my God, Elsa, this is- these are gorgeous," she exclaimed as a dainty finger traced the tiny but ornate carved inlays of the locket and the contour of the delicate key.

A blush rushed upon porcelain cheeks and relief and vivid joy accompanied it.

"I love it, but um, but why the key?" The strawberry blonde was examining the little trinket closely, quickly fitting it into the keyhole. So she'd figured out what it does, but not why Elsa chose a locket and key of all things.

Elsa took a deep breath. "It's um," she began self consciously, "it's you." Fingers laced in her own silky, thick braid, the elder sister took a small, defensive step back. She knew Anna wouldn't laugh, but that didn't expunge her from the whining pit of embarrassment sinking in her stomach.

An eyebrow raised. "It's me?" Anna enunciated extra to pronounce her confusion.

"Mhm," Elsa nodded, face warming like it was underneath the summer sun. "You see, when um- before, when I was stuck inside I sort of, well I imagined using a key to open up the front door, and that'd lead me to happiness."

Testing a glance at her sister, Elsa found that Anna looked utterly confused, but remained intent on understanding. There was no giggling, not even a twitch at the mouth. She was taking this seriously, and that helped smooth over the feeling grinding Elsa's gut. Anna did, however, see the need to snap the tension farther. "Yes, that's generally how people open doors, Elsa."

With a strained, half suppressed chortle, Elsa said "Indeed, but this was different." She met her love's teal eyes, which were still focused, if not looser than before. "It was a the phobia locking me in, not a physical lock. I had decided that to be happy I needed two things. The first was to just overcome my phobia." Elsa took a deep breath, she realized she'd said all of that without pauses. So she very purposefully took a reprieve and locked with her sister's eyes. "Not only did I need you for that but, but the other thing I needed, well it was you." For the first time in quite a while, Elsa felt exposed in front of her Anna.

A few silent, drawn out moments of consideration passed. They felt like rubber bands, stretching farther and farther, and becoming more and more tense as they did so. Elsa began to physically retreat a step, shielding herself with her hair, much like a child would with a blanket.

That is, until Anna spoke. With a smirk, she commented "that was a very roundabout way to say that I make you happy," Then raising the necklaces for consideration.

Elsa's cheeks felt like licks of flame.

"But it makes sense."

Muscles that the elder hadn't even realized were still tensed became laxed.

"And," the bubbly sibling continued, "this might just be the most thoughtful gift I've ever received, and it means a lot." She was pointedly serious, especially rounding the end of her statement, the kind of directness that made Elsa's heart flutter. Anna placed the locket around her neck.

"I- I'm glad you like it."

Warm, pink lips grinned. Anna closed the gap between them, stopping only when she was very near her sister. She raised the key in the air. "And I think you should wear this one." The seemingly only stopped to take in her elder's confused expression, not waiting for any vocal inquiry. "Because you're my key to happiness, for lack of a better term."

Elsa melted slightly inside, and her knees did, too. Gentle hands guided the necklace into place. Elsa mumbled "that's exactly what I used to call it."

With a teasing smile, Anna whispered "I know you so well."

Elsa giggled. "Yes you do."

* * *

"Okay Elsa, are you ready to go?" Anna stood by the front door, holding it cracked open.

Elsa took a deep breath. Her insides rattled, unable to sit still in the maw of anxiety clouding her mind. Her skin was flushed with nervousness as she unsteadily exhaled. She reminded herself of what Anna pointed out the previous evening. I am ready to talk to Rapunzel. "Yes, let's go."

"Okay." The fiery red head, now dressed in a Christmas sweater that was supposed to be ugly, but looked quite dashing on Anna, swung the door open, allowing her elder to pass through the portal first.

Elsa did so, and as she passed the threshold into the flurrying, sharply cold Christmas air, she felt Anna place a hand firmly on her back, stabilizing the unsteady gait of her heart just as it was climaxing. Elsa wondered if Anna knew. If she was aware that right then, no earlier and no later, Elsa needed the contact, or if it was merely coincidence. She decided that it wasn't a mistake.

The car ride was turbulent. Or at least Elsa's mind was during it. Anna held her hand the entire way, which was a much appreciated, and probably needed anchor point in the confusing winds of Elsa's mind.

In just a short drive, they pulled in. It was absolutely arcane to Elsa as she stepped out of the car, being the one to arrive at her friend's place, not vise verse. She felt unsteady on her feet, the oddity of her situation sinking in slowly like water into a sponge. It'd been years, so many that she totally forgot that she used to do such a thing: go to Rapunzel's house. What made her feeling even weirder was the nostalgic sense of homeliness she felt when looking at the face of the house. She'd spent countless hours here, talking to Rapunzel and Anna, feeling as securely at home as in her own abode.

But not today. She felt like she wasn't quite welcome, for some strange reason. Maybe it was the length of time she'd been away, or the circumstances of her visit.

Elsa closed her eyes and focused on a deep breath. She found Anna's hand with her own once she re-introduced sight to her senses. "Okay," Anna said, "let's go." Not pushy or rushed, just suggestive enough to get Elsa's legs working.

Work they did. Before she knew it, before she was ready for it, they were at the front door. The siblings made eye contact, and after a moment Elsa produced a determined nod. Anna was right, she was ready for this, she just had to prove it to herself. The doorbell rang, the noise seemingly kicking her heart with a steel toed boot. Elsa caught her elusive breath.

The next few seconds were stretched out, expanding far beyond their natural breadth. A thud came from inside the house, to mirror the reckless beating of Elsa's heart. She just repeated to herself I'm ready for this, I'm ready for this, while squeezing her Anna's hand. This earned a soft pat on the back and a whispered "you're doing great, Elsa. It'll be good to see her," which soothed like ice on a burn.

The footsteps were at the door, and Elsa only had a moment to beg herself not to faint before it swung open.

There stood Rapunzel. Grinning, freckled, in an ugly Christmas sweater. Right there was the girl that Elsa tried so hard to love. And before Elsa could even muster up the strength to say hello, those green eyes in front of her met her own and went as wide as softballs.

"Elsa! You- you're here, but you- you-" she turned to Anna. "She's," she exclaimed, pointing at Elsa then looking back at her, "here! You're here! Anna, this is so much more than just a surprise!" Rapunzel bounced on her feet as she realized this.

Just like that, the thick ice between them was broken, and the eldest didn't feel nearly as uncomfortable with this. In fact, she giggled a little bit at how excited Rapunzel was becoming. It was like watching a dog see the mail truck arrive. "Yes," Elsa agreed, "I'm here."

Before Elsa really had any time to react, she was being squeezed like a stress ball from every angle. The buzz of being hugged by Rapunzel flickered with familiarity as she recalled what it felt like when they were dating.

But this felt cozy. Not sensual or needy, not like when they were together. This felt like a best friend being excited for her best friend. Elsa grinned almost placidly, relaxing as their relationship began to slide back in place, like snow down a mountain. She whispered gently "I've missed you, Rapunzel," without even realizing she was speaking. It was natural and true. She missed her friend so dearly, and that weighty realization was now, as she finally got her back, pouring over her like rampant rain. It made her throat feel lumpy and her eyes water.

Rapunzel pulled to be at arm's length. "Awe, Elsa, I've missed you too." The green eyes before Elsa were strained, but Rapunzel's lips were smiling surely. "Now," she announced suddenly and loudly, turning to include Anna in the upcoming demand. "Don't you two just stand out here in the cold, come in, I think you owe me and explanation." She gestured at Elsa to make her curiosity clear.

"Yes, I think we do," Anna agreed. But much to Elsa's befuddlement, her sibling sounded... nervous? No, that' can't be right. Jealousy was another option that crossed Elsa's mind, but she had seen Anna jealous, and this was not it. Elsa pushed it to the back of her mind and followed her sister inside.

Before Elsa knew it, they were all sitting on the couch with hot cocoa in hand. Rapunzel's house was decorated for the season as well. It felt like a cozy getaway in a crazy winter storm. Elsa let the heat from her mug seep into her fingertips, snaking pleasantly deeper into her body as she naturally leaned against Anna. She took a moment to appreciate the magnanimous welcome she'd received.

"When?" Rapunzel demanded with a Mcgonagall-like scold to her voice and leaning forward in interest.

"A few weeks ago," Anna calmly responded.

"Okay, okay," Rapunzel bounced in place, shaking her hands to let out some of her excess thrill. "How? I mean, Elsa, you're strong, but this was so- so sudden! How'd you do it?"

The air thickened and the room no longer felt cozy, but rather strangling. Elsa sat still as a statue once put under the spotlight. She remained stunned as the memory of how she overcame her phobia flooded through her. The fear of rejection after kissing her sister. She couldn't tell Rapunzel that, could she? Heart beating at the bars of its cage, Elsa looked at Anna for support. "I..."

"She um," Anna tried to help, "you see, it's actually a really funny story. "Elsa was- Elsa was stressed about something," she sent a little, wry grin at her elder, "and she kinda forgot where she was." Anna then faked a laugh.

Rapunzel leaned in farther, if at all possible. "What made you that scared!? Oh my god, did your dad do something!?"

Anna looked anxiously at Elsa while the latter squirmed in her seat. Her heart was thudding in her throat, and talking felt like choking. As for the younger, she looked like she was begging to say something, asking permission.

And there was only one thing she'd be asking about. Elsa's eyes bulged in horror. Resolute terror. Her dear sister wanted to tell Rapunzel about them. That must be why she looked nervous earlier!

"No," she silently and urgently shot back to Anna with a quick, curt shake of her head.

"Okay, okay, too far," Rapunzel broke the tension that she could obviously feel. "You don't have to answer, it's okay, Elsa." There again was another reason, previously lost in memory, that Elsa missed her best friend. Because Rapunzel, although ever-curious and hungry for knowledge, would set aside her desire for the sake of Elsa's comfort. Every time. It felt like stones tumbling from her shoulders.

Anna butted in, thankfully. Placing her hand firmly on her sibling's knee, she assured "we'll tell you when Elsa's ready, okay?" To Rapunzel.

The golden blonde nodded in approval, but Elsa didn't pay much attention to that. She was busy hanging on and probably over-analyzing Anna's last words. When I'm ready? Did that mean Anna's ready? Maybe it was to imply that Anna was okay with telling Rapunzel about their more than sisterly interactions, even if she herself wasn't quite ready yet. Elsa tried not to dwell on this, but she couldn't avoid it. Like a whirlpool, it slowly stirred her back in every time she started to drift away.

Luckily, she wasn't left long to her musings. "I think that's a yes for her," she heard her sister say in a teasing voice.

The room flickered as Elsa blinked her eyes rapidly to regain her position in the conversation. "A- a yes to what?" She looked at Anna, who silently differed her to Rapunzel.

Smiling green eyes looked back. "Hot chocolate, silly, I'm getting you some." She smirked.

Blushing a little, but not entirely uncomfortable, Elsa looked away and said "oh, then yes, that's a definite yes." It's not like Rapunzel wasn't familiar with the ice blonde occasionally spacing out, anyway.

"That's what I thought," their friend said victoriously, bounding from her seat. Elsa was left sitting alone with Anna. They remained silent, and the atmosphere was relaxed. She let herself bask in the hot tub of rekindled friendship and pondered how much she'd missed Rapunzel. It made Elsa feel… at peace, finally.

She looked at Anna and smiled, their lips not two feet apart. "You were right. This was a good idea."

In fact, she was having such a picture perfect Christmas, that she barely even thought to wonder where her father had been all day.


	23. Daddy Issues

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just the epilogue after this ;)

Christmas day was wearing on, and Elsa and Anna couldn't take of _all_ of Rapunzel's time. There had to be, obviously, time set aside for the blonde to spend with her family. So, they were finally getting back to the car.

The sun was setting, casting a warm, orange glow across the frigid land, and making Elsa's breath look like a dragon's. Goosebumps prickled across her arms as she arrived at the passenger side door with a particular spring in her step, and the coolness of the air almost tasted sweet, just for her.

She hummed as she climbed into the car and slid her cold hands into Anna's warm ones. A simplistic "thank you" was all she needed to say to convey her entire point.

A confident and casual "I'm the best," made Elsa chuckle as they drove off.

Not much longer, they arrived home. As they pulled into the driveway, Elsa laid eyes on her father's car. Just the sight seemed to sucker punch her, tightening her chest.

"Well," Anna said, nibbling her own lip, "looks like dad's home." She looked at Elsa, a concerned expression displaying within the crease of her eyebrows. Elsa only had time to nod before her sister kept talking. "He's probably already locked himself in his room." Her tone was erring on bitterness, but also seemed to be mixed with a softness that Elsa could use as comfort.

"Y-yeah, you're probably right."

Anna visibly clenched her teeth. "He hasn't been working very hard for someone who _wants_ to reconnect _._ " Elsa thought back briefly to when their father suggested something like that, during his biggest argument with Anna yet. Since then, she could put her finger on one time he actually tried talking to them, but does just saying "hi" to them when he walked in late again really count?

Elsa could clearly see the contours of anger and hopelessness in her little sister's face. Her eyes gleamed with it. She could at least ignore her father's lack of connection, because she was used to it. Even when he'd discovered her sexuality, or when he'd found out she could leave the house now, their conversations were curt. For Elsa, that was part of everyday life for the past several years. For a long time, it was for Anna, too. What the elder could not ignore, however, was the seed of hope he had planted in her sweet, caring, and forever hopeful little sister's mind. The seed he refused to water or watch after. And as it died, it was killing Anna inside, that much was apparent. So Elsa could feel her blood running hot with anger towards him, her heart working itself up; solely for the way he'd tortured Anna.

Elsa wondered briefly if he was capable of change. "W-well maybe he won't i-ignore us today." Elsa didn't want to get her sister's hopes up, but there wasn't much else she could say.

Anna looked at her, taking a sharp breath. "I swear, if on Christmas of all days he's not willing to try, I'm done."

That was the first time that Anna had hinted at giving up all on her own. Before, it was because she had puppet master Hans pulling her strings. Now, however, it was her and her alone. An almost completely new side of the young red head, but not a fault. Everyone has their limits, and in regards to her father, Elsa reached hers long ago. She didn't want Anna to have to continue suffering with no dad, but Elsa would shed no tears if he were no longer in her own life. She pursed her lips, stuck between a rock and a hard place. She took Anna's hand. "We'll go in when you're ready."

Anna closed her eyes, calming herself down. When her breaths were even, she opened them once more. "Okay, okay," she nodded, "I'm ready." They both started for their respective car doors, but before either could get out, the younger sibling commented "Oh, and Elsa," planting a quick kiss on a rosy cheek. "Thank you."

Elsa smiled warmly, taking it in stride. "Of course." _For what, exactly? You did all the talking, Anna._

The walk to the front door felt like a dramatic build up. Elsa could almost _hear_ the orchestral and percussive wailing, and her heart might as well have been a drum. She didn't know what she wanted as they opened the door. Selfishly, she desired her father to be locked away, out of sight, and out of mind. Selflessly, however, she wished he'd be waiting there for them, or at least waiting for Anna.

Her answer was impatiently waiting. As the two walked in, Elsa glanced around. Her eyes fell upon the couch, where two heads were just turning around. One was her father's, and one was a woman she didn't recognize. Elsa furrowed her brow and looked at Anna, who also looked confused.

"Girls," their father said, standing before they could do anything else. So they stood there, not knowing what to do, as he approached. "I want you both to meet someone."

Elsa sized up the woman now standing next to her dad. She was pretty, blatantly so. She had the same hair color as their mother did, chestnut brown, and was built similarly: petite. She did, however, have brown eyes that complimented her tamed but wavy hair. Elsa felt a weird, empty feeling begin to gnaw away at the pit of her stomach. Her hands anxiously found her sister's. She knew what was going on.

"Anna, Elsa, this is my girlfriend, Megara." The only man in the room was gesturing to each of his daughters as he spoke, then to the new woman, his free hand placed upon her back.

Megara stepped forward, outstretching her hand to Elsa first. She reluctantly relinquished Anna's extremity and met the handshake. The lady's hand was warm, but not as soft as their mother's used to be. "It's nice to meet you, Elsa." She smiled _politely_ before moving on to Anna.

The handshake was repeated, but this time the lady said "it's very nice to meet you, Anna, I've heard so much about you."

Elsa frowned. _Dad makes it very clear who his favorite is._ Or maybe Elsa was just overthinking the situation. She let the uncertainty fester within, broiled in bitterness. She'd thought that her father had started to care before, but was that all just an act? "It's nice to meet you, too," she let Anna say for both of them.

"We've um, we've been seeing each other for a little while." Based solely on physical appearances, it looked to Elsa like he was trying to replace their mother. She kept her observation on the down low, however, for Anna's sake. How could that woman be with him? Knowing what he'd done to Elsa, how he'd left his own _daughters_ to fend for themselves? She _had_ to know he turned into a neglectful monster, right? That he didn't even _care_ if Elsa ever recovered. Elsa couldn't help but feel upset.

Anna, on the other hand, actually seemed genuinely happy. That made sense, though. They weren't being outright avoided, and that definitely meant a lot to the younger girl. She engaged in small talk with the new woman and it all seemed pleasant. That being said, Elsa definitely let her sister do most of the talking, and pay most of the attention, for that matter. If her father clearly favored Anna, why should Elsa fancy talking? All she did was remain polite.

They all found themselves sitting in the living room talking, getting to know one another. Elsa and Anna sat thigh to thigh, but nothing more than sisterly. It started as generic small talk: how the older couple met, their favorite parts of Christmas, and favorite desserts, hobbies, and Elsa really didn't care to keep listening, as she had only been asked one question thus far. "What do you like to do?" Meg pointed her attention to the platinum blonde.

"I um, I like to read," she truthfully answered. "Mostly fantasy stories," she added, allowing her to actually display a small part of her personality. Just because she wasn't all that interested in talking didn't mean she should be curt.

Her lips naturally curled up when Anna started rambling "you should see how many books she goes through, I mean, sometimes it feels like we're finding her a new book every single day."

The woman chuckled "I sure wish I still had the time to read like that. It's always nice to escape into a good book."

Elsa actually felt her heart flutter for a moment. "Yes," she agreed, "it really is."

Megara continued focusing on the elder sibling, making her feel _included._ "So you read, and if what Anna said earlier is true," she gave the redhead a teasing look, "you're quite the mathematician. Have you looked into graduate programs?"

Being caught a little off-guard, Elsa took a second to organize herself before looking like a fool. This woman was gregarious and _actually_ interested in her life. Not to mention tactfully and politely avoiding talking about her phobia. Maybe she misjudged her. Her earlier question still stood, though. _How can she date him knowing what he's done to us?_

"A few, yes, but I don't- I don't know yet." She glanced at Anna.

The woman nodded. "That's understandable, it's a big life decision. I took a year off before going back to school, just to be sure that's what I wanted to do."

Elsa smiled. "Yeah, I might do that."

After nodded approvingly, Megara turned to the younger of the siblings. "And Anna," she segwayed, "is there anyone significant in your life? Any boyfriends or girlfriends?" Elsa's eyes went wide. She must have talked about Anna's schooling before, because that was _not_ at all the same kind of question she asked Elsa.

Face red as a tomato, the younger sister looked at her own significant other. She had sort of a mischievous look that made Elsa's heart stammer and struggle for normalcy. For a split second, she thought Anna was going to spill the beans. "No, not um, not right now. It's just me, yep, just little old me." Again, she gave a passing look Elsa's way.

"There's no rush, you're young, I'm sure you'll find someone who's right for you." She turned to Elsa. "How about you, Elsa? Any boyfriends? You're quite a pretty woman." There lay the answer. She was told Anna was bisexual, but nothing about the elder.

She didn't know what to say. That opened up a whole new world of possibilities. Meg seemed genuine and caring, despite Elsa's first judgement of her. And now she wondered if her father even mentioned _anything_ about her. Maybe this woman wasn't dating him _despite_ what he'd done, maybe she was blissfully unaware.

Fortunately, Elsa didn't have to talk first. Anna's voice was skeptical and indignant. Even her eyebrows were pressed together in seriousness. "How much did _our_ dad tell you about Elsa, exactly?"

The woman looked unprepared and concerned. She looked over at her date, eyebrows furrowed. Their father, in turn, looked like he'd been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "Not much," she said, chewing the inside of her cheek, "just that she's very shy, really."

Anna audibly scoffed, blatantly agitated. She bit her lip hard, putting her arm protectively around Elsa. Her voice was strained, and her eyes were watering slightly. She visually mirrored how Elsa felt inside. "Dad," she demanded, her voice low and inimical. "How? How could you just _erase_ Elsa?"

Megara interrupted the busted man's gibberish. "Wait, what? What does she mean, Agnarr?"

Anna just stared in disbelief for a few moments. Elsa felt suddenly and jarringly self-conscious as all thoughts and curiosities turned to her enigma of a life. She hugged herself. "How the _Hell_ do you expect to reconnect if you _still_ ignore Elsa!?"

" _What_ is she _talking_ about!?"

The father shifted in discomfort, blinking his widened eyes several times. His forehead glistened. At the same time as feeling slightly under pressure, Elsa felt a bolster from her sister's, and even this new woman's, defensiveness.

"I- I can- I can explain, it's just- it's"

"No," Anna interrupted, standing and waving off his pleas, "stop. I thought we were passed this." Her voice wasn't angry. Rather, it was trepid with the weight of disappointment, who's heaviness also acted on her neck and hung her head low. Tears were audible in her tenor. All eyes on the youngest of the group, she clasped her darling's hand and spat "come on, Elsa. They have a lot to talk about." She turned and made deliberate eye contact with her father, making sure to fill her vision with malice and hurt that he'd struck her with.

Elsa was not at all opposed to leaving the room, willingly tailgating Anna upstairs with their fingers tightly tangled together.

The younger wasted no time marching right into her elder's room and flopping face first onto the bed. Elsa pursed her lips, closed the door, and sat next to her sister's face-down form. She rested her hand on Anna's back, who mumbled into the mattress. "I- I can't believe him, it, this _whole thing._ " Anna sniffled.

Rubbing Anna's back, Elsa quietly muttered "I know" in as soft and cradling of a voice as she could.

Anna suddenly sat straight upright, winding up right next to her sister. "I just I really- I thought like, hey, he's finally reconnecting, and I- I believed it, I believed he was reaching out to _us._ "

The cracking and defeated softness in Anna's voice made Elsa's face strain as she held back any tears.

" _God,_ I'm so stupid!"

"No, no, Anna," Elsa rushed forcing eye contact. "You're not." Her heart felt kind of like a wet rag plopped in her chest. "I- I thought that m- maybe he changed, too." She looked down timidly. "And I actually liked Meg."

The creases in the normally bubbly girl's forehead betrayed heartache, both vicarious and internal. "I did too, she just seems so caring."

"Yeah," Elsa nodded. "I was w- wondering, h- how someone so sweet could look past everything that h- he did." Her voice was strained now, trudging through her throat. scratching and uncooperative.

"And now it makes sense," Anna commented almost inaudibly.

Moving her head in agreement, the elder let silence slip between them, only partially broken by the rumbling of Meg's distant voice. The quietude stayed, extending its welcome like a disagreeable guest. Soon, it felt like an intruder in their room, but neither girl knew what to say, so they let it hang heavily there.

Until they heard audible noises from downstairs, that is. "How could you _not_ tell me that?!"

Farther voices were there, but the words were garbled in the walls, unintelligible. And then they quieted to inaudible altogether. Anna sighed. "He's gonna get away with it." There was no hesitation or doubt in her words. She spoke with an air of confidence and defeat at the same time.

Elsa pursed her lips tightly. Her sister's words felt sort of like a slap to the face. "Maybe he won't," she simply countered.

Looking and sounding as bitter as a grapefruit, Anna retorted. "You know just as well as me that he's gonna make up some _lies_ and win Meg over. He's gonna trick her. After all, that's what he does. He tricks people." Elsa knew the last part wasn't about Meg, and it stung to see her sister bereft like that.

She was right, though. Their father had consistently lied and hidden things for at least five years now. Why would he change his game plan all of the sudden? With the truth backing her into a corner, Elsa's mind slithered into the first option it could find. "W-we could t-tell her our side. L-let her decide what to do." Elsa hugged herself.

This silenced the younger for several seconds. Elsa's breath felt baited. The pause was so strained and gratingly drawn out that the elder began to wonder if her sibling would even respond. There was clearly something happening behind Anna's eyes. Doubt even began to leak into Elsa's mind. _Did I go too far?_

"We could," the younger finally whispered, her voice hoarse. "But would that be the right thing to do?"

This gave Elsa pause. She tried her best, in her mind, to weigh all of the variables, but this was an equation she just couldn't seem to balance. "M-maybe, I mean, Meg deserves to k-know who she's with, right?"

Anna nodded in thought. She, too, looked like she was mentally straining for a definitive answer. "B-but now?"

"What do you mean?"

Continuing, the younger shifted uncomfortably. "I mean, if we tell her soon, she's going to break up with our dad." An expectant look fell upon Elsa.

"It's right for her to know _who_ she's with," Elsa declared, unsure of where her sister was going, but her position beginning to cement in her own mind.

"Yeah, but, well, what if she found out later? Like, say we waited a few months and told her, would she still break up with him?" Anna sounded conflicted, like a mouse trying to find a way out of a trap.

But she had a point. Elsa had no immediate response.

"So if we told her now, would we be ruining dad's and _her_ happiness?" As the question marinated in the elder's mind, a growing pit clogged her stomach.

"Does it matter?" Elsa nearly spat it with the tears breaking her voice and threatening to fracture her vision. "After everything he's done to me? To _us_?" She was standing now, and she didn't even realize it. Painfully jabbing her own chest while she answered to Anna's face, and burning off some anxiety by pacing directly after.

Anna rubbed her eyes, then hung her head downward as she thought. Her mouth moved several times, as if practicing for speech but losing its sound. At last, the stressed red head said "I don't know," eking above the audible threshold.

Elsa continued pacing. "Do you really care if he's happy? He's hurt _both_ of us so many times, Anna, I- I don't- I- I just don't care." A stonewall of realization stopped the elder in her tracks as she spoke. She really didn't care, not anymore.

"I don't know!" Anna said, this time adding more audible and visual reinforcement by raising her voice and standing antithetical to Elsa. "But does that really give us the right to ruin it?" Her voice was not loud, but not soft. It was stark and commanding, albeit hushed.

"Anna, it's right to tell her!" Elsa was surprised at how raised and pleaded her voice came across. It felt thick in her throat. "Shouldn't she know what she's getting into?"

Though the youngest seemed to consider this for a moment, she reiterated an earlier point. "But not necessarily up front, people keep secrets! And- and telling her now would be _sabotage_ , Elsa."

Anna had a point, and Elsa couldn't stop that observation from stabbing into her thoughts. It cracked her own presupposition and let doubt infiltrate her argument.

"But you're right," came a now much softer, lower, and cradling voice from her lover. "She deserves to know. But does it really have to be now?"

Now, it was Elsa's turn. "I- I don't know," she defeatedly admitted.

"Plus," Anna whispered, placing her warm hand gently on Elsa's freckled cheek, her own glistening with just the suggestion that tears were there moments ago. "Like you said, who cares?"

"Wait, what?" Elsa blinked several times. Her heart felt oddly still, but at the same time stressed. The silence ensuing from the implication of Anna's words was deafening, and Elsa swore she lost her ability to feel any sensation upon her skin. At least for a moment.

Anna stepped back and shook her head at the floor. "I- I just- well I just don't know if I want to keep playing this game with him." She made meek eye contact with her sister, like a lost puppy. "Especially after, well you know, after tonight. After he showed he's never really going to try, he's gonna keep ignoring you and lying to me." She looked back up. Elsa was still frozen. "He had his chance. Lots of them, actually, so I don't know if it's worth caring anymore."

The rush of conflicting emotions that followed was incomprehensible to Elsa. She wanted to cry, laugh, whine, cheer, smile, hug, and step back to think all at once. She needed- she needed- she didn't know. Her eyes were burning with tears, but her cheeks were almost sore from how widely she was smiling. Her heart dribbled sadness for Anna's severed connection, but beat whimsically that they both agreed on moving on. Her stomach- well that just felt like an angry sack of butterflies.

A whimper escaped her mouth as she fell, catching her arms around her sister. "Oh Anna, _my_ Anna, I- I- I love you so much." She looked at her sister's face to find the visage singed with just as many fighting emotions as her own.

"I love you too, Elsa, more than anything else. And- and I need you to help me move on."

That felt like a cotton wad forced into her throat, but it was welcome. "I'll be here every step of the way," she nearly cried.

Anna buried her tear stain and hair covered head on her older sister's upper chest, clutching tightly. It took Elsa a long time to figure out that she wouldn't ever have all the answers, and neither would anyone else. Life isn't gift wrapped for anyone, and sometimes the only solution to a problem was to simply leave, to go and move on, to make your own life.

And that's exactly what Elsa and Anna had to do now.


	24. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You may notice something suspicious in this chapter: Rapunzel is dating Eugene. I know it doesn't line up with the earliest chapters, but honestly I just kinda forgot because it was like 2 years between writing chapter 23 and chapter 24, plus Rapunzel and Eugene is an amazing couple.
> 
> Sorry! I hope that doesn't ruin the immersion for anyone :P It was really just an honest mistake from a forgetful mind, and pairing Rapunzel with someone else just doesn't feel right, so I didn't fix it.

"Ready?" Anna stood before the front door, looking back at Elsa with a bright green backpack absolutely stuffed with anything and everything she could cram into it. She wore jeans, something Elsa loved on her, and her classic braids. In her hand was a big rolling suitcase, also stuffed like a clown-car.

Elsa nodded. "Ready," she confirmed.

The younger opened up the door, August heat swept inside. On the driveway, Rapunzel honked and waved excitedly, her car piled high with Elsa and Anna's personal belongings. Their car was, too, of course. _Just like Tetris,_ Elsa had thought after cramming the last of the luggage into the vehicles, somehow fitting her and her sister's entire lives into two small cars.

"I still don't understand why it was such a big deal to get it all in one trip, it's only like twenty minutes away" Anna mused out loud. At Elsa's request, and Anna's agreement, they'd chosen a place close to home. She wasn't sure she was ready to take a full leap just yet, despite how often she'd opt to read outside or work on homework at a local cafe while her sister sipped a hot chocolate and kept her company.

"Because," Rapunzel demanded loudly, "it's so much more official this way! How uncool would it be if you guys left, and two hours later were back like 'oh yeah and this and this, kay bye'?"

Anna rolled her eyes. "More officially dramatic, maybe."

"It should be dramatic!" Rapunzel wore a pink shirt and black shorts. "You're moving out!" She squealed. "Elsa! Anna! This is so exciting!" She'd still not seen their apartment- well, _they'd_ barely seen it either, just a tour of a similar model.

The elder sister was smiling dopily, lacing fingers with her lover. "It _is_ quite exciting, Anna."

Simply rolling her eyes and turning, Anna placed a kiss right square on Elsa's lips. "If you say so." Her words may have denied it, but her tone betrayed her own excitement.

Rapunzel wore a lopsided grin, green eyes concerned yet warm. "I'm never gonna get used to that, you know."

Anna blushed, hiding a chortle with her hand. Elsa averted her gaze, cheeks ablaze. "Sorry," they squeaked.

"Don't stop on account of me, just know that if you get too caught up in it and start doing the Nasty, I reserve my rights to smack you with a frying pan."

"Rapunzel!" Elsa smacked her best friend's hand lightly, flushing even more. She looked at Anna, chewing her lip. She was smirking back and winked. They hadn't done any of _that_ since last night. It was only about noon, but now that Elsa was thinking about it…

Mischievously, the strawberry blonde looked between the other two. "Rapunzel, do you mind waiting out here for, oh I dunno, an hour or so? Me and Elsa have some _business_ we'd like to go attend to," she joked, but also maybe wasn't joking.

Before Elsa could be embarrassed, their friend _very_ loudly countered "Oh no no no no, absolutely not, not now, you're _not_ making me wait for that. You'll have plenty of time for breaking in your new place tonight." She winked and jabbed Elsa in the shoulder.

Was it possible to melt? It was quite hot, after all, and Elsa was pretty sure she was melting. She looked at Anna, who was biting her lip and wiggling her eyebrows at her elder. Laughing out loud at the sight, she gasped "not as long as Anna keeps making _that_ face at me."

The redhead pouted. "Hey! That's not nice."

Elsa grinned malevolently "now _that_ face, that's one I could-"

"OHHkay!" Rapunzel herded them like sheep. "Let's get going, we've got a lot of unpacking to do!"

Elsa sat with Rapunzel, they hadn't been able to catch up in quite some time. In person, that is. She'd just been so busy, interviewing for graduate programs, visiting schools, looking for apartments, starting to pack up for her and Anna (not to mention lots of kissing Anna)- time just seemed to keep slipping away from her. Not that Rapunzel minded. On the contrary, she was quite content to give them a little space- she'd needed some when Elsa and Anna finally told her they were _together_ together, after all. So, Elsa summarized, it'd all worked out well.

Despite taking the news graciously- and with no small amount of vocal disbelief- Rapunzel needed to reconcile the idea. She still talked with Elsa during this time, but they didn't see each other in person, and they all three certainly didn't hang out. Almost out of the blue, while Elsa was touching up her interview answers, Rapunzel had called.

" _So she makes you happy. Like really, truly happy?"_

" _Yes," Elsa had said honestly._

" _And you make her happy?"_

_Elsa nodded. Then realized she was on the phone and mentally facepalmed. "Y- I- Yes."_

_There was silence. "Do you love her? Not like love her, I know you love her, do- but do you love love her?"_

_She bit her lip. There was never any doubt about that. That had been true for a very long time now. "I do. With all my heart." It kinda felt weird, discussing this._

" _Why don't you two come over for dinner tonight?"_

_Elsa's heart fluttered. She smiled genuinely. "We'd love to."_

And in no time, they were at the new apartment. In significantly more time, they had unloaded the cars.

"Well, me and Eugene have a date to be getting to," their friend said, pulling them into a quick group hug. "I'll see you two later, I demand to see it when you're unpacked!"

Anna giggled. "As if we'd even have a choice, Ms. Frying pan lover."

Elsa furrowed her brow. Rapunzel scrunched her nose in a grin about as menacing as a kitten. "Hey, watch it, you, this frying pan lover knows how to fight."

"Bye, Rapunzel," the platinum blonde butted in. "We'll see you soon."

In a matter of moments, they were alone. About fifty boxes, random items strewn about, and the only piece of furniture being a deflated air bed that'd just have to do until they could go get some actual furniture.

"So," Anna said, her voice husky as she rose to her tippy-toes to plant a warm kiss on Elsa's lips. She dragged her finger down the curve of her elder's neck, eliciting a delightful shudder from her. "What do you say we inflate that airbed before we start on the boxes?"

Elsa chewed her lip over her pounding heart. Her knees stiffened close together and a pleasant warmth began its growth just below her stomach. "I say that's a great idea." She slid her hands beneath the waistband of Anna's pants and gently dragged her nails back up her spine, causing it to arch sharply and Anna's breath to hitch.

She smirked and found the air pump. They didn't unpack until much later that evening.

* * *

Meg turned out to be a fantastic help to Elsa and Anna when they were searching for apartments. She gave them pointers, what to look for in a tour, how to read the leasing contract, and kept track of the current market values for them. They really would have been a lot more stressed about it if she hadn't been there.

At the woman's insistence, she'd come over to see their place a couple weeks after they moved in. Despite the occasional box still laying around, it was pretty well decorated. Well, at least it had everything they needed, and some decor on the walls to keep it inviting.

Elsa had adjusted well. She'd made a little reading nook in the corner of the living room. And by that, she meant a giant bean-bag chair with humongous pillows around it for her to sink into and pretty much drown in when she felt like wading into a book. Their bedroom had a queen sized mattress- all of which they used- and overall, as Elsa stepped into the threshold with Meg and her new boyfriend in tow, she was happy with how right it felt to call it home.

It was much easier than she thought it'd be.

"Wow, look at this place," she marveled, inviting herself into the middle of the living room and spinning to take in the view. "It's so cozy, I love how you've used the space."

Elsa smiled. "Thank you."

The guy who might as well have been a giant made of pure muscle piped up. "When did you move in?" _What was his name again?_

"Hercules-" _oh yeah-_ "I just told you that, like half an hour ago." Meg looked at him expectantly, but he just put up a dopey smile and shrugged.

Chuckling, Elsa offered "it's okay. A couple weeks ago."

"Wow," he said, taking better stock of the room, "you guys unpacked fast. Last time I moved in somewhere it took me- well, I'm still unpacking."

"You goof," Meg said, kissing him chastly. "So where's Anna?" She turned to her friend.

"In class, she should be back within an hour, then we can eat."

"Chinese?"

"I-"

"I'm feeling Chinese." Her voice left no room for protest, Meg had made up her mind.

Elsa shrugged. "Chinese sounds good."

Anna was particularly handsy under the table that night. It made Elsa wonder exactly what she _did_ all day in class. Surely not sit there and work herself into a horny mess, right? She could almost see it, Anna trying not to think of anything, but it's not hard to guess how that would work out.

Elsa smirked, slapping her sister's hand away.

An adorable little whimper came from Anna. She'd already eaten all her noodles. She had a spot of sauce on her lip, and Elsa desperately wanted to lick it off.

But Meg was there. And Hercules. Maybe she could still… _No, no._ Meg would surely not mind, right? _That's not exactly the way to tell someone such a thing though._ Elsa almost laughed out loud. _Nice to see you, excuse me while I make out with my sister, who, by the way, I'm dating._ One day. Not today. She threw a quick wink to her sister, flicking her eyes towards the bedroom.

Anna understood, a rosy, devilish grin blossoming on her freckled face. "Uh, Elsa, remember, you owe me a favor helping me unpack tonight."

Elsa flushed. "Yes, I know, just try not to yell at me if I put something in the wrong place."

"Elsa!" Anna squeaked in surprise, eyes wide as saucers.

The elder raised an eyebrow at her lover.

Reddened cheeks peppered with freckles turned into the most impish look Elsa had ever seen in her entire life. "You can put the stuff wherever you want."

"What do you guys have to unpack tonight?" Meg asked over a mouthful of sesame chicken.

"Clothes!"

"Shoes!"

They both chirped at the same time.

"Clothes and shoes, shoes and clothes, yep, eh-heh," Anna corrected.

"Man, this stuff is good," Hercules luckily interrupted, slurping lomaine into his mouth. He'd gone through maybe three or four servings already. Elsa wondered if he'd ever stop eating.

"Sure is," Anna chimed in. She was just happy for the change in subject.

Meg raised an eyebrow at them, but didn't push the subject.

That night, Anna's eyes bulged in surprise when Elsa's fingers explored some new areas on her body.

* * *

On her way home that evening, Meg found her mind wandering to Agnarr. Unbeknownst to her, Anna would be trapped in thoughts about the very same person the next morning. Her car drove with an uneven gait due to the hulking, sexy, and downright goofy mass of muscles sitting next to her.

Hercules was a good person. He hadn't exactly come across that way at first, but he was. It was the opposite of Agnarr. _He_ had appeared to be a great guy at first glance: friendly, polite, maybe a little bit reserved, but a single father caring for two girls, one of which he let to stay home while she took university courses.

He'd said he let her because it saved her money and Anna didn't want to be separated from her.

Which was true.

But a lie.

A lie of omission. She hadn't even noticed how little he talked about Elsa until she actually met the girls. _How_ he could have failed to mention something as important as his eldest daughter being _agoraphobic_ was beyond her. It didn't make sense. Which is why she began suspecting something was up.

But hating Elsa? His own daughter? For an accident? Sure it must have been a horrible, agonizing, awful thing for him to go through, but it was for Elsa, and Anna too. He seemed to understand that about Anna.

She couldn't even imagine how depressing it must have been for the poor girl. It was written all over her face, in her words and actions when they'd given Meg the rundown of everything she didn't know.

" _As I'm sure you know," Anna had said, "there was an accident. But how much do you know about the accident?"_

_Meg looked between the two sisters across from her. They were away from the house, sitting in a rather private corner couch at a coffee shop. She'd met them several months ago, and since then, things had been less stable with Agnarr the more she thought about it. "Just that Elsa was there, and Idunn…" she didn't want to slap Elsa like that._

_Anna nodded, Elsa gulped, clutching a mug of hot chocolate between her hands like it was the only source of heat for miles. "Elsa and mom were out- out Christmas shopping. She hit some ice and Elsa-" Anna wrapped her arm around her sister's waist, giving her a comforting hug, "took the brunt of dad's emotions."_

_There was a pause while the older woman processed this. She chewed her lip, something, she noticed, that Anna was doing as well. Elsa was staring into the swirls of her cocoa. "What exactly did that entail?"_

_The younger sister took a breath to speak, but Elsa piped up, her voice sticking to her throat. "H-he blamed me. For it."_

" _Why would he blame you!?" Shocked. That's what Meg was._

" _Because," Anna took the reigns, "she wanted to go Christmas shopping for my present. So I guess that'd make it as much my fault as Elsa's."_

_Leaning in, Meg offered "there's no blame to be had for anyone, it was an accident, you-"_

" _We know," the young girl assured. "I don't blame Elsa, Elsa doesn't blame me, I don't blame me, and-" the sisters met each other's gaze and stared deeply for a few moments. Meg almost cooed at how close they were. She low-key always kinda wanted a sister._

" _...and I don't blame myself, anymore." Elsa finished._

" _But he still blames you for it."_

" _Not just that," the platinum blonde continued, fidgeting in place. "He um- he h-hated me. Hates me. Still hates me. For it. For the accident."_

_Meg grimaced. "Well, thank you two, for being honest with me, and opening up to me. It's not nice to know I've been being lied to, but it's nice to be told the truth." She glanced between the two. There was quietude as the girls looked like they didn't know what to say. Anna just looked indecisive, Elsa appeared content to sit there and silently nurse her drink. "I'm certainly not interested in being with someone who's so…" she tried to think of a way to say it politely. "Who's such an inconsiderate asshole," is what she came up with._

_This earned a surprised chuckled from Anna and a snort from Elsa. Meg smiled. "We should make this coffee thing a weekly thing, we can keep up."_

And they had, until it was too hot out to go get hot coffee, and everyone seemed to become busy all at once. They'd come a long, long way since then, and with that distance, everything that was such a problem then seemed so small now.

She smiled and grabbed Herc's hand.

* * *

"Elsa," Anna whispered.

"Hmm?" They were lounging on the couch in their pajamas, Elsa running her long, slender fingers gently along her sister's scalp while reading. It felt _insanely_ good, and Anna got lost in the prickling skin running down her spine for a second.

"What do you think dad's doing right now?"

Surprised, Elsa turned away from her book to look at Anna. Her hand stopped moving. "Hm," she contemplated. "The same thing he always does, I suppose. Out drinking or drowning himself in his work."

"Do you think he's happy? Do you think he'll ever be happy?"

"I think the real question is 'do I care if he'll ever be happy?'" She took stock of her sister, who was actively chewing her lower lip in thought. "Do you?"

It was quite a while before Anna answered. Elsa could practically see as thoughts flashed behind Anna's eyes. Her stomach twisted in wait for an answer, even the neighbors seemed to know to be extra quiet for the moment.

"No," the younger girl shook her head. "No, I don't think I do." It was okay for not everyone to have a happy ending, she'd decided. He hadn't changed, so why would his ending change? And more importantly, her and Elsa were staring in the face of happily ever after. Their father had been a miserable monster to Elsa, and Anna more recently (he didn't take well them kissing on the couch), and despite spending so much energy hoping to mend their family relationship, Anna found that it was a better solution to just leave him be. For her and Elsa's happiness, to save them grief, stress, and disappointment. Sometimes, it's just not worth the energy. If he wants a happily ever after, he can do it himself, she decided.

Elsa's mouth stretched into an excited, loving smile. That chapter, that difficult and unfair chapter of their lives was closed. And as she looked around, Anna and her together, with their own space and their own futures, futures that were tangled to each other- in the best way- she realized that now, a new chapter was beginning for them.

A _beautiful_ new chapter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for enjoying this journey! I love you all :D


End file.
